World hide and seek
World hide and seek champion
(Osama Bin Laden)
Picture by: dunno source via Our LOL Builder. Caption by: dunno source
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How can we not find a man who has to have dialysis multiple times a week in Pakistan?
Oh, that’s right. Pakistan has a weak gov’t that harbours terrorists. Carry on.
Or he’s already dead and the government/media still uses him as a figurehead since Saddam was publicly executed and they’re still desperately trying to maintain some sort front so they can continue their agenda of mass genocide for fossil fuels.
I don’t think he’s dead…but his health can’t be good. Cave Dialysis is a risky proposition. We need to train a team of gun-toting spelunking doctors…
“I don’t think he’s dead”
I don’t have the slightest idea, but remember the Pakistani female political leader assasinated in the bomb blast last year or the year before? She was recorded shortly before her death talking about the major players in the tribal regions, and at one point mentions one guy and describes him as the “one who murder Bin Laden”. I’ve been wondering ever since whether we are the last nation on earth to find out he’s been dead for a while, and who exactly had her murdered…
Benezir Bhutto and Omar Sheikh, respectively.
TY!
i.e. Sandra Oh, George Clooney, and Hugh Laurie? Done.
Eh, heard it. If your gonna rant ya gotta add some Zazz it! Here try: He’s just a space alien and the government it keeping him locked up until he releases his secrete Cheese formula, which is a super hybrid of swiss and blue, only it makes you fart glitter!
Hey, at least its original.
Does anyone really want to see him secrete cheese?
I loled.
No, but you will eat it not knowing where it came from.
No no…..ALWAYS check your cheese before you chow it down. Like my Mom always said, “Son, always check your cheese. You’ll be glad you did.” Does anyone remember the first time you had cheese?
i do. but that’s because i was 18. lactose intolerant and without a medication that allowed me to eat milk products until then.
i hated it at first. the texture is just weird. but what’s even weirder is the texture of yogurt if you’ve never had it before. there is nothing else in the food world with that same texture. NOTHING.
ROFL! I SOOOO wanna go here…
so that explains limberger cheese (minus the glitter)
…Just sounds so educated…
You realize that “genocide” has a strict definition, right? It’s not one of those words like “right-wing”, “Bill O’Reilly”, or “the Detroit Lions” that you can just throw around when you don’t like something — the thing you’re referring to actually has to meet the definition. So, since the Iraqi people are not, in whole or in part, being systematically destroyed, it’s not actually genocide. Understand?
Go back and poke holes in the moon landing, you wacko.
Dude, get serious, there is not one shred of conclusive evidence that the Detroit Lions actually exist!
I should have been more specific. After last season, there’s no question that the Lions exist, albeit in a parallel dimension of suck. But Lions *fans* — good luck finding some of those.
i know some of them… they’re a lonely group of people.
although, as a browns fan i owe the lions a lot of love… they made my team look “not terrible”. any time someone bashed the browns the canned response was “at least we’re not the lions”.
You might want to ask, oh Iraqii Kurds or Iraqii Marsh Arabs, who was trying to commit genocide in Iraq and when.
And incidentally, “mass genocide” is tautology unless you intended to suggest (probably state sponsored) murder of multiple racial and/or religious groups.
Isn’t “mass” “genocide” more of a redundancy?
Excellent point.
Issued in a memo from the Department of Redundancy Department.
they ought to add a new page to ichc that is that or something similar to it.
Not if you consider the possibility of commiting genocide against a group that there’s just not that many of. Like detroit lions fans.
Sort of like a sinister version of Weekend at Bernie’s?
He’s probably either already dead or our people have some dirty deals going on with the group(s) harboring him. Either way, we need someone to trot out every so often for our Two Minutes’ Hate and a top hat-wearing capitalist isn’t the image our government and media wants us to identify with evil.
fwiw – do a google search on ‘bush connections to bin laden’
some sites are leftist crackpot conspiracy sites, but there are also many reputable sites that provide sources for some amazing ties….
where is osama? has anyone really seached the crawford ranch?
And he’s 6′4, missing a few toes, and walks with a cane…. how hard is that to find?
Isn’t Pakistan a republican/conservative/libertarian ideal? No taxes, no gun control, no labor laws, no EPA tellin’ you how much you’re allowed to pollute, no minimum wage… man, why aren’t you guys moving there en masse? Is it all the brown people?
That must be it Mark…
Ouch.
No Christianity.
They could take that with them. Must be the brown people.
LOL
You people of the west cannot find him because we have denied your access within our borders. Sure, you can sneak your secret agents into our borders with your spy planes or spy on our lands with your advanced satelite system. But if you do capture Osama bin Laden on our soil, you will be condemned by the world for intruding our borders.
HA! Everyone knows where Osama bin Laden is, but you are not going to catch him without devastated consequences!
Am I the only one who wants to vomit upon sight of this repulse pond scum sucking (insert swear word here)?
I dont, but thats only because I use the picture as a dart board
such a good idea!
What do you feel for those that trained him?
He’s a financier and organizational leader, not a mujaheddin, so the whole “who trained him?” question probably doesn’t apply in the way you mean.
Unless you’re alleging that Operation Cyclone did more than just pass money to the Pakistanis, or funneled any money to non-Afghanis, in which case, I’d like to see your evidence…
Now heres my advice for dealing with the guy. Instead of killin’ him, we lock him in a stockade and each and every morning we have him anally raped by a farm animal.
No pigs though, he’s done enough screwing around with islamic imagery.
Even better — we topple his host government, kill most of his lieutenants, go after his movement around the world, and drive him so far underground that he becomes disconnected and irrelevant.
Oh, wait…
Still, I’m not saying I don’t want to see his preserved head on a pike in the Ellipse — that’s a symbol even the most barbaric can understand.
Wowza, no one likes the O man? I think he’s hilarious, and word has it, for a crazy islamofascist, quite popular with the ladies.
Don’t take that lot so seriously, yanks, they believe that Mohammed wrote the hadiths : P
Ya know, there are rare moments where the clouds part and we see eye to eye. This is one of those moments. We haven’t had a head on a pike in quite a while. I think we are past due for one.
Not since I redecorated Max’s Fortress of Doom anyways.
Ah yes, that was a really good day and the screaming was just heavenly. ^_^
i have the feeling that you put max’s head on that pike. he’s not been around since the re-decoration…
*suspicious*
Her Ladyship should not be questioned as he was away while she decorated and I have been there many times. None of the heads are his.
*makes note to go home and burn personal collection*
you people are so predictable and ordinary!
dress him in traditional womens clothing (minus the burka), superglue his lips to a captured suicide bomber’s (who failed btw) wang, then drop them both into the street in front of the biggest, most conservative mosque in tehran 15 min before evening prayer
While some of the ideas for giving Osama what he deserves are admittedly quite amusing, I have to disagree with, well all of them. If or when, depending on your level of optimism, he’s captured, he should be given a fair trial, then be executed like a common criminal. No making a big deal out of it. No making him into a martyr. Just a private, non televised room with someone sticking a needle in his arm, or pulling a switch, or whatever. The elaborate public executions? That’s how he’d no doubt want to be executed, in such a manner that lets his followers point at us and say “See? The americans call us barbarians, yet they are just as barbaric as they claim we are” And they’d be justified in saying that. More of the world would hate us. Someone would rise up to take Bin Laden’s place, and we’d be right back where we started. Is that REALLY what anyone wants?
The very worst thing you could do to him would be to treat him like some second class drug mule caught with fifty bucks worth of heroin- lock him up, with no admirers, and make sure he lives a long life in prison. Treat him well and let the fence sitters who haven’t yet joined Al Quaeda think that we might be a better alternative than radical islamic clerics.
Awwww, can’t we at least put him in general population with someone who’ll stretch his bunghole for him?
Yeah, that’ll show the world how morally superior the west is…
Let one guy endure horrors a fraction less than the horrors he inflicted. I don’t recall anything being said about moral superiority as moral superiority is a farting contest to see who stinks the most.
Well, an idea of moral superiority seems to be what allows the right wing troll population to take joy in killing whoever they feel like…
Yet all three guys in the thread you responded to aren’t right wing… So your statement means what exactly?
But I see where this argument goes and thus I won’t bother with it. You accept only a black and white truth while I see a world of gray. So let’s cut to the chase.
Moral superiority is a farting contest, even if you win, you still smell.
Just something that is awful in general, not directed as an attack on anyone on this thread in particular. I didn’t like to see left-wing folk nearing it, even in humour, and Slan’s post seemed a convenient place to say something.
Also, you’ll smell if you try and prove your moral superiority but leading by example can’t hurt…
e.g. Getting rid of your nukes before whining about anyone else’s rather than trying to justify why you’re allowed them…
I will totally get right on getting rid of the nukes in my basement… Making the argument about nuclear disarmament to the group who isn’t for nuclear armament is preaching to the choir and a tad obnoxious.
You have a point but it is a “Well Duh” point that we already realize. And by We, I mean the dips lurking here posting inbetween doing actual work.
I’m sorry, I will always believe that if the other guy has a nuke, we should have a bigger one. You’ve got crazy little dictators in other countries who don’t understand anything but a bigger gun because that’s their culture and what they’ve been taught their whole lives, and saying that we will get rid of ours first to lead by example will only allow them to laugh at the fact that we are the first kid on the playground to lay down for the bully. Reagan’s itchy trigger finger is my hero.
Amen. The world was a more innocent place when it was bipolar with only two fingers on buttons.
Ever since it got all schizo’d and MPD’d with more scrabbly little button fingering, I’ve had teh scared.
Teh Cold War. I miss it.
I have to disagree froofrou. If the other guy has a nuke, we should have a way of shooting it down.
We do have that capability. Star Wars. Once again, Reagan is The Man.
I’m going to have to concede this one because I’ve been lazy a bit and I really don’t know what the status of SDI is. I don’t THINK it’s up and running, but I’m not sure so I’m not going to make any claims.
I dont’ think it’s up and running, but that doesn’t make it any less of teh awsum as far as the safety of the country goes. We need SDI and a bigger nuke, and someone with an itchy trigger finger at the helm. The evil dictators of the world who only understand strength as opposed to diplomacy need to think that we will level them and put in the next Wal-Mart where their country used to be. That’s not to say we can’t be diplomatic where it is warranted, but I highly doubt Kim Jung Il or Achmey are doing anything but laughing at us behind their perfectly manicured hands while we flounder about trying to play nice.
We should have the nukes. We should have the way to defend against nukes. And we should have the wisdom to not use them unless all other avenues have been exhausted
no no no… if he’s as big on his religion as he claims, just chain him to a wall and shave his religiously-grown beard off, and keep him clean-shaven every week or so
I’m supposed to “love my enemies”. My enemies, yes…but not the world’s enemies. >;) That means I’ll chuck some Bibles at Osama! :p
Comparative religion 101 FAIL
Love all enemies. Remember they are sentient beings, just like you. Finite beings in an infinite universe. Love the sinner, hate the sin, and understand that the perpetrator of sin is a victim too. Have equal compassion for everyone, from Hitler to the Dalai Lama. I mean, if you get a chance to go back in time and shoot Hitler in the face when he was still a lousy art student, take it, but don’t hate him. I would even say, “Sorry, I know you have no idea why I’m about to kill you, but let me assure you it’s for a good cause.”
Do not harbor hate for your enemies, Altir, such thoughts are poison…
Such thoughts are a waste of energy better devoted to your purpose. Amirite?
I am so making a pile of badly accented European guards when I get home…
From what I understand, it would have been to the benefit of the art world!
Madeline McCann challenges him!
What somebody needs to do, is secretly get into Sallie Mae’s college division, and add his name in as defaulting on a $30,000 dollar student loan. Then I bet they would find him.
WIN!
Love it!
Depressingly true!
Give him a sex change and force him to live the rest of his life as an Islamic woman.
LOL
yeah under thoose medieval
More like he shaved, put on a suit and traded on Wall Street…Wait! that was before the stock market tanked…Sorry I don’t know where he is now.
No I am the champion!!
(or did anybody found me? i guess not!)
You dont even have a picture of me!!
I thought the champion was Anne Frank?
I was going to say something along those lines. Anne Frank FTW!
She was the World Hide and Seek champ from 6 July 1942 to 4 August 1944.
Osama Bin Laden has been the world champ since September 11, 2001 to present time.
Um no, she was found within two years. Osama yo Mama has been gone since 2001 like Bix said.
And no one was looking for her, specifically.
True, she was found on accident.
Damn diary, always blabbing.
Osama is hiding inside the Pentagon
Osama is hiding under the Resolute desk…
Well, he is a secret Muslim, right? Very sneaky…
Osama’s been on hold with Dell Customer Support since November 2001. However, he has been assured that their call is very important to them, and I’m sure they’ll get to him soon.
WIN!
he stands a better chance than i do at understanding their accent though.
i HATE calling them, being on hold for a half hour and then getting “karen” on the phone and karen has an accent so freaking thick i can barely tell it’s english. then the things karen tells me to do are all things that have already been tried and failed but “please try it again for me”. and finally after 50 minutes on with karen she tells me “i can not help you. please call this number for our such-and such support” and it starts all over again.
with as many unemployed americans out there… can we start putting call centers back in the US???? PLEASE!?
/rant
They moved a number of jobs out of the country at my work and tried to convince us that it wasn’t outsourced as they are multinational so it was just moving assets around.
I am sure the new call center made in Guatamala is just moved assets…
i work at an insurance company… we’re small, not anyone you’d ever have heard of. we have our call center, literally, down the hall from my office. the last handful of clients that we’ve won it’s been *because* we do not outsource and everyone you get on the phone is completely 100% fluent in english. we’ve stolen clients away from our competitors and part of it is that the CSRs speak the bloody language.
in your situation though, i’d suggest moving to guatemala. they’ll eventually “move all the assets” there. plus it’s warmer and prettier than iowa (i got that right, right?)… and i’ll bet they’ve got their own variety of kink down there for you and lynn to pick up on!
Nah, I plan to move on if they don’t hire me on here since I am still a temp right now. I am not in the mood to play games with HR.
As for Guatamala, I would prefer to stay out of the South American area. It’s cheaper down there for a reason and I prefer to avoid it.
And I can see how your company would steal people away. Hell, maybe I should move to your state and apply…
only move here and apply if you really hate your life. and i mean REALLY.
the work environment is toxic. we do a great job for our customers but the turnover rate is over 25% because the actual employees all hate each other. i’ve been here a year and a half and as much as i’m grateful to have a job i’m hoping to not be here for a 2 year anniversary. or at least not in this capacity. the people i work with currently could have made mother theresa want to cause them immense physical harm.
Eh, we could make it pleasant for each other. We would have somebody to talk to who wasn’t a complete idiot. *has pieces missing still*
plus i get the distinct feeling that plotting the demise of everyone else working here would be a lot more fun with another person to plot with. currently, i feel like milton… except my stapler is black and it jams all the time.
It usually is. We could collaborate on torture techniques, methods of disposal, what arbitrary lists of rules we could come up with in a game of pitting them against each other as competitive food sources in some underground maze…
torture for the 2 blondes i share an office with would be pretty easy. “you see this big mac with fries and a regular coke? if you don’t do what i want you to do, i’ll force you to eat the WHOLE thing. it’s 1245673 calories!”
they’d cave. so not only are they evil, they’re totally vapid too.
I might be able to do one better. Drop them into a hole with nothing but each other, a mirror, and a supply of cheeseburgers and soft drinks.
To live they must eat fatter foods and they can’t escape the mirror or each other.
Then we can place bets on who breaks the mirror or kills the other. Sure they will thrive for a while but that is where the patience comes into it.
But I like your idea if we want to extort them.
the one (i’m not even exaggerating) only eats pretzels and only drinks diet coke, from the can.
i’ve never seen her drink water or coffee or tea or lemonade or anything else. diet coke from the can. and on her desk at this exact moment are 2 family size bags of pretzels. both are open. she’s probably 5′5″ and 105lbs on a fat day. she’s probably got an ulcer the size of france from the diet coke and she’s got to be perpetually hungry…
Perfect… *temples fingers and grins wickedly*
if i didn’t know you were quite a bit younger than this… i would definitely picture you like mr. burns.
I’m ahead of my time with levels of spite, malice, and diabolical ways of thinking out torture.
I have heard that Costa Rica is pretty nice. Maybe you could telecommute?
[link] to Foamy the Squirrel on this topic.
i will have to watch that at home. my officemates can’t tell i’m goofing off when i’m typing. when i’m giggling at a cartoon squirrel it’s just a little too obvious.
haven’t watched foamy in a LONG time though.
At the “hiding under the resolute desk” comment. He’s not been under there since the Clinton Administration.
I hear he’s hiding in one of three places:
Your living room couch (you find a lot of stuff in there)
Among the cast of Mad TV
The Disney Small World ride
can’t be behind the sofa, that’s where beejeebuz keeps turning up
(they’re not the same person are they?)
Osama is hiding from Chuck Norris
Wouldn’t you? The last thing you want is Chuck pissed off at you..
Sorry eddie, Chuck may be badass, but he aint’ got nuthin on William Shatner OR Samuel L Jackson.
Chuck Norris chewed both of them up and spit them out. Shatner is Teh Awsum, but Chuck Norris laughs in the face of awsum.
Really to determine if Chuck or Bill are more awesome comes down to who’s cooler out of Bruce Lee and Malcolm McDowell. Seeing as that is what it takes, respectively, to kill each of them. And Malcolm is in Fallout 3 so he gets my vote.
Granted, you have a point, but I’ve yet to see Shatner try to secede and create his own country
(as an aside, Malcolm McDowell basks in his own sort of awsum)
The only way to measure who wins between Chuck and Bill is to look at what it takes to kill them. Bruce Lee and Malcolm Mcdowell, respectively. Between the two Malcolm gets my vote because nobody does evil like Malcolm. Plus being in Fallout 3 doesn’t hurt.
Okay i’ve tried replying to this twice, and it got eaten both times so i’m going to give the short version of the post. William Shatner is cooler than Chuck Norris because Malcolm Mcdowell is pure evil.
no hes hiding up Perez Hilton ass cause they are both gay and both terrorists death to both of them
i see someone didn’t give you your thrice daily dose of haldol…
its actually Quetiapine and if i wasn’t dosed up on that i’d grab a gun and blow all osma’s cousins away myself just get an m-16 and head to a mosque. That and if i can find my way out of this damn padded room
I want you to think really hard, it may hurt your head a bit…But do you remember how you get there?
LMFAO!
i do believe anne frank did better. and that there are a few more wanna bee b-tards here than i thought.
“that there are a few more wanna bee b-tards here than i thought.”
….you’re surprised by that maybe?
It’s easy to hide if you’re dead.
Sock puppet kept under Dick Cheney’s desk and pulled out so they could go BOOGEYMAN WUHH!!! Every couple of weeks. Fallen into disuse under new administration.
If he’s the World Champion in Hide and Seek, then perhaps the Ministry of Silly Walks should be placed in charge of finding him.
Why do we need to seek him out and destroy him when Pakistan has made a deal to allow the Taliban rule in tribal areas? I mean I’m not saying attack Pakistan since India’s right next door and I rather like India.
Besides I think its time we begin wondering why Bin Laden hates us? I mean I don’t think it’s for an entirely unfounded reason.
LOL the champion of hide & seek is OSAMA BIN LADEN
nice nice *stumbl’d*
I like meows idea!
hahahahahahaha
You people of the west cannot find him because we have denied your access within our borders. Sure, you can sneak your secret agents into our borders with your spy planes or spy on our lands with your advanced satelite system. But if you do capture Osama bin Laden on our soil, you will be condemned by the world for intruding our borders.
why dont you all stay within your borders instead of driving our taxis trying to rape our women and refusing to wear our deoderant? If you b’tards would all f%ck off back to the middle east and hump your camels the world would be a better place. osama bin laden is a paedophile he’s hanging round some raghead kindergarden
Hey, don’t mock our great prophet Mr. Honorable Osama bin Laden, peace be upon him. Wait, never mind… he isn’t dead yet.
Yeah, you will never find him! You infidels of the west. He will probably die within our borders and rise up like the great Mohammad did in Jerusalem. When Mr. Honorable Osama bin Laden dies, our land will become prosperous with virgins and lil’ boys.
LOL everyone is looking in the wrong place. He shaved his beard and moved to SA.
Olly olly oxen free!
maybe osama’s just an idea. a front used by the terrorists to scare ppl