FAITH
FAITH
Not quite as effective as two inches of bullet-proof glass.
(Pope Benedict XVI)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: scum
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Meh. Let’s get back to the pen*s jokes.
OMG I R GET FIRST LOL!!!1111
It’s good to see a lol with my kind of sense of humor. This shall henceforth be known as one of the Ten Greatest LOLs of Pundit Kitchen
Use egg whites to remove gum on clothing. Brush egg white onto gum with a toothbrush. Let sit for 15 minutes and then launder on the items normally.
Ok, but how does one remove the stain of deep-fried dog testicles with cat-blood gravy?
FrooFrou needs this info ASAP.
i know we give random info to “first”-ers… but does this actually work? i’ve heard of peanut butter being good for removing gum from clothes and hair… but new household tricks are always helpful!
I…don’t know. I just found it online.
Now, I can vouch for the efficacy of WD-40 for getting gum out of hair and off surfaces, but I’m not sure about laundry.
wd40 + laundry = bad.
That does not surprise me. Personal experience?
yeah. It thought it would remove grease from my clothing for some odd reason. Now that spot on those jeans smell like Permanent WD40
Bummer. On the other hand, I was hoping for an awesome Laundromat Fire Story, so it’s a little disappointing.
Icecubes aren’t too bad for gum–stiffens the gum so you can peel it off some.
Yeah, our method is to throw the article of clothing in the freezer for a bit.
Oh, so you follow the “Panty Raid” method? First one to fall asleep gets their gum removed from their clothes!
You’re just trying to make us think about holding you down and stripping your undies off. I’m onto your game…
but are you into their game?
by the way, peanut butter works great for getting tree sap off of skin and hair too, but not recommended for clothes, as the peanut oil can leave an unsightly grease stain
And, these days, give you samonella.
Only if you get it out of candy or something, the jar kind’s oke this time.
the best way to get gum out of hair is with olive oil. messy but true
Spray hair spray on ink marks and launder as usual. It works!
Also, as the daughter of an engineer, I was taught that if it should move and doesn’t, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn’t, use duct tape.
This is my life’s philosophy.
I think my hubby and kids would be mad if I sprayed them with WD-40 when it’s time to do the dishes …
I agree with this.
I’ve always wondered why, if the pope is supposed to be God on Earth, why does he need bulletproof cars?
Because God works in mysterious ways…and so do bullets.
Oh bullets are very direct, just the shooter that has issues.
Yeah, bullets abide by the laws of physics.
Because it’s not a problem with the Pope’s lack of faith, it’s his security detail’s lack of faith in other people’s faith.
At least, in most of the explanations I’ve heard contrived by people who actually care to follow that stuff.
I trust that a giant rock won’t fall on my house, but I still have a shotgun for the smaller problems! *impish grin*
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Some people belive that while God could keep you perfectly safe, you are soposed to use the brains He gave you and take appropriate precautions. It’s the things that are totaly out of your hands that you are soposed to go with the blind faith thing.
But again, that is a rather practical way to look at things, more of your every-day-Christian types.
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From what I understand, Catholics belive the pope is infallible, that he is the voice of God on earth, and that the pope was chosen and blessed by God to lead people. If the pope is infallible, and if he is chosen by God you would THINK that maybe the pope would be safe from harm so long as God still has a use for him.
Practicality gets taken completely out of the equation when a human is placed on so high a pedestal. Since the pope is so far above all other humans, God’s blessing and good will are what protect him. The rule of “use the brains God gave you” don’t apply to the pope, so why should he be hidding in a little box?
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I do not belive the pope is infallible. He is human, and capable of the same mortal failings and weaknesses as the rest of us.
If the pope realy was what so many belive him to be he would be safe strolling down the street.
Covered below… Papal infallibility only extends to matters pertaining to Dogman and Church.
Rest of it typical Christian spinning on the usual bullcrap…
*shrugs* I’m still much less impressed with him hidding in his little box… proly should have just said that and left out all my other chatter.
Probably wise…
If the Son of God got murdered by people, why should the pope be safe>?/
Are you saying this as someone who actually believes that or are you just being a smart ass? ’cause if that’s what you really believe, you need to go back to Christianity 101.
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The way the story goes, no, the son of god was not murdered by anyone. He was sacrificed, offered, handed over, by god the father as an offering to, well, to god the father, so that he didn’t have to send all people to hell.
If the son of god, or even god the father had tried to stop this ritual sacrifice well, all hell would have broken loose.
I don’t think you mean to say that you think the Pope is being handed over to be sacrificed do you? And if that is what you’re saying, then don’t you think it’s wrong to try to stop it by using bullet-proof glass or any other means of protection?
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In the end people, please remember crosses don’t kill the son of god, people do.
Actually, just going by what the Bible says, the Son of God could have at any time asked His Father to send a dozen legions of angels to save Him. All Hell wouldn’t have broken loose, but the prophesies, as they were, would not have been fulfilled.
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As to the rest of that post, I’m leaving it alone.
Yeah, that was just a little bit of poetic license.
I’m still embroidering it on a pillow. The other
part was too long…
When I said poetic license, I was actually referring to the comment “all hell would have broken loose”.
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What I assume you’re embroidering is
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I’ll tell you a secret, but you can’t tell anyone else. This ash person seems to think that was about her, but I was just looking for a mini flame thrower. What I was originally going to put there was:
Please remember, spay or neuter your Christians.
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but I figured I’d go with the more friendly ‘gun’ reference rather than the more controversial ‘pet’ reference. Pets just really seems to set people on edge. However, I do think it would be a nice piece of embroidery for the pillow on the other side of the couch.
Oh yeah, and I want pictures of the pillows when they’re done
You are a cruel task master, indeed!
*writes new quote*
*orders more embroidery supplies*
Why would Hay-soos need a legion of angels to save him?
Also, if someone stuffed a sock in the tailpipe of il popa mobile, d00d would be boned.
Did you really have to put it that way?
I ended up picturing the Pope with a chubby.
Thanks a lot …
What? You think he doesn’t get them?
[insert requisite alter-boy joke here]
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I just really didn’t want to picture it – and now you’ve made me do it again!
Did you picture how it would poof out his pope
robe in the front?
(Gee, I hope that didn’t conjure up another
image…)
LOL
Ok, i hate you all.
I’m just going to picture him walking around with that big
ridiculous pointed, jewel-encrusted hat hanging off the front.
All Rho mentioned was a Pope Tent, the jewel encrusted hat is YOUR fetish, apparently…
Nah, I think I was just referring to Fester’s crusty meat from the other thread.
I meant his crusty jewels of course
That well know source of accurate history and science…
I was not quoting it as accurate history and science. I was using it to refute a point that ACSIS made. He invoked the Bible, I continued to use the Bible in that example since there was precedent. Had he used The Screwtape Letters in an example, I would have used it in my answer.
Screwtape letters… Haven’t read them in aaaaaaaaages… Good book, tho…
Actually, no, he didn’t cite the bible, but
dogma. The bible really doesn’t say much
as to the WHY of Jesus death, just that it
was foretold, in some pretty weak extant
prophecies that were not as clear as some
of Michel De Nostredam, but we’ll let that lie.
The ‘lamb’ was slaughtered in atonement for
the sins of man, but, in terms of the Tarsean
bull crap that Eusebius made mainstream
at Nicea, the lamb WAS god, sacrificing
himself to himself, otherwise he couldn’t
forgive man for what was bascially God’s
screw up in Eden in the first place… which is
illogical…
@Fester
In all fairness Froo didn’t say ‘cite’ she said ‘invoked’ which by relating the story told in the bible, I did. She responded in like manner. She didn’t cite, she made a comment based on her understanding of what was in the same book.
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Anyway, that god sacrificed god in order to appease god for god’s failures is one of those circular references that I love so much about the whole thing. Like the simpler one invoked by people with no understanding as to why they believe what they believe, where the bible is true because it says it’s true.
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Wasn’t it also at Nicea under Constantine where they decided that god was three, three, three gods in one, forever making Christianity a polytheistic religion in spite of all claims to mono-theism? And why no back history of the son and the spirit? I’m mean what were they doing for eternity prior to 2k years ago?
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Other than Judaism and Islam, are there any monotheistic religions?
Bahá’í?
Apparently so. Thanks.
Technically, Hinduism is mono-theist, the
‘gods’ being ‘functional interfaces’
The Trinity owes more to the Tarsean idea that
Jesus, God, and the resurrected Jesus were
all ‘Gods’ while in the West there was only
one God and Jesus was a prophet. Eusebius
came up with a way of making them both
correct and heretical at the same time, and
utilised the Mithraic variant of the old sun,
the new sun, and the Mithraic bull all being
the same while discrete…
I’ve always been under the belief that it’s a poly-theistic religion.
Looking it up on wiki, it looks to be one of the more ‘confused’ or at least loose in it’s own definition of itself, religions out there.
From the article;
I’ve known a few Hindus, but we’ve never discussed their religious beliefs.
I did however ask once about their beliefs in reincarnation. Since my understanding was that they believed they were continually reborn into either ‘higher’ or ‘lower’ lifeforms until they achieved Nirvana. I was curious what they considered to be the lowest form of life. Any guesses as to what the answer was? (no cheating).
Republicans!
Oh hell no. I can name a three of their gods without giving it a second thought.
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In no particular order:
Sex, Money, Power,
So Republicans aren’t the lowest form of life?
I has a sad.
Hahha
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Wow, sorry. I messed up! I thought you were listing Republicans as mono-theistic.
I didn’t realize you were answering the other question.
Remember though, I’m talking about Hindu belief, not American knowledge.
YAY!! Okay, w/out Wiki (I swear), I’m going
to guess “dung beetle.”
Midden digger?
See, that’s where my mind goes immediately as well, except that dung and the dung beetle serve a vital purpose. We just think of dung as useless and dirty, when it’s not useless, and dirty depends on your definition.
I never would have guessed this life form. In the modern world we do have a use for it, but I don’t know if they did way back when. I’ll give you two hints.
It’s a plant.
It apparently takes huge amounts of water to grow.
@Fester
When google only returns one English result for something, you gotta know it’s obscure.
@ACSIS: Lotus? It can grow out in stagnant
water, so that’s my guess.
Sugar Cane.
The conversation happened at the beginning of a business meeting so there wasn’t time to get more info, and I never followed up.
In Hinduism there is no distinct “lowest” form… it’s a very loose hierarchy, bugs and worms and those sorts of things being towards the bottom. Mostly your incarnation is based on what Karmic debt you owe, so it varies.
I’ve never heard of reincarnation as a plant… and who were you talking to?
Scratch that, found reincarnation as a plant. *sigh*
He was an Indian Hindu man doing some training and contract work at my company about four years ago. I’m just going by what he told me, and like I said I didn’t do any follow up with him. I’ve always remembered it because I thought it was odd. I think I’d never thought of plant life as an option for reincarnation and wondered what was so bad about sugar cane.
It gets ground rather violently… although I can think of worse things.
I did a google wap?
Almost [link]
LOL! Did you try Googling just “midden?”
16.7 Mil hits. Ya, that narrows it down.
I would have thought the lowest form of live was either Gilbert Godfried or possibly a merkin.
Exactly. Same with the anti-christ, Christians should celebrate when he comes along and do their best to defend him, because he has to fulfil the prophesy. Just like any well meaning fool who saved Jesus would have screwed it up for everyone, and how Judas was actually a hero.
“In the end people, please remember crosses don’t kill the son of god, people do.”
lolz yes ‘tard, that’s exactly what I said. And no, I don’t believe, tho I am a pastor’s daughter.
…God has no grandchildren…
not that they admitted in the Gospels, anyway…
The aforementioned saying is one of our minister’s favourites. He means that you’re not a christian because your parents are Christians and took you to church every Sunday…
Except that is why most Christians are Christian. Simply saying it’s not true doesn’t change the facts.
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And it’s why most Muslims are Muslim, and Jews are Jewish, and some atheists are atheist, but I don’t think most. I think most atheists came out of one of the above religions.
That’s why Christians CALL themselves Christian. Going along with AC’s statement, being in a garage doesn’t make you a car anymore than going to church every Sunday makes you a Christian.
I’ve heard the car/garage analogy many times, and it’s still a bad one.
You can’t choose to be a car, but you can choose to be a Christian.
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Everyone can pretty much agree on what is a car, but so far whenever someone tries to define what makes a Christian, someone else will come along and tell them they’re wrong. Case in point would be this comment, and your response [Link]
Until you can actually define it, it’s going to be tough for you to definitively state what it isn’t.
Actually, the word ‘Religion’ just meant ‘the
faith of one’s parents’. It was Christian
hubris that made a ‘religion’ a sect…
You challenging Ubr for being a loudmouth cretin, there scum?
Huh?
Ok, taken out of context it sounds stupid. In context it meant that I don’t believe that most atheists are atheist because they were raised in an atheist household, but became atheists later in life by choosing sanity over delusion. I guess it is a poorly constructed sentence.
Who are you calling scum, ubr or me?
Case of wither your bad grammar, or my
usual seeing the worst in people. Unreserved apology…
hey fester, if you don’t have anything nice to say about someone don’t say anything at all…
NP. It even happens to the worst of us.
I’m ridiculously fond of Unc’s vitriol.
I’m ridiculously fond of Jane’s addiction.
That’s because you actually get the joke…
@Rho: Yeah well, you know what, I’m done with Sergio (that douchebag).
@Unc: Or maybe I just like crusty old Englishmen…
and when you peel the crust off, there’s a salty, meaty, jelly underneath
And here I was just craving gravy and jello…
Jane, let’s not fight…
Let’s compromise, okay?
*holds up calendar*
You don’t cus like a pastor’s daughter.
Some of my happiest memories… *sigh*
*Wanders of whistling The September Song*
I think the Pope is supposed to be gods representative on Earth not a god itself, but, yes, you would think that an omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent and omnivorous god would be able to at a minimum, slap the bullet out of the way, if not actually, you know, stop the shooter in the first place.
omnivorous? i’m pretty sure that the pope can eat anything put before him, whether animal or vegetable…
Actually, I was referring to the god, not the pope. I threw that in there to see if anyone was actually paying attention, very good.
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That is one way god could stop the shooter, by eating them before they take the shot.
That is what Omnivorous means, dude. You eat both plants and animals.
I was waiting for someone to catch THAT…
I am a master of the blatantly obvious…
Thanks DWN. I stared at ubr’s response for a minute with my mouth hanging open like some sort of fish. I wasn’t quite sure how I should respond, but I’m glad to see you already took care of it.
Did you just call God omnivorous? O.o
Even more importantly… could God bake a pie so big that He couldn’t eat it?
He COULD eat it, but he’d hate himself at his next Weight Watchers weigh in.
they put the Pope behind bulletproof glass because Dick Cheney has been known to frequent papal outings, and they do not want any “accidents”
Off to the right it says “Saint on FAITH” and I keep expecting an actual
sainted decree accompanied by the presence of God
I had a similar thought when I saw it earlier.
That reminds me of the time you and I constituted
Death…Rho…Death…Rho up there.
Yes, that was highly awesome and odd.
what’s worse is I have a girfriend named Faith. but that would be a whole different kind of website.
*Pbbbt* Screen-wipe, please?
sorry, can I get you a fresh drink, on the house?
well, actually Divine intervention has stopped a bullet before– at Pope John Paul II. He says the Virgin Mary put her hand in front of the bullet, that was headed directly into his heart. It hit his arm and barely hurt him.
And we shall not test the Lord. So we use the glass.
So what you’re saying is that the most powerful being in existence, the one who created everything, knows everything, is everywhere etc, can’t be bothered to save the life of what I guess I’d phrase as his ‘best friend’, his confidant, his ‘right-hand’ here on Earth?
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That’s what you’re saying? That would be ‘testing’ him, putting him out?
Damn, I knew some of the Greek gods were arrogant and self-serving, but yours seems to win the prize.
Even though I know you don’t have the slightest bit of interest, let me explain, because I have a quite pleasant voice to listen to when I speak.
Basically, faith is belief without needing proof. Thus, you don’t test the Lord because you don’t need to test him, because you have faith.
That said, There’s nothing that says we can’t test the effectiveness of bulletproof glass, and if someone wants to test the Pope’s resistance to bullets, they’re gonna have to work for it.
Well, I have a voice made for radio, and a face to match.
Ok, but it’s not testing anyone. All I’m saying is that if this god person really exists, why wouldn’t s/he (it, they) (my kingdom [such as it is] for a viable, gender-neutral pronoun in English) simply say: ‘yo Pope dude, you’re my homie, and I ain’t gonna let nothing happen to yous’. If this god is who you all seem to think s/he is, it would take on trillionth of a trillionth of a second and there’d be no need for the bullet-proof glass. If this god cares so little about the man in the ruby slippers, why does anyone think it would give a rat’s a$$ about us?
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According to the Christian Bible, your god doesn’t even have to intervene, the Popes own faith could make it happen, or aren’t you familiar with Matthew 17:20?
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And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you..
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I mean, if you really want to get into it, I can understand why it lets children starve; lets parasites eat out their eyeballs, allows agonizing diseases to ravage the population. It’s more fun that way!
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It just makes things more interesting, right? And that’s how you learn! I mean, who didn’t pull legs off of an ant or the wings off of a butterfly or something similar as a kid? It’s all in good fun, right? It’s how you learn about the critters and how they’ll act. Of course, if I’d been the one who actually created the ant, I don’t think I’d have had to pull it apart or burn it with the magnifying glass in order to determine effect, but hey, maybe I’m just smarter than your god…
You’re getting into an argument about free will here, and while I’d love to throw my hat into the ring on this one, I have neither the time nor the want to start a pissing match between atheists and Christians.
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Suffice it to say that your mind is made up, there is nothing I could say that would change your view of God, and that’s fine. You are entitled. I prefer to think that there is more to this life than ‘life sucks, then you die’. I am entitled to that.
There was a comment I made on this caption (I don’t remember which comment) and my first thought after posting it was, ooo, I’m gonna get it from Froo!
As if you can’t tell, I do like these discussions, and I respect it when people stand up for and can justify their beliefs. I don’t think you can blame me or many others for being more than a little bit flabbergasted by many of the claims which are made in the name of any of the religions. God is all powerful, yet can’t or won’t protect you. Have the faith of a mustard seed and move a mountain. No mountains being moved. No severed limbs growing back.
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People like JWs or Christian Scientists, believe that god will heal them, and it would be testing god (and your faith in god) to go to a doctor, so they don’t. Others believers in the same god think it would be testing god to not go to a doctor (ie the bullet-proof glass) so you do go, and you do use bullet-proof glass. Each group knows that they and only they are right and that all of the others are going to hell (or whatever other suitable punishment there is in the belief system).
Believe it or not, I’m not trying to change your mind or anyone’s mind. I would like to think that something I say might make people ask enough questions so that at least they know what they believe and why. So many people only believe in this stuff because their parents did. Many others come to believe in a time of stress and continue to believe due to peer pressure (ie support in the church, friendship, commonalities).
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I’m not against you Froo (and I’d even share my deep-fried monkey testicles in awkward-human sauce with you).
I don’t think you’re against me, but you’ve got your
I made the comment to a
mind made up. So do I
friend the other day that I was actually glad that I have
so many atheist and agnostic friends who fight with me
about religion, because it has truly tested my mettle. I
always worried that discussions like this would shake
my faith. Instead, I find that it has cemented it more. I
can’t explain to you why I believe the way I do. It’s
certainly not because my parents do, although I’m positive
that being raised a certain way started me out to think this
way. My faith is a personal revelation that I’ve had based
on what I’ve read, what I’e personally seen, and what I
can infer with my tiny little human brain.
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I think you’re oversimplifying the concept of God by
expecting him to always protect His own vs. never protecting
anyone because ‘it’s fun to watch’.
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But you’re right about the different sects having their
own views of God. Every one of them feels that everyone
else is going to Hell. I think that’s a pretty narrow box
to put God in. I personally believe that there is one way
to Heaven, but ultimately, that’s not up to me. That’s up
to God.
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You and I are on the same page (mark it on your
calender!!!!) about religion. People should never believe
ANYTHING simply because their parents did. It’s a good
starting point, but you should never stay there. The
same could be said for politics, or anything else that is
a driving factor in your life.
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In the spirit of my hippie Christian beliefs, I hereby raise
a glass of monkey testicles and toast you, my atheist
friend! *clink*
Salud!
I have no doubt there are many things on which we can agree and manyt things on which we never will, which is pretty much the same as everyone I know.
ps
Did we just invent a new drink? Add the vodka and instead of a stalk of celery, add a tall thin slice of banana and I think we’ve got ourselves a ‘Bloody Monkey’
In regards to “Everyone knows they’re right”, I’m reminded of a joke about fighter pilots:
A squadron full of fighter pilots sit down for a mission briefing, which the commander starts off with: “I’ve got bad news, this mission is going to be so tough, that the best case prediction is that only one of you will come back alive.”
The pilots, stunned, quietly pause to look at eachother, each man thinking, “Oh man, those poor guys!”
Going with the “God gave you the miracle of a brain, USE IT” school of theology, one would think we might try to impress our maker by using what he gave us to produce marvelous things like bullet-proof glass (and modern medicine for those times when the glass might break, etc.)
I seem to recall a parable or something along those lines about two servants being given a small some of money. One buried his money for safekeeping, while the other invested it and eventually bought his own land. While I think it kind of raw that the more frugal servant got berated for not risking the money he was given, the point of the story was that it was better to use your gifts to get something greater rather than just sit on them and count on your master to look after you.
TBH, the Chrisitan view is pretty much ‘Life is short and
brutal, since without god we’re all filthy animals’ is a lot
more nihilistic than ‘Life sucks, then you die’… The whole
‘reward in heaven’ and ‘faith not service’ ideas just gives
people the excuse to sit on their fat asses… and the whole
concept of ‘will of God’ and ‘imprecatory’ prayer abrogates
the concept of free will, while the same Pro-Life Christians
advocate the death penalty, since they’re just doing what
the Lord would do if He had the facts of the matter in front
Him.
“I have neither the time nor the want to start a pissing match between atheists and Christians.”
Just splitting hairs here, but the argument is actually Christians v. everyone else; I, for instance, am a joyfully polytheistic pagan, and I don’t get the whole free will argument either.
That’s because it’s bollocks… it’s more a matter of
‘free probabilities’… one’s training, upbringing and
environmental programming makes some choices a
heavier weighted option than others, but free will
presupposes that one is operating in a vacuum to
carry out any deed. It’s harder to stop someone
who has no fear of death or punishment than someone
who does. Do I think some of my friends are
murderers? No… but by the same token, I’d not
wake them by shaking them…
Technically, I’m an Autotheist, but that’s neither here nor there. Personally, I do not believe that any one religion has got it completely right. BUT, if you look at the majority of organized religions, they have many commonalities. There is always 1 high god, ( or just 1 god ) and a group of lesser gods (or angels). they all tell many of the same stories i.e. High god’s son on earth, great flood with only one family spared, etc. So this leads me to believe that there is at least some grain of historical truth there. I think that all of the different “religions” could be more accurately described as regional interpretations. In my ever so pompous, er, humble opinion, it boild down to these few things. 1. be good to each other, because what goes around comes around. 2. believe in a power higher than yourself, because the entire world around you is too fantastic and amazing to be just coincidence. and 3. believe what you want to believe, after all, we all need something to turn to when times are bad. there. I’ve said my piece.
I’m all for live and let live… it’s when people start bandying ‘universal truths’ and trying to legislate their faith into my life I start thinking it’s time to get armed…
Of course they have a grain of truth. Mythologies were the ancients’ way to explain real life events in the best way they could. They knew nothing of electrons or weather patterns, so lightning was angry gods. Floods, earthquakes, volcanoes, all angry gods. Good weather, bumper crops, sunshine and lollipops comes from happy gods (good cheese comes from happy cows). The big difference was did your culture interpret them as multiple gods, or one. This is the real origin of lobbying too. How did your culture attempt to influence your gods? What rituals did they perform in order to get lollipops for themselves and to have an earthquake swallow your enemy? How many of those rituals are still performed in some form today where the people don’t even understand the origin?
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It’s also no surprise that many of the different religions contain similar if not exactly the same events (ie the flood, the male offspring/savior being sacrificed – the three day waiting period…). They all grew from each other. They incorporated stories from conquered tribes into their own mythos, and continued forward. We know this happened in more ‘modern’ times with Christianity incorporating pagan holidays and rituals and calling them their own (ie Christmas and Easter). It’s nothing new. People just forget about it as time goes by and assume that theirs is the only true belief.
thank you, for helping to make my point more succinctly. I am on some strong meds right now, and finding it hard to make my fingers type what my brain is thinking.
Point of Order, there. You’re relatively new
to PK, and may not be aware of all of the
rules. You’re not allowed to do strong meds
unless you’ve brought enough to share with
everyone.
Oh yeah, and you’ve been her what, since sometime in November?
That makes you a vetaran? No, it actually makes you a wannabe know-it-all beyotch who lacks a life. What did you do before you trolled here and treated everyone like crap? Are you actuallly out of a job now that the republican s are out of office? Your arrival here is pretty darn coinky-dink with the rethug election loss, don’tcha think?
Lahooo-zur!
Okay, that was funny.
What, no imediate flippant response? Or are you crying on your fake email for Polly to come and help you? Your simpering minions are not on to protect you right now?
Not everyone missed how mean and fake you are.
Super funny. Too bad you’re a fake.
Aw, it thinks it has a funny. You know, they make pills to control anger now. Perhaps you should invest in a few.
FYI, She’s been here much longer than November, and much longer than you. Toddle along now. I’m sure the daycare is looking for you. You should really change your diapers before you sneak out, you know.
@Froo: Down girl!
She’s just a troll, in a sock, calling me a fake.
She also thinks my “minions” “protect” me.
Perhaps, without this “protection,” I will
surely die (Oh Noes!!) at her hands…
Funny stuff, all things considered.
Now, rhorho, quit lying. I saw your “first” post with this particular avatar, and it’s much later than froofrou seems to belive, or else you were socking as someone else prior to your posting pot?
Make it happen! Can’t wait???!!
rho? How does one apply to become one of your minions?
Does it pay well? (I’m running a bit low on internets).
Is there a deep background check (I’m hoping, um, no)
Are there benefits, like do I get a discount on sword wax or shield buffing?
Is there a lengthy training period?
Do we provide our own Troll-be-gone and other tools?
– if so, do you provide discount coupons.
.
Eagerly awaiting your response before I use up my last internet.
C U Next Tuesday, you ridiculous arrogant accusing b*tch.
Be done with people who aren’t doing anything wrong.
Make her show you when she started posting.
Pot an kettle.
NOVEMBER, or she’s a liar.
OooooOOOOooooOOOH!!!!!!
My Evil Monkey Overlord will be pleased that I have managed to infiltrate my way into Literal’s brain, causing decomposition from the inside out and fueling her paranoid and psychotic rants!
OOooooOOOOOOooooooOOOOOOOH!!!!!!
Phase One, complete! Now onto Phase Two and the eventual slapping of Literal by one of her own socks!
u no i’m rite!
go liar go!
Funny! Yer kewl!
Liar rho. Yew no it!
Hey! It’s working!!
One of us…
One of us…
Ok, well, I’m off to bed. Will the last sock standing please turn out the lights?
I’m sure someone will be along before morning to clean up any spilled thread.
thanks
@Literal: Not that I owe you, but I posted off
and on since September or so, and had a
LOL on the front page in October.
There is no RANK on PK, and my comment
about a point of order was a joke, that some-
how set your crazy off.
Now for the REALITY CHECK:
You’re the liar, fraud, plagiarist, multi-self
voter with multiple profiles, etc. You’re only
angry because you’ve been exposed. You
have done all this to yourself, so blaming me
makes you look silly, stupid, and batsh!t
crazy. Go ahead: Blame me if it makes you
feel better, but you may want to take the
reflective surfaces out of your house,
because you can’t escape the truth of who
you are.
And now, back to funny stuff…
@ACSIS: Sorry, but I had a “thing” here.
*tucks ACSIS into bed with story books and
flashlight*
Sweet dreams!
Run, hide and cry. There are lots of us who like her lols, and you and your minioins can vote the m down all you want but they are still funnier than any you and your BS can make.
LOLOLOL!
rhorho,
Don’t be upset. I am following this, and tried to cut it off, but I killed my old account that I tried to send the notice with and thus PK ate it (killed the nappy headed hoe acct), so I am reverting to my old account to give you this message. Let’s see if it works, since I closed the msn. acct everyone knows and the other acct I was making lols with.
Take it easy; you are really a kind person. Ignore the asteriskholes who are messing with you and the others I enjoy reading.
I’m not socking. I see no need, and I’m not after you for any reason. I’m not posting, I’m making lols in the morning and at noon. If you hate them, kill them. If not, enjoy them. Otherwise, no one posting is me.
ALL STOP IT PLEASE. Let it go.
Well, this account obviously still works.
I do enjoy reading you all. Don’t stop discussing the funny and b-tching about the unfunny
Truly awesome, and I thank you.
ok, i now know what a troll is, but what is a sock? besides what i have on my feet, of course….
btw, next time i’ll share my drugs, i swear!
A “sock” and “socking” is a reference to being a sock puppet, or posting (or attempting to post) under the username or in the persona of a different poster. Occasionally done in fun but most often with trollish intent.
“Socking” can also mean assuming a false
identity (not belonging to another) to say
something without consequences. That’s how
the term is used above.
I see….
…without consequences or for deliberately humorous effect… as a hypothetical, suppose you had made a post about, um…getting into a fender-bender in a parking lot. At that point, somebody might respond as “Saint’s insurance agent” or “Saint’s Car” or something. This hasn’t been done as much since we got the avatars as you are either obviously yourself or you have to go to the bother of using another email.
Or like when Musicmom said something about her archnemesis and I posted as Musicmom’s Archnemesis for humor. We went through a long period of time where we didn’t have avatars on the site, so there was a huge problem with certain people (*cough*megabob*cough*) creating multiple names for themselves and posting in support of themself, or just to be a general ass.
So what have we learned here?
Lack of meds sharing leads to socked trolls.
I don’t see it as a free will argument either, but I didn’t want to get into that point right then. I see it more as, ‘how much faith do you have in the power of your own faith?’ ie, is the outcome of day-to-day events going to be altered by the simple matter of your faith, whether due to gods direct intervention, or the faith itself having some kind of influence? If that’s true, is it a quantifiable change? Can you measure amount of faith in vs. effect out?
.
My point is that some people argue that the Pope should be riding around in the Popemobile for the same reason that believers shouldn’t jump out of an airplane without a parachute and then say, ok god, save me. That’s testing him and apparently he has little patience for idiots. To this, I can relate.
.
Other people, talking about the same god, say that if you jump out of that same airplane, you’d better not be wearing the parachute, because that would prove that you have no faith in god.
.
That’s not a free will argument. It’s more trying to figure out the temperament of your god and how best not to piss him/her off so as to avoid getting squashed at the denouement.
But he’ll screw your life up for a bet with Satan and a laugh… and get nasty if you tell him he’s being a prick, once he’s had your family die…
That story always bugged me. It’s inconsistent
with the rest of the stories in that it depicts God
and Satan on a relatively even playing field.
Somehow, it seems out of place.
And why would god care? He lives forever, I bet he gets bored and creates new life elsewhere.
If god did exist, he wouldn’t care. About anyone, lol He’s around FOREVER. Humans last less than a century (per person, not the species itself). In the time it takes him to blink, our species could die out. God wouldn’t give a shit (if he existed).
Obviously I don’t think he does, but that’s just me.
Are you an American?
Trust in God, but always pack heat…
“the revolver is the weapon of democracy”
I find it quite offending that the national anthem has “One nation, under God” in it, and that the quarter has In God we trust” written on it, not all Americans believe in it. Hell, Half of my generation don’t even have a true religion.
You mean the Pledge of Allegiance? Because the Star Spangled Banner doesn’t, unless it’s in some obscure later verse that I don’t know (possible, I admit…).
.
No it doesn’t, but the tune does come from an old British drinking song. I like that part.
Well crap. It does. I’m wrong. There are 4 sections (verses, whatever).
I’ve never seen or heard the other three, but they’re in the wiki article.
[link]
and here’s the line from the 4th: And this be our motto: ‘In God is our trust.’
.
Learn something new every once in a while…
Huh. Well, I guess we’ve all learned something! I’ve never heard the other three, either.
You were right that he meant the Pledge, since he said specifically “One nation, under God”, and that’s not what’s in the Anthem, but still I was very surprised that the word god is in there, and that it’s so much longer than we all knew.
.
I’m so glad this hasn’t ‘gotten out’. Not that I’m a baseball fan anyway, but can you imagine how much longer some of these divas would stretch out their performance? What would have happened with the Rosanne performance had she tried to continue? *shudders*
most school districts make the “under god” part optional for the kids. Personally, I prefer Robin Williams’ idea.. ” One Nation, Under Canada, and Above Mexico…”
true religion = jeans.
and half of your generation probably has more than one pair…
What in the world? If you’re on drugs, and you didn’t bring enough
for the rest of us, well…
*warms up eye lasers*
No, it’s actually a brand of jeans [link], not that I can either afford $300 jeans or think there’s actually jeans worth that much. I mean,just how good can they make your a$$ look, anyway?
Sacre bleu jeans!!
Thanks for the clue, there. From my POV, you’d have to be
pretty devoutly *something* to part with $300 for a pair of
jeans… Can you imagine?
Yeah, I’m not tithing that amount to the clothing gods. Hell, I feel like a spendthrift if I get Old Navy jeans that aren’t on sale!
Wait a minute…ubr brought this up — DUDE, tell me you aren’t wearing $300 jeans. Please.
True that! I abuse the clothes I own, messing with
gardening and stuff. Clothes cringe when I buy them,
knowing that they’re about to meet a most dire end…
Don’t you think that if God was going to walk the earth in human form (again) he would maybe make himself a leeeeetle better looking? Just a tiny bit?
You mean, Adam Levine from Maroon 5 ISN’T God on Earth?
One of many ways in which the Catholics might have been wrong. I think you may be insulting him by not accounting for the possibility of his being the God in Heaven as well, but I’m not into the whole “persecution” deal, you have fun with your heretical beliefs
Actually, I’m agnostic. I don’t have any beliefs, heretical or otherwise. The above was what is commonly refered to as sarcasm.
It’s a matter of practicality. I’m pretty sure old Benny (and JP before him) would be willing to trust to God for his security and essentially die a martyr if somebody shot him just for being the Pope. You don’t get the job these days without having that kind of faith.
But leaving the Pope unduly vulnerable to assasination would probably result in the position having a much higher turnover rate. Also, killing the Pope could result in a violent backlash from the sort of Catholics who don’t quite get what JC’s stance on that matter was. One of the drawbacks of having a figurehead is that if something bad happens to them, it can cause a holy war, something the church has decided to get out of the business of.
I think that is having a bit too hopeful of a stance on their thinking but I do like a bit of fresh faced hope in humanity in the evening. As for a Holy War, an actual Holy War might direct all the extremists to one place where they will kill each other off at once. Granted that is oversimplifying but I do like the mental image.
Did you see jesus camp? they’re getting them ready for the fighting infidels…..umm.. or is that backwards. ?? LOL
because before he used to ride around on a little scooter, and someone shot at him (not the current pope, this was a good while back) so now the new improved Pope-Mobile comes standard with bullet proof glass.
Thanks to Mr. Hallen for his amazing stories in History that provided this random bit of info. also thanks to Hallen for the creation of the term “Pope-Mobile” hahahaha
He’s not supposed to be God on Earth. You and all your Protestant friends are ignorant
Not all Protestants are “ignorant”. Please don’t paint all Protestants with the same brush, and I will refrain from doing the same about Catholics.
End of rant.
You’re the one who’s ignorant. The Catholic church has often mentioned the Pope being the representation of God on Earth. They think they have the authority to change the law of God, the 10 commandments being a great example. They took the 2nd commandment out, moved all the others up & made the 10th one up into two, in case you ask which. Excuse you.
I think wundawomun needs to loosen up the golden lasso just a little bit during those auto-erotic asphyxiation sessions…
None of that going on, but indeed, loosening up is good to do. I was at work when I read that & lately work has not been too fun.
Wha??? I think you’re confusing the pope with Jesus. Different guys.
Yah, the Pope has the Popemobile, Jesus has the Jesuscopter.
of course… those of us that are vehemently against the oppressive dictators *cough cough* ahem, religious leaders tend to be the types that also don’t think it’s ever right to shoot someone.
…then again perhaps they’re referring to the multitude of extremist Protestants that love their guns so much.
…or extremist Muslims with the same gun love (considering one shot John Paul II).
You really don’t know the history of the RCC, do you… nor their role in places like Northern Ireland… The one true faith at gunpoint is a problem of the Cults of Abraham since Moses said to kill all that breathes…
I think you misread the intent due to all the *coughing* in the middle. Read it this way:
of course… those of us that are vehemently against the oppressive dictators
*cough cough* ahem, religious leaderstend to be the types that also don’t think it’s ever right to shoot someone.At least that’s how I read it.
Possible honi soit que mal y pense fail on my part… we shall see…
actually the fail is at least partly mine. I should have put another comma after religious leaders to be grammatically correct per intent. Whoops.
You read the pause incorrectly.
oppressive dictators = religious leaders (coughs showing a “accidental” slip)
Those that don’t think it’s ever right to shoot someone was pointing back to: those of us that are vehemently against oppressive dictators/religious leaders.
Not to beat a dead horse, because it’s rarely satisfying when they don’t fight back, but if you’d written it this way:
.
of course… those of us that are vehemently against the oppressive dictators (*cough cough* ahem, religious leaders), tend to be the types that also don’t think it’s ever right to shoot someone.
.
It might have been more clear.
quite true. Just admitted so above (though just with an extra comma). Cheers!
I think you misread. Gamble’s saying that free-thinkin’ liberal types aren’t gun toting crazies. Seems it’s always the fundamentalists of whatever flavor that go around shooting people. (That’s what I got, anyway.)
Indeed… it’s hard to ‘bemused tolerance’ someone to death…
But they certainly do try Really, Really hard at times…
I even worked up to a *tsk, tsk* once, but there was alcohol
involved…
you MONSTER!
We should give her punishment by excessive glaring and possibly tickling…
teeeeeeeeeekull!
teekullteekullteekull!
But… you just KNOW she rolled her eyes in a
slightly exasperated fashion as she tsked!
Fine, I tickle and you spank, at the same time!!!
*goggles at “tickle and spank”*
It’s like patting your head and rubbing your belly at the same time…
But with two profession perverts handling the patting and rubbing for you…
There was alcohol involved. My attorney will
argue that there is no way to estimate what
percent of the eyeroll was lack of coordination.
She will tie the case up for weeks with expert
testimony…
Then she will be tickled and spanked for the usual rates I charge her…
Dammit, DWN, quit tickling and spanking my
attorneys! This is the third one I’ve been
through!
(Come to think of it, I should have been
suspicious when she volunteered to work
pro bono…)
Pfft, like I can afford to turn down good business with round female behinds in THIS economy…
Why, if I were alive, I’d… Then I’d…
Crap, I bet you’re not even afraid of chain
rattling.
Wait! I know! I’ll become reincarnated, then
hire a *clown* attorney!
Bwahahaha!
If it is a guy in make up, I will just laugh as you scream in fear of your own lawyer. If it is a chic, I can find a way to have fun. Even clown girls need love.
Two words: Rats!
STOPIT STOPIT STOPIT!!!
I’ll change!! I’ll reform!! Just STOP with the
tick…I can’t even write the word…
*dies*
Bwahahahaa!!!
*haunts*
*uses evil rituals to bind the spirit of Rhorho into a lifelike and amply proportioned sex doll. Then sells the doll to Uncle Fester*
Yes, I play too much D&D…
Hey, don’t I get to roll some expensive,
multi-faceted die, or something?
No, you’re a disembodied spirit without any stats. Sucks to be you. Besides, you wouldn’t know what saving throw to roll to begin with even if you had a save to roll.
*counts money from transaction*
*checks rule book*
Hey, it says here that I don’t have to play
your game. It’s only for screwy social
misfits who feel the need to escape their
miserable existences. Heck, I’ve got chains
to rattle, walls to walk through, and blood
stains to leave on carpet. They even have
dental!!!
*flies away, as DWN counts the the
Zimbabwean bills Unc gave him*
Says the disembodied spirit which another escape from reality since ghosts technically shouldn’t exist. *binds spirit with another ritual and sells to MegaBob*
*checks money. is satisfied with American Legal Tender for now*
*corrects posts because Rhorho rocks and Megabob gets the ghost of Coulter*
*whispers to DWN where she hid the
original money from Unc, leaving it to his
conscience whether to return it*
Exactly!
Musicmom vs. archenemy:
“Wait! Hold still while I give you my DISAPPOINTED look!”
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! Curse you musicmom! I’ll get you next time!!!!!
Nope. I’ve got eyes in the back of my head! Mwaahahahahahaaaa!
There are plenty of liberals packing heat, in America anyway. We’d be fools not to, with all the “lock & load” bile being wharrgarbl’d on the conservative talk sites.
I guess I don’t understand why anyone wouldn’t be pro-gun. Guns don’t kill people, criminals with guns kill people. How many murders are committed with legally registered firearms? I would guess very few. So making them illegal simply prevents law abiding citizens from owning guns, the criminals will all still have them. Drugs are illegal, and they’re plenty easy to get.
Guns don’t kill people, criminals with guns kill people.
Oversimplify much? Police, troops, hunters (a la Cheney) and
home defenders shoot people, and some of those people die.
I agree with the 2nd Amendment, but agree with rational limits
being put into place. The NRA’s slippery slope arguments are
Theatre of the Absurd at its finest.
4 words: Pissing. In. The. Wind.
Debating with that kind of sound bite retard is like trying to pile gravy with a pitchfork… futile and frustrating in equal measure…
Mmmmmmm, now I want gravy.
And now I do, too. And all I have is this stupid organic poptart.
Also, @Fester, the phrase I use that’s comparable is “trying to nail Jell-o to the wall.”
Great, now I want gravy AND jello. Um, ew.
organic poptart? wrong. on waaay too many levels. and it is actually possible to nail jell-o to a wall (thank you 9th grade science) but you have to use the “jigglers” directions, which makes the jell-o a little harder.
Well, they’re minimally better tasting than the regular poptarts and one of the few breakfast items I can stick in my purse without disaster.
i suppose a sausage and egg biscuit could get rather messy in a purse…
@Diss: I’ve discovered South Beach Diet Breakfast Bars. Normally I hate breakfast bars but these are delicious, espcially the peanut butter and the maple nut. They also have protein in them, so they keep me going until lunchtime.
@Jane: So they don’t taste diet-y, then? A lot of that stuff tastes like styrofoam packing peanuts. I will have to try! Thanks.
Not diety at all, and believe me, I have a chronically late mother, so as a child I’ve tried every on the go breakfast substitute known to mankind (Carnation instant breakfast anyone?) so I know of what I speak!
@Saint: My mother made orange Jell-O using
Orange Crush instead of water. The flavor
was intense. What little carbonation was left
appeared as a slight haze on the top, but
didn’t taste different. I’m thinking the same
thing would work with cherry or grape fla-
vors, or a combination. Anyway, yum!
over the non-denominational winter holidays we made cherry jell-o with pomegranate 7-up. it was very much good.
A friend of mine tried to make jelly. She later claimed that its solidity and chewiness was because “there wasn’t enough room in the jug to put much water in.”
bleich.
I agree with you. I’m not saying there shouldn’t be limitations, but an all out gun ban is just silly. Look at DC.
You would guess… wonderful… when you have some facts, I’d suggest you come back and enlighten us…
From my reading of the stats in 1999, most gun crime was commited with stolen legally registered guns… so, I’d say if you can’t keep the damn thing safe, you don’t deserve it.
And the criminals get guns where? Hmm? retard.
I’m sorry Fester. I’m just not the intellectual powerhouse that you are. I guess not all of us simpletons can be all-knowing beings. I don’t know where they get them, I’m not a criminal.
-
If I had to make an educated guess, I would assume they get them the same place drugs come from, they’re either stolen, shipped in from overseas, purchased from military surplus (the AK’s leftover from the Cold War) or they will be manufactured illegally.
My take on it is, the type of people to kill people are also likely the type to illegally own/manufacture guns, so the “bad guys” are going to be armed, regardless. Might as well let people defend themselves.
Geez, that sounded like I meant “hand everyone a gun” – not what I meant. I’m saying I don’t think making guns illegal will fix the problem.
The answer was in the question, you cretin… but let me spell it out
.
THEY. STEAL. THEM. FROM. PEOPLE. WHO. SHOULDN’T. BE. ALLOWED. PAPER. SCISSORS.
-
85% (from memory) of guns, in the possession of criminal, that were found t have been used in the commission of a crime were found to have been ‘lost’ and not reported or ’stolen’ (1999 figures)
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I have no problem with folks owning guns, but when they just leave them around to get stolen by drugged up scumbags, well, excuse me for thinking that gun ownership is a privilege, not a god given right (it were a god given right, it’d be in Deuteronomy)
It IS in Deuteronomy. Haven’ you seen The Ten Commandments with Charlton Heston? If that’s not a God-given right to bear arms, I’m not sure what is
Ok, I was just looking for a picture, but this article is pretty funny.
[link]
Excerpt:
Commonly the right to bear arms is confused with the God-given right of every red-blooded American to shoot people. That right however requires no legal justification to begin with since anyone giving gun-toting conservatives crap, will simply get shot.
“I bring you these fifteen *crash* Ten! Ten commandments!…
(gotta love Mel Brooks)
here’s another good fact:
the only legally owned fully automatic weapon ever used in a crime was owned by a police officer.
Here’s another good fact:
Fully automatic weapons have been restricted in the United States since the National Firearms Act of 1934, available only to police, military personnel, and private individuals who manage to obtain permission from the US Treasury Dept, pass an extensive background check, fully register the firearm and continually update the owner’s address and location of the firearm and pay a $200 transfer tax. Some states require state permission as well. The US Treasury Dept. lists only a few hundred thousand lawfully owned fully automatic weapons. The bulk of these are owned and used in the motion picture industry.
*crickets*
Quelle surprise…
*badmintons*
*squashes*
*croquets*
Deep fried potato in bread crumbs?
*water polos*
I would assume that a criminal with intention to kill somebody would find a weapon the same way that a junkie finds their fix. Any means necessary.
A gun ban merely makes all gun owners criminals. Whine and piss all you want but it doesn’t stop that simple fact. Wishing and making things illegal doesn’t make them go away. You defend legalized drugs with the same ideals that gun ownership is defended. If you are going to troll and name call, at least be consistent with the things you are against.
No, I’m against cretins who let their legally held weaponry fall into criminal hands,
So, screw you, gothboy.
I love it when you talk dirty, old man.
Point taken and I withdraw my statement.
Problem is, ya know I love ya in sordid, unmanly ways…
Of course, and I love you in godless and parka wearing ways that would make Ron Jeremy think himself a virgin again.
and recoil in horror while muttering ‘There is no God!’
You are such a sweet talker.
I thought it was an icy blast of realism…
That costs extra…
I guess I don’t understand why anyone wouldn’t be pro-gun.
Hm. Culture again, maybe. I don’t see why anyone would be pro-gun. The (apparently most common) American stance on fire-arms is a mystery to me. :p
How many murders are committed with legally registered firearms? I would guess very few.
Still I think plenty of people die from bullets coming from legal registered firearms every year?
Oh, the “How many…” was a quote. Odd that the <i> tag didn’t “take”. Maybe I didn’t put it in there. :p
I live in a rural area. All I’m trying to say is that there’s a big difference between a farmer with a gun that he uses for hunting, and as a tool to support his livlihood, and a handgun owner living in downtown chicago.
-
At the same time, I guess I have enough mistrust for the government that I don’t think disarming the public is the best solution.
That I agree with, but your average farmer knows how to look after a gun since it’s part of his day to day work. It’s kept working, clean and safe.
Some ass in Chicago, who maybe had two days of gun safety training may not see his gun for a year…
Yes. I agree with the “gun as tool”. I’d almost be inclined to say that anyone who works with animals on a lrger scale should be required to own a gun – and be trained in using it – or some other means of fast killing of an animal in need to stop living. :p
.
I guess the difference here is pretty much the same as the abortion thing with “pro-life”/”pro-choice”. I am certainly not pro-gun, in the same way that I am not pro-abortion.
.
… and I don’t see how distrust of the government is related to people having guns.
I’m pretty much ‘live and let live’… people want an
abortion or need one… fine by me. I’ve sat shiva with
friends on that one, at times when their families turned
their face away, and I’m not going to judge. (and no,
I’m not playing t he hero, there are some trails
no-one should have to ride alone… the Gethsemane
trail being the darkest and worst trail of all)
If you want a gun, then look after the damned thing
and get trained. I don’t want a drugged up punk, with
YOUR gun in my lounge. Nor do I want to live next to
an untrained person shooting wildly at 3 am at some
drugged up punk, since I don’t want a 38 in spine…
Yeah … I can’t carry on any extended similish thing between guns and abortions, all I was after was the wording “pro-gun”, which indicates wanting there to be more guns out there, much the same way that pro-abortion would mean trying to get more of those.
.
But yeah. Guns, where they are needed and are handled correctly are not something I object to. I might have more restrictive views on “needed” and “correctly” than those who would possibly label themselves “pro-gun”.
since there are parts of the US that, if it was any other country, the UN would be on the streets, I’d say there was a need for a decent armed, and trained militia…
“as a tool to support his livlihood,”
At this point, in America, there are very few places left where someone could live off the land by hunting, and farmers are not living in those places.
“At the same time, I guess I have enough mistrust for the government that I don’t think disarming the public is the best solution.”
Good luck fighting a modern military using small arms.
I believe in regulated gun ownership: one should be allowed access to most firearms, but should be required to buy a permit, and list all the weapons one owns. It just doesn’t make sense to me that I need a permit to drive a car, but not to own a pistol.
Just to answer the part about a farmer not needing a gun in order to upport his livelihood…….I take it you’ve never had to watch a calf being slaughtered by a cougar, fought coyotes off your chickens, or shot packs of dogs roaming the fields in order to kill what they may? Just because the farmer doesn’t need the gun in order to provide food for his family doesn’t mean he doesn’t need the gun at all to protect himself and his livestock. Also, if you’re being charged by an angry bull (I’ve seen them go from licking sugar cubes out of your hand to wild rampage in less than 5 seconds), then having a handgun on you is a lifesaver. Sometimes literally.
to stop a bull you’d need something of a hand cannon…
BTW, that wasn’t a contradiction, it was an argument for farmers needing some reasonably heavy ordnance…
i can see the movie now… Dirty Harry Hayseed..
Which reminds me, somewhat on topic, I heard a guy on the radio while I was working last night going on about how if that lady in Connecticut
with the psychotic chimp had owned a gun, she could have shot
the chimp before police got there and possibly minimized the damage…..now, as you are all aware I’m entirely in favor of people having the right to own guns (although I think it’s a right that comes with the inherent responsibility to secure
your firearms and use them responsibly, including range practice) but my first thought was, “Please…that nutjob would be entirely likely to accidentally
shoot her friend instead.” People say some stupid, stupid things.
Didn’t she try stabbing the chimp before the cops got there? I love how the 911 responder was all like, “Your chimp is attacking your friend? Riiiiiiiight.”
Yeah, I think so, she may have also tried hitting it with something….and I have to admit I have some sympathy for the 911 operator! Who expects a freakin’ chimp attack in suburban Connecticut?
Lesson to be learned, I think, is that if your friend calls and needs help with her chimp, say no firmly and suggest she contact Animal Control.
I don’t blame the 911 operator either, my humor stems from imagining what was going through his/her head when he took the call!
Someone had a chimp as a pet?
They do have to deal with some wackyassed stuff in between
actual emergencies…[link] to a website that has posted both
actual emergency calls and bizarre ones. Like the lady that
calls 911 because Burger King messed up her order in the
drivethrough.
@ Danbala: Yes, apparently she’d had it for years and it got out of control one day and she called her friend (who I’m guessing is NOT her friend anymore) to come help her round him up and the chimp attacked her, pretty much ripped her face off (*puke*) and nearly killed her before the police showed up and shot it. [link]
@Danbala
Yeah, she treated it like it was her son and it went (pardon the pun) apesh*t and attacked her friend one day. I think her friend is in critical condition and the cops ended up shooting the chimp. It spawned this controversy over the appropriateness of keeping wild animals, even ones that are our evolutionary cousins, as pets when they are, in fact, not.
[link] with more details about the attack.
Insane. Then I’d be inclined to think the individual in all that who’d been most in need of a firearm is the chimp.
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I just found an article saying the owner’d fed it xanax too. Jebus. Too bad it was a – probably – more innocent visitor who got to bear the brunt of the result. (My normally rather good supply of patience and sympathy tends to be very, very small when it comes to people treating animals stupidly.)
Ah yes, that article.
*types slowly*
@Danbala: Yes. A woman had a 91 kg
chimpanzee as a pet. The chimp ate at the
table and drank wine from stemware, even.
For no reason that the owner has disclosed,
the chimp viciously attacked the woman’s
friend. The victim is in dire shape, despite
the owner’s efforts to stop the attack with
a butcher knife, among other things.
[LINK] One of the latest articles re chimp.
Ah, sorry again – the article I’d found was
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29227429/
arrgh! Refresh, rho, refresh!!
rhorho:
You’re not alone in needing that reminder, at least.
Thank you–You are too kind!
@Rho: I heard that the woman claimed her friend had changed her haircut and that might be the reason, because the chimp didn’t recognize her, or something ridiculous like that. I’m actually surprised we haven’t had a lol on the subject complete with TOO SOON caretrolls.
@Jane: Now that you’ve said it…
Chimp attacks aren’t pretty.
[LINK] to a disturbing photo and even more
disturbing article about another chimp attack
All right, Jane and Rho…I know it’s TOOOOOO SOOOOOOON!!1!!11, but now that you mention it, I just couldn’t resist making this LOL…[link]
**********STATUS UPDATE************
Diss continues to ROCK!
Heh, thanks! Like I said, if that made the front? It would be Caretrollpalooza 2009…
Man, I haven’t laughed that hard since Caretrollpalooza ‘08! Good times, my friend, good times.
not to rain on your parade here mark, but aren’t the insurgents in iraq and afghanistan fighting off a modern army with mostly small arms?
Mark, Link in the name as to the best use of small arms
Gun Deaths – International Comparisons
Gun deaths per 100,000 population (for the year indicated):
Homicide Suicide Other (inc Accident)
USA (2001) 3.98 5.92 0.36
Italy (1997) 0.81 1.1 0.07
Switzerland (1998) 0.50 5.8 0.10
Canada (2002) 0.4 2.0 0.04
Finland (2003) 0.35 4.45 0.10
Australia (2001) 0.24 1.34 0.10
France (2001) 0.21 3.4 0.49
England/Wales (2002) 0.15 0.2 0.03
Scotland (2002) 0.06 0.2 0.02
Japan (2002) 0.02 0.04 0
that didnt work out quite as i had wished,, there are supposed to be 3 colums the first is murder, second is suicide and the third is other? in many countries its very difficult to obtain a firearm legally, probably not so much illegally, but the punishment for illegally possessing a weapon is pretty stiff. im not sure if its accessibility to guns is the cause, or the overall American me first attitude is at fault. i think its absurd that we should even have to debate whether we need to carry guns anywhere, i think its a comment on the overall immaturity of our species. that being said i am eventually going to get my concealed weapons permit.
I have to ask, was it a deliberate choice on your part to only include countries with lower rates than the U.S.?
Brazil (1993) 10.58 firearm homicides per 100,000
Guatemala (2000) 18.05
Northern Ireland (1994) 5.24
Thailand (2002) 33.00 (!)
hell, give EVERYONE a gun. good guys, bad guys, everyone, and make it legal to use them indiscriminately. Then, when people are losing their tempers, road raging, or getting pissed off because they asked for EXTRA GODDAMN FOAM on their half-caf venti double coffee something-or-other, they’ll just shoot the other person. that is, if the other person doesn’t get to their gun first. It will solve so many problems. The homeless rate will go down, unemployment will go down, world hunger will disappear. It’s natural selection at high speed. just don’t come to my house, I’ve got a .50 cal on a tripod in my living room window that would just love to say “hi”. *
*disclaimer: the previous statement was meant to be an exercise in sarcasm, so if you are offended, cry me a river, build a bridge, and get over it.
Not remotely offended.
There are certainly no legitimate reasons for gun ownership. The best solution is to punish all gun owners for the misdeeds of a few irresponsible folks. Next we should make knives, axes, tire irons, and baseball bats illegal, because they can be used to kill people as well.
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People are certainly not the problem, the weapons are the problem. Get rid of weapons and nobody will ever get hurt again!
Steve, don’t forget rocks, or we’ll just have a rash of people bashing each other in the head with rocks.
Good catch diss! Maybe we should add pointy sticks to the list just for good measure?
I’ve got a friend who thinks more guns would make crime go away, and make us all safer. To which I respond: “You know where there’s an automatic rifle in every home? Iraq! Afghanistan! Somalia! How’s that universal arming working there?”
You occasionally make a few good points. That wasn’t one of them
Diss just digs a cheese hole 9/10 so I’m not wasting my time directing my comment there…So…
Handy hint… if you’re going to follow up a good piece of sarcasm, make sure it’s as good if not better, or at least *TRY* to be funny, rather than simply a prick.
That was almost a speech from Dirty Harry…
I thought it was more a choice of in other respects rather similar countries. The US is s’posedly a very Western, very civilised country, and all that.
LOL, nice of you to consider us civilized, but I’m not sure that I would…Good reasoning, though.
s’posedly
;p
Anyway, I think you understood what I meant.
OK let’s just look at that list
so, the US record for gun related homicides per 10000 is ok because it’s beaten by three third world hells and a terrorist hotspot?
I’m not saying it’s ok; I was asking whether the statistics presented were intended to imply that the US had the highest rate worldwide when we clearly don’t.
We have a phenomenally violent society; I’m not about to deny that…
Basically, you have to go to third world hell holes or places that are riddled with terrorists…
That’s just bad
And, again, I’m not arguing that it’s not bad. It IS bad (although like most places, especially larger places, it’s not equally bad all over).
And to add, I’m pretty sure there’s areas in the city I live in that would put the third world hellholes to shame…
there isn’t much of a correlation between gun ownership and crime. look at switzerland, almost no crime and everyone there owns guns…
and they’re all trained. you don’t have the cert, you don’t get the gun.
You let the training lapse, they take the gun off you.
It’s a tool, not a penis extension…
*nods and keeps quiet about scimitar upstairs by bedstand*
*wonders whether she should hide the odd-
shaped vase*
To be clear, I think ILLEGALLY posessing a firearm should be a very serious felony, and should come with extremely stiff monetary penalty, as well as a long prison term. The only reason to have an illegal gun is to commit a violent crime. Lock them up forever for all I care.
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Just don’t ask me to hand my guns to Uncle Sam. (well, the guns that I don’t currently own, but have the right to bear if I so choose)
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Even if we took the guns away, don’t you suppose people might just start blowing each other up with car bombs, IED’s etc.?
You spoiled that by
1) suddenly sounding like Yosemite Sam
2) burbling off into hyperbole…
catholics don’t like guns? what about the ira?
MUCH funnier than the last one (gag.) I like it.
If everyone loves Obama, why does he need the Secret Service?
As far as I know, Christians see the Pope as the head of their church, not even as a saint. Do your homework. And as for liberals not being the violent type? I’m sure Stalin agrees with you.
lol a good point, but actually, this is the newer pope-mobile. think about it. I’m sure that since the Kennedy assassination Presidents are less likely to be seen in convertibles (i dont know the numbers, but i’d assume they’d be low.), and the same is with the popes after someone tried to kill one. my history teacher was there 1 year before the shooting, standing just where the shooter stood, and remembers telling his friend “from here you’d have a perfect shot” as a joke, of course. mild mannered history teachers dont go on killing sprees, esp. of kindly old men (say what you will, the last pope was a genuinely good guy.)
Christians don’t really give a damn about the Pope. Catholics do, and although Catholicism and Christianity are closely related ( and both are forms of Judaism if you really thing about it) They are not quite interchangeable. As far as Obama needing the Secret Service, even if he was the Messiah, greatest thing since sliced bread, the best thing in the Oval Office since Clinton implemented ” Free BJ Fridays” ( and I’m not saying he is ), there would still be SOMEONE who didn’t like him, who got a wild hair up his ass to take a shot. It’s one of the downsides of being a public figure. Politicians and religious leaders have it the worst, but even lesser celebrities have been known to be targeted by someone for no sane reason.
Um, Catholics are Christians.
Christians = One who professes belief in Jesus as Christ or follows the religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus.
Catholics are a denomination of Christianity. Just like Orthodox and Protestants and all the branches of Protestants plus the ironic “non-denominationals.”
Catholic =/= Christian, just like Christian =/= Catholic.
Same Jesus chap in charge… same monstrous egos that think that
if there is a creator God he’d be SO damned interested in an over
developed, chromosomalyl challenged, chimp… same idea that if
there is a heaven, there’s only their way in – they’re Christian…
Christians can be Catholic or Protestant… Catholics still most certainly count as Christians…
i apologize, I was referring to “Protestant” Christians. I am fully aware that Catholicism is a form of Christianity. They are both offshoots of Judaism, and all of them share beliefs from several “pagan” cultures that came before them. Here’s one I bet you didn’t know, Vaudun (Voodoo) is a form of Catholicism.
No matter what religion you subscribe to, I’m not only going to Hell, I’m driving the bus. Unless you’re Jewish, they don’t believe in Hell. I think they just go to Florida…
It really amounts to the same place anyway.
florida is more humid than hell.
So is MS during the summer. No wonder I was a stick figure when I lived down there. Oh and I was barely a teenager, that might have factored too.
crooked letter crooked letter i? why on earth would anyone ever live there?!
It actually wasn’t that bad, but I lived in Northern MS and never ventured near the coast. I actually have fond memories down there. Was very pleasant.
Isn’t Catholicism a subset of Christianity?
For a long time it was the only set of Christianity. A nasty tendency to kill anyone who didn’t agree…
BTW, have you seen they’re reintroducing indulgences? That’s all we need to add to the chaos, another bloody reformation…
Did God tell them to do so? I’m confused as to how mere humans can change the rules of a religion on a whim? Are confessions down in the ratings? Maybe they need a boost to drive membership.
Apparently they never ‘did away’ with them, but they’re doing a marketing drive on them.
and all religious rules are a whim… it’s why they exegete so much…
I think the new Popemobile has email. The old one just had a fax.
“I’m confused as to how mere humans can change the rules of a religion on a whim?”
Well, that’s part of the wonders of Catholicism: whenever the Pope speaks ex cathedra, he is automatically right, with no room for argument, even if another pope said something different some other time!
The funniest part of that, to me, is that it wasn’t the case until about 125 years ago (sorry, I’m not expert enough to know exactly). So, one day, the pope could be wrong, and the next he was infallible. I bet that sure helped when picking up women!
Infallibility was a response to German Biblical Scholarship in
the 1880s. Basically, the RCC tried to do what the Germans
were doing in sola scriptura type critical study. They found
they started haemorrhaging clergy to the protestant sects, or
out of the church altogether.
Interestingly, the way the Germans stopped losing clergy was
by a piece of logical back flippery that would make the RCC
proud to have thought of, bascially, they developed an inner
and outer teaching, such that the ‘faith’ based stuff was for
the crowds and the more stupid clergy, but the ones with
above average comprehension skills we taught that the form
is more important than ‘literalism’… which really flew back to
what the RCC had been doing since its inception with dogma.
Oh, dear. Do you have any link to more reading about that? I seem to fail at finding a good source for vaticanny news. :/
I’d suggest ‘The Vicars of Christ’ by Peter De Rosa as a good start.
Well they consider themselves the ‘mother church’.
Yo, Wormfood,
Strawman much?
.
Not everyone loves Obama. I know, tough to believe, but it’s true. I can even point you to website where they are absolutely convinced that he is the actual, the real, in the flesh anti-christ. Kid you not.
.
Even if everyone did love Obama, how is that supposed to be on the same level as an all knowing, all present, all powerful and yes, all eating god?
.
I don’t know to whom you’re addressing the ‘pope isn’t a saint’ remark. I just did a quick search and can’t find where anyone claimed he was. What I said, in case your comment was to me, was that he was supposed to be god’s representative on Earth. That’s the best I can remember it from my 12 years as a catholic, which ended more than 35 years ago, so you’ll have to forgive me (father for I have sinned) if I got it wrong.
In support of ACSIS’ post – Great chunks of catholics not taking the pope that seriously…
The Pope only became infallible in the 1800s, and then when speaking Ex-Cathedra.
It’s pretty clear John XXIII was speaking Ex-Cathedra when he instituted Vatican II, yet there are a vast number of clerics and Catholic sects who don’t think he was infallible there
Even Catholics think their church talks bollocks when it doesn’t support their personal dislikes (one thing about pre-Vatican II people, they’re xcreaming anti-semites)
Stalin was a liberal? LMFAO.
Time for a reality check, kid. You have a very strange world going on inside your head.
yeah, you know, like all the other long-haired hippy pinko commie scum..
Yet another demonstration that there are, in fact, _nothing but_ atheists in foxholes.
…
They instituted the ‘popemobile’ after the attempted assassination of Pope John Paul II.
It really is called the popemobile.
This is just a bit too sacreligious.
Definition:
Sacrilege is the violation or injurious treatment of a sacred object. In a less proper sense, any transgression against the virtue of religion would be a sacrilege. It can come in the form of irreverence to sacred persons, places, and things. …
If something is true, yet sacrilegious, which wins out? Why?
… link in name
Did you mean to reply to me? I have no argument that they are not only Christians, but they were the first organized Christian church (which still exists), regardless of what others say.
.
I LMAO at all of the infighting that happens between all of the sects, and how easily Christians throw each other under the bus. Oh, if that person di that they were never a True Christian (TM thingy here).
.
None of the people within a sect can agree on what being a Christian really is. Why would we expect people from sect to sect to agree.
You can’t use the true christian TM as Landover baptist seems already to own that. Linked. Lovely little site to spoof all those “christians” (also bible-thumping neo-cons) who take themselves way too seriously. It’s somewhat “onion”esque.
sorry, meant to add
not a serious admonishment, in case you couldn’t tell.
I haven’t been to that site in long long time. I used to love reading the letters. Truly amazing people out there.
I was about to get pissed until I came back & saw you said it was a spoof. All I saw was “negroes getting uppity” and “unsaved unwelcome.” I’m glad I came back & looked at your post again. lol
…BUT they can’t really trademark that phrase, can they? Just seems like one wouldn’t be able to. But then again I heard Beyonce is trying to TM Sasha Fierce. What a maroon.
Man, I miss Bill Hicks.
One of the unpalatable facts of life I choose to ignore. In my reality, Bill is still out there on an eternal UFO tour…
*wipes eye* That’s just beautiful to think about… *sniff*
With George Carlin…
T_T
Awwwwwwwwww, I hope so!
JERRY: He’s a bubble boy.
GEORGE: A bubble boy?
JERRY: Yes. a bubble boy.
SUSAN: What’s a bubble boy?
JERRY: He lives in a bubble.
GEORGE: Boy!
I’ve figured it out! I know why he is in the glass box! He’s more valuable that way, and if you take him out of the package, he depreciates, and you’ll never get a good resale value! (don’t mine me, I’m kinda drugged up)
It’s hyperbaric… or perhaps the atmosphere of his home world…
What’s the going rate on ebay these days??
It’s never a lot… they often threw the old ones into the Tiber, after judging them apostate or heretic…
This John Paul II is $60 (at the “buy it now” price).
Why am I even moderately surprised that this exists?
Vestigial taste?
Nah, that can’t be it…Oh, well. He’s just lucky he didn’t live with my Barbie dolls when I was a kid. He’d have been defrocked in about two days…
Or wearing a boob tube and hot pants…
…while living in a bizarre threeway with GI Joe and Christie.
OMG, it’s a talking action figure! It really is there!
.
The box contains a warning that it has ’small parts’ on which you
could choke. Shouldn’t that warning be printed on all priests?
.
The box also says: ‘Not intended for children under 8 years of age.’ And that warning should be printed on all religion.
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Ok, let the ‘religion basher’ bashing begin….
If I may provide some fuel to the inevitable flames, little arsonist that I am?
I personally think that you can bash religion as long as you want – provided it’s within certain limits. So no calling for their blood, or installing vote-bots to slander their youtube videos, or anything like that.
You know, the sort of thing that many religious people are doing to atheists.
All these comments and no one mentions the fact that it’s Lexan, and not glass? Christ almighty.
that’s the thing I’ve come to hate about the comment section. no background info, where the picture came from or anything. it’s completely off topic all the time.
The lolcat comments are always gibberish translating into IT’S CUUUUUTE I CAN HAS ONE? I’ll occationally click on those comments to find someone complaining in english and that’s it.
Is he really shielded in a 2″ bubble?
If so, dang. O__O But not surprised…>___>
-enjoys watching people get offended- ^
“fear denies faith”
Pithy… you selling a tee shirt?
thanks, but the quote belongs to Games Workshop i guess
“Only those who are insane have the strength to prosper. Only those who prosper say what is truly sane”
*anger*
If I was a brand of condom, I’d be pissed about the RCC too…
*rimshot* Don’t forget to tip your waitress!
While wearing a condom…
The Popemobile: The original Batmobile.
The grappling hook cornering was hard on the ‘faithful’…
Lol this is my fav:
“If the Son of God got murdered by people, why should the pope be safe?”