An Inconvenient Truth:
An Inconvenient Truth: Big Macs cause chubby
(Al Gore)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: mmaddogg
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Cheezburger Network Blog
FIRST !
And you know what, I’d have been first if I hadn’t typed more than 7 f’ng characters, you living waste of (small amounts of) bandwidth.
trolls. what are we going to do with them?
I say either flamebroil them or have them rotisserie style.
lols they’re tasty with mustard!
I got a couple more in the closet here. And we’re beginning to beat them away from the door. I suggest we start playing The Beatles until they leave.
Body composition (particularly body fat percentage) can be measured in several ways. The most common method is by using a set of measurement calipers to measure the thickness of subcutaneous fat in multiple places on the body. This includes the abdominal area, the subscapular region, arms, buttocks and thighs. These measurements are then used to estimate total body fat with a margin of error of approximately four percentage points.
Another method is bioelectrical impedance analysis (BIA), which uses the resistance of electrical flow through the body to estimate body fat.
A more accurate but less convenient method is using a large tank of water to measure body buoyancy. Increased body fat will result in greater buoyancy, while greater muscle mass will result in a tendency to sink. This is known as hydrostatic weighing.
A technique for measuring body composition has been developed using the same principles as under water weighing. The technique uses air, as opposed to water, and is known as air displacement plethysmography (ADP). Subjects enter a sealed chamber that measures their body volume through the displacement of air in the chamber. Body volume is combined with body weight (mass) in order to determine body density. The technique then estimates the percentage of body fat and lean body mass (LBM) through known equations (for the density of fat and fat free mass).
Yeah? So?
*sigh* Ordinal post rule.
“A more accurate but less convenient method is using a large tank of water to measure body buoyancy. Increased body fat will result in greater buoyancy, while greater muscle mass will result in a tendency to sink. This is known as hydrostatic weighing.”
Technician 1: This man is 104% body fat! How is that possible?
Technician 2: Homer, are you eating ice cream in the tank again?
We have a winner!
niceeeee
i sink to the bottom whenever i do this…
but i’m 5′10 and weigh 140
All you skinny bastards can go jump into a vat of fat. And you youngsters who still have metabolisms that burn fat off – That goes double for you!
Meanwhile us fat folks will just sit here and wish we could get out of our chairs and kick your bony asses.
It’s discrimination, I tell yah!
A better caption: “Mmmmm, you look DELICIOUS.” He looks like he’s about to start licking his lips.
“There will be no bargain, young Jedi. I shall enjoy watching you die.”
What gives you the right to hate on those who either work to maintain their weight, or are naturally thin? Take control of your emotions and your own health. I will not pity you because you are fat, your weight is your own problem, don’t try to make it mine.
That’s it, I’m gonna sit on you now!!
and i’ll trip him as he runs by!
@dr. decrosis – get your head out of your anal sphinter – not all heavy people are over eaters – there are documented medical conditions that will cause weight gain – starting with taking steroids for certian genetic growth disorders, for unremitting pain, for lupus, asthma, severe allergies, and organ transplants. one of the terrific side effects of steroid use is the deteriation of the pancreas leading to permanent type 1 diabetes. another well documented side effect is weight gain that is not responsive to diet or excersize while on steroids. so put that in your pipe and blow it out your……
And let’s not forget that a lot of medications taken for depressioin inhibit weight loss as well. Some people are just asses and should learn a bit of tolerance.
A condition that’s affected a couple members of my family is called polycystic ovarian syndrome. If untreated, it makes weight loss damn near impossible, and weight gain pretty darn easy.
as well as having a f’d up thyroid or several of the auto-immune deficiency diseases.
@eddiepscetti, hating on fatties seems to be the last socially acceptable bigotry left and i’ll be glad when it’s not pc too. tolerance should b e for more than color, race, religion or orientation – what the heck is wrong with all those people claiming to be xian?
ack – pk ate part of my post!
trying again:
rant, rant, rant! at intolerant people who claim to be tolerant and etc, etc, etc.
So, what are we saying here? That all fat people are overweight because of pre-existing medical conditions. Because, ok, some are. For the most part, though, people are overweight because they eat too much and don’t take any exercise, which makes it their fault and it’s about time people were called on it.
The amount of vitriol reserved for “skinny” people on this site far outweighs (ironically) that reserved for fat people. Could this be because most people who use the internet are overweight? Discuss.
You do have a point. However, I think what’s being said here is don’t judge a person’s circumstances until you have all the facts. Saying people are overweight because they eat to much is like saying skinny people are anorexic. Sometimes it’s metabolic and it can’t be helped.
I’m 6′0 140 lbs. and you all can hate me as much as you want for being skinny.
I find it ironic that the same people who picked on me for being skinny in high school are now the same people who are now 100 lbs. overweight.
not hating on you, a little sadness for you, but that’s only because i like my men height/weight balanced or even a little on the muscle-y side.
I don’t hate you… Hell, come over to our place and we would probably feed ya dinner.
There is a reason I am no longer skinny and her name is Lynn…
Yeah, I’m single so I cook my own dinners.
And it isn’t that I don’t eat, I do! I love to eat, I just can’t bulk up. I am really not complaining, although its hard to find a girl that wants to date a skinny guy. She’s either got to be tiny, or not care if I’m thinner than her. I love the tiny chicks, but they tend to go after the muscle headed mouth breathers.
Wish you could have been there for the ham that Lynn made for Easter. or her Biscuit and Sausage casserole… or a number of other things…
Damn, now I am hungry.
Mmmmm, the biscuit and sausage casserole sounds awesome!
steve, you’re young yet, give yourself time. girls usually go through a period of shallow just like guys do. and in the mean time, maybe lower your standards a bit? be nice to the less than perfect girlfriend, and not nice in a smarmy way, but truely nice, the girlfriends will notice that you are kind and conciderate. they might still chase the muscle-chumps, but you could get some intro’s to girls who like a brain. just remember that vitriol towards others scores no points in the long run.
@Eds: Yes, it is. It is an Italian tasting dish, with sour cream and cheese and just… Taste like a bit of slightly spicey heaven.
She does a lot of great things in the kitchen, so you would probably like the boneless ribs she makes that are like little potroasts that you can cut with a fork. @_@
Damn, very hungry. If you have a mind for cooking, I plan to hop online tonight when I get home. Did you want my YIM handle? I can leave it on your profile page here if you want.
Sounds great!
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*goes to raid the fridge*
For most people being fat is a choice. They make that choice every day in their diet, lack of exercise, etc. Fatties deserve just as much disrespect as smokers. Until the day comes when smokers are allowed to light up in peace, fatties should be discriminated against as well.
I don’t recall fat people forcing you to eat when they are eating. I do know that when a person smokes around others, they have to deal with the smoking directly.
Bit of a difference there.
only if you can get fat from second hand eating since people die all the time from cancer caused by second hand smoke….. but until that happens, try learning a bit more about what causes weight gain .
let us know when you are perfect in all that you do so that you can look down on others who aren’t, in the mean time i’d recommend keeping some opinions to yourself so that you don’t sound like a total fool.
So should I discriminate against you because you’re ignorant? That’s a choice too you know..
And this from a medical student. I weep for the profession.
Sorry, was the irony and humour a little too subtle for you? I’ll add smileys next time, OK?
sarcasm detection fail
Well, there goes your lovefest with Anniee…
*makes popcorn and sells tickets*
i’ll out eat you…. and make you feel worse… at 34 i still have a metabolism that’ll kick anyones ass..
kinda sucks cause i’m always the bean pole mongst my friends
Do you have any idea how much I hate you right now?
I used to be a beanpole till ~25, but since then I’ve become 11 years older and 60 pounds heavier. And 10% less hair and 2 missing teeth. I am such a babe-magnet…
I guess we know what hes spending all that global warming money on.
Amen that. But don’t worry capitalism is still evil, even when you make a hundred million off the ‘green’ industry. What a crock.
I wonder if the gas he emits is contributing to glaobal warming?
I dunno, but all the aerosol cans of air freshener used to keep his tootin’ from stinkin’ can’t be good for the ozone layer.
Thank god he came up with that brilliant idea of carbon credits. Gee wasn’t that not at all aimed at making more money to feed the gore gut? And it was so effective…… only not really at all.
I heard last year that he got paid like 50,000 bucks to change the name from global warming to “climate change”.
Im sorry but 6th grade science trumps this guy’s claims. plants breathe co2 and the total amount of co2 in the air is about 3%. Thats man made and non man made. So taking into account the fact that animals and volcanoes expel a lot more carbon humans and all their technology are probably only responsible for 1% of that 3%. So if all 6.5billion people and all of their cars and power plants are responsible for 1% of the atmosphere do you really think driving a half gasoline half electric vehicle is going to stop global warming? Do you really think that using a fluorescent lightbulb is going to prevent the world from ending? Yeah me neither. Even if all 6.5billion of us drove hybrids or walked to work and lived in mud huts with no electricity except what we could get from solar or wind or hydro power it would still only cut the co2 in the air by 33% down to 2% of the atmosphere and that means the plants would have that much less to breathe and that means we would have that much less oxygen to breathe.
So if you want to help the planet go plant a tree or 10.
Oh and Algore’s house just last year put in some solar panels … before that it was all running off of grid power and 50% of the nation’s power is from coal. He might have nuclear power where he lives but in either case hes not getting much “green” power himself. Then he flies around the country instead of driving because jets dont spew thousands of tons of carbon into the air noooo. LOL
Global warming is a joke. If it is happening we are foolish to think we can stop it or that we are causing it.
There is a large part of the scientific community that disputes Gore’s facts concerning Global Warming/Climate change, and have indictated that it’s all cyclic. We are on the downside of the cycle, which they say makes it appear that the climate change is man made. Who to believe though? Having said that, it still doesn’t hurt to do what we can for the environment.
The sad thing is that for all his facts, Shinobi forgot the part where we are killing off forests left and right.
Sure, plants breathe CO2 but we are killing them off. Soooo, if that continues, what will be doing all that helpful breathing for us?
This is where math punches them in the face but I digress. There is a lot of proof in either direction about climate change, however, there is the absolute fact that we are removing tons upon tons of rainforest. So the statement about plants breathing in CO2 just makes the basic point that we are making an impact by the amount of deforestation.
Bear in mind that I am not some hippie ready to sabotage logging companies or chain myself to the foliage but I do find it foolish to say we aren’t having an effect.
At last count, the Carbon Dioxide percent of the atmosphere had increased 35% since industrialization started. I remember memorizing that it was 3% of the total atmospheric gases…but now it is 4% of the total.
They talk about our impact like we are fleas on a dog. However, I have seen parasite and fleas nearly pick a dog clean.
No one rain drop thinks it caused the flood and never is that axiom remembered by those speaking out in defense of the problem.
Timber companies are capitalistic in nature, and for them to be able to make a profit and remain in business, cutting down their source of income without replacing it is pretty stupid. Most timber companies will tell you that on average, they plant two trees for every tree they cut down. Not to mention the cleaning out of fire hazards under older forests and the other beneficial things that they do. So don’t believe what you’re told by “green people” about timber companies, they do their best to replace what they take.
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You’d also be surprised how fast pine trees grow to replace what has been cut down. Most stands can be harvested 10-15 years after planting, if I’m remembering my numbers correctly. In terms of getting those CO2-eating plants back into commission, that’s pretty quick.
Not talking about North American timber companies, love. I know they’re shit is solid up here. I am also not assuming that America is the only one cutting down trees.
Poaching is capitalistic in nature but despite animals being endangered, there are still fools hunting them to extinction… Capitalism doesn’t mean foresight nor am I grabbing my information from hippie green people. I have yet to meet a Martian, thank you.
I apologize for the assumptions. I’m in a pissy mood today because of the last two days of LAST week.
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I’d have to say that the evidence of our destroying the forests are greatly overrated, even in other countries, however. Many of the numbers from the 80’s and 90’s about cutting down a football field every hour were GREATLY exaggerated in order to cause panic, but unfortunately a lot of people still hang on to that false notion of deforestation of the planet.
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I wish I had numbers in front of me so you wouldn’t think I’m talking out my ass, but deforestation isn’t the problem. Creating a panic where none should be is the problem. We need to take care of our planet while at the same time being smart about what we can and can’t do as humans, since we are so finite and small in the grand scheme of the planet.
True, the planet will get by just fine without us no matter what we do. However, the planet is a rock with a magma core. I am thinking about the life on the planet which is very much so connected to our actions.
Granted, I already admitted that we aren’t as horrid as the panic would state. I am simply saying that our actions do have repercussions that many don’t want to admit.
Even as I die-hard Conservative I can admit that we need to do our best to take care of what we have. I recycle, I try to save as much gas as I can by carpooling, and the like, but to try to scare me by saying (fifteen years ago, thank you Ted Danson) that the planet will be gone in ten years if we don’t do something NOW NOW NOW is just silly and dangerous. Now they’re wanting to tax carbon emissions with cap and trade, which has a lot of repercussions that people don’t want to admit, phase out internal combustion engines in America, and a lot of other whacko statements that the whacko groups like to scream that will eventually start be ok since when we’ve all heard them for years and years they will start to sound normal. We’re on a very dangerous, slippy slope here, and it leads to nothing good.
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I apologize for the ramble and the rant. Like I said, bad mood today.
You’re forgiven. There is a reason you are in my cabinet.
are you sure you’re not a sensible, middle of the road moderate with leftist leanings there Froofrou?
but seriously, the extreme left is way out in left feild, and the extreme right is lost in the club house somewhere. wish we could put all the extreme fringes on an island somewhere and let them play survivor for a couple seasons
I am a die-hard Conservative with some Neo-Con tendencies mixed uncomfortably in with my social moderate Liberal leanings, LOL. I’m a little hard to categorize.
it’s ok – i’m a die hard liberal with libertarian leanings, believe good gun control means hitting what you aim at, and wish the death penalty was carried out more
i also think welfare should be tied to work even if it is ‘make work’. stuff still needs done and most young people need experience on job applications anyway. i like roe v wade, but don’t expect everyone to, just don’t remove the right from women who do. i believe in gay marriage (let the gay’s support the divorce lawyers for a while, i’ve done my share) i also believe in a strong, fully equipped military and combat roles for women (wanted to join the army, but they wouldn’t let me be a sniper! their loss, lol)
so yeah, i’m kind of hard to label too. guess you could say i’m a bleeding heart, gun toting, social improving, leave me the fck alone, citified country gal!
I agree with pretty much everything you said, except for the women on the front lines thing. I think women wanting to be treated as equals to men is bringing them down a notch, and while I can fight just as well as a man (given the right circumstances and a big enough gun), I prefer the security of knowing that I’ve got a big strong man out there protecting my life for me
\
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Also, I love what you said about gun control, LOL. Also, I drive an SUV……with two kids and two stepkids, we didn’t have a choice, even if I wanted to be stuck in a tiny little “smart” car that gets 2 hours to the charge
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So I think you and I are in the same, hard to categorize boat, and we have cookies!
mmmm, cookies. homemade? warm from the oven?
)
that will make a nice desert for the baked potato soup i’ve got heating on the stove
and i don’t begrudge you the suv as long as you take it out in the dirt and mud once in a while. suv’s are one of my pet peeves. so many people have them here because they might need the 4×4 one day. yeah, it snows a couple inches most years and about once a decade we get 4-5 inches….don’t need suv’s if you never leave the big city, especially hummers and the like. however, if you live above the snow line, or in a rural area, or the like, suv’s have their place. myself, i’m looking at my next vehicle being either an extended cab pu or another toyota 4-runner. both are spendy even used, and cost more to insure, but my toys get to play in the dirt and mud and the snow even
i’ve had the full size van thing, and while it was nice for what it was, i was never a soccer mom type person and it wasn’t useful for me at all except as a taxi service. i would have rather have had a crew cab even then – kids and dogs in the cab, stuff in the back whether it was camping gear or manure for the lawn. but i also abject to fabric seats and plus carpeting in trucks too. (too hard to clean
LOL, I agree totally!! If you’re going to have the big honking vehicle, you might as well use it right!
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I’d love to have my truck back, but you just can’t get the people room in a truck that you can in an SUV or a van. And I REFUSE to drive a van. I am not 50 with 16 grandkids, thank you very much! Not yet, anyway. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to settle for the van, and thankfully hubby and I found exactly what we needed in the form of a Ford Explorer with the third row seat. I haven’t broken it’s dirt cherry yet, but I plan to soon. We’ve only had it a couple of weeks, and haven’t really had a free weekend to do with it what we plan.
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I’m a little torn about the interior of a truck. On the one hand, I dont’ like sticking to the seats in the summertime, but then, that might be different if I lived up north. On the other hand, if you can’t open the doors and hose it out when it’s dirty, what good is having a truck? Also, what good is having a truck if you can’t haul a giant-ass boat or horse trailer behind it? If you’re going to have one, do it right, dammit!
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And yes, the cookies are fresh from the oven, your choice of chocolate chip or oatmeal raisin. And I have rum to go with them!
rum too! (wipes slobber off chin) my second most favorite drink
i remember sticking to vinyl seats in the summer, so we got cheap terry towels and sewed them together to make big covers then when i got my first little car, it was bf’s t’s pulled over the seat backs and towels for the seat part. what’s great is when you’re at the beach, you always have a towel handy, and they’re washable to boot.
hosing out the inside of vehicles is always the best way to go – gets rid of inches of crud all at once and if you can run it up on a ramp so it all drains out the back or tilt to one side, even better.
“plants breathe co2 and the total amount of co2 in the air is about 3%. ”
The thing about plants exhaling CO2 is that they don’t change the net level of carbon in the atmosphere.
I’m not going to debunk your entire post, on second thought. You obviously have made up your mind to ignore the fact that CO2 has certain well defined chemical properties, and those properties apply in the real world as well as in the labs. You won’t believe that raising the net amount of CO2 to the same levels as in the dinosaur’s times will result in the same temperatures they endured. Truthfully, we’ve already passed the tipping point, and global climate change really is something we can do very little about. I hope you and yours aren’t among the billions who will have their lives severely impacted by rising sea levels, severe droughts, severe storms, and massive population shifts. Good luck with your head in the sand life.
Also ‘greening’ a house makes it consume more energy.
Carbon footprint? I’m more worried about his sizeable carbon @$$print
I like Al. I wish I had voted for him instead of moron boy in 2000. I *still* feel guilty about voting for Bush in 2000. *sobs*
well if you had voted for gore unless you live in florida (and specifically broward county) it wouldnt have made much of a difference. And wed be up to our eyelids in green initiatives to save the planet from something that we arent causing in the first place. Dont get me wrong bush made quite a few mistakes too but id rather put up with “oops there were no wmd’s” than “oops i guess taxing people’s gasoline to 9 dollars a gallon wasnt such a hot idea afterall”.
You mean “oops we started a war and got a load of folk killed” isn’t as bad as “oops we wasted money”? Sake…
Jon Stewart simplification win.
…on both sides, in fact.
Simplified, yes. True, also yes.
But I already divined that you were simple. No surprise there.
Is that the comedian guy?
One of them. The other one is Steven Colbert, who pretends to be a neo-conservative.
Go find yourself a good therapist and get over it.
@bix nood:
i’ve been trying to wrap my noggin around this since you posted it. can you explain how things like passive solar heat, using gray water for landscape needs, and planting local foliage/trees for cooling among other things makes a home consume more energy? and do you have real cites to back up what you say. not going to attack, just want to understand this concept.
I think he may be referring to retro-fitting a house to be “greener” uses so much energy if not done perfectly that it’s almost worth it to build another. Also, it’s expensive, and is hard to justify in older houses.
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And then you’ve got Green Gore over there preaching about the evils of carbon emissions while flying his jet across the country over and back and needing more energy to power his house than some small countries need. The whole movement being fronted by him is a joke. They need a new spokesperson.
I agree. Can we put him in a lock-box?
If we toss Hillary in there too, would we get a Village on the Green?
“It Takes a Village to Put This Inconvenient Green Man in a Lockbox”?
I was using gray water to irrigate my back yard for a while. Then I fixed the washing machine’s drainpipe.
I guess maybe I should’ve just figured out how to channel it better.
Dear God but Al looks creepy in this picture. He looks like he’s going to bit that lady’s face off!
bite rather. He’s going to bite her face off.
I think that bit was correct and that the ‘going to’ was extraneous.
No way, that creepy face is totally anticipatory, not smugly satisfied. That lady’s death by Zombie Gore is imminent.
OMG! So funneh! It’s funneh cuz hez fat and he made a movie called inconvenient truth!!!11 Lol!!!
Take not, pundit kitcheners. Obvious references do not a joke make.
*note, not “not.” Otherwise that last line is incredibly yoda-esque.
Bring me Solo and the Wookiee. They will suffer for this outrage.
holy crap im watchin that movie right now and they just said that. wow i think your brilliant!
Rumor has it that next year they’re going to ‘float’ him in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade..
He’s certainly got enough hot air to stay aloft the whole time…
The Nobel Prize Float? Mmmm, say it with me, “Al Gore, Nobel Peace Prize laureate.” Has a certain ring to it, doesn’t it? Maybe it should be “Nobel Peace Prize laureate Al Gore.” That sounds nice too, don’t you think? Of course, we can always go with the less formal “Nobel Prize Winner, Al Gore.”
The first person to mention “Nobel Peace Prize laureate Henry Kissinger” gets a free kick in the nuts.
I’ll pass on the free kick, thanks. I won’t disregard Al’s achievment, but I still don’t like him.
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Oh, NPP laureate Hank Kissinger..
*hands Ed a can of peanuts for kick deflection.
I hope it’s a big can! I know Seth has a pretty mean kick..
I knew you’d get a kick out of that.
As long as it wasn’t a knee-jerk reaction..
“A Convenient SuperSizing,” starring Al Gore, directed by Morgan Spurlock.
Written by Michael Moore
If Big Macs cause chubby, then why am I paying for Extenze and Enzyte?
Good question. Why ARE you paying for Extenze and Enzyte?
I’ll show you sometime. After a drink or seven.
uhm. . . well. . . damn.
Um. Or not. Thanks anyway.
Run away! Run far away!
Inconvenient Truth: If you want to become president and save the world, you have to win your home state.
An inconvenient truth–fast food’s not the only cause of chubby. This would be funnier if the pic actually indicated a link between him and fast food.
The link was there, but it was a sausage link, so he ate it.
He looks kinda like a Special Olympian in this picture.
he has gained a ton of weight, not that he was every really that trim.
poor guy, all that money made him ugly on the outside (a little on the inside too!)
For those that give a damn, I made a cruder version of this lol. Link to my stuff in my name as always.
I’ll think a certain Apple board member had one too many 17 inchers..
Ouch, sounds like it hurt.
you know…the people who type “First” probably get more enjoyment out of seeing people freaking out and saying stuff like “You are a waste of bandwidth, stop trolling our threads!!” for about twelve comments than they do out of being first.
just ignore them…it’s a short, harmless word.
No, wait, think of the educational value by learning trivia! It’s now acceptable to say it since we all got past bagging on the person, but instead share our wealth of the mundane.
thats gross, I don’t want to know about the former vice president’s chubby
I guess that’s one way to take care of those terrible farting cows.