why teenage girls
Why teenage girls shouldn’t vote
(George W. Bush and The Jonas Brothers)
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Well… they can’t vote until they are 18… and if you are 18 and still crushing on these guys…. then you got more problems then just our bogus political system.
I believe we’ve found something else we can agree on. (Although considering that there seems to be a disturbing number of women MY age harboring lusty thoughts about the kid from that “Twilight” movie….*is creeeeeeeped out by this*)
The guy on the left looks like a younger, less angry Hyde from That 70s Show.
Even in my tween years, I would have gone “EEEUW!”
That looks like what Bush is thinking in the background. You can’t see his whole face, but it looks fairly unimpressed.
Dang. Now I have to admit to agreeing with him on something besides his AIDS work in Africa.
I have a bummed now!
*offers cookies*
*nom nom nom*
Thank you Charro! I’m feeling better now!
Teen girls running America, like, for sure, for sure, like ya know, IDK! *giggle*
Take comfort in the fact that AIDS work he did was not his idea
And even if that doesn’t help, just know there are still plenty of people with AIDS to go around! Oh wait… thats more depressing than anything…
More cookies, please?!?
*passes cookies*
I was not into stupid tweeny pop in my tween years either. Ok, maybe I was I don’t remember. Hell, I barely remember last week.
“What’s the date?”
“Uh its Tuesday the 20th”
“NO THE YEAR YOU FOOL! THE YEAR!”
charro sweetie….you in..THE FUTURE
Lean on me
And I’m gonna lean on you
We’re headed for the future
And the future’s now
Show you how
i can has lotto numbers from the future?
242 666 187
Oh wait those are the numbers on the barcode I have on the back of my head. Sorry.
There is no anger permitted in Disney Nation… no hate, no love, no creativity. Just smile and ride the rides. There….that’s better.
Suddenly I feel calmer than I have in a long time. Calm… and apathetic…. Thank you Disney Nation!
It’s a small world after all!
Good, good. Now, children…your wallets…open them…yesssssss
And, your parents wallets… yeeeessss…
Ahh…Mickey smiles…henh henh henh……..
I never did trust that wascally wodent!
It’s because he’s a black mouse isn’t it? Bet you loooooove that white duck Donald, huh? Fvcking racist.
pluto is yellow…does that make the dog asian?
Speaking of which, did you hear Minnie was kicked out of Disneyland? They found out she was f*cking goofy..
I’m not touching that one.
That’s what Mickey said when he found out.
I always heard it as:
Mickey and Minnie go to divorce court.
Judge says “Mr. Mouse, you simply cannot divorce your wife because she is crazy.”
Mickey says “I didn’t say she was crazy, I said she was fukcing Goofy!”
*groans*
Thanks charro.. I was close though!
I prefer the VNV Nation.. Myself…
VNV Nation is without a doubt bringing better lyrics and beats to the table. And the clubs that play thier music is full of the dead sexeh people!
You mean giant fat hairy scottsmen named Fat Bastard?
I’m dead sexeh. Look at mah sexeh bodeh!!!
Babeh- it’s the other other white meat.
Mmmm. Fat Bastard. Now I want me some red wine!! Shiraz, please!
Don’ forget the Hagus babeh! Mmmmmmmmmmm.
*haggis
and it’s quite yummy.
My first reaction is to go,”urg” at the haggis since my Scottish friends have all gone into great detail about the contents. But then I remember…I’m from the Philadelphia area and I LOVE scrapple. Ah well………
I’m pretty sure he’s Irish. And not fat. And incredibly nice.
“there seems to be a disturbing number of women MY age harboring lusty thoughts about the kid from that “Twilight” movie”
I’ve noticed the same phenomenon with my 30/40-something coworkers. And the disturbing number of mature women that believe that the main relationship in “Twilight” is oh-so-incredibly-romantic and not the least bit stalker-abusive/controlling is just as disturbing. It is extremely creepy.
I had a roommate who was all insanely swoony over New Kids on the Block when she was already in her 20s. Maybe it was her way of avoiding relationships with men her own age, by idealizing these very “safe” boys. Who knows? I just found it weird.
That’s because it IS weird. *shudders a little*
I find the New Kids recent return kinda interesting. I’m guessing the girls who loved them back in the 80s and 90s want to see the New Kids now that they’re legal?
What?!? They’re back?? Oh jesus no!!!
I don’t Jesus is responsible for this one. I’m thinking…could it be…SATAN?!
Well. Isn’t that special.
My wife went to their last two concerts. Took my daughter to the second one. She’s a big New Kids fan too. Yeah, I stayed home for that.
The prudent choice, clearly.
Clearly!
*Pulls out the NKOTB sheets, pins, jacket, and posters*
oh yeah, I’ve been waiting for this for years
Totally weird. Link to an article in Ms magazine, that totally hits the anti-feminist aspects of ‘Twilight’
clearly twilight is racist
the paler your skin, the more powerful you are!
Reminds me of the women who think that song “Kiss from an Angel” is so romantic. Do they not realize that he’s talking to his ex while his gf is in the other room? How on Earth is that romantic?
I got a better one: People that think that “Every Breath You Take” by the Police is romantic and use it as the first dance at their wedding. It’s a song aboult stalking!!
True story. My mom was a church secretary and had many excellent wedding stories. One couple insisted on having the Beatles song “Yesterday” played during the ceremony. Now, for just a minute, think about the lyrics to that song….
because youth is appealing?
just remember all the guys getting squishy over lohan ( before she went crack whore lesbian )
or the current lust for emma watson
or the countdown till the owlson twins became 18
Who’s emma watson?
she plays the chick in the harry potter movies, the one who is not one of the two dudes
The one with the unpronounceable name?
its pronounced Her-moe-ney
Huh, I thought it was Her-my-nee?
Close. It’s Her-My-O-Nee.
*hangs head* Yes, I know I’m a nerd.
And her last name is Granger, which is a really stupid, stupid last name.
When i first read it, it looked like ‘her-moin’.
I agree. Granger is a TERRIBLE last name.
I know, right? Grangers suck. Hell, Hermione is the most famous Granger there is, and she’s a fictional character.
HURGLE-GURGLE! Is that the correct pronunciation??
The chick who isn’t one of the two dudes. Thanks, BT, I needed that laugh.
By the way, welcome to one place where nerd-dome is really OK!
Thanks VG!
Oh, last weekend I overheard two middle-aged dads commenting lewdly on the highschool girls in a football homecoming court….that squicked me out, too.
Funny story: I was trying to convince my sons to move to Australia (they’re both 23) and they asked, “Are the girls hot?” I told them I couldn’t reply reply to that without sounding like an old perv. They said, put yourself in our shoes.. all I could say was yes.
are your sons hot? (a girl’s gotta ask these things… i ask on behalf of myself and jane)
Yeah, they’re actually pretty good looking. Of course, you realize there is going to be a certain amount of bias, right?
*books flight to where ever eddie’s sons are*
What about me, shortright?
*eye bleach*
Window shopping can be fun too.
Why does that require eye bleach?
rando – apparently cyan doesn’t appreciate sex. which means it’s a good thing that DWN isn’t around a whole lot… even though we all miss him.
Ooooooh, Cyan is on the wrong web site. Yikes.
my thoughts exactly. if sex is an eye bleach-able situation then cyan is not long for the PK world.
on a totally unrelated note i get to see the boy tonight.
Yay, and that shouldn’t be unrelated!
diss, my note was very tongue in cheek. it’s totally related.
-grabs up charro and does bad bad things with her in many different positions-
I want to look at Eddie’s sons, too. In a relationship doesn’t mean DEAD! Promise to leave all touching to the.original-shortright and Jane, though!
ed… i do believe this means you have to send a link to pics of your sons. you’ve got at least 4 women (me, charro, mina, and VG) who want to see them! lol.
plus, “they’re both 23″…… does this mean………………. twins????
bitter troll is single too! can he touch your sons? bitter troll has candy in his van
Let me find some and post them up on photobucket. And yes, they’re twins.. not identical, not fraternal.. they are what is known as mirror twins. They look an awful lot alike, but one is left handed, the other right.
Oooh, mirror twins! I’ve always found that completely fascinating. Like, their fingerprints are opposite, right?
Oooo. Doublemint twins, AND I would be a cougar! …well, if I wasn’t involved…
Just to add, I find it genetically fascinating and really cool; not that I’d mess with 23 year olds.
I don’t know about the fingerprints. But to give you an example, when they were both little and losing teeth they would lose them at the same time, but on opposite sides. It was actually pretty weird..
OK, me neither. They look a bit like cute aliens at my age. But if she’s discrete, a gal can drool a little bit. Right?
*is 24*
i’m allowed to be interested in 23 year old twins in ways other than genetically. MWA HA HA!
*charro is sore from having bad things done in many different positions*
Hm, I’m 25 so I suppose that means I’m allowed to be as well.
-snuggles charro- bitter troll has solution to that west burro church who protests the funerals…
…putin-nods-
diplomatic immunity
can kill them all
does not care about anyone’s right to free speech
Ok, here you go:
{http://s944.photobucket.com/albums/ad290/EddieTheFloydist/}
Daaaaaad! You put me on the internet?!
Shhhhhhhh! What they don’t know won’t hurt them.
@ charro – HA!
@ eds – your boys are cute! i swear i went to college with someone who looks exactly like the one with longer hair… you can tell your boys that they’re famous on the internet. lol!
They’re hot alright. Literally.
You were sitting next to Kevin Spacey and Kevin Spacey?
You might say Kevin was beside himself..
He might have been of two minds…
malkovich malkovich malkovich
Oh, I loved that movie, SB. It was a bit weird, but you gotta love John Malkovich..
Ah, BT, I didn’t look at it that way. Youth has a beauty and appeal of its own. But that doesn’t make certain people’s actions/thoughts any less creepy.
“Yesterday”?? No way!!! Buuahahahahahaaa! “Now I need a place to hide away”? OMG, that’s too funny. Thanks, Diss!
if bitter troll ever gets married bitter troll will want the song ” relax” played
I want “Whip It”.
Well, I’ve suggested that we use “Rock and Roll Pt. II” for the processional, but I really think that’ll only work if we can afford the laser light show and smoke machines for the ceremony. *This plan may have to be cut back…
I want Nine Inch Nails “Closer” to be played if my wife and I renew our vows.
That’s very romantic. If I renew my vows, I want.. Um.. Consolidated “You Suck” played. Google the lyrics..
Drowning Pool – Let The Bodies Hit The floor
Beat you on the Drowning Pool by 3 minutes, Eddie.
(Look below)
I can just imagine my grandmother being there. “He wants to do WHAT like an animal???!!!”
rando – you have to include the one older relative who hears it and then asks you later who sings the song because they “think it’s a snazzy tune”.
Yeah, I saw that Rando.. good call by both of us, eh?
Funny, Eddie, I didn’t really picture you as a Drowning Pool fan, being OLD and stuff. That’s the young people music.
It’s the influence of my kids. I also like Godsmack, Kings of Leon, Maroon 5, and of course the older stuff. You would be surprised at what is actually in my CD collection. I will say though that you will not find one rap artist.. NONE!
Okay Eds, I’ve got a rap music challenge for you. I dare you to listen to this and not dig it.
{http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/80443364/}
Ok, I listened and to be honest, I didn’t understand 99.9% of what was said. It’s just not really my type of music. Now, I won’t disparage Rap because I know it’s a form of poetry and expression. But, I might have a better appreciation if I could make out what they’re trying to say.
But it’s such a toe tapper Eds!
“Suddenly….I’m not half the man I used to be….there’s a shadow hanging over me…”
Amazon river version. “Suddenly, I’m not half the man I used to be…there is nothing hanging under me…”
courtesy of a nasty breakup.
Yeah, that just about sums up most marriages I’ve seen lately. Maybe I’ll sugest that to my brother and the bit…I mean his fiancee.
I think a more appropriate song would be “Master of Puppets” by Metallica.. That’s how I felt through most of my first marriage.
I haven’t heard that one. I’ll have to listen to it, though I can tell from the title that it’s probably the more appropriate choice for them as well.
when the bride walks down the isle…we will play something from beastie boys..
My current plan is to throw a bucket of Holy water on her and watch her dissolve into evil goo.
Ooooooooooooh, that would be cool to see! We expect photos..
I’ll post the video on Youtube. This is about a year away though, so don’t get upset of you don’t see it soon.
Just as I side note, I’ve been thinking about it and I think I want to walk down the aisle to the Imperial March.
suddenly bitter troll might love and want to marry mina based off that last statement <3
Thanks! It’s always nice to know that your geekiness is appreciated.
Your brother is marrying my brother’s ex-wife? Small world, huh?
Actually I think she is divorced so that might be the case.
charro is now jealous of Mina.
Don’t be- I might be willing to share.
The conversation just got much less boring.
*grumbles* It SHOULD be the other way around, damnit.
-smooches and hugs charro- now now bitter troll wubs his charro
Ok, ok, I know when to bow out. Don’t want to step on any toes at the moment. I will go find another man who can appreciate the geekiness.
*looks online to see if their are any Ren Fests coming soon*
-twitchs and tries to hide his ren fest costume-
Now I’m just lost.
*sigh* I can see where this is going.
-rubs charros shoulders and smiles-
ren fest is where hoomans dress up in mid-evil and ren era clothing, knights, peasents, kings stuff like that, dance sing and eat turkey legs
bitter troll is told grimmiekins loves them
I know what a Ren Faire is darling. I’ve been to one. I meant, I can see where you and Mina are going…
Rando, here, I brought a map.
>.<
charro need not worry about her bitter troll
he has flag in him remember?
I know dear. But you still may stray…
Hm, maybe I should try a con instead? No Ren Fests here for a couple of months anway. And I don’t travel well. The light, it does bad things to a person. And not the fun kind of bad things either.
bah, that chance is in every hooman, but bitter troll is happy to TALK to mina, but do bad bad things to the charro…infront of everyone..in a tub of green jello
Talk is good. Don’t want to start anything with anyone. Well, no one on here anyway.
bitter troll sad, cant afford ot go to halloween horror nights since car broke down
was looking forward to it all year
What’s Halloween Horror Nights?
universal studios has a huge month long halloween party down here in florida
do a search for the fun
That stinks that you can’t go. We don’t have anything nearly that fun for Halloween around here. Though one of my friends has a pretty kick butt party every year.
I’m planning on eating any children that come to the door.
Just some of the words:
End of passion play, crumbling away
Im your source of self-destruction
Veins that pump with fear, sucking darkest clear
Leading on your deaths construction
Taste me you will see
More is all you need
Youre dedicated to
How Im killing you
Come crawling faster
Obey your master
Your life burns faster
Obey your master
Master
Master of puppets Im pulling your strings
Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams
Blinded by me, you cant see a thing
Just call my name, `cause Ill hear you scream
Master
Master
Just call my name, `cause Ill hear you scream
Master
Master
Wedding song?… seems inadvisable.[/understatement]
perhaps motley crew’s girls girls girls?
Perhaps not.
We must now come up with the LEAST appropriate song for a wedding. I’ll start with “Superfreak” by Rick James.
“Hot For Teacher” by Van Halen
‘Down with the Sickness’, by whoever sings it…
Def Leppard “Pour Some Sugar On Me”
@ CyanEyed
Disturbed
@HelOnWheels: Didn’t Mary Kay Letourneau play that at her wedding?
that old country western song “your cheating heart”!!
@Diss – As soon as I typed the title I thought EXACTLY that!! LMAO!
@Diss – I think she also played “Jailbait” by Motorhead.
Come to think of it, “Jailbait” could be appropriate at a certain type of wedding. So, I don’t think it qualifies for this list.
If you knew my ex-wife you wouldn’t say that.. as they say, hindsight is always 20-20.
New Sh!t – Marilyn Manson.
Bodies by Drowning Pool. Totally. Or Freak on a Leash by Korn.
Money for Nothin! Dire Straits!
How about R.E.M., “Losing My Religion”?
” its the end of the world as we know it….its the end of the world as we know it…and i feel Fiinnneee”
“this is the last day of our acquaintaince” (Sinead O’Conner…about a divorce meeting)
or
“Crucify” (Tori Amos)
or
“They call me Cleopatra, because I’m the queen of denial”
(Pam Tillis)
You Oughta Know, Alanis Morrissette.
I was thinking “Stupid Girl” by Garbage.
Eddie, you can get a version of that played by a string quartet, suitable for all nuptial occasions.
Seems to me that one should avoid anything with ’scorched earth’ in the name when choosing a wedding theme.
You don’t think “No One Gets Out of Here Alive” is a good central theme to stage your wedding around? *blinks innocently*
@Diss – WIN!!
*blinks dumbfoundedly*
@ Diss- I think it’s the perfect theme for a wedding.
Which, come to think of it, if you actually used it as a theme, it would make the song “Five to One” by the Doors appropriate:
Five to one, baby
One in five
No one here gets out alive, now
You get yours, baby
I’ll get mine
Gonna make it, baby
If we try
Jumping in where there is a reply button showing –
Disturbed FTW!! (My son introduced me to them.)
You know what’s funny? As I’ve gotten older, my tastes in music have tended more towards harder rock and metal instead away from it. When I was a kid, it was all classic rock (esp. the Beatles). I didn’t start listening to a lot of more recent rock until it had stopped being cool (like 80’s rock). Now I listen to a lot more metal and alternative than I ever listened to as a teen.
Ok, I might have actually heard it then. Those lyrics look very familar. I’ll have to look through my old albums, I may already have it.
Nothing like headbanging down the aisle.
Reminds me of this couple’s “save the date” video. Which I kinda love.
I have some friends who used “One” by U2 as their first dance song. It’s just…wrong…in so many ways.
Did I ask too much?
More than a lot?
You gave me nothing,
Now it’s all I got …
Yeah, that’s great.
did I dissappoint you
or leave a bad taste in your mouth
you act like you never had love
and you want me to go without…
you say love is a temple, love the higher law
you ask me to enter, but then you make me crawl
and I can’t be holding on to what you got
when all you got is hurt
Yeah…no.
My brother used the Beach Boys “God Only Knows” for his and his wife’s first dance.
I may not always love you
But long as there are stars above you
You never need to doubt it
Ill make you so sure about it
God only knows what Id be without you
If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me
Uh. That doesn’t sound particularly romantic either.
It’s a wedding song for realists! lol
Terrible.
Well, the answer to “god only know what I’d be without you” is “unemployed and living with my mom again.” But she was a succubus for sure.
Oh, it’s that brother. I remember now.
A succubus.. are you he wasn’t married to the same person I was?!?!
Pretty sure. Although the succubus’ new fiance looks like an even fatter version of me, which is odd.
Hot doppleganger action. Wait no that is creepy.
mmmmm all the sexy of twincest p0rn with out the creepy factor
I can safely say I have never watched twincest porn. While sober.
sober is not the best way to watch it…but its still entertaining-nods-
Yeah Diss, I once got asked to sing “Memories” from CATS at a wedding reception by one of my friends…
I just looked at her cocked my head to the side and said “You have listened to the song right? And I don’t mean ‘heard the song’ I mean, LISTENED to it?”
Yep. My thoughts exactly, if rather belatedly.
Thank Harry my daughter is nine and still thinks boys smell funny.
Oh don’t you worry! I am sure that MTV will provide your daughter with another boy band of thier chosing by the time she is 13!
If they don’t, you can be sure Disney will.
I used to think Disney was the devil till I remembered that Brittany, Justin, and Christina are all spawns from MMC. Now I KNOW it’s the devil!
Well, crap. And it’s my hard-earned money going towards their merchandise…
Wow. A Jonas brothers lol. That is quite original and funny. Please make more of these.
Damn… I thought this was Hanson….
Best. Answer. Ever.
It could have been Nickleback.. now those guys need to be made fun of.. daily!
Anything related to Spider-Man 3 should be heckled to no end.
bitter troll theatre presents :
Spiderman 3..atleast the ending
Sandman: Grrrrr im a giant sand monster now, but i never wanted this, but i will kidnap this girl, but im a real nice guy who just has bad luck and made a few wrong choices, now i will try to murder spiderman too, but im sorry -pouty sand face-
mary jane: AHHHHH CRAP IM KIDNAPPED AGAIN..nevermind…im breaking up with you pete…or not…lil confused…but you did hit me you dak!
Venom: hi…im tv’s topher grace…rawr…bye
Harry goblin: ok i will stop blameing you for my fathers death, even thou i know the goblin was a murdering monster..and my father was clearly the goblin…crap venom used 2 of his 6 seconds on screen to kill me…well bye
spiderman: can i stop emo danceing now? ok…saved the day..big shocker huh? mary jane im sorry i became abusive and gloaty over the spideman thing…but the really bad stuff was the suit so i dont have to take personal responceblity for it.
Bruce Campbell: still the only guy to defeat spider man back in spidey two..wasnt i great as the waiter? go rent ” they call me bruce” or ” bubba ho tep”
LOL!!!
-pouty sand face-
ROFL!!!
-tv’s topher grace…rawr…bye-
OMG LOL Can’t Breathe Halp!!!
At least in your version I felt like there was character devlopment. None in the actual movie.
Or the way too ignored The Adventures of Briscoe County.
bitter troll loves him some briscoe county jr!
who doesn’t!
srsly, there’s a Evil Dead musical up here in D.C. until the end of october.. i’m so excited
OK, I’ll do the Clinton Tapes:
I had a fight with Gore.
I screwed up Whitewater-put the *special* in special prosecutor.
Chirac is a weasel! Grrrrr.
I had a fight with Gore.
The Scandal Machine hurts – ouch!
If Saddam gets taken out they’ll be civil warrrr.
Tee hee, drunk Boris hailed a cab in his undies!
I had a fight with Gore.
*twitches uncontrollably* Must…kill…Chad Kroger…
*whispers*
I’ll help you dispose of the body.
I own about 50 acres of land. No one lives there. I’m just saying.
Nickleback – dude sounds like he’s working real hard in the bathroom if you understand what I meeeeeeeeeaaaaaannnnnnnnnn.
I hate Nickleback.
But not as much as I hate Creed. If I ever see Scott Stapp in person I’m going to knee him in the groin.
Is anyone else familiar with the “Sergio’s White-Hot Top 5″ segment on Infomania? He recently earned even more of my love by bashing Nickelback. (It’s at the beginning of the segment).
there’s no linky, diss.
Sorry. Not sure what happened there. Trying that again.
According to Pop Up Video back in the day, Scott Stapp swapped his first and middle names because his initials were ASS. I think if Stapp and Chad Kroger made a record together, the result would destroy the universe.
I like exactly 2 Nickleback songs. And I hate myself for that.
There is absolutely nothing redeeming about Nickleback! Even the two songs they play to death on the radio puts my teeth on edge and I want to punch something. If I ever meet Chad Kroger, I plan giving that guy a serious kick to the groin for even thinking he could sing.
I think I can safely say that Nickleback writes the worst lyrics in the history of mankind.
I’m still trying to understand the fascination with ABBA (at least here in Australia). I mean, ABBA?!?!
I love ABBA!
No wait, I mean this fascination trancends just loving them. There must be at 3 or 4 tribute groups running around here dedicated to ABBA. And the amazing thing is, the shows are always packed out.
Please immediately direct us to the location of your original and funny lols so that we may praise them and vote for them. Thank you.
*waits expectantly*
*whistling, tapping foot, checking watch….*
*sets up tent, waiting for non-reg to present lols*
*pretends to suffer from narcolepsy*
*gets really hungry during the long wait fro lols. builds fire, starts cooking for PK non-trolls*
Cooking what? the trolls? I hear they are exceedingly bitter. And not good for eatn’
not true! they make excellent jerky
bitter butter makes them better
“I hear they are exceedingly bitter”
Nope. That’s only Bitter Troll. But I would never cook BT.
The trolls are weak and lazy, which makes them fat. They make for good roasting.
interwebs trolls make very good eating , when bitter troll cant find a fat juicey child sleeping in bed in the middle of the night, he prefers interwebs trolls. or a sandwich
*tries to calm the crowd by presenting a few of his own lols*
Diss and Eddie have also presented lols! *points upwards at their posts*
Lefty, the one with Biden talking about Scooby Doo is FUNNY!
I agree! And I always thought Velma was shortchanged as well.
Oh, and diss, the jacket one was pretty damn funny!
Thanks, Eds! I was surprised to see my “periodic table” one on upcoming; after I submitted it I thought “Oh, nobody’s going to think that’s funny!”
Oh that was you? I didn’t even notice that. Cool. I’ve got one on upcoming too…Bush taking Putin to Hooters. LOL
Love that one!
I always feel bad when I laugh at my own jokes, but I am kinda proud of that one. Heh heh.
Invisible political handjob – LOL
And so the White House Puppet Theater proceeds with its annual reenactment of all three of Dick Cheney’s heart attacks.
three heart attacks??? hope none of them where fatal
See all three on Failblog.
Two of them were, the third was just gas.
He died twice?????
You didn’t realize he’s a zombie? Or a cat.
If he’s a cat, he needs to be put down.
I think I’d rather go with zombie on this one. Calling him a cat would be an insult to my kitty.
actually it’s a dreadful story, you see, the original cheney was a machine controlled by a maniacal cat seeking world domination. that one ate a bad taco and ’sploded, killing the kitty. but, kitty wasn’t really dead! it was a ruse. kitty came back in a cloned body of cheney, using mind control to try and continue his dominance of the world!! but, alas, kitty was bitten by a zombie.. and because of the mind control cheney was forced to believe he was a zombie. thus his mind was damaged and he was doomed to think he was a zombie.
that clear things up at all?
I think my brains are now leaking out of my ears…
Was it Clinton’s cat? THAT CAT IS A MURDERER!
MUUUUUUUURDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!1
He’s died at least twice. It takes a whole lot of death to keep that much evil down.
Well, yeah. Haven’t any of you people ever seen a horror movie?
Then where the fvck is Zombie Nixon?
Behind you!
ZOMG Zombie Nixon is…spying on me. Paranoid freak.
Nixon wasnt evil, he was cold and ruthless, but he was far from evil.
Cheney is evil…
Nixon was a sad, sorry little man and he has my pity. Farewell!
Cheney was crafty, the cats are evil.
I’m going to quickly point out that this should be on ROFLazzi and then move on. Seriously. Why are we having so much bleed-over from these other sites??
Bush is lurking in the background is the only possible answer..
bush could of redeemed his entire failed presidencey by shouting ” they have guns, secret service shoot to kill!”
Heck with that, just set up a hunting trip with Cheney.. accidents happen in the wilderness you know.
-NEWSFLASH- from the bitter troll news desk
former vice president Cheney shot , killed, skinned and ate the jonas brothers today, later was seen wearing the face of one of them as a mask while telling their money who whored them out to disney in the first place
telling their MOMMY**
clarity now > clarity before
I agree. I would support the “Bush = Best President EVAR” if he did that..
Their hands over their hearts, one of them has his microphone to his face—don’t tell me they’re actually “singing” the National Anthem?
I can’t believe no one’s pointed that out till now.
No wonder Bush looks so annoyed. I can only imagine.
You mean some “singers” don’t actually sing? They just lipsync? Next thing you’re going to tell me is there’s no Santa Clause.
Roseanne Barr didn’t lipsync the national anthem and look where it got her!
You’re right, sometimes it’s better to lipsync.
It worked so well for Milli Vanilli and C &C Music Factory….
And Duran Duran.
(Saw them live, and no one can run around like that and still sound exactly like the album!)
What about the Celtic Women? No way they are running like that and playing the fiddle that way. I even noticed the one blonde getting her hair caught up in the bow. Do you still call that lip syncing?
Girl, you know it’s truuuuuue!
Every body dance now…
Blame it on the raiiiin yeah yeah.
ok. i’m a teenage girl. and i think there riddiclos(yeah i know thats not how you spell it)
apparently you don’t even know how to sound out the words. i fear for the school systems.
*they’re (a contraction of they are)
*ridiculous
learn these words. they will help you in the future. like, if you ever apply for a job above mcdonalds.
The sad part is, the Jonas Brothers can probably spell better.
TOS, don’t fear for the school systems, fear for the students in these school systems. Fear for us: Maxie is the future.
*runs away, screaming at the horror*
oh fu(k… this is the future leadership of the country. *cries*
i can’t wait til bills going through the government are all written in text speech with “LOL” and emoticons scattered throughout.
ZOMG I’M WRITING A BILL!!!11!!!!
IM IN UR CNGRSS RITIN’ UR LAWZ.
OMG WE PWNED THAT FILIBUSTER. WTF JOE WILSON IS TEH SUXXORS.
this exchange made me LOL*. but in a very sad “i hope it never comes to this” sort of way.
* – this is the most text-speak i’m willing to use. even when texting.
If you know that’s not how one spells “ridiculous” why do you not spell it correctly? Do you think it’s cool to appear illiterate? And it’s “THEY’RE ridiculous” (as in, THEY ARE) not “there ridiculous” (as in, OVER THERE – location).
That would involve taking precious time away from… whatever kids do online nowadays to look up the correct spelling.
facebook and myspace. or some other immense waste of time.
*leaves PK to go check FB*
whut??
Now, now, don’t start on FB. I love me some Mafia Wars!
if you’re on FB why are you not in “the PK irregulars 2.0″????
some of us split our time wasting between PK and FB and wanted to consolidate the efforts. we’re time wasting efficiently-ish.
(also, i was indicated that while FB is a giant waste of time, i partake in this giant waste of time far FAR too much)
*ahem* Also, Mina, clearly you need to join my Mafia and vice versa. Just saying.
But of course! Just out of curiosity, is anyone here on Vampire Wars? It’s sad, my clan consists of 3 and I get pwned everytime I try to fight. I almost cried last time.
I’m not; I’m on Street Racing, if you do that. Is VW any good?
It’s interesting. I’ve only joined MW & VW a few days ago and I’m already hooked. VW is set up similar to MW. Never heard of Street Racing. That one any good?
It’s similar, but fun in that you get to own and race cool cars. Rather than fighting people, you race them; the results are more or less dependent on the stats of your main car and how many points you’ve used for your racing abilities, offensive and defensive. With a crew race it depends on the size of your crew, too (like what you were talking about in VW).
I might have to look into that one.
bitter troll has some on his bitter myspace. dont use the facebook.
I did not realize there was such a thing. I will join as soon as I get home from work. For some reason PK is not blocked but FB is. Go figure.
Both are good for wasting time.
“For some reason PK is not blocked but FB is”
I have the same situation.
I can’t get to LOLrazzi here either. I can go to all the other LOL sights affiliated with PK, but not that one. It’s just another reminder that Big Brother has no sense of humor.
*puts hand over camera*
Of course Big Brother has a sense of humor. *shakes head and mouths “no”* Look, BB is laughing right now as the storm troopers enter your workplace looking for you. BB thinks it’s hilarious how surprised you are at being taken away in handcuffs! See, great sense of humor!
*snickers* I just had to tell my first year students to set a timer when on facebook or video games. Otherwise they were probably going to fail the rest of their tests in my course! (average grade 68%…AFTER the curve).
I was going to be a smart ass and just disappear from PK after I read this. But that’s no fun for me. So instead I will just inform you that I managed to escape and am now hidden in my secret underground bunker until I can get new documents printed up.
How does one join “the PK irregulars 2.0″ on FB?
Go to FB, search groups for “PK Irregulars 2.0″ and send us a group request. You’ll just need to confirm your PK name to an admin (there’s several of us) and then you’re in.
what diss said. mina should do it too. we need a few more of the “normal” PKers to unite outside of PK.
Normal? Bite your tongue!
Normal? I just might have to go cancel my request! LOL
Well, she did put it in quotation marks. I don’t think any of us qualify as quite normal.
i used “normal” to delineate us as the non troll-y regulars. there are some folk here ALL the time but they are definitely trolls.
and there’s no way any of us would qualify as normal in real society. we spend all day here talking politics and yelling at each other.
*facepalm* diss.. Now that people know how the screening process works, they’ll be onto us!
pr0n.
i think this is a female… which at teenager ages usually doesn’t indicate usage of porn… however it would indicate massive amounts of “tweets” about ‘the cute boy in my bio class. omg he sat next to me! squee!” an overabundance of facebook activity and friended every musician who ever existed on myspace then claiming to have 8551946 “friends”.
yeah. I guess they are already at the “giving blowjobs for popularity” stage by then. Porn is outdated.
But seriously though, I used to know girls in my HS with bigger pr0n collections that I had.
and where can bitter troll find these girls?
In VNV’s imagination. Or your nearest cheerleading team.
If you want a good time, find a band chick. Oh the things I could tell you about what happened on those bus rides to the games.
tell us bout that one time in band camp…
my bus was the saxophone, mellophone bus… and we always caused trouble. but then again, i was the bus captain, i’m sure that didn’t help.
note: yes we only had 2 sections on an entire bus. it took 9 busses to get our MB to the game. 2 for our flag girls, 1 for cheerleaders, 4 for the football team and we had an old bus that we painted black with the school mascot on the side that hauled all the equipment. so when we rolled up to a game with 16 busses and a giant bus-o-death it was pretty impressive.
If I recall correctly, teenage girl porn (I really hope having those three words together doesn’t get me targeted by Chris Hansen!) is generally the “sexier” romance novels. The ones with the picture on the cover of the burly cowboy or pirate or gentleman-farmer with the scantily-dressed heroine swooning away in his musclular, sweatily-glistening arms.
Notes that of course this was pre-internet….hell, pre-cable!
But alas, not pre-Eddie..
Turn yourself on in that last sentence did ya? Kept going on and on… and then I saw the word “glistening”. Cold shower time!
Lol…I actually could write that crap quite easily (it’s no more challenging than regular porn, plotwise!) but I’d have to buy soooo much Mylanta I’m not sure it would be worth what I’d make from the publishing rights.
Write a lot of regular porn then? Heck, sounds like you need my e-mail address!
i actually think current teenage girl porn consists entirely and exclusively of the twilight saga… just saying.
I was thinking that too. And that makes me fear for the future as well.
Don’t forget the heaving bosoms.
NEVER forget the heaving bosoms.
-remembers the heaving bosoms- mmmmm heaving goodness
*heaves*
*sighs. vigorously*
*comes rejoicing, bringing in the heaves*
*faints*
-breaks out his bitter camera- charro come heave with the others!…stand under the sprinklers…
*strolls around the corner sipping a soda into the sight of the heaving ladies*
Hmmm
*takes a sip of his soda*
Charlie! Cmere man! You gotta see this! Eddie! You too!
*slowly unbuttons blouse*
Oh dear it seems I forgot to wear a bra…
*drops shirt to floor*
When I said ‘heaves’ I meant as in hurls, horks, pukes, barfs, blow chunks, spews, you know, heaves.
*OGLES*
Pervs.
Please SB, don’t be a buzzkill.. sometimes we hasta perv..
Oh, fine.
*heaves…bosom*
Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.. that’s what I’m talkin’ about!
Men are so complex.
Suggestion #2: If you really, genuinely can’t puzzle out “ridiculous” well enough to look up the correct spelling, use a synonym (another word with the same meaning) that you CAN spell.
rataded? sally? funeh? fulish? damb? bizzared?
i both hate you and love you right now… i’m not sure which is going to win out.
Well I am both sad and happy about that. I will let you know as it develops. haha!
Maybe stoopit?
what’s sad is “rataded” and “stoopit” are both phonetically correct with some of the people i’ve come across..
only if you’re from bahstan.
If you get “Amtrack” poisoning in East Harlem (NY) you’ll look like you’ve come down with “chicken pops.”
i’d almost believe that there really was an amtrak poisoning. some of the trains that used to come through my college town looked awfully skeevy.
Jus don axe me, k?
Lizzy Borden?
im sorry, you have reached the end of the internet.
please turn off your computer and go outside
What if you’re outside on the computer?
then go inside..
Nope, can’t smoke inside. Must stay outside with the mini vampires.
F*ck that man! There’s BEES out there!!
Pfft. I’m busy playing with my Play Outside Facebook game. Outside is for chumps.
And BEES!
And…um…bees?
BEES?!
Can’t go with you. Too many bees.
cant stop here…this is bat country
I love the Jonas Brothers. They’re good role models, they sing really well, write their own music, and are very modest. I don’t understand where all of the hate comes from. Is it because they’re clean? Or because they’re so popular? I just don’t understand. Has anyone actually LISTENED to their music or just shoved it away because “Oh it’s them, they suck because they’re with Disney.”??