we heared you want
we heared you want your cat bathed?
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Picture by: RotemTW Caption by: Chris10a via Advanced Lol Builder
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misspelled.
unfunny.
about cats.
i don’t like this new PK standard.
me neither, but i’ll have to cope with it since i’m banned everywhere else.
judging from the shitstorm you’re brewing up with VNV back one LOL i’m not too surprised.
for clarification: i agree with you that VNV is an asshole… especially about the military and their occupation of iraq. however, the “i know you are but what am i” argument that you and wicket have been having with him only serves to make you both look even more asinine than VNV. i’d suggest coming up with a coherent argument to prove your viewpoint, but VNV’s never strayed from his view in the entire time he’s been around. i thoroughly gave up on him about 2 weeks ago when he said (and i’m paraphrasing) that being in the military gave people an excuse to murder other people. if you wanna last around here… back out of that argument and avoid it like the plague. he’s never going to agree with you and you’re never going to agree with him. none of us want to see the same fight that so many others have had with him.
Hmm, i don’t know if you really read my comments on the last LOL. It’s wicket who’s been arguing with VNV, whilst I was just amusing myself to post crap between their comments. I usually don’t bother to argue with anyone.
shortright’s point stands. Stay the hell out of it for your own good. That whole section is just irritating.
Whoaaa, guess I noticed what you mean, it’s really started now on the last LOL. I’ve retreated just in time.
I believe being in the army gives people an excuse to murder other people, what do you guys think?
I am *so* gonna reach through my modem and kick your ass for that. At least I would if your post weren’t funnier than the picture.
Pheeew! You had me afraid there! I was staring at my modem expecting a foot to come out any moment. But just so you know: My picture is funny!!!
No, I meant the LOL picture. Only Chuck Norris can send a roundhouse kick via modem.
Chuck Norris doesn’t need a modem to send a roundhouse kick through a modem.
All the while slamming a revolving door.
Damn I missed a shitstorm? Crikey.
my apologies. I meant to make a brief zinger, and it just unrolled into something much messier than I had expected. i truly am sorry if i screwed the last Lol up.
No worries, wicket.. you will notice that those who have been around here for awhile pretty much backed out and let other’s beat the crap out of each other. The sad part is, it wasn’t even worth the cost of the bandwidth to read..
Not even close. It was way too early (here in the midwest) to put up with that kind of crap. This is my day off, dammit, I want to relax today! LOL
Dude I missed a good ass kickin?!
*grabs his herring*
Stealth herring attack after the fact INCOMING!!!
No, it wasn’t. It was sad, boring, and drawn out. *sigh*
All the more reason!
*whacks Rando with a herring*
SEE!? Happier, More Interesting, and Shorter already!
*backs away slowly*
See?
Oh Max.. I have this cucumber..
I know. I am done too. It is, as we say in my household, without fruit. To explain, my 6th grader many years ago wrote a paper that was clearly plagerized from something she found on the internet. We asked her what fruitless meant. Her response….without fruit? Ahhh one of those priceless memories of having children that I will have forever.
You know what scares me? You can put “many years ago” and “the internet” in the same sentence now. I can remember the first time my family dialed up to AOL in the nineties. Seems like just yesterday.
i remember having dial up JUNO… remember that crap??
CompuServe. Anyone remember that one?
I remember both, and getting a $2300 bill from Compuserve. I was 16 and thought my dad was going to kill me. Fortunately, some movie also had some kid getting ripped off, so he let me slide on that one.
Anyone else the SYSOP of a BBS?
I remember using Netzero when it was free. *sigh*
I remember using a Vic20 with a tape recorder and the television screen–but I’m almost as old as Eddie the founding Floydist! We had to use TYPEWRITERS for our college papers! Thank all forms of goodness that laptops were around by dissertation time…although mine at that point was a dual floppy-drive with no C drive!
We had a portable Remington in our house and my dad always insisted we type any reports or essays we did for school. And since I was horrible at spelling and punctuation, we kept an economy size bottle of White Out handy.
White out is proof that there is a God!
I did a paper in HS on an old Royal. The “o” would punch right through the paper. Good times…
I learned to type on an IBM Selectric and learned how to make DOS sit up and bark on an old Apple Macintosh with the green screen……
I had an amiga with 2 floppys and no hard drive.
I started with a TI-994a, and no tape drive. And I still remember doing book reports for school on an old Royal typewriter. The first time I saw an IBM Selectric, it was in my dad’s office on base, and I thought it was a fine example of the military having leading technology. Then I found out I could type faster than it could keep up, and giggled like the little boy I was at the time.
Vaguely. I remember a couple other dial up services that AOL eventually ate and crapped out a few hours later, like Prodigy or something. A couple others. What alarms me is that some people still use dial up. Is it possible to actually USE the Internet that way?????
i know someone who is still on juno. it’s sooooo archaic. i tell her she ought to just give her LOG IN CD to the smithsonian.
remember those things?! when you had to put in the CD before the dial up would even go?
or do you remember the 5″ floppies??? we had an awesome commodore 64 with a joystick that we could hook up to the TV and play space invaders on. sometimes you could type things too, but saving it was a bitch because you could only save about 2 lines of text on those disks. 3 1/2″ floppies were only marginally better.
I think I still have a 3 1/2″ floppy somewhere. Don’t know what’s on it. I used to have a number of games for the Commodore 64 as a kid. Nothing particularly fun, though. I remember learning basic on that thing.
Who else got a Wang and couldn’t stop giggling about it?
i just caught that. dammit pitty… now i can’t stop giggling about it.
Where’s the report?!
It’s in the Wang, but I can’t get it out! The Wang’s not working! Call the Wang guy, the Wangs are down again …
if rando doesn’t know where his 3 1/2″ floppy is or what (who) is on it… he might have a larger issue than not being able to get the report.
It used to crack me up to see classified ads seeking a secretary who could work with a Wang.
Leave my floppy disk out of this.
i have a stack of 3 1/2″ floppies in the computer room. i’m pretty sure half of them are blank. but i won’t throw them out because they make good coasters.
They are not *ahem* floppies! WHARGABELELERERWER!
They ARE Diskettes.
fiiiiiiiiine. i’ll use the right terminology.
That is NOT a FLOPPY disk! That’s my HARD drive, dammit!!
fiiiiiiiiine. i’ll use the right terminology.
*nods*
if you say so rando…
*whispers to pitty*
we’re still calling it a floppy disk, right?
I don’t have any floppy disks anymore. I have a hard drive on my laptop and…that sounds really bad doesn’t it?
*having a fit of giggles*
yes rando, that does sound really bad.
Does it sound good when I say it, sweetness? *wiggles eyebrows*
ivan darling… of course it does. *jiggles boobs*
*brain locks up*
So should we name our thumb drives ’stick drives’?! ;p
I dunno… but I wanna find this Tara and figure out why she keeps biting hard drives! That’s just MEAN!
Oh, you mean the 5 1/4″ frisbees? If you bent the corners just right, you could nail an opponent from 50 feet away!
Dang! I must have hung out with the wrong crowd then!
I kept wondering why the diskette was getting bigger…… and then it hit me!
OMG, I was just thinking about that. I’m still convinced to this day that Juno is/was the devil.
Many as in 8 years lol. It is all relative
Yeah, I know. But we’ve all been surfing the ‘net for 15+ years now. Has it been that long?
I remember cleaning out my shed about 8 years ago and my 5 year old asked me what a record was lol. I had a whole box of them and she had no idea what they were.
My first LP, like many of my generation, was Thriller. My 2nd LP was Beatles 20 Greatest Hits. I’m sure my dad still has some LPs somewhere. Possibly the copy of Revolver we got him for his birthday one year.
Several years ago i was going through my fathers LP collection, and I found an unopened Thriller album. I wonder if it’s worth any money, just because it’s still in it’s original sealed packaging.
especially now that MJ’s croaked… i’m sure that’s worth a few bucks. i’d check on ebay and see what unopened thriller LPs are going for.
if you’re willing to part with it you might be able to make a pretty penny.
He didn’t croak he was muuuurrrrrdderrdedeeeerrrrrdddddd
ebay prices range from $75 all the way to $2000 buy it now. Crazy. Maybe I should put it up.
I know a man who believe that MJ cloned himself and it was THE CLONE who died so everyone would think MJ was dead and he could have(even more) plastic surgery to run off to Brazil or somewhere and live the rest of his life out of the public’s view.
This man also predicted that six months after the clone died MJ’s children would mysteriously vanish in order to go live with their dad.
When I asked him if MJ was hiding out with Elvis and Bigfoot for the time being he stuttered about how I was a real funny person and walked away.
I think Elvis was waiting for MJ at the Pearly Gates. Where Elvis got the brass knuckles in heaven is anyone’s guess.
Well he’s Elvis I suppose the angels were willing to bend certain rules for the King…
Ribbit
My first LP was Candy Land, lol. The first I actually saved my allowance for was Boney M, Nightflight to Venus. Let me note that I was 8 at the time, and in Germany.
Who and what?
Can’t find a clear version, as there are MAJOR copyright fights going on. Boney M was one of the first groups that Frank Farian put together. (Think Milli Vanilli)
They were a German group, made up of several different nations. Farian actually did the male voices, but used the group as a front. The lead singer is totally top notch, and was really held back by Farian.
I grew up in Germany in the 70’s, and this was one of THE big hits in 78.
The link is a disco-pop remix that kinda kills it. If I can find a fresh copy of the original, I’ll post it sometime. Farian keeps pulling it, wanting money.
Candy Land was an actual LP made to go along with said game. Heavy with Sammy Davis Jr “Candy Man.”
Buuahahahaha!! Boney M! What a flashback! My mom would pay HUGE money for Boney M bootleg tapes back in the USSR.
RA RA Rusputin…… Now there’s a cat that really was gone……. Oh, those Russians……
Wow… that’s abstract.. my first LP was Jefferson Starship…..
Cause… I wanted somebody to love… no I NEEDED somebody to love…
LOL!!!!!!!!! I remember 300 baud modems that had the couplers for the old style phones.
you probably remember party line phones too… because you’re sooooooo old.
Party lines, no, but rotary dial phones were all we had when I was little!
I remember when touch tone phones first came out.. or even better, simulated touch tone phones. You would dial the number and listen while it made the same sound as a rotary. And I bet a lot of people here don’t remember businesses that had on their opening messages, “If you are using a touch tone phone, please press 1 now. Otherwise stay on the line and someone will be with you shortly.” Even though I had a touch tone phone, I never pressed 1. I usually got through quicker..
there are businesses that STILL have the “press 1 if you’re using a touch tone phone” and i really have to wonder about the 6 people in all of america who aren’t using a touch tone phone yet.
although you’re a lot more likely to come across “press 1 for english” now-a-days… but that’s a whole different can of worms.
I want to hear “press 1 for english; press 2 for somebody who actually SPEAKS understandable english ” Then they can go on and have the 3 for spanish, 4 for khmer, or whatever.
i would press 2 until the button fell off the phone. i hate calling tech support and getting someone who CLEARLY does not speak english who tells me their name is “joe” and then when i ask for someone who speaks english as their first language he tells me that he does speak english as a first language. BULLSHIT! your name is like 70 characters long with 4 vowels in the whole thing and you learned english a week and a half ago and the only phrases you learned were “hello my name is joe”, “did you try to reboot the computer”, “try that for me now”, “that is not under warranty”, “i can not help you”.
Whenever someone complains about tech support from India (or wherever) I have to post a link to Foamy the Squirrel’s Tech Support rant
{link}
mark – thank you thank you thank you. that’s exactly what i mean. and i haven’t seen foamy in years.
my church had one of those up until a few years ago. i think it was only there to discourage people from actually using it. took forever to dial my home phone number (lots of 9’s).
Those things were a bitch to use if you had a sore index finger…and as a basketball player, I had a few of those before we went touch-tone.
I also remember being in awe when Windows originally came out. After staring at Dos for so long, the colors were mesmerizing. And marveling at this “mouse thing”. *sigh*
I remember using WordPerfect 5.0 (for DOS) and when Word came out for Windows, everyone in my department poo poo’ed it to no end. Where’s WordPerfect now?
On my computers at home and work, Eddie. I was always a Word person until about 7 years ago, when I started at this office. They used WordPerfect, and I was almost instantly converted. I like it a lot better. For one thing, I never have some stupid animated paperclip asking me if I need help writing a letter. I think the current version is 13, although my computer’s running 12.
I remember when Novell bought WordPerfect, what a fiasco! When their bottom line started suffering, they dumped it and it was limbo for a few years until someone else bought it, but I can’t remember who.
It’s Corel now.
I bought a rotary dial kitchen wall phone from a yard sale, just so my kids would know what it was like. That and it makes the BEST ringer. You can hear that thing a block away. And the sound quality is 10 times better than any crap Radio Shack or Wal Mart sells today.
As a matter of fact, I do.. and I remember that where I lived we only had to dial 5 numbers as everyone had the same first two numbers. I remember ads that had for exampe, WH3- 1212 (WH stood for White Hall, or 94 if you look at your phone.)
Damn, I’m old… *sniffs*
*hugs*
it’s ok. you’re our resident old fogie. we like you just the way you are.
Awwww, thanks shorty.. at least I can keep up when you guys start talking new fangled technology..
I had started using AOL back when it used to be “taken down for service” at like 3:00 a.m. Ah, the good old days when I couldn’t stay up all night messing about on the internet mostly because there was nothing to do.
Except cyber with other teenagers. That’s what I did anyway.
You dirty, dirty person…
AOL.. I still have the same SN I did when I was 15… Hahaha I have a SN almost as old as Tygor…
Oh dial up. How did we ever put up with your garbage!
Back then, it didn’t seem that bad. There’s nothing worse than downgrading to dial-up though. I’ve had to do that in the past when money was tight, and it was a fvcking nightmare. Takes an hour to pirate…er…download a song instead of 10 seconds.
and that my friends is why you should all have comcast
Agreed. This page was not made for the cat people.
FondleGropes shortright’s lady lumps for entertainment, with the hopes of stirring up some entertaining drama.
The Steve… you’re going to have to check with Ivan to see if that’s ok. he’s kinda called dibs on my tits… i’d hate to start a fight. there’s plenty of boobs for everyone!
…EXCEPT TYGOR!
And Rando, but he’s already set with Mrs. Rando, so it’s aaaallll riiiiight.
*motorboats in shortrights cleavage, leaves post-it note Thank-U for Ivan*
Bounces away cheerfully.
Now THAT’S polite.
Will this be a group grope? *pants hopefully*
you have to wait your turn… but you can get a feel too.
Wow, the girls sure are friendly around here. Let me have a feel…huh, wait, 6 of them…oh shit that’s bitter troll!!! *pukes in the corner*
i’m gonna tell mrs. rando!
What did I tell you about stalking my wife? You guys scare her. LOL
*stomps away*
she stalked us first…
*entertains troubling image of Romulus and Rando nursed back to health by the fox god Bitter Troll*
Whew! A bit more than merely troubling. Brrrr.
Why do I always miss the boob feeling. So sad.
NO IT’S NOT OK!! *grabs the lady lumps from The Steve’s groping hands* MINE!!!
now, now… don’t you believe in sharing your toys? The Steve is a friend, you can share with him.
Well, ok. But just for a minute! And he better not mark ‘em up!
yah rly
I believe this is a case where ICHC corrupted the creator. I’ve got my self asking if I could has all too often.
First!
Suck it, Igor!
you fail so spectacularly.
and here is your random information:
Star in the Dust (also released as Law Man) is a 1956 American western film made by Universal International Pictures and starring John Agar, Mamie Van Doren and Richard Boone.
The Sheriff of Gunlock is due to hang Sam Hall for cattle-stealing. He has to contend, however, with various different citizens, including the cowboys who want to rescue him and the cattle-farmers who want to lynch him. Hall, meanwhile, is planning his escape with his girlfriend Nellie.[1]
The film is probably most notable today for marking an early appearance of Clint Eastwood, although he played a very small role as a ranch hand.
Clint also hat a bit part in the third Creature From the Black Lagoon film. (Was it Revenge of the Creature?) He’s the lab tech who finds the missing mouse in his pocket.
Trolling a teenager is a massive, complete life fail. Please hold your breath until further notice.
Better yet, why don’t just turn that gal in the previous lol on him. I bet she could kick this person’s ass in 30 seconds flat.
“heard” not “heared”
here’d that!
heared today, goned tomorrow.
in one heared and out the othered
FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL!!!!!!!
Too many fails to even type.
Someone post this on Failblog.
Why can’t the ICHC people stay in the baby pool where they belong? Don’t decide our LOLs for us!!
Of course I’ve heard of cats.
but have you heared them?
Both spelling AND grammar fail. I mean what’s with the question mark? Are they making a statement or asking a question? Are they asking if they “heared” about it, because they’re just not sure if they “heared” it correctly?
Low ranked. Next time, pay attention in English class.
I came here to lol
Saw this caption
Sighed “Oh well…”
Who here agrees,
This caption’s a fail?
That seems to be the consensus. I wish the people who actually voted win on this one would come here and tell us WHY this crap is FUNNY to them.
They all like cats and thought the idea of bathing one was funny?
I have actually had to wash a cat before(oil in his fur, no I don’t know how it got there) and while I thought it was going to be all flying fur and bloodied arms he actually didn’t scratch me or put up that much of a fight.
Quite disappointing really cause I got all charged up for nothing.
I’ve been ripped to shreds by one of my cats who touches water and can suddenly climb a tile wall like Spider-Man. I’m also allergic to cats, so my poor bloodied arms swelled up nice and itchy too. My wife wonders why I won’t bathe the cats more often.
Awww that sucks. Depends on the cat I suppose. All mine really did was make pitiful meows and try to climb out of the tub.
My other cat did that, but he’s old, fat, and isn’t particularly quick. So he’s given up on that stuff. And unlike the other two, he’s declawed. I still get itchy and have to shower right after his bath or I end up miserable for the rest of the day.
You’re allergic to cats, yet you own
(more than) one?
I like cats.
You know, as long as I don’t huff their dander or bathe in cat stew (aka, the bathtub after they’ve had their bath), I’m generally okay. I only pet them for a little at a time. It seems I “get used to” them.
I’ve read that living with cats (or dogs) keeps you from becoming REALLY allergic to them. Kind of like purring allergy shots!
i’m going to ship you my cat (i’ll put airholes in the box)… she needs a bath. and at 7lbs and no claws on her front feet it still takes 2 of us to get her bathed.
mine had skin problems so i had to shampoo her quite often. All she did was just sit in the tub and do the whine meow thing.
At least it’s not troll fodder…i mean what would they argue about?
Oh I don’t know I reckon a troll can argue over just about anything. :\ I mean that’s the only thing the know how to do is argue.
But you’re right this picture is pretty poor fodder for a normal troll.
Just wait. They always find a way.
“This is terrible! First of all, that poor cat’s rights are being violated horribly. If it wanted a bath, it would let you know. And you shouldn’t be forcing animals to be your pets anyway, it’s like SLAVERY. Plus, those guys are mindless violent tools of the military-industrial complex. And their uniforms are not ecologically friendly.” [/trolling]
VNV: The military is coming to murder the cat in their baths.
MUUUUUUURRRRDDDDEEEERRR!!!11!!!!!!!elebenty!
THOSE CATS ARE INNOCENT CIVILIANS! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WOULD MURDER THEM! YOU’RE A HORRIBLE PERSON! YOU’RE JUST A SOLDIER SO YOU CAN MURDER PEOPLE!
/vnv
I READ ABOUT HOW CATS HAVE BEEN HISTORICALLY TREATED POORLY IN BOOKS SO I KNOW WAY MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER POSSIBLY KNOW ON THE SUBJECT! I READ BOOKS.
/vnv (i think i’m done now… maybe)
Cats build wooden houses, you know. Speciesist.
CATS MAKE TOO MUCH MONEY. WE NEED A SALARY CAP SO THAT NO CAT MAKES TOO MUCH MONEY AND WE CAN PROVIDE LITTER BOXES AND CAT NIP TREATS TO ALL THE CATS IN THE WORLD. IF THOSE DAMNED BILLIONAIRE CATS ONLY SHARED THE LITTER THERE WOULDN’T BE ANY IMPOVERISHED CATS IN THE WORLD.
AND THEY DON’T LIVE IN WOOD HOUSES. THEY DON’T HAVE THUMBS YOU IDIOT. THEY CAN’T BUILD HOUSES. GOD, YOU’RE ALL MORONS. DON’T YOU KNOW ANYTHING? YOU NEED TO READ BOOKS ALL DAY LIKE I DO. THEN YOU’LL BE SMART AND GOOD LOOKING AND HAVE A GIANT WANG AND ALL THE GIRLS WILL WANT YOU UNTIL THEY FIGURE OUT YOU’RE AN INTOLERANT INSUFFERABLE ASSHOLE WITH A WANG SMALLER THAN A COCKTAIL WEENIE OUT OF A CAN.
/vnv (ok, i really do think i’m done now.)
*snort* okay that was pretty awesome (the whole mess of trolling)
I think you just melded VNV with NO_MO_BAMA. (I still don’t know what that kid has against Alabama. Maybe he’s an Auburn fan.)
I always just assumed NO_MO_BAMA had a scarring experience with jam.
hilariously well put. kudos.
@ rando and diss – what part was no_mo-ish? i really have managed to ignore him recently so i wasn’t trying to troll him. maybe if i know what i did i could start trolling him just for fun. trolling as VNV was more fun than it should have been… i’m sure no_mo could be fun too!
@ shortright: I dunno, the all-caps?
I didn’t really say it reminded me of him, though, that was Rando.
Why’s that kid talking smack about Alabama? I haven’t noticed it. I guess it’s pretty standard at this point.
At least it’s not Mississippi
Of course it’s a fail. Every single caption on every section of the board is a fail. I’ve never seen so much misery on a website devoted to comedy.
Wow, sounds rough. Maybe you should try a different website.
Rando, before s/he leaves, could kick their ass just on general principles, please?
Heared?
WTF. Do they even teach spelling in school these days?
no.
i tried to come up with a way to misspell that, just to annoy you, but my brain hurt. so i didn’t.
Heared….for some reason reminds me of the use of “havening” in the helpdesk tickets on this website.
It makes me think it’s like a status. Follow me on this odd mind journey…So someone is making a speech and makes a good point, the audience call out “hear hear” (I never learned which spelling that it really is) so that point has a “heared” status of agreement
Noe?
Those guys can come bathe my cat anytime. My dog, too. Oh, and vacuum the animal hair out of my house. And wash the dishes, they’re really piling up. Something needs to be thawed for dinner and the dust bunnies under my bed are breeding again.
Hop to it, people!!
my house is second on the list. and while you’re bathing the dogs… make sure to get the skunk smell off the border collie.
well said!
I’ve got laundry. Lots and lots of it. All the fall clothes need to be washed, and someone needs to pick out the clothes the kids have outgrown. Mach schnell!!!
Slavery: Get shit done!
I’m pretty sure that’s German riot police – looks exactly like their gear. And if I had to guess then I’d say they’re guarding one of those amazingly unpopular nuclear waste transports.
YAY! Someone knows (maybe) what’s going on in the picture!
Oh, and we are all very very very old people. I was going to mention something about 8-tracks up yonder in this thread, but thought the better of it.
This is one of those “so bad it’s funny” situations for many reasons.
Whoever wrote the caption should probably kill themself.
Yikes! That’s taking things a bit to far, I was thinking they should just stop making lols…
Ok. That sounds like a decent compromise.
While grossly misspelled, I work at a cat only veterinary hospital and I can say with authority that we would love to have gear like that for some of the patients we have to groom. Nothing like fishing a cat out from under a bank of cages with a fishing net as it’s tryping to attack your face.
“Does your cat make too much noise? Try Kitten Mittens!! ™”
That’s a link by the way.
giving a cat a bath is absolutely cruel. they’re self cleaning! i’m totally opposed to ANYONE who washes their cat and believe that such people should be shot in the face
Oh. That kind of “truth”, eh?
It’s ok, they feel the same about you.
bathing is for the weak
TOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!1!!!!!11!!!
bitter troll likes cookie monster better
Yeah, until he got type-2 diabetes for eating nothing but cookies his entire life. Poor sap.
these are the greek riot police. the picture must be from the december 2008 riots