RULES OF COMEDY
RULES OF COMEDY
When in doubt, even the first lady with go for the dick joke.
(Michelle Obama)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: heatherjlc
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President… Presidential… Presidential footlo~ng…
*hides from rotten tomatoes being flung*
*Rolls eyes*
*POP* Aw crap, whoever just rolled their eyes under my desk, I think I stepped on one…
And so will PK’ers
In bed…
With a spork…
Ouch!
*brings out the Chasing Spork*
You rang?
With a pitchfork, a gallon of mayonnaise, three geckos and a car battery.
(or is that just me?
)
Can we switch mayonnaise for chocolate mousse?
If the geckos don’t mind, why should I?
Naw, I’m not a fan of geckos.
Even bloody virginal ones?
.
Ok, you’re free to substitute the reptile of your choice, maybe a repub
oops, sorry about that…
OT
I’ve tried using the strikethrough tag twice now, and it’s not working up here, yet I’m quite sure I saw someone use it in the comments somewhere.
testingDon’t say that. She might choose Anne Coulter.
Brainbleach, quick! Emergency!
*Sham-wow at the ready*
sweet
I want a Snuggie made entirely of ShamWows. That would be sweet.
But…it would suck all the moisture out of your body, leaving you a dessicated corpse in minutes!
Now that’s a great new market.
.
Mummify your pets or loved ones in minutes. *
Mount them on the wall.
Use them as a coffee stand or a coat rack.
Always have them near-by.
*
-Please make sure your loved ones are deceased prior to using the Sham-wow to mummify them.
- The makers of Shaw wow assume no responsibility for the misuse of this product.
Would you put it past Vince to do that to you? Would you?
No worries, I’m pretty sure Ann isn’t a virgin, therefore her use as a sacrifice is out. I’m not saying I wouldn’t push her into a volcano, but that’d be purly for recreational purposes.
So your vacation with His Cruelty to his island fortress is still on then? I do wish he would keep me posted on these things. I just rounded up a batch of homeless people to shoot for his Russian Vacation. Now I have to let them go and find some virgins…
*runs*
*sighs and loads dartgun*
He wouldn’t be “His Cruelty” if he made things easy on you, now would he?
How very droll m’lady, but point well taken. I wouldn’t be an honorable dragon god if I didn’t know my place, despite the fact that I still think he cheated in that card game to get my service in the first place.
Nevertheless, your ladyship shall have her entertainment and he shall have his virgin sacrifices upon your arrival, if not sooner.
Question. Do those virgins have to be female? Or does
His Cruelty not discriminate…
Well he isn’t indulging in them so I would assume His Cruelty doesn’t care since they are volcano fodder anyway.
I’ve actually read a pretty humorous article from some journalist who claims to have had some sort of anger-induced, donkey-punching, tryst with Ann Coulter. If I could find it I’d post a link since just thinking about it made me lol.
wanna really know why his his ears stand away…?
First first couple where the mental image doesn’t
make ya wanna hurl!
She isn’t showing the length of Obama’s penis…..she is showing the length of HERS.
So? As long as they’re having fun, and not scaring the horses, doesn’t bother me!
Frau Blücher!
*whinnies in fear*
Oh, sweet mystery
Of life, at last I’ve found you…
Putting on the Ritz
OK, so that mixed
Two diff’rent parts of the film
But its still haiku!
Your departure ends
Thus the poems renew now
So I’m delighted
You do haiku too?
I knew I liked this place for
more than the macros.
Senryu you mean,
haiku is much more complex-
than five seven five
You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
Lighthearted posts, please …
I once wrote a pair
Of haikus, related, but
Willing to fuse — please
Don’t ask me how one
Limerick now replaces
The haikus in twos
*******
I once wrote a pair of haikus
Related, but willing to fuse
Please don’t ask me how
One limerick now
Replaces the haikus in twos
There once was a mi-er named Mark
Who thought of the strangest remark
A limerick, he said,
Was haikus instead!
Just in pairs, a la Noah’s ark.
Worst case of penis envy I’ve ever seen. tsk tsk.
Or Mrs. Clinton’s
Hee hee. All the rest of them in the “See All Captions” ARE either dick jokes or Subway jokes (with a finger football or two thrown in).
Okay, this is freaking me out … am I the only one whose homepage keeps blinking in and out with a different header? … must be changes a ‘comin!
I suggest fleeing with your sanity.
Too late!
I knew those penguins were shady characters…
Billy Madison? Can’t think of any other penguin reference …
There is a tshirt that says One by one, the penguins steal my sanity…
There’s the penguin in the ice cave in Fight Club.
Slide…
Exactly.
Seriously — click the “vote” page, and see if the header/footer changes.
Must. Lay. Off. ‘Shrooms ….
*thump thump thump*
FFWWWTTTT!
Is this thing on?
The Subway $5 Footlong would’ve been better.
No it wouldn’t have. You’re right, this one sucks, but it’s giving pk’ers what they want apparently.
OT
I must be the only person in the world to have not seen any of those commercials. The first time I was voting and saw 30 or 40 of those go by, I had to look it up to understand WTF anyone was talking about.
.
Of course, I also had to look up what nomnom meant when the first 3k of those went by…
Yeah it sucks, and that $5 footlong sucks even worse. Considering the look on her face I liked the Judith Warner reference, but apparently no one but me read that story. (link)
re: the article, hope is a powerful thing, even more so when it’s really needed.
Heh, no doubt. I wonder if they’ll compile the dreams into a book like they did with Clinton? (link) Probably not what with the information superhighway now a reality. But you can see why that reference would be funny now, what with the look on Michelle’s face, wondering why Judith wants to know how big
I must be the only person in the world to have not seen any of those commercials.
No. No, you’re not alone!
Nope, not alone!
Cool. I figured it was just me, and maybe some deaf and blind guy in a monastery in Tibet. I feel better, unless the two of you really are that deaf and blind guy.
That’s really, um, interesting!
Ack. Nesting fail!
Re: Judith Warner.
Oh – lol, yeah I thought so too. Especially since it was such a deja vous!
An “already you”? *confoozled*
*Déjà vu
She’s an ugly woman. She should go back to picking cotton.
When, exactly, does your racist self think she may have picked cotton, Massah?
Opinions are like a$$holes and you are one. Granted, she’s not my type of LADY, but then I can imagine your pretty damn lonely if your bar is that high.
I prefer
Opinions are like Tampons. Sooner or later evey bloody cnut has one…
Not true — some bloody cnuts have TSS and thus are forced to use pads.
Also true – some cruddy blokes have MBD and thus are forced to use
pads and helmets.
…and you should go back to picking your nose…jack@ss…please drop out of the human race…
wow.
please don’t breed.
Too late. S/he already did, with his/her first cousin.
I agree, she is ugly.
She’s no Jackie, but none have come close since.
Then again, she’s no Ladybird, either.
Strange to say, your mother thinks you are…
I think she’s beautiful. She’s not a model or a skinny twig with no ass, but there is something about her. I think it’s her style and “First Lady-ness”.
This is a REALLY bad pic, however. We all have them.
A perfect example is to go back and look at your school pictures. I can guarantee each and everyone of us have had bad pics taken.
a-ha-ha-ha-h!!
Maybe sho just studies to whistle!
Say what?!?! Can you translate that for the rest of us?