Jesus raises the dead…
Jesus raises the dead… Not what everyone expected.
(Jesus and Zombies!)
What is happening in the picture? Tell us in the Comments
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: RC
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KILL THEM WITH FIYA!
No! Only thing worse then a bunch of zombies is a bunch of zombies on fire.
That comment made my day. :]
Ever play Postal 2?
i have no idea whats going on here.. but the combination of this lol and this comment made me shoot beer out of my nose…
which ive never done before…
and i hope to never do again..
Welcome to PK!
What a waste of beer.
It’s just a little snotty, it’s still good, it’s still good.
This is the Zombie walk in Richmond, Virginia.
It was to raise cancer awareness.
Is this an annual event or a one-time thing?
If it isn’t an annual event, we should make it one!
Were you drinking a beer at the time? If not, that’s the best kind of magic.
But then how will you get the 101 CREMATIONS achievement? It’s worth 20 points!
How do you not expect that? Zombie movies for decades have been telling us this is what happens when the dead are raised. Sheesh.
maybe jesus is a zombie too…. making god a zombie! zomfg
THIS IS NOT JESUS. JESUS ONLY WEARS FLIP-FLOPS OR SANDALS. DON’T BE FOOLED.
I’m pretty sure that is Jesus.
He knows that if he wears sandals, he will get all sorts of blood and guts, and other assorted bits of rotting zombie flesh all over his feet.
Anybody scholarly can tell you that Jesus likes clean feet.
True. There are passages in the bible about Mary Magdalene washing Jesus’ feet.
Cleanliness IS next to Godliness or so they say.
“Sweet Zombie Jesus!”
I love a flaming Tank
What zombie pub crawl did this come from?
Happy Zombie Jesus Day! C&H WIN!
I was at this one; wicked
.
It’s the Zombie walk! Some random thing people decided to start doing, and since Jesus was brought back from the dead, I say he belongs there.
HAH! Love it!
This particular zombie walk (more of a “shuffle,” actually) took place in Richmond, VA. You can see more of Jesus and his necrotic friends by doing a Youtube search for “Carytown zombies.”
For some reason I feel like this is from my city. That catholic school girl in the background….that skirt…it looks so familiar.
*whispers in her ear* You know you must go back there…..you must….you are drawn to find Jesus…………..
I had to do that.
That not a Catholic school girl, that’s Sean Connery
Lol! Win. =D
total win! lol
What are you pouting about? Are you upset due to your crush on Sean Connery or your crush on Catholic school girls with hairy legs?
No no… Did you see the front page of RoflRazzi? It’s Sean Connery in a skirt.[sic]
You mean this one? [link]
I’ll admit, he has let himself go, but what do you expect, he is a Scot.
Pfft! Scots don’t look like -
…
*looks out window*
*changes subject*
One of my all time favorite performers. [link]
Suck it, Trebek!
Alex Trebek? He’s a Canuck.
Erm, can I take this to mean you have not seen the SNL Celebratory Jeopardy skits?
I haven’t watched the show since, ‘79 or so. I really have tried to watch a few, but they just can’t compare to the original cast and writers.
Call me a purist or a snob or whatever, but the few times I have trried to watch, well, it’s just, well, awful.
.
So sorry, I guess I ruined your joke/pun, but no, I didn’t get it.
Well said!
Oh, it’s a link! hahaha
I suffered from commentus interruptus.
Is this what you meant?
[link]
I’ll take anal bum covers for 200, Alex.
I’ll have “The Rapists” for 200, Alex.
That’s “Therapists!”
That’s not what your mom said last night Alex!
Moo.
Please tell me you’re talking about Jacksonville with the skirt, because I could have sworn I had three of those skirts in my closet for four years…
… or maybe someone else stole it, I have no idea.
what does this say about the followers of jesus?
nothing
What are you implying it means??
We like guys in dresses.
That’s a robe and sash. Silly person.
Though yes, I agree. Bishi guys in dresses = win.
Ha, yeah, I know. Pretty much I just like it for the lulz.
Yay for using the word Bishi in a sentence!!! Plus using Bishie in a transvestite situation
Double Win!
Sweet Zombie Jesus!
Nah, this is just the little known scene from the Dawn of the Dead…you know, the one where it explains where all the zombies came from? Blasted undead followers. >.>
Hilarious! It reminds me of Shaun of the Dead. I’d love to participate in a zombie pub crawl/undead-shuffle!
Is it weird that I find that zombie chick a little bit hot?
I don’t know…are you a necrophiliac?
Necrophiliacs like dead bodies.
Obviously a Zombie, like your classic vampires, liches, and skeletons, count as undead.
Agreed. An undead chick is not the same as dead bodies…
Right. It’s not necrophilia if they can ask for more!
*Channeling Sam Kinison*
“Sex with a Zombie isn’t that weird…I’ve done it…I’VE BEEN MARRIED FOR TWO FUKCING YEARS!! aaaaaaaggggggggghhhh!!”
Sam Kinison was da bomb.
and my reaction to the lol = LOL!
You’ve got red on you.
He’s not my dad! He’s my step-dad!
*or*
The man’s idea of a romantic setting and impenetrable fortress are the same thing!
I love that movie. Hot Fuzz is made of win as well.
“Take car. Go to Mum’s. Kill Phil – “Sorry.” – grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. How’s that for a slice of fried gold?”
My absolute favorite movie involving zombies of all time.
Yeah Boi!
My personal favorite part is when the female zombie (in the garden there’s a girl) falls on the pole and gets right back up and Ed slowly cranks the disposable camera again. Priceless.
I love the recurring bit with his ex-roommate from “Spaced”- her band of friends and relatives survives, and his… well…
Oooh, I think I might watch this again tonight! It’s been a while.
I know! But seriously, if you haven’t seen Hot Fuzz you must remedy that! There’s a great bit about jumping over fences in that one too and it’s Simon Pegg and Nick Frost back together again.
I love Hot Fuzz. I love when he kicks that old lady in the face. Good times…
Oh, I’ve seen it, I just don’t own that one. Yet.
Oh yeah, Hot Fuzz is the best Pegg/Frost movie so far. Didn’t like Run Fat Boy, Run quite as much. I love the way Hot Fuzz mocks all the cop movie cliches, and then re-enacts them all in about ten frenzied minutes at the end.
Hot Fuzz is awesome, but I love zombie movies. I think Hot Fuzz was a better movie, but Shaun of the Dead is pure win because it’s a zombie flick.
Looks like “Jesus” is giving someone the “How YOU doin’?”…
It was a little Buddy Christ to me.
Doesn’t the name just pop? *buddy Christ*
RIP George Carlin.
Any way we could get him to come back?
I wish…
*wipes tear away*
Are you insane?!?!
He’d be a ZOMBIE!
Cardinal Zombie
We’d have to hit him with his golf clubs.
P.s.: Dogma looks awesome on bluray.
He’d be Teh Funniest Zombie!
He’d probably be able to catch me pretty quickly because I can’t laugh and run at the same time…
Not the official term of course, just something we’ve been kicking around the office.
I’m pretty sure this was the zombie walk in Richmond, VA. Not quite sure though, my friend was at that one, and she said there was a Jesus, and he was awkward and completely out of place, ahha.
Well…technically, if a zombie is one that is undead…Jesus was a zombie after that whole “on the third day” thing. I think he was in the right place =P
I think what a zombie is goes deeper than simply being something that is raised from the dead.
Right, I agree, hence the “if a zombie is” part. I wonder what the exact definition is though….
I think being raised from the dead is sufficient for zombiehood.
nah,if that were true it’d be hard to be in a party after using some phoenix down.
Ya, the D&D geek always rebels when I see somebody mention Zombie Jesus. No respect for those who have been raised instead of merely animated.
/geek snobbery.
if all undead are zombies, then are vampires zombies? I don’t think so…
Exactly!! What about Liches? Skeletons! Ghouls?! sheesh people….
And don’t get me started on all those adventurers that have utilized the Clerical spells to revive and even resurrect them after they are past 0 HPs.
*Face-palm*
Already had my geek pfft somewhere on this thread. My understand of zombies was an animated and fleshy body bereft of intelligence following the will of either dark and hungry instinct or its animator.
Vampires are not zombies- zombies are raised from the dead and vampires are created from the living. Both are undead, but each made undead in different ways.
Hmmm…
My daughter was at Katsucon in Arlington VA over Valentine’s weekend and brought home pictures of “Jesus” who looks suspiciously like this guy. Her picture was at a distance and Jesus was facing away, so I can’t be sure.
Maybe this is this guy’s way of evangelizing? Must make sense to him but if it IS his faith statement, then he really needs to grow out his own hair. That wig is ridiculous.
I didn’t get the evangelism thing when I saw it. I figured he’s atheist & just thought it would be amusing to dress as Jesus. Who knows for sure though.
Jesus looks pretty happy at being returned from the dead.
Zombie Jesus will kill your family!
This is tasteless, blasphemous, and not funny at all. I know it’s supposed to be a lighthearted joke, but I, personally didn’t find it funny
*Ignoring the “Don’t feed the troll” signs*
Just as blasphemous as your overuse of the comma. Just out of curiosity, was it the picture or the caption at which you took such offense ?
I was just stating my opinion.
…and don’t make fun of my commas. My finger has epilepsy. ,,, ,,, ,,,,, ,,,, ,,,, ,,,, ,, , ,, ,,,,,,
To answer your question, I was offended by the guy dressing up as Jesus during a zombie walk. Jesus wasn’t a zombie. Jesus is God. Again, It’s just my personal belief. (Besides, zombies can’t fly)
zombi: a dead body that has been brought back to life by a supernatural force
You were saying?
You also need to explain Lazarus. I bet he was pretty ripe after a few days. The point is, you can sit there with righteous indignation, or realize that Jesus probably has/had (depending on one’s point of view) one righteous sense of humor. What YOU need to do is embrace the absurdity of the picture and not get your religous self bent out of shape.
*nesting fail*? That was meant for Lark88..
Man, a guy can’t voice…erm…type an opinion without getting ripped on. Wait. Sorry. I forgot this is the internet. Silly me. Oh, you’re right regarding Lazarus, I remember the bible did literally say, “he stinketh” That part amused me.
Yeah that was pretty funny.
There are no specific regulations requiring commercial airline passengers to possess a pulse, however, most of the undead find it difficult to navigate the TSA checkpoint without attempting to rip out the jugular vein of a TSA agent or fellow passenger, which generally results in their being denied boarding (especially if they are flying on Southwest).
.
By that definition, I must be one of the undead.
*checks pulse*…
um….
hmmm….
wait…. there’s something… no, hmm.
*removes watch band*
whew, there it is
You have a point!
However, most of us who are NOT undead manage to resist the impulse.
I have actually felt like going ‘Zombie’ everytime I have to deal with the twits from TSA. They must recruit all of the Type-A folks from society.
I have a certain amount of sympathy for them, as it’s got to be a mind-numbingly tedious job, I doubt they get paid much, they have to sit in the freakin’ airport all day, and if they screw up and miss something, lots of people could get dead pretty quickly.
But, yeah, they can be annoyingly picky.
If I may, I’ll give you an example of my most recent experience with the TSA. Back in September I had to fly to the States into L.A. (which I believe is the worst sort of TSA hell known to man) on my way to other places. Since I had a 6 hour layover, I thought I would go out front and have a smoke. Well, one of the TSA people stamped my boarding pass with a ’special’ stamp, which meant that everytime I came through security I was going to get the whole enchilada as far as the search went. After the 6th time, these people knew me by name and visa versa, but I still had to do the entire process.
-
On the other hand, flying into Sydney was no where near as bad. And to top it off (even though I’m sure it’s mind numbing here as well) they actually have a sense of humor.
-
The bottom line is, TSA should teach inter-personal skills.
Wow. And yes. And, in my opinion, airports without smoking lounges of some kind on the gate side of security are a form of hell.
I never understood the whole ‘boarding security’ thing anyway. When I’ve flown from a small airport in my Mom’s hometown with almost no security measures into a much larger airport (Houston, Dallas, take your pick), we’re already behind the security gates and don’t have to be rechecked. Security breach, anyone?
Oh sure froo, tell the terrorists how to win, why don’t you?
Hey, apparently, I’m just doing this because I’m from Texas and want the terrorists her so I can unleash my bloodthirsty longings and take down Al Queada with my fully automatic machine gun that I keep in the front seat of my pick up truck, right next to my pit bull and bag of crack.
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But that’s only if you ask Fester
Airport smoking lounges (the few I’ve been in while flying from Indy to El Paso) always remind me of cages at the zoo. I can almost hear the driver to one of these people carts saying, “and on the right we have the endangered species smokus frustratus as you can see they are a dying breed…”
I liked the airport in Malawi. It was as slow as any other but people were just calm, polite, no stress. It makes such a difference.
One of my favorite airports for several reasons [link]
it looks like they’ve made some major improvements since I was there 6 years before this pic was taken.
Jesus could fly?
What version of the Bible was that? It sounds much cooler than the version I read!
The Holy Bible – MARVEL Edition?
If Marvel wrote the Bible, Christianity would be a lot cooler religion.
Actually it was an underuse of the comma.
The serial comma (the comma before the word “and” of the last item in a series), while often left out, is (by standard rules) supposed to be there; omitting it would be the incorrect thing to do, though that’s still debatable.
Given that “I personally didn’t find it funny” is an independent clause and starts with the word “but”, it needs either a comma preceding it, or a period and capitalization of the word “but.” The latter is not as widely accepted, though artistic license allows it without issue.
The word “personally” in that sentence is not necessary for understanding the phrase in itself. If you remove it, you’re left with “but I didn’t find it funny.” This is perfectly acceptable, and therefore the word “personally” is ‘unnecessary information’ and should be offset with commas: i.e. “but I, personally, didn’t find it funny.”
Lark88 actually used one less comma than he or she should have. Granted, it might have looked cleaner with a semicolon before “but”, but this is still correct.
<3
You spend a little too much time in the arts of the world’s hardest language… which is good for me, ‘cos I spend that mind-numbing snore-fest to employ my greatest skill: PILLAGING!!
Yay for someone else noticing that!!
I know! I’m offended too. I mean, everyone knows Jesus is a VAMPIRE not a ZOMBIE. That’s why you have to drink his blood. Zombies don’t even have blood.
Seth, I think I’m falling in love with you…and remember…when the Zombies arrive, they’ll eat the fat ones first!!
*Gets on exercise bike*
Yes…that is why you also eat those carbohydrate-filled wafers. It was all a ploy to get us ready for the Zombie feast in the end. D*mn religious conspiracies!
But the aliens are coming, and they take the skinny blondes first!
*is grateful vikings don’t come skinny–can’t swing a sword without heft!*
I feel I started something irreversible…
;o)
If they take the skinny blondes first, that should take care of the ‘air’ problem..
I don’t have to run faster than them. I just have to run faster than you. <3
LOL! Very true..
Zombie Jesus killed my father and raped my mother.
Then he ate my ham sandwich and pissed in my sandbox!
.
TOO SOON!!!!
When the second coming comes, and the dead arise to recieve their final judgement, this is exactly what I expect. Including Jesus giving everybody the “Lindy”!
*anger*
It’s a Zombie Walk, they happen in a lot of cities randomly.
Y’know, as long as it is a zombie “walk” and not a zombie “sprint” like in 28 Days and I Am Legend I am okay with it. Zombies that run faster than I do are just wrong and I protest mightily.
The very thought of zombies that can run faster than I can fills me with a soul-shattering dread!
Of course, given that I am old, fat and unfit, even that girl-zombie that took ten minutes to cross Shaun’s tiny backyard would be able to catch me.
I’d better start exercising. And studying the Manual.
It’s like that nightmare where you’re slogging through the mud slower and slower while you’re trying not to imagine the scariest shit possible following you.
*looks around guiltily*
They weren’t zombies in 28 Days and I am Legend. They were infected.
I am Legend they were more like vampires than zombies, but yes, it was a virus affecting living people, not a rising of the previously dead.
Another religion lol…
Ach, Here we go…
I know, that’s three in a row.
Welcome to Pundit Chapel!
Correction, three out of the last four. Forgot about our sleepy guys in the previous lol…
Haha they have one of these every Halloween in Portland, Oregon. It’s pretty big and for an hour or so, zombies take over downtown Portland. I’m not sure if there was a jesus there though…. That would have been hysterical. Way to go Virginia!
Isn’t this the background premise of Futurama?
nice rack on the girl right beside Jesus
That’s the first thing I always notice too [link]
Boomer!
My copy of The Zombie Survival Guide says nothing about Sons of God.
Oh my Harry, we’re doomed.
a little known fact:the NRA is acually an ancient society of farmers created to stop the zombie uprising in the year 2010…… june 10th….. at 6:03 pm….. in a peanutbutter factory in mexico….. in the back left corner…. right behind pablo’s old desk.
Nice….
ZOMG!!!! ZOMBIE NAZIS!!!
Oh crap..
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*runs for cover from The Wang*
*makes popcorn. pulls out a beach chair. opens a beer*
I would, but I just don’t have the stomach for it today.
*hands eps a gingerale*
Much better! Can I have some popcorn?
Absolutely! Can’t wait for the show–I think it starts tomorrow morning?
Groovy! I have all the time in the world..
And thus the undead did cower in fear of that which was mightier than they. A quiver rod of might and flesh, The Wang, shown like a tanned tower of awesome shadowing their feeble frames. For what do the dead fear since they do not fear death?
THEY FEAR THE WANG!!!
And how does the Wang feel today? All better?
The Wang is a bit down still today but well enough to work when the economy forces it. So I have a cough but I have seduced enough good vibe out of my Dayquil bottle to feel a bit less like there is a chain wrapped about my chest.
So for the most part, yes, though I am still a cranky wad of mildly miserable. I am medicating myself with hot cocoa so I’ll be fine.
Ah, hot cocoa, exactly what I’d prescribe. I’d say take a side of m&m’s when things get really bad. *hugs*
It does help smooth the throat and voice over, which is nice. The coughing is wearing me out though. *hugs and dozes off*
*puts DWN’s feet up and tucks a blanket around him*
*is too tired to make a lewd comment*
*throws popcorn in appreciation for the show*
*noms some popcorn in sleep and smiles*
This particular ‘Jesus’ reminds me of Mick Foley from WWF..
Ooooooh, now that you mention it….all he needs is a half-torn-off ear and he’ll be complete!
Wow that’s pretty good
OMFG zombie walk!! i had a zombie jesus at mine last year.
don’t forget! april 12th is zombie jesus day this year!
In our town we have a Zombie convention.
Cleverly named “ZombieCon.”
(I didn’t care to wade through the crap comments to see if anyone else had posted this.)
Yeah, but do you have a ‘Jesus’ appear?
I think he roams around the Stations of the Cross exhibit.
It’s the Asbury Park Zombie Walk!
LOL now we need Leon Kennedy or Chris Redfield!!!
Haha. Leon Kennedy = awesome.
*Waits impatiently for Resident Evil 5*
I believe this is the Grand Rapids zombie walk where they broke pittsburg’s record for most people.
I saw it on discovery. It was talking about more and more area’s having zombie walks. This may be pittsburg, the grandrapids one looked like it was souly night time.
That this is thriller, thriller night
‘Cause I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try
Thriller, thriller night
So let me hold you tight and share a
Killer, diller, chiller, thriller here tonight
‘Cause this is thriller, thriller night
Girl, I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try
Thriller, thriller night
So let me hold you tight and share a killer, thriller, ow!
“Jesus is a fat white boy.
Not what everyone expected.”
>_>
<_<
I recaptioned this… I think n8 and Fester will appreciate it the most. Link to my stuff in name as usual.
I liked it. In the “breaking news” format, the photo has handles so you can fit
the picture to the “screen,” so the blue areas to each side won’t show, and, in
this case, the (portrait oriented) photo won’t be small.
Ya, I was focused on making the silly idea and I even ended up with crappy grammar. I need to redo it. Stupid sick brain making me lazy.
Nice!
That girl beside Jesus, the one with the gray shirt… the fake blood on her shirt is done really well. Yeah, just had to say that.
I want to participate in a zombie walk one day.
thats the zombie walk…we have one very year in raleigh, nc. people just dress up as zombies and walk around downtown. its pretty freakin fun.
Man, Jesus can be kind of a jerk sometimes. I wouldn’t mind so much, but does he does to look that smug about it?
Some one has clearly played to many zombie games and is an extremist in their religion.
Jesus is one of my top-ten favorite zombies.
Ppl, that picture should be removed >_>, caption is kinda offensive x_x.
And some of the comments too.
Offensive how?
There’s been a few of these zombie walks in Boise, Id. I saw one a few months ago and nearly fell outta my cab laughing as several zombies attacked a girl’s truck demanding her brains!
yoo nigga (:
okay this is not grand rapids zombie walk we did it in the dark and the zombie jesus there is 6 foot 5 inches tall and was my husband…not his guy
oh and if you would like to see that you can reply and i will show you an actual picture
I remember this… it was a Zombie Walk, and one man decided to go as a different type of undead!
WAY TO GO JEBUS… and after easter comes halloween where Jesus decided to play a joke on his dad and bring back EVERYONE!!! He also pulled a LEEEERROOOOY nnnnJJEEEEENNNKIIIIINSSS!!!!