Dear Penthouse Forum
Dear Penthouse Forum you’re never going to believe this but…
(Josef Stalin)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: Judge_Mental
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Where did the funny go?
It might be hiding in his moustache? I don’t know. :/
Zzzzzzz
Is it just me or does this really make no sense?
Oh god i was cracking up on this one.
You were on crack?
Why, why? Please explain! (…cause I don’t really get the “fun” here. :/ )
It’s the humorous juxtaposition of unexpected elements. Assuming some familiarity with Stalin (historically), the notion of Stalin sitting down to pen a sexually explicit missive to Penthouse Forum about some exploit with the two hot kitchen workers in the stables (or whatever) is amusing, because it’s unexpected. (From what I recall, about three or four out of five letters of that type start out with “I thought these letters were made up, but…”, “I never thought something like this would happen in real life…” or something similar).
So this is only funny to Penthouse readers. I was always a Mayfair reader, personally
.
Oh, I don’t know….it’s not anything I’ve seen on a regular basis, but it’s something of a cliche, you know? (Or, well, I guess not as much as I thought!)
I think the word you’re going for is “meme.”
I think you’re correct, thanks.
I’ve always wondered… How does one pronounce “meme?”
Mee-mee?
Mem?
Meh-meh?
Meem?
Or is it French like “mwom?”
“Meem”.
“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem”
This one got a laugh out of me, though that may have something to do with that almighty mustache. Picking a picture of someone with hilarious facial hair is ALWAYS a good start.
Seriously, what is it with facial hair and extreme evil? Some kind of mind-controlling migrating parasite, attached to the face, that drives humans to acts of depravity?
I think you may be onto something…{link}…maybe its an intergalactic parasite…
He’s got that mustache feelin.
Thanks for taking the time to explain. Then I guess it’s just not appealing to my sense (or lack of such) humour.
Oh, I thought it had to do with the US becoming more socialist or something.
This is much funnier
Why, why? Please explain! (…cause I don’t really get
the “fun” here. :/ )
Penthouse = Magazine with naked ladies in it.
“Forum” = a section in the magazine wherein readers’ letters describe strange situations in which they had sex.
“You’re never going to believe this, but…” = One way in which the letters
typically begin.
Another typical letter beginner, “I never thought anything like this would ever happen to me,” is covered in the [LINK] under my name.
The Onion FTW!!!!
Yay!! *does the Onion Dance with MG*
Do we have to take off our shirts for this dance?
Yes, yes you do.
*Takes off shirt, begins to dance*
*Watches co-worker make phone call*
*Is wrestled to the ground by men in white coats and is given injection*
“Good night…be good to your wait staff…try the veal!!”
*watches as MG is led away*
Oops! Maybe I should have told her the part about
wearing several layers of clothes…
*drooling*
Vacation? Oh Goody!! Shady Acres? Shuffleboard? Sounds wonderful…
But I wanted to go to Demented Hills. It looks like more fun.
*watches through medicinal haze as whitecoats inject Diss*
*smiles through haze*
MG, have small space aliens ever landed in your brain and told you to break into the zoo and free the kangaroos?
*giggles*
Do you mean the little aliens wearing the Groucho Marx glasses with the nose and mustache?
No, those are the aliens that tell you to
swim in the big fountain downtown…
Diss is talking about the aliens who look
like big chimichangas.
Diss, they’re right behind you…and boy are they funny looking!!
*involuntary muscle twitch*
Finland!!!!!!!!!
*bribes staff to use itching powder on MG*
*mutters under breath* Call me substandard will you…
*begins itching*
IT’S THOSE BUGS!!! IT’S GOTTA BE THE BUGS, I TELL YA!! {Link}
“So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on them. ‘Give me five bees for a quarter,’ you’d say. Now where were we? Oh yeah, the important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn’t have any white onions, because of the war; the only thing you can get was those big yellow ones.” – Grandpa Simpson
“There sure are a lot of leaves in your driveway. The President is a Demmycraaaat.”
Ah yeah, I just don’t get why Stalin writing that should make me laugh. Just not my kind of humour, I guess! Thanks for extra explanation, anyway.
So, who wants a mustache ride?
Just you, apparently.
…I met this broad from Alaska. Goes by the name Sarah.
And you’ll never believe what she did with my smoking pipe…
*double entendre intended*
Dear Penthouse Forum you’re never going to believe this but… I accidentally 20 million people.
***CONTEST!!!***
Guess Bix Nood’s verb!
licked?
Performed a body cavity check?
Well, as it’s under a picture of Stalin, I’m going with “executed”.
shaved
Bix nooded?
WINNER!! (That sounds disgusting–PERFECT for the next edition!)
entertained with my compelling and dashing slight of hand tricks?
Hey, Jane’s back! Good trip?
Yes and no. We went into New York City (which I’d never been to before) and saw a lot of stuff but I was dead tired because my brothers powerwalked the whole way. Love my niece and nephew but I’m thinking that much quality time with my siblings is probably not the greatest idea.
Take a taser next time. That will teach them the value of the
leisurely stroll. (They’ll thank you later.)
Dear Leon,
I hope you enjoy my little surprise, it should be arriving just… about…
total lack of funny. anyone else feeling parched??
Actually got a chuckle out of me…
Oh, boy. The lefties are going to flip out. “That’s not funny!” and “see you righties! there are plenty of lols for you!” Just because someone finally made a lol parodying one of the role-models of the left.
Stalin, a role-model of the left? Interesting idea.
Danbala, we were at a “Super-secret” left-wing conference this week…we were all issued our “Big Book of Poppa-Joe’s Lefty Propaganda” along with portraits of him to hang in our living rooms…just don’t tell anyone…
I won a door prize!
*shows off Poppa-Joe koozie*
Hmmm…all I got was a pass to the front of the next breadline…
I thought you won the fake tattoo…
*catches onto Rho’s game*
Nope…you’re not gonna get me to take off my shirt to see my tattoo…I vaguely remember how our little “onion dance” ended!!
Oh, pish tosh! That was HOURS ago…
I won a Stalin bobble-head!
But did your’s come with a smoking pipe? It was a limited series, I have number 3.
Damn you eddie!
Mine is limited edition too. Stalin on the throne, number 2.
See what I did there?
Yeah, but the one you have is Uncle Joe just before he carked it. Mine is from when he was in his prime.. it’s worth a bit more y’know – back when he was known as the “Man of Steel” and not the “Lord of Porcelin”.
Well, mine is a sort of diorama, and includes the Iron Shower Curtain.
I see what you did there.. you’ll pay, Boris, you’ll pay!
Does it show Stalin *in* the *Stall*? XD
Whuh!? All I got was an old, rather faded copy of Mao’s wisdoms (I call it The Little Pink Book) and a small blurred photo of old Trotty. Damn.
*Humming a Beatles classic*
But if you go carrying pictures of chairman Mao
You ain’t going to make it with anyone anyhow…
There’s not even a picture of him in it. Someone ripped out the portrait page. :/
Bummer…bet they’re not making it with anyone, anyhow!!! Serves ‘em right for defacing State Property like that!!
Da!
I still have my Frankie Goes to Hollywood Lenin ‘Muscle sleeve’ Tee shirt…
Lenin say Relax????
Do you still have your braided rat tail that you cut off in ‘89?
I got a bumper stickers saying “Don’t Let McCarthy Get You Down”. I believe there were also flowers to put in my hair in the even that I go to San Francisco.
LOLwut? I may be a moderate but I don’t see any lefties getting offended by this. Then again, I actually speak to them instead of considering them evil baby eating monsters.
As a lefty…I got a chuckle (albeit an itty-bitty one)…partly because I HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR…sorry to disappoint you Allen…
Yeah … That thought struck me after posting my comment. If someone seriously thinks that “the left” thinks well of Stalin, it’s no wonder if they think left is evil. :p
It’s simply a thinly veiled jab that implies that the left are all pinko commies. As such, we would of course defend Stalin.
The lefties aren’t flipping out, so zip your pants and wash your hands.
Ah, but that’s where you’re wrong, AllenHyundai. We lefties love this lol because it promotes pornography, thereby endangering Real America’s Small Town Family Values and threatening Freedom. Yay porn!
Best. Comment. Ever.
(Where ever ≈ today)
certainly agree…
Hahaha suicide_blond, that was full of win!
Well glad you enjoyed it y’all!
Yay Porn!
Seconded.
In bed or other flat surface?
…with a big….
screen tv.
I knew I liked you.
*still scratching and whimpering*
Ummmm, DWN…I’m sorry I called you inadequate…I promise it’ll naver happen again…
*turns hose on MG*
Close your eyes, now — this’ll help. Promise. And stop trying to run away!
Cold!!! Cold!!!! ARRRRRRAAAAGHGGHHH!!!!
*begins running in circles*
*throws MG big fluffy towel*
Sorry. But at least you’ve stopped itching now, right?
y-y-y-y-y-y-y-yes….b-b-b-b-b-but…w-w-w-w-w-w-will d-d-d-d-d-d-d-dwn ever f-f-f-f-f-forg-g-g-give m-m-m-me?
*gives MG a blanket to get warm with and a hug to help her get warm*
*snuggles*
Aaaahhhhhh!
*cue Fifth Element AutoWash joke. snuggles MG some more*
Boo Family Values!
Family Values like using your daughters as currency or just hating anybody different?
Who was it that said “family is code for censorship?”
Probably somebody not getting enough head and thus wanted to make sure that Blood and Violence was okay as long as nobody had an orgasm on television?
Is anyone getting enough head? I mean really.
*opens mouth to say something, pauses, and then closes mouth*
*thinks real hard* Um, Hef maybe?
Does it count if you have to pay for it?
Meals, gifts, wedding rings, it’s never free. As usual, The Onion has an interesting take on this. [LINK]
Seth, that’s surprisingly cynical of you!
Yeah, but women have to buy all that stuff too. Damn women’s lib!
Do you ever get it for free? I don’t. There isn’t a random oral sex fairy running around. Anything I get is from the woman I have been with for 9 years and all that entails, expense-wise.
*checks herself over in the mirror* Well then what the hell am I wearing these wings and tutu for?!
Not a clue, never even a teasing lick from ya so don’t get me to lying…
Actually yes. I’m dating the Random Oral Sex Fairy.
I heard the Random Oral Sex Fairy hangs out in the men’s restroom at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport. At least that’s what Larry Craig told me.
He does. That’s why it pays to make an appointment, he’s an incredibly busy guy, especially during election season.
I am suddenly happy to pay for my oral loving… I need to give Lynn some extra appreciation tonight and an extra bowl of ice cream.
…I misread that as “erection season” the first time. *blink*
enough, yes, too much… NEVER… (have to work SOME TIME)
A sailor being punished?
~
lol
“Is anyone getting enough head? I mean really.”
`
It would go a long way towards explaining the trend for wearing baseball caps backwards.
“Who was it that said “family is code for censorship?””
`
I think “family” is Republican for “father”.
Ooooooh, good burn. Good burn. Damn…
What the right can throw in under the “Family Values” heading is neither “of family” nor “of values.” Same story with “Moral Majority,” which was neither.
[LINK] #6 is what I’m talking about, though you may experience technical difficulties with the article.
Thanks to Kelto, who posted this link a while back.
Damn, there goes all the fun out of commercials. Oh wait, nvm, there wasn’t any to begin with. Sad thing is that despite that information, it wouldn’t stop it from working.
(If my eaten post doesn’t show up in a bit, I’ll rewrite it.)
*uses Beavis and Butthead giggle*
“hmmmhmmm..eaten post…hmmmmhmmmm…getting head….”
Role-models of the left?
Kid, you need to adjust your tin-foil hat. You’re getting some leakage around the nostrils.
Also, he may need a bib, because the sensless crap inside his skull is leaking out of his mouth where other people can see it….
Um, what? Role model of who, now? If anything, it is the Neo-cons who secretly idolize Stalin.
From his re-Marx, I don’t think he will be Lenin anything from you anytime soon.
I lolled. j 3j
I see they left the door to the paranoid wing open again…
“The lunatics are in my hall…”
This one happens to be on the grass. I’m about to tell him to Get Off My Lawn.
12 gauge…
The paper holds their folded faces to the floor, and every day the paper boy brings more!
Uh.
Leftists don’t like Stalin either. :\
In Soviet Russia, girl f*cks you!
Uhhh…that happens here too.
apparently not to dev.
consolation lubricant?
Almost a perfect ad for the film “Human Remains”.
jayrosenblattfilms(dot)com/human(dot)html
wtf is that mean?
I’m the only one in this world. Can please someone join me in this life? Or maybe death…
Hello forum members!
super forum
Found this forum in MSN, writing “double windsor “))) Why?)))
Let us meet!
I Jane!
hello
im new on this forum….
This looks cool so far, what’s up people?
If it’s not just all bots here, let me know. I’m looking to network
Oh, and yes I’m a real person LOL.
Peace,
Hey friends just posting to say that I enjoy the forums and hope everyone keeps up the good work so I have something to look at every day.
Also if your looking for a teeth whitening tray check out the personal battle I had with getting my teeth white.
lol, i laugh everytime i see a piktchur of josé stalin
I’m charro and I approve this timely message.
i like his pipe tho ^^