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When you think threatening to nuke Hawaii is going to make the Hawaiian-born President go easy on you.
(Kim Jong-Il)
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You mean African born…AMIRITE?
I think it’s funny that you guys still believe that. Srsly, it’s even more “special” than this lol…
Maybe it was the effects of a late night last night, but for a second when I read this I was like, “Who? Hawaii doesn’t have their own president, do they?” I’m an idiot.
Its Kim, he has that effect on people, muddles the brain, makes them think and do things that could get them and their country wiped off the map. Or in your case hindered your reading comprehension…
*GASP* If he has this power over teachers…. what hope do the rest of us have?! OH GOD!!!
*runs for his underground bunker*
It’s summer vacation. I don’t have to be smart until September.
But if you do that… the terrorists win Jane!
If not thinking means the terrorists win, then we’re all in trouble.
We can’t let the terrorists have Jane! She would become their secret weapon!
Sweet!
Don’t be silly Jane. You’re already my secret weapon.
If you go over to the terrorists, you’ll be costing the military 5.43 billion in wasted expenditures. Sheesh, do you know how much time I SPENT turning you into a cyborg?
When you turn me into a cyborg, do I get to look like Summer Glau?
Only if you want to.
However, you already ARE a cyborg. Do you need nanotechnology improvements to help your self-confidence or are you fine without new nano-implants?
Why is a good little teacher up at one in the morning?
Summer Vacay! I have nothing to get up for tomorrow. I start summer classes on Tuesday though, so I’ll have to get up early at least two days a week.
Oh righhhhttt… I’ll be sure to bother you more then!
Did you realize you’re exactly half of VG’s age, Janie?
I did not know this about VG and myself.
I think I should get tested, Jane. I just did *math*. In my *head*. On summer vacation…. Damnit, I’m a freak. Do math teachers even do that?
Is this where I point out that experience and treachery will win out over youth and beauty?
No, instead of that…
Hey Jane! How about you and I join together and take over the world? We’ve got both brains and breasts–the two most powerful weapons in existence!
… Can I be the man-slave?
I think this is a plan. Not even Putin will be able to defeat that powerful combination of weaponry. *Evil Laugh*
Oooh, and in arrogance lies our downfall, Jane. He was part of the KGB, trained not to get distracted by terrific breasts and intelligent women. And he has a sniper rifle. We need the Tyler-dog sprinting around the palace on watch at all times.
The KGB may have trained Putin…but he is still a heterosexual male. So he will be pwnd!
*flips on his Darth Vader breather*
The power to destroy planets is insignifigant when compared with the power of breasts/brains…
*flips off his Darth Vader breather*
No for serious…. it really is…
We can’t let the People’s Breasts fall into the wrong hands! Wait, that doesn’t sound very good.
Eric, help me and Eddie bash trolls? We’re having an event over the next few days.
***Goes under the closest bridge*** Nope no trolls here!!!! Who’s got the Billy Goat GRuffs?
hey get out of bitter troll’s room!
Tosses Eric a SAW.. c’mon..
No it doesn’t. The People’s Breasts do not like it when they are in the wrong hands!
-Giggles and winks-
Thanks, Jane. Reading Pratchett’s “Night Watch”, I just read “Even so, oxen had powerful breasts.” instead of “Even so, oxen were powerful beasts.” Grr >.<
I’m not sure that’s something Pratchett wouldn’t write.
True. I’ll have to go back and double-check when I can see properly. Now every other word looks like boobies to me.
See, now it’s an even better read. I think I actually am going to trundle off to bed now. G’night!
Nighty night, teacherlady.
Boobies!!!!! So wait does that mean people can’t use their “right” hands on breasts anymore? (I know bad pun **Holds head in shame**)
Is there a bad pun in existence which involves breasts? No, I didn’t think so!
Mostly because in 45 states, they’d be illegal.
Breasts make everything better.
You’re pretty fucking special, Carl, if you really think that.
no, you’re not.
Aw, how cute.
and he didn’t even do it either
Idiot.
Native Hawaiian
Cheeehuuuu!!! Kanaka Maoli all the way! Imua!
Obama is not going to do anything about it… he wants us to be more like N. Korea. UN sanctions don’t mean squat and no one cares about them.
Get your nuts! Get your hot nuts here!
Nothing like hot nuts on a Sunday morning….
*munches*
What?
Bitter troll is bitter.
You don’t really believe that, do you? No one could be that friggin’ stupid.
Wanna bet? There’s history here that supports this level of stupidity.
Pt Barnum was not wrong…..
He doesn’t want people to “go easy” on him, he wants people to FEAR AND OBEY him. Caption fail.
Its like poking a sleeping grizzly bear. At some point the thing is gonna get up and maul you.
I swear, when our army eventually gets back from Afghanistan, Iraq, and maybe Iran, we are gonna give you SUCH a pinch.
Win!
really? i would hope so. but from what i hear, the UN is all bark and no bite.
Ha ha ha! That slayed me!
I am stealing the second paragraph effective immediately, and posting it all over the damn internet. Beautiful.
Firstly obama was not born in hawaii. Second as Lewis Black has already said we will never go to war with the north koreans. They are evil in a way we cannot comprehend. How do we know this, because anytime we get photos or video from there its all in black and white, It’s not the film…these people are so evil they have no color. Besides which though many other countries have nukes these days NK is one of only a few that I think is crazy enough to use them.
DUMB@SS
Funny thing, his birth certificate says he WAS born in Hawaii. You pinheads prefer to ignore the proof. *shrug* Keep plugging your ears and saying “La-la-la-la!”
Hiz burth certifukit iz a fake!! He iz a muslin afircan!!!
Firstly, Obama WAS born in Hawaii, no matter how much you wish he wasn’t. Not only do you not have to like it, I hope your head explodes from the frustration, then we’d have one less idiot to deal with.
Don’t forget that NK is where flying monkeys come from. Just watched that same special yesterday. or day before. I forget and don’t care.
Oh, is that what they call them. I thought they were Rodongs, but flying monkeys works too (is this a CIA plot to see what we know and how much?)
Now I suddenly feel the need to watch the Wizard of Oz again…
Careful, too much ‘toto’ and you will start seeking green witches..
*hums ‘If I Only Had a Brain’*
‘If I only had a heart’
Now now, Eddie, you know us Conservatives dont’ have hearts….
*thumps chest – ting ting ting*
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Yeah, I know…
I sing that all the time. Ask Eddie and Eric, they’ll tell you that it’s one of those things I hope I get for Christmas. Hopefully they won’t tell you that I pray to Santa Claus.
According to sources, Tyler, you’re on the naughty list AGAIN. Better luck next year.
I was born naughty
And by the way, Eric, wouldn’t this result in a continuous loop? I mean, the fact that I don’t have a brain and the fact that I’m on the naughty list every year is a clear indicator that without a brain, I can’t act good enough to GET a brain.
You can buy one. I hear the Japanese are close to getting AI going.
I’ve been playing too much Halo lately. Hearing that makes me think “Oh cool, they can make Cortana.”
Um, so, ajohnson153, if I understand you correctly, lack of colour photography equals evil beyond comprehension? So that means that pre-1937 Hollywood was as evil as North Korea, yes?
Uhh YEAH!!! Charlie Chaplin was pure evil, just look at the mustache… who else had a mustache like that?!?! Coincidence, I think not!!! (For those new comers, please note Sarcasm, not calling CC Hitler…)
He said Hitler! I call Godwin!
Up and lead the dance of The Wang!
Lift the song that mortals hate!
Tell what rights are The Wang’s on earth,
Over all of human birth.
Swift of foot to avenge are wangs!
He whose hands are clean and pure,
Naught our wang to dread hath he;
Calm his cloudless days endure.
What? Can’t even do it in a sarcastic manner? **Stomps foot** You let me have NO FUN!!! What about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness…. you.. you… SUCK!!
Nigerian-born.
DUMB@SS 2
Citation?
Yeah, I’m with Ivan. The Obama haters love to scream that he’s not really American. But can any of them prove it? No, they can’t.
Eric: I hate Obama, but admit he’s a US Citizen, only a US Citizen can BREAK that many promises and LIE this much!!!! Plus his one damn good hypocrite, and and Americans are the best at being hypocritical!!!!
He’s probably the instigator of all those Nigerian scams too, right? Fscking troll..
No Eddie that’s me. It’s so easy picking on defensless Americans to get money. We have people who believe Obama’s not a US Citizen, and on the other spectrum we have people that believe Obama when he opens his mouth. This country is way too gullible NOT to CON!!
What the crap. If Obama was REALLY not born in this country, he would NOT be president. Get the hell over it. He’s president. Deal with it. If you don’t like it, vote him out of office in 2012.
and please, don’t let anyone who watches ‘american idle’ vote.
or at least make sure that they have a decent IQ
If he was REALLY born in this country, why does he R E F U S E to prove it? If someone asked for YOUR real birth certificate and you had nothing to hide, would you pay lawyers to hide it?
He hides his grades in the schools he didn’t deserve to go to also, gee, I wonder why?
I’ve seen the birth certificate, (well, a photo), it’s been presented to officials repeatedly… seriously, criticize his policies all you want, but this canard is just embarassing to your side.
When asked, Barack H. Obama, Jr., et al claims he was born in Honolulu, Hawaii however, claims to have been born in two (2) separate hospitals. According to Barack H. Obama’s Kenyan grandmother, Barack, Jr. was born in Mombosa, Kenya and she was present during his birth. The Kenyan Government, claim they have the birthing records of Barack H. Obama, Jr. and the birth delivery records of Ann Obama, from Barack H. Obama, Jr.’s birth in Mombosa, Kenya, however, they have sealed the birth records of Barack H. Obama, et al, birth in Mombosa, Kenya and labled them top secret as a result of the presidential election.
Oh right.. care to cite that?
Yeah, I’ve GOT to see the proof of this whack-job statement.
Based on NO MO’s other posts, I’m guessing this is what he comes up with when his medication wears off.
[http://www.obamacrimes.info/justthefacts.html]
I smell a blog.. and in response, try this one [http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/citizen.asp]
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For the record, I’m no ‘fan’ of Obama, but I really get tired of the contrived bullsh*t.
I know, right? Find one of the many real things to complain about, not the made up crap.
For instance, what’s the deal with Obama supporting secrecy in the White House records?!?
ObamaCrimes.info? Gosh! That’s GOT to be a completely unbiased source of impeccably reliable information without a single preconceived idea or agenda in sight! I shall rush — RUSH, I tell you — right over there and get “just the facts!”
or.. not.
And don’t forget to send in money so they can continue on with this frivolous crap!
Um, no need to be snide.
Someone asked for a link, and I offered it, ‘cuz I’d seen it.
Nice place.
Someone asked for a citation, not a completely biased, conspiracy-oriented internet article that ignores the proof and draws its conclusions entirely from word of mouth, and goes on to editorialize for its readers so they don’t need to think for themselves.
lol. i know! they might as well have cited wikipedia.
if anyone is going to cite something to back up their argument, it needs to be a relevant source with facts and an actual reputation, not some conspiracy site written by someone who lives in their mom’s basement.
Wikipedia is a more reputable source. It rarely has mistakes, and if it has a low number of citations, the article is automatically flagged. Anyway, it’s not like they have anyone allowed to write on it- they have special administrators working all day to fix any articles that a hacker happens to get into, but yeah, I’d not go to it for a political issue.
A citation is the origin of the source.
How is it that my fault, again?
You don’t know NO_MO_BAMA’s source, though. That’s the problem- if you’re not certain it’s where he got the information, then you shouldn’t link a biased site when people ask him to prove it.
It’s word for word. Duh.
Hmm… Good point. Only thing I can respond is this: A website that bad seems likely to copy and paste, IMO.
For the record, we do not use blogs as citations as those are merely someone’s idea or fantasy. If you have actual proof that can back it up, then use that. Not some drivel from a website that has it’s own agenda.
My point exactly. NO_MO_BAMA copied and pasted.
It wasn’t even an original thought in the first place.
Gina’s Mom, I mean- A site that bad seems likely to have copied and pasted the article in the first place.
However, I agree.
And Eddie, you’s a gorgeous man.
Tyler: Wikki’s can be wrong. Wikkipedia actually referred to the Solo twins as the elder of the Solo chidlren, MY GOD the travesty… luckily I fixed it for them.
If you want throw out tripe, expect a backlash. It’s not the place is ‘not nice’, it’s more like we have seen more than our fair share of people posting ‘information’ that is biased and slanted. You would do well to read through a few more posts asking for citations if you don’t get the drift.
Tripe? I cited the site that was the the word-for-word origin of NO_MO_BAMA’s post so you could see where it came from. I offered no opinion, positive or negative, I just posted an address.
How is this wrong, again?
Eddie, what time is it there, noon?
“If you want throw out tripe,” Cmon, I know you’re more awake than that
@Gina’s mom. By citing without comment, it appears that you are trying to support NO-MO’s statements, rather than simply showing where he got/plagiarized it from. And blogs are known to be less-than-reliable as sources of fact…
Viking Gal, don’t be silly! Blogs ALWAYS tell the truth! Especially the Roswell ones! OMG! How could you say something like that it’s horrible OMG!
/sarcasm off /vomiting on
No, what I did was show Eric the address where he went when off his medication to plagarize his original thought.
Oh, well.
Gina, did you even bother looking for other sources that would validate NO_MO_BAMA? No? Well I did and posted the link, did you bother to look at it? If you want to take the word of a site that has no factual sources to prove Obama is not a U.S. citizen, by all means go for it. But don’t be surprised when people point and laugh.
Don’t blame us because you didn’t explain yourself or where you were coming from. At all.
Ok, now I see where we’re going. Gina, if I’m wrong, I truly apologize. I thought you were trying to validate NO_MO_BAMA’s post.
Regardless, if a whole passel of people don’t understand where you’re coming from, chances are you didn’t explain yourself properly. We’re not mind readers.
Jane… We’re not… Yet.
I hear that soon, the ICHC creators will give us telepathic connections.
But not to the trolls.
Well, of course not the trolls, Tyler. Trying to read a troll’s mind would be like trying to read a book with no pages.
-Snort-
No, Eric, look below for my highly accurate explanation of The Origin of Trolls.
I could write a book.
And it would be like trying to read a book that’s made to look like a swordfish. Because the book you’re trying to read IS a swordfish.
Interestingly enough, but not surprising.. *crickets*
So why do the two largest papers in the city of Honolulu both have birth announcements from 1961 announcing “Mr. And Mrs. Barack H Obama” having a son? Oh and it doesn’t matter anyway. His mother was an American citizen. He could have been born on MARS and he still would have been a born an American citizen.
(In case you forgot…John McCain wasn’t born in this country either.)
Oh and if you want to see the *$&%*(ing thing just look it up on Google or Yahoo. It’s been plastered all over the internet since before the election…which you lost. SO GET OVER IT!
“So why do the two largest papers in the city of Honolulu both have birth announcements from 1961 announcing “Mr. And Mrs. Barack H Obama” having a son?”
That just proves how devious and well-planned the CNOSPIRACY is.
thanks, Kal, that’s actually what I was trying to post earlier today but we’ve been banned from blogs at work.. hehe (not my fault!!!)
;P
Let’s see… multiple government officials and verified official documents from government agencies in one of the most record-keeping countries in the world, — vs. — one elderly granny who doesn’t speak English and therefore is speaking through an interpreter about the birth of one of her (bare minimum) 9 grandkids more than 40 years ago.
Who shall I believe. I just can’t decide.
I keep promising myself I’m not going to get drawn in again (I already have two long comments that are awaiting moderation – don’t know why, I must have hit some keywords or maybe the length is excessive.* I have a lot of trouble with the concept of brevity, or giving up) but I can’t help it. This thought is keeping me from focusing on work. So:
For those who want to claim that the grandmother’s stated recollection of witnessing O’s birth in Kenya is a “smoking gun” and proof of the “deception,” let me ask this… and again, try to answer honestly.
Pretend it was reversed.
Pretend that the State Department, Obama, his relatives, the DNC, the campaigns, the State of Hawaii, all the FactCheck/Snopes-esque sites, EVERYONE said that he was born in Kenya. A Kenyan birth certificate was presented, which of course some people found suspicious-looking but the Kenyan government went public saying, “Yes, it’s correct, we certify that he was born in Kenya.”
And, off on the side, speaking *through an interpreter* about the birth of *one of many* grandchildren more than *40 years ago*, an elderly Sarah O says, “He was born in the US.”
Who would you believe? Would you take her word above all the officials and governments, and reluctantly admit that he was eligible to hold the office?
If you’re going to claim that the word of one person trumps all the government agencies and public officials and documents, because she’s a relative and she says she was an eyewitness, it has to work both ways – it can’t be only when that person agrees with your own agenda.
(I have no hopes that any of the trolls here will give this any thought. But maybe someone else can use the reasoning on a coworker, relative, friend… who might be a little less, you know, insane.)
*”The length is excessive” – yeah, that’s what she said!
::rimshot::
Racist!!! You just don’t like old African women, and are trusting the White man’s documents!!!! How dare you?!!? Obama would be ashamed.
” they have sealed the birth records of Barack H. Obama, et al, birth in Mombosa, Kenya and labled them top secret as a result of the presidential election.”
And yet you know this somehow. By reading it on the internet? Or do you have a special clearance to examine top secret Kenyan records?
Kid, you’re incredibly gullible. Incredibly. You might as well have just posted that you still believe in the Easter Bunny. You’re being led around by the nose, because you’re simply too docile to question what you’re told.
Well, it’s OBVIOUS that they’ve sealed the records – after all, no one’s ever seen them. I call that proof! What possible other explanation could there be?
(god, I hope I don’t have to point out that I’m being sarcastic…)
Because the absence of proof always means there’s a conspiracy afoot! I mean, look at this- I’ve never liked Sarah Palin. You can tell by my previous thread posts at PK.
However, the fact that you should take my word for my political opinion CLEARLY indicates that I’m secretly in love with Sarah Palin because I publicly declare that I dislike her! I mean, look at these top-secret records that I’ve never seen and you won’t get to either! Since they exist, they CLEARLY must be about my affair with Sarah!
“I’m secretly in love with Sarah Palin because I publicly declare that I dislike her!”
So, is that how you wind up in an opposite marriage?
Dude how can you dislike someone with that great a bare of legs!?!? You must be a Breast man…. I figured you for an Ass man!!!
Bear legs tend to be thick and hairy, and end in long pointy claws that can rip your flesh. Not my cuppa tea.
You’re referring to her Husband!!! Come on, the liberals are drooling over Tina Fey, but don’t they look exactly alike? I’d hit both of them, at the same time!!!
Not about her looks- she is attractive. It is about her itty bitty walnut, crybaby, incompetent, incomprehensible, ignorant brain.
I mean pair… ok spelling is horrible on my crack berry.
It’s true, I’m a breast man.
That I want them, of course, not that I have them.
*That I want HER to have them, not that I’m transgendered, is what I meant.*
…
Just as long as you remember Man Friend’s Rule No,1!
(Okay, so it’s not a very related picture, but I just stumbled across it and it’s so good it just needed to be shared)
Nice
It just wouldn’t be a proper cnospiracy if you could find proof of it.
Does not matter- his mother was an American Citizen- thus he is an American Citizen—even if you crack heads have nothing better to do then to try to make something out of this nothing (where were you when GB’s records from Vietnam era were coming to light?), then move on bc his MOM is American- thus he is AMERICAN—find something better to do with your time—like maybe take a class in logic, science, philosophy- ANYTHING—Heck watch TV—just stop watching Jerry Springer- it is killing you few brain cells.
I agree with NO_MO_BAMA… I mean because every knows that when you run for president and they ask for your credentials you can just say “Naw, thats ok.”, and walk away. They totally let you do that.
And of course when you run for president you’re required to post your personal information, including social security card so everyone can see your number, your address, your parents name and their address and know that its not fake.
And of course, when you apply to ivy league schools, they take in the under-wealthy, non-deserving students first, especially when they dont mark ethnic background.
And of course everybo- Wait a minute… this is all non-logical reverse thinking… I dont agree with you!
Politifact’s “Final Chapter” analysis linked to my name (hopefully).
And their follow-up released July 1st, this year, hopefully again linked behind my name.
Allow me to play retarded devil’s advocate…. “That burf sertificut dont have no sertificut numbur on it! It caint be reel!”
Wasn’t aware that our birth certificates were numbered (I’m walking around with the ghetto hospital original, not the fancy standard issue on embossed paper…which I can’t find right now. Uh oh).
The link attached is from factcheck.org and has close up photos of a birth certificate they obtained from the Obama campaign office in Chicago during August of 2008. They include photos of the certificate number, as well as the raised seal and registrar signature.
Like the article from Politifact said, if this is a forgery, it’s a damn good one and would require a lot of coordination from a lot of people. You may be a “Wag the Dog” style skeptic, Maxwell, but I’m not. I don’t think that many parts could pull of a scam this well.
Er, “that many moving parts could pull off a scam…” Should have just said “that many people.”
Should also include, for those not interested in reading the full story, the article states the State Department is satisified by the short-form version of the birth certificate, and does not require the long-form.
How many times can I reply to myself? Sorry about missing your “devil’s advocate”qualifier.
Please dont leave off the retarded part… thats the most important word in that sentence
LOL!
“If he was REALLY born in this country, why does he R E F U S E to prove it? If someone asked for YOUR real birth certificate and you had nothing to hide, would you pay lawyers to hide it?”
Nope, and neither did Obama.
Are you begging to have your freedom of speech quelled? If a person is not qualified to be President until he has stifled right-wingers’ lies, we will need to stifle right-wingers’ lies. Is that really what you guys want?
Accept reality, or go move into with Mr. North Korea nutcase there.
SOOOOO WHAT!!!!
What if he wasn’t born here? What difference would it make? His mother was born in the US. John Mccain was born in Panama…is he illegitimate too? I do not understand why you dolts persist with the birth certificate thing.
Because they knew that they had no chance on beating Obama on issues so like all good reich wingers do they fell into lockstep behind some idiot who said, “I have an idea!! What if we say that because his father was from Kenya he was born there and try to say he can’t be president that way?”
They’re groping at straws because their little far right ideological movement is collapsing around them and they have to lash out to make themselves feel better.
All of which is completely irrelevant now anyway. They lost the election. Obama is president. Whining about where he was born isn’t going to change that, so they can be in denial all they want. He’s still president. If he wasn’t American born, there’s no way the Republicans actually would have stood for him becoming the president. It would have been a huge deal, not some conspiracy theory thrown about by right wing nutjobs.
Here here.
There is also no way that Hillary Clinton would not have let it stand, if Obama had not been an eligible candidate. No one can say that SHE isn’t competitive enough to have exploited that sort of thing!
Yep, I gotta agree with this. She would not just let it go. Not her style.
maybe he’s tired of proveing it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over to every lil whine machine who is unhappy his choice for president ( or her ) didnt win.
Seriously, tell the truth now: If Obama himself walked up to your front door with his birth certificate, his mother’s medical chart, time-stamped security footage from the delivery room*, the attending doctor and the Labor/Delivery head nurse, 25 of the world’s top international forgery-detection experts, and Jesus fucking CHRIST standing behind him attesting to the validity and accuracy of the document, would that be enough for you? Would you say, “Oh, okay, thanks for clearing that up” or would you just say that all THESE people are in on the conspiracy too? If Obama got all the top scientists in the world to build a time machine and took you PERSONALLY back in time to watch the so you could see for yourself, would you finally believe, or would you say, “It’s just like how they faked the moon landing!”
He DID produce his birth certificate, and your people said, “No, that’s not good enough, it’s a fake.” What’s he supposed to do at that point? You’ve already demonstrated that you’re not going to accept anything he does produce, so I wouldn’t bother with you either. “You want to see my birth certificate? Here: *moons no_mo_bama* *wiggles it around*”
(And believe me, honey, when I wiggle my butt, it WIGGLES. You have just been SERIOUSLY wiggled at.)
*I know, they didn’t have it then. But even if they had, it still wouldn’t be enough for these people. They’d just yell “PHOTOSHOP!”
“If Obama was REALLY not born in this country, he would NOT be president. ”
You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you.
Yes, because its logical.
Fruitcake! Get your fruit cake here!
Mmm I love fruitcake on a Sunday afternoon…
*munches*
What?
Ugh, I hate fruitcake..
*regifts fruitcake*
The theory is that in the entire world, there are only 10 fruitcakes in existance and they keep getting passed around. It’s been that way since 1910.
-Hides crumbs- I heard there was cake, I didn’t realize it would taste THIS bad, but still. There’s now only 4 left in the world, Eddie.
Ho wlong you spend on that commode after those Fruit Cakes?!?! Need some prunes or ex–lax?
The fruitcake is a lie.
According to Lewis Black, all the candy corn in the world was made in 1914. “It’s corn…that tastes like candy. I can’t wait…this stuff tastes like shit!!!”
“And every year, like an Alzheimer’s patient, I think to myself ‘hey, it’s candy that tastes like corn! *takes a bite* MOTHERFU(KER!!!!’”
Every time I see my response here I think it says *regrets fruitcake* which would also be technically correct.
Heh… if you had fruitcake-as-it-was-meant-to-be (moist, bourbon infused concoction)…
However, those doorstoppers they sell at *Mart are not useful except as building supplies — I don’t even think boring bees can handle that stuff.
Fruitcake should be home-made, and ideally fed a half-bottle (35cl, not sure about ounces) of blended Scotch (well I suppose bourbon will do as a substitute) over about 6 months before eating.
I tried making one like that once. The universal consensus was “It’s better than…regular fruitcake. But wouldn’t it be easier to just skip the cake part and have a shot?”
I have a strange feeling that the PK-style fruitcakes are more than necessarily bourbon infused already. :/
I’ll take a bourbon ladden fruit cake, just hold the fruit cake!!!
I will also take a bourbon ladder, por favor!
What?
Oh.
He can nuke Hawaii all he wants. After we finally get to move back home.
Why would you even say that? I am also a Haole in Hawaii, and it is sh*t like that that gets locals to hate us. If you don’t like it, GTFO. I moved here for work and Hawaii become my home. So please, please stop perpetuating Haole stereotypes. Most of us are good people, but people like you make the rest of us suffer through your ignorance and refusal to accept the culture here.
Man, I hate to go off topic, but that really annoyed me.
As for the the LOL…I enjoyed it
african born? I don’t think so any more……but……………Obama IS GOING EASY ON HIM. he hiding and is doing nothing.
“Hawaiian born” being the real question here…
How so?
Everybody knows Obama wasn’t really “born” in Hawaii; he was created in a test tube as the pinnacle of genetic engineering, kind of like the “chickens” from KFC.
but is obama as tastey?
I’m going to speculate yes, but bear in mind I wasn’t actually there at the time.
Obama, sadly, was only made using 10 herbs & spices. Not 11.
However, his daughters and wife contain 12 a piece.
LOL
I can’t decide if this particular subthread is appallingly tasteless (no pun intended, honest!) or one of the funniest things on here.
Who says the two are mutually exclusive?
Agreed.
Doug Stanhope, Gilber Godfried, and the Nostalgia Critics “The Aristocrats” joke comes to mind.
How about biscuits, I love me some biscuits!!!!
Wow do people actually believe he’s an American citizen? What a joke.
So tell us, since you’re the font of all knowledge, exactly what country he is a citizen of? Do you honestly believe that a person can attain the highest office in the country without proving what his citizenship is? If you believe that, then you are complete and total moron.
-
You can’t be that stupid.. oh wait, based on your other posts, yes you are. Please readjust your tin-foil hat.
Eddie, you don’t want to know where that metal hat’s stuck.
Can I get some help removing it?
*hands Tyler some gloves and a pry bar*
-
While you’re at it, maybe you can free Jojo’s head as well. I’d help, but honestly, I’m too old and would probably have a heart attack from the strain.
Eddie, I would never take their head out.
If you do that, they’ll already have the sights/smells of what’s up there ingrained into their brains, but they can shout the stupid sh*t even louder.
*snort*
-
You make a valid point.. Ok, the head stays.
Eddie, however, do you think you could help me extract and rinse the brain? God knows that if we polish it a bit and give it to some other fellow who needs it they have a 99.999% chance of using it for…. Better reasons.
I think it’s only suitable for the rock tumbler.. it would make an excellent paperweight since that’s all it would be good for.
Eddie, don’t pretend there’s any actual density to it.
We all know that thing would blow away and/or the brain-shaped bubble would pop at the first breeze it encountered.
Well what shall we do with them, now that I’ve removed the craziness? -Holds up Tinfoil Hat/ Alien Brainwash Protection System, Highly advanced Mjolnir model 55-
It is dense, though. So dense it’s like a black hole and sucks in all common sense and compresses it to the point where it becomes non-existant.
-Snorts and rolls off bed- Eddie, too great. You are clearly a master physicist?
If anything, shove it further up there. I think somehow this one is still getting oxygen.
“Do you honestly believe that a person can attain the highest office in the country without proving what his citizenship is?” How come he passed legislation to only allow the head of state and the VP to access his records?
Why has he paid thousands of dollars to keep his birth certificate private?
Because he’s not a goddamn American!
Because he has goddamn limits and wants some damn privacy!
His mother is a natural-born citizen. That ALONE makes him a citizen!!!!!!!
Shannon. Facts don’t mean anything to these people. Only what Daddy Limbaugh tells them.
Truth is, even Limbaugh would probably admit that Obama is a qualified citizen. I don’t know where these people are pulling their information from, but since it smells strongly of sh*t, I can guess.
Bitter shit, no less. So so bitter they are.
*spits out his coffee* Well that explains a lot. Remind me not to have any of this stuff on extremist right winger day.
Extremist right winger COFFEE day*
I wish the Right Wingers here would get past the whole Amrican Born thing and focus on the real sad part here. Obama will do NOTHING until Hawaii is nuked. Let’s just focus on that, so we can be more creditable than saying “He’s not born here!” My GOD, leave it alone. Let’s focus on his current policy of appeasement (which worked so well in history), rather than a policy of “Don’t even think of it!!”
That depends on who you believe, the public soundbite or the subsequent private anecdote:-
For example, I’m fairly sure most of us either know no history at all or have heard of Neville Chaimberlain returning from Munich in 1938 and saying “I have here a piece of paper that will ensure peace in our time.”; a fair number have probably heard of Adolf Hitler referring to that treat in the terms “He (NC) was such a nice man that I felt I had to give him something.” What relatively few of us will have heard was that NC returned to 10 Downing st, called an emergency cabinet meating, and said “Well gentlemen, I’ve got us a year. What are your plans strenghening our armed forces?”
I wasn’t even refferring to Mr. Chamberlin who still did nothing until it was too late. France, Britian and the US should have enforced the terms of surrender with a bit more vigor, however fear of war allowed it to escilate. It would have been easier to crush Hilter prior to his Tank and Air cRaft build up than after.
However I was refferring to the appeasement that occurs everyday that allows monsters to stay in power. Darfur, Somalia, Serbia, Iraq, etc etc etc…. I mean it took Four plane crashes (two into the World Trade Center, 1 the Pentgon, and one in a field in Penn) for the American to wake up and realize we need to deal with terrorism. (First world trade center, embassys, USS Cole, weren’t warnings enough) I just don’t want to loose a GREAT vacation spot like Hawaii (Plus Dog the Bounty Hunter lives there), oh and American citizens (but mostly the great beaches)….
Just as a matter of opinion from a history buff, the whole thing might have been avoided if France and Englnad weren’t out to crush and humiliate Germany as much as possible after WWI with the Treaty of Versailles. It wasn’t that they needed to better enforce the surrender, they needed to have drawn up better terms for surrender in the first place. The Treaty of Versailles and the outcome landed Germany in the perfect position to be taken over buy a guy like Hitler who could manipulate and use that humiliation to its worst possible end…
Just a thought…
HMMMM or they could have enforced the treaties. The problem with war is the victors get to write the terms of surrender. If you don’t like the terms, don’t lose the war. Sort of like what the dems are saying to the repubs now, if you don’t like our policies, you should have beat us in the elections.
I do agree the terms were somewhat harsh, but no more harsh than most terms of surrender at that time. Remember the humiliation that Russia had to endure from Japan? Or how about the Spanish in the Spanish/ American war?
I agree with both of you; all I meant was that the real “behind the scenes stories” of these things often aren’t told until decades later, is ever.
Like the JFK assination was done by the Pentaverate!!!!
Or man didn’t land on the moon. It was all shot in a studio by Area 51.
The thing is, once you win a war, you need to put the war behind both you and your enemies. Rubbing their faces in it just gets them all geared up for another go at it. If we had helped the Germans rebuild after WWI, would they have listened to Hitler motivating them against the Allies? Maybe, but probably not. After WWII, we helped them rebuild. And now? No more bad blood. Yeah, as the winners we got to set the terms, but rubbing their faces in it was just a bad idea. Even you can justify doing so, it was still a bad idea.
Don’t forget we were in a Cold War with half of Germany after WWII. We helped to rebuild West Germany, but East Germany was still somewhat of a problem. And I have a feeling most of the EAst Germans who were jailed and killed under that wonderful Communist Regime would probably beg to differ about our “helping” to rebuild.
Also after WWII we prety much rubbed Germany and Japan’s faces in that we won. We had military bases on their soil, and still do. Japan still has to deal with the humiliation of losing WWII everytime we park a ship in their waters, and they still can only have a militray for defense purposes. The difference is we were harsher on the countries after the cease fires by keeping ourselves in their country vice levying harsh punishments and then leaving.
Uhm. So we should pull out of Iraq and charge them for our “services”, then?
Exactly. They can pay in oil. That way the left conspiracy theorist who believe the war was for oil, will get their wish.
Tyler: Seriously, don’t see where you got that from my post. I said that in WWII we stayed in the countries not only to rebuild but to enforce the armistice agreements. Might not have phrased it that way, but that’s what I was getting at.
It seemed like you were saying that it’s harsher on a country to help it rebuild itself after a war rather than completely destroying it’s economy and charging it for the damage it’s done to the world.
Which seems a bit strange, seeing as you’re a Republican. :/
Of course they were humiliated by losing the war. That’s gonna happen no matter what. The point is, the Allies helped soften the blow despite the fact that we got beat up pretty bad too. We could have done the same thing again, and set up the Germans to rebel against us all again and again. The attitudes after the two world wars were way different.
Hey wing-nut. Preemption was the LAST idiots policy. I can’t find anywhere in your bible where it says “strike your neighbors cheek before he can smack yours.” If they don’t hit us, we don’t hit them, capice? Have you any idea the shitstorm that will erupt if we just lob missiles at NK? That asshole will have the whole world’s sympathy, and we’ve lost all the good will that we’ve accumulated. And then folks will start choosing sides. I’m all FOR a president that chooses kinder, gentler means. A wise man once said “All we are saying is give peace a chance.”
Anyway, you better believe our defense department is watching them closely for aggression against us. One feint in our direction, and we’ll be all over them.
Well, personally, it seems like a stellar idea to publically disarm while a crazy dictator is shooting off missiles on a daily basis, all the while saying that one of these days very soon he’s going to put nuclear stuff all over the warhead of one of those missiles and aim it at us. Just stellar…..
Why, yes, froo…almost as stellar as the idea of AEROSOL SPRAY PANCAKE BATTER! {http://www.batterblaster.com/}
*covets*
Haven’t tried it myself, but a friend on another board did and was less than thrilled. I think the key would be having very, very low expectations, like this person on the customer comments page:
ROFLCOPTER! That IS low expectations.
*loathes eggos*
I’m going to swing by my local Safeway though and give this a whirl… THX.
I agree, so how do we do that? Anything we do toward that end will be seen as an “act of aggression” by Krazy-Kim, and we’re off to war on yet another front!
I think that PB had it right the other day when he said that Obama is seen as weak by the rest of the world. One of the reasons no one did anything major during Reagan’s terms, and no one did anything major after the 911 stuff (even just launching a few missiles here and there) is because Reagan was seen as just ASKING for a reason to push the red button, and no one knew if GW would push it just for the fun of it. There is a certain amount of security in having a leader who is seen as being just this side of crazy as far as national defense goes. With Obama publically disarming and extending olive branches to people who only understand gun fights, he’s coming off as a Harvey Milqtoast who won’t do anything but turn the other cheek if slapped and ask please sir for another. The Christian “turning the other cheek” only works if you’re dealing with non-crazy people, and I think that Kim Jung Il qualifies in the same bracket as Ahmadenijiahd. You cant’ treat everyone like Great Britain and expect the same results, because not everyone who runs a country is sane. Obama needs to get that “Just *GIVE* me a reason to push it, motherfu(ker!!!!!” vibe going with at least those people.
You want Obama to become John Mcclane? O.O
With certain people, sure. Why not? Do you treat everyone you know the exact same way, or do you let personality and circumstance dictate your behavior based on the situation at the time? There are core beliefs that you hold fast to, and peace can certainly be a core belief that Obama needs to keep near and dear to him. But you can’t be peace and nothing else. You have to be willing to defend yourself, and you have to make it abundantly clear that you WILL defend yourself should the need arise. At this point, I don’t really see Obama giving that vibe.
I think Obama is trying to be careful considering our nation’s shaky reputation right now. He wants to win back our old allies and rebuild our nation’s old reputation of being the good guys. Whether or not we deserve it, a lot of the world sees us as aggressors now and taking too hard a line with the Koreans could sabotage any support we might get. It’s a fine line, though, because you’re right, he doesn’t want to appear soft to Kim either.
Meanwhile Japan and S. Korea are stock piling umbrellas for the missles they’ll catch. Also the rest of the world was toughter on Iran than Obama, NOW that’s scarey when France is condemning someone (besides America) and we’re not.
The French are good at condemning, ILPB, we could condemn you for not eating your snail correctly. Going to war is another thing entirely.
No way. They condemn no one. Can’t pick a fight, b/c they only know how to drop a rifle. French rifle for sale, only dropped once. The French only condemn the US, b/c they know we won’t do anything, except say “You’d be speaking German if it weren’t for us.”
Are you joking? Because I’m gonna seriously disappointed if you’re serious.
It was mostly sarcastic. But really the French do not condmen anyone openly, only when you’re on their soil. Been there, done that, have the T-Shirt… they do make good wine though.
If Obama suddenly turned into Bruce Willis in the Die Hard series, I’m voting for him in 2012. No matter what, Froo. You know that’d be awesome.
No way, dude. Harrison Ford.
“Get off my plane!”
If he turns into Bruce Willis, *I* will vote for him. Proudly
Eric, -1 for incorrect, while humorous and relevant quoting.
Harrison Ford’s only REAL lines are “Give me my family back!” *stomp other person’s cell phone*
and “She can make the Kessel Run in under 10 parsecs.”
Haven’t seen Air Force One, have you?
I have, I thought it was hilarious
I thought your quote was plenty funny, however, I was making a Family Guy reference. >.<
Oh, I got the reference.
Sorry have to go with the Rock on this one. “Everytime I touch a gun, something bad happens.”
Let’s get Samuel L. Jackson in the White House!!!
Hmm….Samuel L. Jackson/Bruce Willis ticket? (As we were discussing John McClane above) Yep. Got MY vote.
I AM SICK OF THESE MOTHAF*CKIN SNAKES IN THIS MOTHAF*CKIN CITY!
(Yes, politician pun.)
Krazy Kim was testing nukes when GW was still in office. And he did nothing. Was he “soft”?
I would make the complete opposite assessment. I think a continued stance of near-at-hand aggression would be damaging, and I honestly believe that the world is safer if the US works more on the diplomatic side of things.
Yeah, I’m thinking maybe we oughta finish up what we started in OTHER countries before we get shit started with Lil Kim. That being said, he’s crazy and far more dangerous than Saddam ever was. He needs to be watched like a hawk.
Here’s something that perplexes me. Why does the UN have the authority to say, “Country A can’t have missiles, but Country B can.” Just because we don’t like their system of government or think their leader is insane means we can do that? Isn’t that a little hypocritical of us? Not to say I want Kim to be able to do whatever he wants, because I don’t. It just seems…odd.
That HAS occurred to me before. I think the best way to justify it is that it’s like getting a license to carry a handgun, only on a much larger scale… “Nope, sorry, you’re batsh!t crazy, so you can’t have one.”
I think we get to have them because being the first country to successfully develop one, we’re grandfathered in.
So why does Ahmadinijhad get them?
Maybe he knows the right people?
“Who do I have to fu(k to get my license for nukes around here, huh?”
By the way, I’m loving this discussion. NOBODY is getting ugly and calling names. NOBODY is getting mad. I’m loving it!
Except you calling my a wing-nut. But that’s a mnor over sight….
I don’t think I’m a wingnut. Maybe a lock washer.
I’m a wood screw!
(Not even sure what that means)
It means you screw wood. Hey aren’t you married?
But that’s affectionate. If I hated you, I would call you MUCH meaner things. I call my best friend asshole and he calls me a bastard.
But I don’t know you…. o calling me names isn’t very nice.. HHHMPH!!! Seriously though dude, you did come acorss as kind of “superior” when I really didn’t insult someone.
That’s a good question.
B/C we haven’t taken the muzzle off Israel yet.
He gets them?
Well, mostly it’s not UN’s authority. It’s the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty signed by most of the world in 1968. So – most of the countries are, or have been, voluntarily sibscribing to the treaty’s conditions.
The article is an interesting read – I was not aware of all the details, at least.
I mean – mostly it’s not just the UN going “you can have”, “you can not”. I was a bit unclear there, as I am wont to be.
Hey Ivan: Maybe you should change the name to insanley annoying. I think that Paw and Eric both left leaning idividuals on this site would tell you I’m not a religious wingnut. Actually I’m pretty moderate. Where did I say that we should lob missles into NK either? I just said that I don’t like Obama’s weak take on NK. I thing he needs to take a harder stance.
Oh and to your second paragraph, our defense and CIA are probably watching them, but can not act unless a) Fired upon or b) Given permission by the Commander in Chief (aka Obama). Since once fired upon with a nuke it tends to be a little late, and Obama will not give permission until fired upon, our military in this scenario is at a SEVERE disadvantage. Also you don’t htink him testin Mid-Range missles is a “feint” in our direction? I’m sorry what constitutes a “feint” in our direction?
Well, I spoke too soon. Hey PB, eat me.
With or without whip cream? And I wasn’t insulting to you…. you called me wing-nut, I’m more of a hex nut!!!!
well..was george washington born in the US? no it was a brittish coloney so clearly george washington was a muslim secret terrorist commie too
Full of WIN!
Agreed.
WINNER’S POINT.
Grimmiekins, you’ve started my day off right!
From Wikipedia:-
Eligibility
Article II, Section 1, Clause 5 of the Constitution sets the principal qualifications one must meet to be eligible for election as President. A Presidential candidate must:
be a natural born citizen of the United States;…
To me that means that he must be born naturally, so no induced or caesearian births may apply. It does not as written disqualify someone who was:-
1) Born outside the USA of US parents.
2) Born in the USA of foreign parents.
3) Appear to disqualify anyone else who was born naturally, and meets the other requirements.
Even though it is normally interpreted as meaning that only children of US citizens may be President.
No actually George Washington was a slave owning terrorist, GET it RIGHT!!
Jane, I demand that you quit fooling around with the keys to the dungeon. You have now allowed the nutjobs to escape and I really think you should be responsible for rounding them up. I’m not going to, they’re covered with drool and something smelly. So grab your gloves and get to it missy!
Don’t worry, Eddie.
I did it already. It’s like zombies, all I needed to do was turn on the traps around my house, keep the shotgun and baseball bat nearby at all times, and shout logical, intelligent chains of thought.
They came running.
I didn’t do it, I didn’t do it!!!! I wasn’t even here today!
That’s exactly the problem, Jane. If you’re going to keep the keys, you have to stay all day. Otherwise the smaller idiots will slip between the bars and infect one of us.
Don’t you have your troll spray? I always keep a citronella candle lit too. Oddly enough, works GREAT on trolls.
And if you’re up for a bit of fun, a kick to the groin is great entertainment value.
Meh. If you make a giant wall of fire, they’ll stare at it for hours while you deal with them and their friends quietly.
Eddie, what about the female Trolls, they don’t have nards, and your foot would get stuck!!!!
Ewwwwwwwww.
Um, yeah. That’s just nasty.
Well no more nasty than your Hannity juice.Besides he wouldn’t fit in the juicer.
Hmmm.. let me ponder that one..
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*ponder ponder ponder* (by the way, what a cool word, eh?
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Ok, here’s what we do.. we sterlize them but don’t let them know, then hook them up with a male troll. They will get frustrated because they can’t make baby trolls and end up killing each other.
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How’s that sound?
HMMMMM, but how to we make them want to meet up with male trolls? From what I understand male trolls never leave their Grandma’s basement.
I’ve heard Milky Way does the trick.. but that’s only been in discussions. I have no verifiable proof.
I thought it was a Star Trek convention?
With Milky Way maybe..
but really folks, kim jong ill is really really insane….lets not forget that….most likely a secret muslim terrorist too..and he cant be president
To be perfectly fair, I have to point out that under the laws for citizenship at the time Obama was born, IF he had been born outside the US (which he wasn’t), his mother’s citizenship might not have automatically qualified him for citizenship, because of her age and/or Hawaii’s date of entry to the Union.
The laws applicable to children born in 1961 are different than today’s laws. From the link (US State Department) at my name:
“Birth Abroad to One Citizen and One Alien Parent in Wedlock: A child born abroad to one U.S. citizen parent and one alien parent acquires U.S. citizenship at birth under Section 301(g) INA provided the citizen parent was physically present in the U.S. for the time period required by the law applicable at the time of the child’s birth. … For birth between December 24, 1952 and November 13, 1986, a period of ten years, five after the age of fourteen are required for physical presence in the U.S. to transmit U.S. citizenship to the child.”
One argument says that since Obama’s mother was 18 when he was born, she obviously had not yet attained “five years after the age of fourteen” of living anywhere.
Another (equally flimsy) argument says that since Hawaii did not become a state until 1959, when Obama was born in 1961 his mother had only been living “in the US” for a maximum of two years.
Snopes dot com addresses this more thoroughly in their article titled “Native Son” in Politics|Barack Obama.
The reason I’m mentioning it here is: Please stop using it as a reason why the Birthers’ charges are invalid.
THEIR CLAIMS ARE INVALID BECAUSE OBAMA WAS BORN IN HAWAII.
When you say, “Well, even if he *wasn’t* born in the US, it doesn’t matter because his mother –” you’ve just reinforced for them the possibility that maybe he wasn’t and there’s a massive conspiracy/coverup/excuse-making machine to address that. Also, you’ve given them an opportunity to say, “Aha! But you’re wrong about that, so you’re obviously wrong about everything else too.”
His mother’s citizenship may or may not have conferred citizenship on him, but that’s irrelevant because it was unnecessary, since he was born on US soil according to the law of the land. End of story.
Don’t bother, E.
They don’t deal in facts, people who accuse him of being a secret muslim/foreigner terrorist view wealth as the amount of bullsh*t floating around in your head at any given time.
AHHHHHHHHHHH LOGIC….REASON!!!! IT BURNS US IT FREEZES US…OH IT HURTS SOOO
WE SHALL NOT BE STOPPED BY YOUR FIERY LOGIC! MOLE PEOPLE! RESCUE ME! (Waits impatiently)
They’re real, right? I just assumed that because I’ve never seen them before they must exist.
Well, the fact that you’ve never seen them proves that they’ve been sealed and classified top secret by the Kenyan government, at least…
Well, of course. So, does that mean that the Kenyan government will seal me away too, because I know and have such incredible amounts of illogical conviction towards the unknowable?
You know of course that facts were created to be proven wrong, right? Right? I mean, how else do you explain, after all this time, that people still insist Obama isn’t a citizen? What’s really sad is, had McCain won, this issue would be coming at us from the left. So it doesn’t matter what side of the fence you’re on, there will always be groups of people that will grasp at any straw hoping for some sort of victory.
Yeah, Eddie, it wouldn’t be America without our screaming, ranting, uninhibited crazies.
“Victory”… In the loosest sense of the word. More like someone to argue with them, to, just for a second, fill that hollow void they feel because no one will ever think much of them in real life. Because by trolling on the interwebs, they feel that spark of heat in their tiny, cobwebbed chests that is actual argument. Because it’s so much better than *real* emotions, right? I mean, trolling to make people angry is SO much better than getting out there and meeting people who’ll make you live your life, right?
“someone to … just for a second, fill that hollow void they feel… they feel that spark of heat in their tiny, cobwebbed chests”
… Eww. I feel so… tainted now. Like how the Ghostbusters guys must have felt when they got slimed. I DID NOT CONSENT TO THIS!
(lol)
I know. Doesn’t it just explain the modern troll perfectly?
I had to reach deep, deep down and revisit my days of trollish arguing and insulting people, back when I was a kid and thought I was always right and everyone else must be wrong and that for some reason, lashing out verbally at those who dissented with me was the right solution. I never had the same amount of sheer idiocy these guys had, but I’d call names and act like people were beneath me, back when I was a kid. /guilt. However, I’m proud of the fact that I only ever yelled at other trolls.
A bit like Fester, but less clever, since I was 10/11. Ah, how difficult it is knowing how those trolls feel and not being able to help them.
Yeah, tainted.. it doesn’t help that I’m in a truly foul mood today, so while I feel icky and dirty, I’m also pissed off enough not to do anything about it and let everyone around me catch a whiff!
Ah, Eddie. I don’t mind, shall we bash trolls for the next few days?
Oh hell yeah.. Lock and load, we’re going in!
I suggest we start with Dr. I.S down below.
Buddy action movie anyone?
Eddie, Tyler, and Eric ARE The Troll Squad.
>:D muahahaha! -Evil laughter ensuing- Look out, ebil/stupid trolls.
We need snappy catch phrases STAT!
Where is pittypat when you need a catch phrase?!?!
Why don’t we just steal a song and make new lyrics, then make our catch phrases out of insults used to bash trolls?
No, no, Tyler. Snappy catch phrases. I’ll be back. It’s just been revoked. You feeling lucky, punk? Yippy-ki-yay, mother f-er! Can you smell what the Rock is cooking?
“Time to go back under the bridge!”
“It’s a trolldown.”
“Troll today, gone tomorrow.”
“It’s troll hunting season.”
How about those?
I was thinking of the fourth one an hour ago. Hrmmm… Wipe the Hannity off your soul (Republican crazy trolls only.)
For hypocrites- Oh look, It’s Troell Lieberman!
For liberal trolls- It doesn’t work if you’re not Jon Stewart.
And while the catch phrase is being hammered out, here’s a musical interlude for your enjoyment. This is dedicated to all of the trolls out there:
-
I turn on the tube and what do I see
A whole lotta people cryin dont blame me
They point their crooked little fingers ar everybody else
Spend all their time feelin sorry for themselves
Victim of this, victim of that
Your mommas too thin; your daddys too fat
Get over it
Get over it
All this whinin and cryin and pitchin a fit
Get over it, get over it
You say you havent been the same since you had your little crash
But you might feel better if I gave you some cash
The more I think about it, old billy was right
Lets kill all the lawyers, kill em tonight
You dont want to work, you want to live like a king
But the big, bad world doesnt owe you a thing
Get over it
Get over it
If you dont want to play, then you might as well split
Get over it, get over it
Its like going to confession every time I hear you speak
Youre makin the most of your losin streak
Some call it sick, but I call it weak
You drag it around like a ball and chain
You wallow in the guilt; you wallow in the pain
You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown
Got your mind in the gutter, bringin everybody down
Complain about the present and blame it on the past
Id like to find your inner child and kick its little ass
Get over it
Get over it
All this bitchin and moanin and pitchin a fit
Get over it, get over it
Get over it
Get over it
Its gotta stop sometime, so why dont you quit
Get over it, get over it
Hell Freezes Over FTW!!
“I ain’t afraid of no Troll!!”
ok–I just want them to read something other than Rush Limbaugh’s biography- sorry—I see your point and will try to avoid feeding them in the future.
he was born in Africa you dummy
Been rehashed already enough.
He wasn’t born in Africa.
Remove tinfoil hat from eyes and anus and read the other comments, please.
Wrong. He is your lawful President. Deal with it.
can we round up all these asshats and send them somewhere?
New Zealand maybe?
ERIC! Don’t you dare suggest mixing Maoris with trolls. That would be perverse.
…
Argentina?
May I suggest the moon?
I vote that we cage them in the sun.
Somewhat like what Zeus did with the Titans.
Or perhaps send them down to Tartarus. I think that’s where they crawled out from anyway.
I vote Kenya. Or Nigeria.
Irony FTW!
“you dummy?”
What is this, Sanford & Son & Hannity?
Sigh…
[citation needed]
Don’t make stuff up, dipshit.
HAHAHAHA you really think he was born in Hawaii?? And you ask for proof otherwise when he didn’t even display his birth certificate? Oh wait, its in Nigeria.
Been rehashed, photographs have been taken of it repeatedly, it clearly states born in Hawaii, he HAS shown it to the media, you’re a wingnut, that is all.
Wipe the drool off your chin, it’s not a good look..
That’s not drool, Eddie. It’s Sean Hannity’s “Happy Sauce”.
Oh! Ewwwwwwww, not only do I feel dirty and icky, I think I’m going to hurl now.
That’s what I thought too, but it turns out you can offset the illness by thinking about boobies.
It’s not helping, man. Nothing makes the thought of Hannity’s happy sauce better. *curls up into a ball and cries*
Dudes! Will you please stop saying Hannity’s Happy Sauce! Fucking hell!
It’s kryptonite to liberals.
Jane-
SB- It’s better that we recognize it than to accidentally let people get infected with it, isn’t it?
If you must refer to the HHS, please, refer to it in acronym form only. My eyes are still bleeding from last night.
Maybe.
And what if we *want* to make you bleed a little?
Refer to what? Oh you mean Hannity’s Happy Sauce? How about Hannityjuice?
Secret Santorum Sauce.
So not cool right now. I was eating a grilled cheese, damnit.
Dickcheese?
I KILL YOUUUUUU!!!!!
I <3 YOUUUUUUU!!!!
I recommend YATTA! for brain bleach. Makes everything seem just fine again.
Guys all the love and hate being tossed around is disturbing the HHS!!! Its psycho-reactive!
Brain bleach, yes. But what IS yatta?
It cannot be described… it can only be watched… and it shouldnt freak you out…. too much.
@VG: On this site you get lyrics and an American translation under “more info” to the right.
Roughly, “yatta” = “I did it!” or “All right!”.
(but most of all it’s just so easy – happy go lucky!)
Dude, I don’t comment often, but you just made me puke in my mouth a little.
You’d think one of these crackpots would be able to at least attempt to come off as a civilized human being and not a total asshole. But no, the crackpots truly are pots with cracks in them.
Crack HEADS—Their heads have cracks….
I am sincerely depressed that there are so many people who still believe that Obama is legal-born. The truth is that his “Birth Certificate” is actually a Certificate of Live Birth. Which means that his mother could have had him born in Kenya and then flown back to Hawaii and signed in at a hospital.
Furthermore, NOBODY has explained why Obama hired three lawyers to try and protect the information regarding his international student financial aid. If he tries to hide it, something’s wrong.
The fact that he already broke nearly every promise he made prior to the election is even more vindicating.
I am sincerely depressed that there are so many trolls.
The fact that someone breaks a promise doesn’t make you right.
He has shown his birth certificate to the press many times.
I’m not even going further with this statement.
The fact that someone hires lawyers to protect him from massive amounts of slander doesn’t necessarily indicate that something is wrong. If you were under huge amounts of scrutiny, I’d imagine you’d want to get your legal quibbles cleared up too. His mother, also, was a legal citizen at the time of his birth, and I don’t see a reason for her going back to Kenya to have a baby. Nor would that negate his citizenship. If you’re going to bring up his grandmother, I’d like to point out that she has over nine grandchildren, and is recalling an event nearly 40 years ago. On another note, you’re clearly irritated. Might want to buy some butthurt lotion to ease the swelling and rashes.
Butthurt lotion! I love it!
You know what it’s made with Eric.
Part Baconlube, part horse, and part Hannityjuice. He started donating to the butthurt lotion research facility after A- Sperm banks refused to take him on account of terribly faulty DNA, and B- He realized that he was so butthurt he had to actually contribute to the cure.
Evidently, he hasn’t taken his own advice in regards to him trying to “fix” America yet.
That’s funny. I thought for sure Hannityjuice would create more butthurt than cure.
No, the rash acts up again and the cream stops working when people actually LISTEN to him.
I wasn’t exactly going there with that joke, but okay.
First of all you f*ckwit, his mother was a U.S. citizen, thus bestowing upon Obama the same rights. So even if he was born in Kenya, which he wasn’t, he would still be a U.S. citizen.
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Secondly, as for him hiring three lawyers to protect information, put up or shut up. You want to make a case, provide a citation to back it up.
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Thirdly, what in the fsck are you going on about and how does this pertain to his citizenship?
I know, right? Eddie, you are a winner- because whether or not you keep your campaign promises DOES NOT relate to your area of birth.
That’s like Craniomethodology. (The belief that the size and shape of your head in correlation to things like your eyes and nose and eyebrows can determine your personality.)
Having fun, Eds?
Yeah, and I’m still the mood to kick someone’s ass.
Sorry, craniometry. Site-
{http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Craniometry}
“First of all… even if he was”
OI! Stop that!
.
(The rest of this post is not directed at you, eddie, just me venting in general.)
*sigh*
It is entirely unfuckingreal to me how people can believe that the ENTIRE GOVERNMENT AND MEDIA – including people like Limbaugh, Coulter, et al – are either IGNORING this or are somehow unaware of these “facts.” Good Lord!
If Obama could organize a conspiracy/cover-up/fleece job like THAT, if he could get that many people from every position on the spectrum to agree to sit placidly and just let him violate not only campaign rules and regs, but the CONSTITUTION, why has he not taken over the entire WORLD by now? (He could seize all their GNPs to pay off our national debt and shore up Social Security. I don’t *want* to have to work until I’m 85!)
For Pete’s sake, we live in a culture where every detail of a politician’s life is splashed across the tabloids and people build entire careers out of commenting on them, yet here’s a man who’s perpetrated probably the greatest fraud of our country’s history and everyone in a position of authority just looks the other way? The ONLY people who noticed or cared are nutcase attorneys and internet bloggers/commentors??
Think what you like about the man’s politics, policies, or performance, but for God’s sake use a little common sense and critical thinking!
Under other circumstances, I would say “It’s sad that the only thing you can find fault with about him is a hyped up allegation about his birth certificate,” but that’s the funny thing – I support the man, but even *I* can find fault with plenty of issues and decisions. It’s not like there’s nothing else to complain about!
The worst part of all is, my father is approaching “elderly” and the older he gets, the MORE rabidly political he becomes, and the LESS willing he is to do ANY fact checking of his own or apply any critical thinking at all. He just believes whatever the talk radio people tell him, and never stops to think that anyone who gets paid to talk about a topic, is going to have a vested interest in keeping people, well, interested and building ratings… if they have to choose between telling a boring truth and being out of a job, or telling a sensational lie, half-truth, or rumor and making million$$, what do you think is going to happen?
Exactly the problem I had with my super-conservative great Aunt Lorraine yesterday. As she gets older, she just stops checking for correctness and says things like “This Obama guy’s just leading straight to Nazism, lemme tell ya, cause he can take over companies, that’ll lead us right to Nazism!”
/facepalm.
To which you reply, “Aunt Lorraine, I think it’s time for your enema again.”
After which I should reply “SILENCE! You do not discuss the Fourth Reich!” Just to scare the old woman.
Tell her all you have to do is accept the Mark and join the Fourth Reich and everything will be just fine and see what she does.
Random & OT, but Eric, I have to tell you how much I looovve your new avatar pic. Wish You Were Here is such an awesome album. (Damn, I need to get that on cd…I just have it on vinyl and haven’t had anything to PLAY it on in years!)
Thanks.
It’s my favorite album ever. And it’s worth it to have on CD so you can hear the whole thing in one shot without having to flip the record or anything.
I’m a diehard PF fan.. I have been to everyone of their concerts from DSOTM to The Wall.. Just incredible live.. Roger Waters recently came to Oz, but frankly, I didn’t go because it’s not the same without the others. And now that Richard Wright has gone to the Great Gig In The Sky, it will never happen.
*pouts* I’m still getting lego Indy.
Clear your cache? Froo’s got a pretty new one, too!
Wow, Irritated. This sounds like a serious conspiracy that threatens our very way of life! I’m SO glad you brought this to our attention. I mean, if this is true then Washington needs to know about it! Who would have guessed that our government wouldn’t thoroughly check out the man elected to the highest post in the land! You’d think they would’ve checked that out first! Tell you what, Irritated. I highly recommend you take the irrefutable proof that you have of Obama’s scams, and take them directly to Washington! Your voice must be heard! I am assuming you have proof of this, otherwise you would just come off looking like a conspiracy nutjob. And I’m SURE that isn’t the case. So get going, Irritated! I’ll wait here to hear what they say!
I know, right? On the other hand, what I see when looking through the comments on this lol (so far) reminds me so much of the early (or earlier – say, 15+ years back) days of the newsgroups (also known as Usenet – yes, now that you ask, I am extremely old and feeble, thank you, but I used to hang out on AFU). What I’m seeing is the occasional troll being thrown out there followed by a bunch of responses (to which the troll sits back chuckling over because they Got A Response! Yay!).
.
This is like that “church” in Kansas where they’re so obsessed by the ultimate evil: “Homosexualitiness!!11axd!q1!1!!” that they can hardly wipe their own bottoms, but in reverse (I accuse the entire congregation (and hierarchy) of that Satan-based church (honestly, would any other deity spew such crap?) of wanting nothing more than attention. It’s like a three-year-old, honestly).
.
In the meantime, my point is: don’t feed the trolls – they enjoy it.
Bodo, we’re having a troll-bashing event. They may enjoy it, but if it goes unrefuted people might think they’re… Right.
We’re enjoying it too. That’s the point! We’ve got pent up aggression that we’re unleashing on the trolls! If at any point the trolls start getting to us, that’s when we know it’s time for bed.
(And I’m old enough to know what what Usenet was.)
Usenet seems vaguely familiar, like one of those things my friend Jeremy my other computer-oriented friend and I had a conversation about in detail but that I can’t remember because it’s 2 in the morning.
Ok, first, it’s not quite 11:00pm
, but second, my main point is that the only real way to deal with this kind of thing is to ignore it (as satisfying as it is to respond, it’s even more annoying to them to ignore them). If you look over the whole of the comments you can see that it’s kind of like someone feeding chunks of kindling into the flames every once-in-a-while when they die down (I’ve been on vacation, so I’ve had to do some catch-up).
Tyler is on the east coast, so yeah, it would 2 am for him. That aside, we’re bored and there isn’t any worthwhile discussions going on. If you somehow have an ‘in’ with the PK admins, please let them know we want the funny! Show us the funny!
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As Eric said, we venting pent up frustration. What’s wrong with that? Even though it’s tantamount to bashing our heads against the wall, I’m sure at some level other’s are enjoying the entertainment value.
Alas, troll bashing is much like football*. Great fun to play, but not much of a spectator sport.
*)Yes, football.
True, but then people insist on watching just the same..
… because there’s nothing else on!
Anyway, I agree with both sides here – on the one hand it’d be lovely if trolls could get zero response because that would make it easier to only catch interesting conversations, but on the other hand there aren’t really any interesting conversations happening right now, so … Meh. ;p
Funny how that works, isn’t it? I mean, who in their right mind would want to subject themselves to NASCAR, but there you have it. And the saddest part is, they will all head of to work on Monday yammering about how good the race was. I find myself getting sucked into the tennis, even though 99% of the people playing are unknown to me. But still, there I sit like a mindless robot hoping to see something spectacular like a faceplant..
I’ve done that before.
Just shaddup.
How can you not like the idea of a traffic jam where you’ve got 43 17 foot long cars doing 140mph round a 2600 foot long oval? My math says that’s about 1 car every 4.5 car lengths.
It is quite interesting. I keep watching Simpsons episodes even when I’ve seen them so many times I now what’ll happen next and the laughter comes even before the jokes, and so on. I don’t really enjoy those episodes, but nevertheless tend to gravitate to them on the telly. Muchos silly.
Eddie: Look he’s doing a left turn!!! He’s making another left turn!!! OMG another left turn!!!!
Oh, please don’t mistake me (although I can see how that could happen) – I’ve enjoyed the posts, and all, but in reading through it at this late date I couldn’t help but be struck by the, what, uber-trollness (sorry, not sure how to do umlauts and not willing to research at this time) of some of the posts. While the responses have all been entertaining (and factual, even – imagine that), I just hate the idea that the trolls are sitting back there hugging themselves because someone responded to them, that’s all. But don’t stop on my account, or anything (like anyone would) – have fun.
Here: have an ü!
(& uuml;) but without the space between & and u.
Thanks (too late, but thanks
– next time). And now, even though it isn’t even 23:30 here yet, I’m off (something about driving up from LA today has tired me out, sorry).
Wait, up from L.A.? I’m guessing Santa Barbara? Or are inland?
Actually, spent the week in San Diego, but my sister-in-law is in LA (visiting there helps me appreciate the Bay Area when things get a little too weird here).
I never did like L.A., aside from the weirdness. I much prefer SF or SD.. But now that I live in Oz, I prefer here more..
Eddie: Please tell me you’re talking of only visiting SF? Great city to visit, beautiful, GREAT Maritime museum, but I’m sorry the most unappreciative city to our men and women in uniform.
Visiting, yes. Living, no.. did that at one time way back when. However, just to qualify your comment, you must actually mean Berkely, the center of known stupidity.
Eddie: Nope I mean SF. They originally denied the Marines the ability to shoot that cool commercial in Gateway Park. They refuse to accept the Iowa as a Museum b/c it represents war, so she sits in a river with the mothballed merchant fleet and rots. At least give her the credit she deserves and decomm her with respect.
Look at the bright side, at least someone’s daughter is safe tonight!
Point to Eddie. If only it keeps them distracted for long enough…
It doesn’t, that’s why we have to engage them at times. Just consider it as doing our part for humanity!
My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.
– Penn Jillette
I’m a creep who smells good, I think I like this lady.
**Sniff****Sniff** Is that a skunk in your pants or you just happy to see me?
Wait… I’m not supposed to bring Pepe le Pew on dates?
Eh, the PK (also Cheezburger etc.) Admins are all up in Warshington state, near as I can tell – I’m down here in Cupertino Cafilnoria, so I’ve got no pull at all, sorry. I am fixing to load up a picture of a pangolin on a handrail, though, for what it’s worth (assuming the pictures came out).
Ah, Cupertino.. I lived in High Desert for way to many years.. hence the dry cough and and aversion to dust.
Pangolin.. I Googled it because I never heard of one. Did you take the pic?
My spousal-unit took the pics – it was extremely cool (San Diego zoo) – the handler-dude put the pangolin (sort of a stretched-out, arboreal armadillo-thing from, I think South America) on the hand-rail of the enclosure and it just zoomed along. I’ve been working on some kind of “monorail pangolin” caption (i. e. “Monorail Pangolin fills in for Monorail Cat on holiday”) ever since, but it’s a work in progress. Plus, my advanced age (and crappy eyesight) means that I won’t know if the pics came out until I download them somewhere bigger than the itty-bitty screen on the back of the camera. Side note: about every fourth vehicle we saw in San Diego was from Aridzona (why would anyone want to leave Aridzona in July, after all). My folks lived in a high-desert for a while – it was fascinating to see the explosion of housing development reach all the way to where they were in north Vegas in just a couple of years.
The SD zoo is world class.. I always enjoyed it. The desert was good while I lived there. Then suddenly everyone in L.A. started moving up there. That was when I decided to bail and moved to New Mexico. I left the state of California and never looked back. The only time I set foot there is when I fly in from Australia, and it’s just long enough to catch a flight to somewhere else.
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If you want to seem strange animals, come down this way. It’s not uncommon to be driving along next to a ‘roo going full tilt. But as it’s mentioned before, the spiders here are rather gruesome and scary, and sometimes even a good whack with a shoe does nothing more than piss them off more.
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Anyhoo.. it’s late there and early here and I have things to do and pubs to visit..
But, we’re bored and waiting for something funny to actually come up. Meanwhile, we get our entertainment where we can.
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Otherwise, you have a valid point.
You might appear more intelligent if you weren’t repeating what about ten other people have already said today. Then again, probably not.
Were you BLIND and DEAF during the primary? Hillary would never have let him make it past that if that were even remotely close to being true. Common sense FAIL.
What does Obama care. He wasn’t threatening to bomb Kenya.
…. Grandma, get off the computer! You’re going to break it!
Where do these people keep coming from? It’s like a bad zombie movie where there are somehow several hundred more zombies than there are people living in the infected town.
My bet is that there’s some sort of organization of dumbass lurkers. Whenever they lurk upon something where they can be morons, they alert the whole team.
Oh right, it’s that special code for special people..
“Something stupid this way comes. I repeat, something stupid this way comes.”
Are you suggesting they have some sort of moron-signal used to summon other morons in time of stupidity?
Like Batman, but without the cape and awesome gadgets?
Exactly!
It wouldn’t surprise me if they have capes, though.
-Hides suspicious red cloth- Don’t make fun of me just because I wear a cape!
Wannabe! Almost as bad as a troll..
No capes!
~Edna Mode
-Loads shotgun and sets tripwire silently, eyes red and shaking Eric like a madman- DON’T YOU SEE, ERIC?! THEY WERE ALL RIGHT! IT WAS A GIANT CONSPIRACY TO TURN US INTO NAZI ZOMBIESSS! Look out, they’re at the Right-wing wall! They’re INSIDE the walls! IN the walls! Someone help us!
*injects Tyler with sedative*
I think someone needs to settle down a little bit. Now give me the shotgun before someone gets hurt.
-Falls into a drugged-out trance, taking cover behind a wall- Shhh.. I can hear them, man…. All the soshullists and stuffs, man. They’re going to make us not-America, man. It’s like, jungle fever, dude, look out, man, those liberals are so up to all their evil plots.
-Hurls- Euuughh. I think I need an exorcism.
What? What the? This isn’t a sedative! It’s Hannityjuice!! Oh sick!!
-Twitches and heads towards blood dialysis machine- I don’t even trust my KIDNEYS with this stuff, Eric.
SOCKS. And I don’t mean the cat.
Yeah, someone’s sock drawer is seriously empty right now. I thought of that too.
And they smell too…
-Is confused-
Wikipedia on SOCKS.
If you didn’t mean that that was what made you confused, then I apologise for misunderstanding.
Maybe he should, then people would really have something to talk about. In fact, while he’s at it he can make North Korea one vast parking lot as well.
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@Eric, I hate to say it, but I think Pelosi’s last trip the toilet produced more than the usual excrement.
Is THAT where they come from?
So I’ve heard.. and sources are saying the Pelosi has been working overtime on the flush. I wonder what’s up with that. ZOMG! Another Konsperasy!
Of course, Eddie. It’s only a good conspiracy as long as it’s incorrect. Otherwise, it’s all *logical* and *sane*, which are things there are clearly none of in the troll community.
Pelosi: “I don’t remember eating that.”
Q. Why hasn’t Barack Obama release his authentic birth certificate yet?
A. He accidently smoked it.
OMG, that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever f-ing heard! YOU, are a comedy legend.*
(Disclaimer: by funniest I meant most pathetic, and by comedy legend, I mean smelly anal fungus)
Smelly anal funguses… Do I even want to ask why/how you know they exist, Eric?
I don’t know if they exist or not. I just like putting disgusting things with the words anal, butt, or ass to see what creative insults I can come up with.
Hrmmm… Anal vomit?
This game is gross.
I apologize. It should’ve read “Anal Pukestain”
Eh. That doesn’t really work. But Ass stain does!
EEEEEWWWWW!!!! Eric sniffs butts?!?! How else would he know where the smell is eminating from?!?!? EEEWW EEEWW EWWW!!!!
Yes, I sniff butts. And you really need to start wiping better.
But I thought you liked the dingleberries…. hitting your nose and all?
In re: the certificate.
• Where is the embossed seal and the registrar’s signature?
• Comparing it to other Hawaii birth certificates, the color shade is different.
• Isn’t the date stamp bleeding through the back of the document “June 2007?” (Odd since it was supposedly released in June 2008.)
• There’s no crease from being folded and mailed.
• It’s clearly Photoshopped and a wholesale fraud.
How can you call photoshop on something that’s been released to the media? I think it’d be a fraud, bud. And I’m not exactly inclined to believe you if you come along and nitpick yet don’t show any proof, or even a link to the photograph you’re referring to.
1) For a full explanation, please go to [http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/birthcertificate.asp] and quit wasting our fscking air with this crap.
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2) As explained at the above link
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3) So? What difference does it make. He obviously thought dumbasses like you would be asking the question.
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4) Why does there have to be a crease? Mine doesn’t.
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5) Yeah, geez, why didn’t I think of it being ’shopped. But just for the sake of clarity, can you explain where it was ’shopped?
Every single point you made was debunked by FactCheck.org
There are even high res photos of each portion of the document that you question.
They have a photo of the raised seal, the crease, and certificate number. The date stamp DOES say June, 2007 because that is when Hawaii officials produced it for the campaign.
If this is true, then why aren’t the Republicans fighting tooth and nail to get him thrown out of office? I seriously doubt they would say, “Oh, wow, not really a US citizen, huh? Well, that’s okay. We’ll get him next time around for sure! We can sit on our butts for 4 years. No problem!”
Is anyone keeping a count of how many trolls are crying “He’s not an American citizen!!!” on this LOL?
I’ll count for you, hold on a second.
Thanks Tyler.
Thirteen, Squiggly, and two complaining about how Obama is turning us to socialism/brainwashing the public, etc, you get the idea.
A low number, actually. There’s usually more of ‘em down here.
Wow. That makes me lose faith in humanity right there…
Yeah, I think right about here is the appropriate place to post an old post on an Al Gore thread long gone on PK. It’s sarcasm, for the trolls who can’t tell.
“Tom Foolery says:
June 10, 2008 at 10:16 am
Yes, yes… and neither does evolution, the sun revolves around the earth, and the Earth is a few thousand years old. How dare people use this “science” business to prove us wrong. I choose to only believe things that I have absolutely no evidence for, but I feels it in my center place where you fools think the heart is! Take that scientists! You can never prove me wrong because I refuse to believe your “science” is better than my opinions!”
Tyler: To a point. But remember science doesn’t have the answer to all, AND science is based off of theories (un proven “opinions”). Once proven it becomes facts, but at this point there is still so much un proven. Yes we know the earth is spherical, yes the earth rotates around the sun, yes there is fossil evidence of evolution, all those thing I agree with, it’s when people tend to use Junk science. The warmer temperatures are due to global warming, the stagnent temperatures are due to global warming, the cooling temperatures are due to global warming, the ice caps growing in the South are due to global warming, the willbe horrible this season b/c of global warming (2008 when there was adonfirmed 3 hurricanes I believe), or better yet cell phones will cause brain cancer!! Don’t get me wrong I love science, it’s a great tool to use against both radical sides, but like “faith” it is abused and thrown in people’s faces as the tell all, regardless of it being wrong. The one thing “Faith” has it it’s really hard to disprove. Can you disprove there is a God? Can you disprove that Jesus rose from the Grave? As scientists love to say, just b/c you can’t prove something, doesn’t mean it isn’t correct.
You’re mixing up science and pseudoscience, it sounds like.
PS: Can you disprove that I have goblins in my sock drawer? First one to do so wins a lone sock.
All hail the Goblin of the Sock Drawer! For He is wise and not a total douche like the Goblin of the Underwear Drawer.
My sock drawer IS my underwear drawer. Jane, he’s clearly GOLLUM!
That’s ’cause you’re a dude. Women need two drawers for their socks and underwear. And sometimes a whole ‘nother drawer for bras. Most women anyway.
Mine’s a sock+underwear+bras+ropes drawer.
The goblins only steal the socks though!
Just how big is this drawer?
So what’s the bra goblin like? Do they only steal in pairs?
Goblin’ bras?
*raises ears*
Yeah, mine fits my socks, underwear, and warm pants for sleeping.
@Jane:
Not as big as it sounds! I don’t own much of either sort. There is still plenty of room for goblins (apparently).
Isn’t that what my bedroom floor is for?
Actually, Jane, my wife keeps all of the above in one drawer. It’s a full drawer, but it’s all in one drawer.
Is she buddies with Brittney and Lindsay?
My girl has six (SIX!) drawers for what she calls “lingerie”. Keep in mind, this includes bras, undies, stockings, garter belts, nighties, teddies, and all the other magical things women put on so we can take it off. I never EVER open those drawers. It’s too fun waiting to see what comes out for my delight.
Ivan, is it weird if that turned me on a little, even though it was said by a man?
Yes it is. You are a flaming faggot.
:nope:
:exclaim:
WARNING! ABOVE MATERIAL CONTAINS EXTREMELY HOMOSEXUAL CONTENT! Spoiler Alert!
Why my symbol no workie?
no se.
No Tyler, not weird at all. I got turned on TYPING it!
Note to self. Kick DT’s ass.
2nd Note to self: I don’t know where DT lives. Just call him an ass and be done with it.
Hmmmm, maybe my drawers are too small. Of course, my bras take up a lot of room just because they don’t fold easily.
Dang Jane, women need a closet for their socks and underwear. Then another closet for shoes, and finally a closet for the rest of their clothes. The dresser is for nick nacks, old love letters, and such..
Despite all the documentary evidence to the contrary, the Medievil Warm and Little Ice Age did not happen, because they are not in the hockey stick that is the “evidence” of AGW. Also, in this context, the hockey stick does start about the same time as the widespread use of mercury thermometers rather than inferred measurement as the primary source of temperature records.
If you’ve believed 3 impossible things this morning, why not finish off with breakfast at Milliways, the restaurant at the End of the Universe!?
Paws: Why is it impossible? Also I never said I believed them. This is the problem I do have with the “sceince” based world. It can be as belittling as the “faith” based world. Paws where did the Universe start? Physics/ Biology tells us that matter can neither be created nor destroyed, so how did matter come to exist? Also we were taught, something in motion will stay in motion. Well how come we havn’t collided with another Universe? Are all Universes traveling through space at the same speed?
To speak to the little Ice Age. I couldn’t tell if you were being sarcastic or not. But I believe science has proven that it has happened. And it happened prior to the Industrial Revolution, so it could possibly be that it’s the natural cycle of things. To ask a question of the “Global Warming” folks, where are the pockets of higher CO2 above the cities? You would think the places that release the most green house gases would have a higher concentration of such gases in the environment, however science has not found that to be true.
To the Pseudo Science question: If it’s psuedoscience, why is it then touted as proof in todya’s society. IE Global Warming is still a psuedoscience, yet if I say that I will have thousands of people saying I’m wrong, yet no one can really generate enough proof that Global Warming is caused by mankind. It’s more “faith” based or if this than that… however this has no tru definition to that.
I’m not sure it’s a pseudoscience if they could only find 230 scientists in the entire world to say “Global Warming isn’t real.”
{http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudoscience}
The scientific method has been followed.
Em, so you know for a fact that every scientist in the World was actually asked their opinion of AGW in an anonymous poll? I actually know several scientists, and the only one who was asked was an “environmental chemist”; can you say “vested interest lobby”?
“”The term ‘pseudoscience’ has become little more than an inflammatory buzzword for quickly dismissing one’s opponents in media sound-bites”"
My serious point is that the “start of AGW” co-incides with a change in measuring techniques, and the previous measuring techniques don’t show well-documented events, so all the “hockey stick” actually shows is the change in measuring techniques.
Yeah… Science, instead of Pseudoscience. Science isn’t unproven opinions- It’s theories that have withstood the scientific processes of the scientific community for years, have been researched thoroughly, etc. And in regards to your global warming comments, the reason the conclusions seem illogical is because the commonly held belief by scientists is this: The rising temperature due to human pollution would cause the ice caps to melt, which would cause the salinity of the ocean to decrease, which would naturally cause the air currents to change (It’s been proven that that would happen, should the ice caps melt- the hot/cold air tends to sink/rise and follow different paths according to the various levels of salt in the ocean.) And that would cause an Ice Age, due to the falling temperature. Not making an argument, just clarifying the theories you’re referring to.
Tyler: See above about Pseudoscience and Global Warming. However science is ever changing. Time and time again theories have been proven wrong and or changed. And to your Ice Caps melting = Ice Age “hypothesis”. You can time and time again do a caluculated model or simulated model in a computer or bath tub, but in real life it could be different. We will not know if it’s an Ice Age until it happens, then it is proven. What is proven is that the computer generated models, and or experiments in pools create such results, that is it. As an engineer time and time again we “calculate” it should work this way, and time and time again we need to change the concept when the real world happens.
True, but you can’t call everything that hasn’t happened yet a pseudoscience. A pseudoscience is a scientific theory or practice that hasn’t followed the scientific method and tries to appear legitimate. {http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudoscience}
Read first paragraph please.
Uh, yeah, if it happens, then it’s too late. We won’t be able to go, “Whoops. That’s no good. Guess we’d better start doing better now!” Nope, too late. Better safe then sorry, you know.
*cough* you sound like an agnostic *cough*
I’m an agnostic. Am I a bad person, Deep?
An agnostic is rowing his boat on Loch Ness when he spots the infamous huge monster moving straight at him. As Nessie towers and lunges at him, the agnostic shouts, “Please God, help me!” Time freezes. A voice from heaven asks, “Why should I help you now? You didn’t even believe in me five seconds ago.” The agnostic replies, “Hey, give me a break. Five seconds ago, I didn’t believe in the Loch Ness Monster, either!”
Heheheh… It’s not that agnostics don’t believe in God, Deep, it’s just that they don’t claim to know everything about him or whatever’s up there controlling the universe. Still, though, good joke
.
Yeah, I would say that joke is more for atheists than agnostics.
a.One who believes that it is impossible to know whether there is a God.
b.One who is skeptical about the existence of God but does not profess true atheism.
2.One who is doubtful or noncommittal about something.
I do? I don’t get it.
Well what happens if trying to prevent it from happening, makes things worse? Remember the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. (Note some sarcasm). I think it’s funny how some liberals want to take the proactive action on the environment, but not against terrorism.
How on earth are the two things related?
In the same way that you have to be for capital punishment if you’re pro choice and vice versa!
They aren’t related. I’m just saying how you plan to be proactive against what I believe is a pseudoscience, but not against a proven threat. That’s all. Let me caviate, not ALL Liberals are like that. I should say the Liberal agenda, which not every liberal subscribes 100% to. Just lik eI don’t subscribe ot the 100% conservative agenda.
-Headdesk-
It’s like discussing with a Poe’s lawyer sometimes, ILPB. :/
Man, I’ve LINKED you the definition of pseudoscience, there are only 230 lawyers in the world who disagree with the theory of global warming, it’s not considered pseudoscience if it is accepted by the large majority of the scientific community and has extensive evidence. Disbelieve it, if you like, but don’t dismiss it by calling it a “pseudoscience.”
@ Tyler: Well, probably more than that many lawyers, but then, we’re not normally the go-to source on climate and atmosphere.
Tyler: Once again. Since there are people out there that do not believe in Global Warming, which has not necesarily been proven beyond a shaodw of a doubt (trust me I’ve researched some of this myself) that it is b/c of man. We only recently started to “track” the temperature of the Earth for the last 120 years or so. How old is the earth? Billions of years old? Yet we’re going to make a snap judgement on about 120 years of trends? When an elliptical orbit around the sun is thousands of years? Well let’s see the 120 years equates to about 1 nano second of your life. So for a nano-second I met you, youwere an ass, so scienctifically proving you’re an ass? Doesn’t hold water with me. How do we know the Earth doesn’t release carbon from Volcanoes at a higher rate as we near the sun (gravitationl pull?, just a hypothesis nt proven yet).
Since we’ve been cooling since 2005, does that mean Global Warming has gone into the colling effect and we should be expeting an Ice Age soon? I thought it was a rapid shift in climate. (DAMN you Day aFter Tomorrow, you got my hopes up!!!)
When the proof that is shown, can be debunked (and it has by those lawyers, I mean scientists) then it is not proven to me, and hence pseudoscience. Yes you linked it to me, and I read the definition. Once again, just b/c I don’t agree with you, does it mean I’m wrong. I don’t think you’re exactlly wrong, keep driving your Prius, and I’ll get my Hummer (real cheap now).
Can’t lawyers just get a judge to order the stoppage of all global warming? That would be cool.
@ Eric: I’m sorry, but the amount of hot air we would produce in doing that would outweigh any improvement that the court order would create.
You know what, ILPB, even if global warming *isn’t* happening, there’s no harm in the environmental steps that have been suggested. And since you brought it up, low gas mileage cars are an excellent example of this. Oil is not a renewable resource, so why do we keep using it on gas guzzling SUVs and such like it’s never going to run out? Certainly there’s no harm in actually trying to take care of the planet. And that way, whether global warming is real or not, we’re doing something good. Now, if we do everything we can to stop global warming, and we end up with major climate changes anyway, then we can say “Okay, I guess you were right.” But in the meantime, I’d rather try to protect the planet than just say “I don’t buy it, so let’s go waste some gas!”
*shakes head sadly*
Wasting gas is an epic crime.
*wanders to watercooler to fart on unsuspecting coworker*
@Eric:
“even if global warming *isn’t* happening, there’s no harm in the environmental steps that have been suggested”
I do wish this was true. On the whole I think it is mainly correct, but some new environment-friendly laws here are rather nutty. The EU has decided that lightbulbs are out because we must save energy, so they become illegal to sell soonish. Instead it’s the energy-saving bulbs that are the Modern Answer. Great, except that… Most of them contain mercury, and we don’t really have much of an energy shortage in Sweden, but we don’t have large enough “electricity pipelines” leaving the country to be able to sell the excess power to mainland Europe.
So, thanks to energy saving laws we, locally, need to behave in a way that is worse for the environment, at least until non-mercury energy-saving bulbs are a viable alternative.
But besides glitches like this (and some of the ethanol-production that’s also just wonky), which I really hope are just silly knee jerk reactions and will get sorted out fairly soon, I agree with you – the way the world looks today we need to start making changes to our ways of life, global warming or not.
diss–Can you file some sort of injunction against yourselves?
(I don’t really know what that means. I’ve just watched a lot of Law & Order.)
@ Eric: That sounds….dirty.
Eric: I don’t mind about trying to find other resources to use in cars, it’s just that everytime a “new” fix shows up it turns out not to be ideal for the environment. For example going to use Ethanol, OOPS that failed. Or Hybrid cars, what do we do with the left over fluid in the fuel cell when it’s burned out? That’s not healthy for the environment either. I never said caring for mother earth is a bad thing, I just don’t believe in Global Warming as much as some others do. I also know that Obama’s “Energy Plan” will end up costing us dearly, and it isn’t a proven fix. Hey I’m cheap, I turn off my ligths when I leave the room, unplug appliances (except stove, fridge, TVs (gotta keep the presets) and alarm clocks) when I’m not using them, but I’d rather that be my choice not the governments. How about we go more to nuclear energy, 100 years without refueling? Then we could blast the nuclear waste into the sun. I love nature and hate to see it trashed, but I’m also a realist and in today’s world the “Global Warming” scare will cause out politicians to do stupid things AGAIN!
My worries exactly. About 95% of the time when people decide they need to “fix” something that’s wrong with the earth/environment, it goes at best somewhat awry and at worst totally FUBAR. (Channelization and levees for flood control being an example.)
However, that said, we don’t tend to do as badly with just trying not to screw things up worse or clean up what we’ve messed up already, an example being the efforts to reduce air and water pollution. You so rarely hear of a river catching fire anymore.
Rare, Diss? You must not live in Hell, with Tyler. There’s a lake FULL of fire here.
Lol…yes, it feeds into the lake of fire, right?
But for reals, rivers used to catch fire because of pollution; notably the Cuyahoga River although it wasn’t the only one. {http://pratie.blogspot.com/2005/03/cuyahoga-river-fire-of-1969.html}
The river of fire feeds into the lake, that is…
Comment typing fail.
Where do bad people go when they die?
They don’t go to heaven where the angels fly.
They go to a lake of fire and fry.
See them again til the 4th of July!!!!
A lake of fire? Cool, I love hot baths.
I think people need a topic other than the trolls and Obama’s citizenship so here’s one: It looks as if Kim Jong’s hair is running away from his face in this picture.
His hair is perfect. It is the epitome of hair; the very peak of…hair-ness.
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You, on the other hand, will be dealt with.
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Have a nice day.:|
…!!11!Wait!1!! Wait!11!! I didn’t get pinnacle or paramount or nonpareil in the description! Let me add it!1!!!1! It will just take a second and I’ll…
.
*urk*
Heh, heh. The Chonger. So much evil packed into such a little man.
wait… he might have been right about that one. Ooops.
My birth certificate is from Kentucky and is a small plastic card the same size as a credit card. It fits in my wallet. It contains no registrar stamp or embossing or hologram or anything else making it “official.” Does this mean I was born in Nigeria? Please help, I’m concerned.
Yes. Yes you were. Please start an email scam right away, thanks.
No, it just means that you were not born in the USA.
Nope. You were born in Kenya. Get it right.
You, Morte, are a terrorist. Probably a Nigerian one. Who knows. Please step into the line for crucifiction, to the left there.
I love how every picture having to do with Obama turns into a war between retards, and the rest of society. There are so many anti-obama people its hilarious. The nonsense they come up with never fails to make me laugh. Keep up the good work please.
*DO NOT ENCOURAGE THE TROLLS*
You’re only making them stronger when you encourage them. It’s more effective to bash them, even though they like it, it doesn’t make them feel vindicated.
There’s 99,999 Erics? Which one am I?
The Saint from the great state of Louis, obviously!
Translation- the 42nd.
You realize Louis isn’t a state, right? But Eric, now that’s a state of mind…
I know, Eric, I just like to call you The Great Saint Eric Of Louis.
It sounds like you wear white robes and have a beard…
What State of Mind is that Baffled, Lost, or Godlike?
Saintly.
All of the above. At the same time.
He is awesome… I like his look
Kim Jong “Mentally” Ill and Adolf Obama are two fascists in a pod.
Besides, why would Adolf care? He was born in Kenya.
Dammit, Jane let another one out. I swear, they’re parrots that all sound exactly the same.
Plus, even if he WAS, how the hell would that affect his opinion on bombing Hawaii? You know, where he actually grew up most of the time?
It’s b/c of the rise of Pirates!!! DAMN those pirates…. next they’ll be saying ARRGGG!!! He’s from Kenya you land luber!!!
Meheheheh… Land Luber… Love it. Love anything with the word lube in it, really.
Quick to the retard Cave!!!!!
Wipe the Hannity sauce off your chin. Also, you might want to get the hole in the back of your pants fixed, I can see the rash from over here.
Oh, and please remove the tinfoil hat from your head, which is jammed so far up your ass it seems to have actually entered your large intestine. To be fair and inoffensive to you, of course, I’ll claim that your large intestine lines the far *right* side of your stomach. Your head’s in the right place, at least, near the center, of your body, but if your basic emotions were your entire brain, you’d be swallowing your appendix right now.
That last bit was kind of a stretch; I apologize if I made you actually exercise your brain in an attempt to understand the insult I was making, whereas you’d rather just listen to the voices and listen to whatever all eight of the paranoid schizophrenics up there tell you.
hey now… some of us paranoid schizophrenics read this and dont need to be compared to nutjobs. i’ve got voices in my head, but none of them seem to care about where the president was born.
Just makes you a better ’schizo, buddy.
Why does he not just release copy of birth certificate to all news people (and college records) so no more argument? BUT HE WILL NOT!
YOU ARE A NUTBAG!
Man: I would like a hot fudge sundae with nuts on top.
Waitress: Would you like your nuts crushed?
Man: Would you like your tits squeezed?
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Sorry, couldn’t resist..
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@NSIF: Are you fscking wankstain or what? You could have saved yourself some abuse by simply reading through the comments. Or is that too much inforation for your peabrain to take in?
BUT HE ALREADY HAS, YOU BLOODY SHITE-CRAZED NUTTER!
Then show me where.
Liberals-
Attempt to stifle free speech and questions- check
No tolerance of other opinions-check.
Insulting and persecuting minorities- check
Defending illegally elected leader- check.
Yes- just like Old Country.
Yay. You don’t even understand that I’m mocking the last part of your post. You’re an idiot. I’m not even going to bash you, it’d just be to easy based on the fact that you’ve got a soft spot on your head from your mother dropping you and obviously crushing your brain in the fall.
still no girlfriend?
No. You still hoping I’m available? Cause I’m straight, and that kinda thing just wouldn’t work out.
First of all if he was Hawaii then show a birth certificate. Second all Obama isn’t GOING TO DO ANYTHING!
He has shown his birth certificate. End conversation.
No he hasn’t in fact the Hawaii Governor sealed it. Now end conversation.
Actually there are pictures of it and it has been shown to the media more than once there’s even links to up-close pictures of it. Christ on a jet-ski, you’re annoying.
It was a Certificate of Live Birth not the Birth Certificate. Actually two seperate things.
If you want an argument, scroll up. Not going to get into this debate again.
Good then be quiet.
I tell you I’m not arguing with you, and you really had to post again telling me to be quiet didn’t you? His mother was an American citizen at the time of birth. Therefore he is, no matter where he may be born, which I still firmly believe was Hawaii. Read the other 4000000 posts concerning this argument, good night.
I’m not questioning his American citizenship. i question his natural born citizenship which is required for the current job he is destroying American with. I’m not keeping you up.