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…do swear in a solemn sort of way, to do that…President stuff…in a really…really good…fashion…
Moral: Always use notecards.
(President Barack Obama, Michelle Obama & Chief Justice John Roberts)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: ganwil
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Cheezburger Network Blog
PK does swear, in a solemn sort of way, to never let that guy live this down…
Still, tis better than the plane landing…
Cheers.
Salut!
hear hear!
Poor guy, 40 years of legal wonderfulness (people who disagree with this bit, yah, we know, save it), and he goes down in history as the guy who muffed Obama’s swearing-in. Let’s chip in a get him a ‘no ad-libs’ t-shirt.
It’s true: Bush said he picked Roberts because he has one of the finest
legal minds since Matlock.
Maaaaaaaaaat-looooooooooock!
Nothing wrong with mis-speaking
I do that all the time, yet everyone comes to me for advice… figures
Yes, it is okay to misspeak sometimes…UNLESS YOU’RE THE CHIEF JUSTICE OF THE UNITED STATES ADMINISTERING THE OATH OF OFFICE TO THE PRESIDENT! I mean, my god, did he not practice that morning? He’s an arrogant SOB just like the man who appointed him.
Legal…wonderfulness?
I can answer that in one word. Ledbetter.
The man’s a nebbish. He’s the scrawny little kid you’d never notice except that he tags along with the juvenile delinquents Scalia, Thomas and Alito. The only reason he has that job is that Bush knew the Democrats would filibuster Scalia’s nomination as CJ.
Amen to that!
“40 years of legal wonderfulness (people who disagree with this bit, yah, we know, save it), and he goes down in history as the guy who muffed Obama’s swearing-in.”
`
Proving, if there were any doubt, that the likelihood of making a colossal,
never-live-it-down fool of oneself is in direct proportion to the size of one’s audience.
do i?
Actually I think the moral would be “Don’t let a monkey make Supreme Court nominations.”
I think Rohn Joberts did a fine rob …
Honestly I thought it was Obama’s screw up. Once he started repeating what he had said too early and from there neither knew when to start speaking and when to stop. I think Obabma was just a bit too anxious and we got to see it in this instance.
To me, it seemed as if Obama was the one who knew the text and got confused when Roberts mixed it up. But either way, I consider that moment pretty personable for both. It gave the whole scene a nice human touch, showing that they are just people like you and me.
And it provided great stuff for conspiracy theorists. You know, they repeated the oath later, but without the bible *fg* Nevertheless, this caption is great
yeah it struck me as one of those times when, two people have learned their part, and listen for their cues, but when one makes a mistake both struggle.
also, ‘he didn’t swear on the bible is he president now D:’ was my favorite little…tidbit. I didn’t know that the religious texts actually made it true, I always thought it was just a ceremonial thing.
They don’t. It’s a tradition; there’s absolutely nothing stating that a President has to be sworn in on the Bible. They could be sworn in on “My Big Boy Potty” as far as legalities are concerned.
Good dinner party ice breaker: What book would you be sworn in by?
Me: Steal This Book, I think.
Oxford dictionary.
For President?
A bound copy of the Constitution Of The United States.
Much more apropos!
You betcha.
U.S. ConstitutionSarah’s Book of Fun Powers!!!Or maybe I’d choose Sylvia Plath’s “Georgie”:
There’s a stake in your fat black heart
And the villagers never liked you.
They are dancing and stamping on you.
They always knew it was you.
Georgie, Georgie, you bastard, I’m through.
I would have chosen HOWL but I think you trumped me with Georgie!
Oh, NICE!
Stardrake, you win this thread. Kudos!
(Note to self: do not offer to hold the *SEVEN VOLUMES* of the OED for Dean’s swearing in.)
Otherwise I approve.
Seven? Must be the abridged or miniaturized volumes with the magnifying glass. Last time I checked, the full OED was 24 volumes!
I was being nice.
Would Have To Be very hungry caterpillar
ooooooo…or how about “Where the Wild Things Are”?
Complete Hitchhiker’s Guide
“On the Origin of Species” by Charles Darwin, of course! That’s a great question for the profile pages in any netcommunity
I’d say Catch-22, probably.
Dreams from my Father by B.H. Obama
(I wonder if *That One* will make it into the GWB Library…)
“There’s A Monster At The End Of This Book”, by Grover
“The Giving Tree.”
*Quick search of office for most obscure & ridiculous book title, realises that they’re all packed in fifty-five crates*
Basics of Aviation Powerplant Maintenance”; Bent & McKinley
Hey! It’s not obscure, it’s Shel Silverstein!
[LINK behind name]
M’apologies, Lit – I wasn’t swinging at “The Giving Tree” (although it’s certainly not a familiar book in my neck o’ the woods). I was looking around to try and find an obscure and swear-worthy book, at the very least to shift along the thread. Probably a fail on my part… I was going to flag Grey’s Anatomy, but I thought that would get misread…
Could always swear on a box set of West Wing…
What about some dusty, obscure Mason text?
At least it would keep the conspiracy theorists
occupied. They seem restless lately…
Oops! *Masonic
No worries, mate.
I really appreciate the self-sacrificing moral in that tale; I’d personally swear on a book that specifically defines the nature of what it’s like to be a great president, no matter what party — give of yourself selflessly until you’re got nothing left to give, yet never resent those who have taken what you have to offer. It’s what public service is all about.
Or maybe I’m reading too much into it. Who knows
@Lteral: For “reading too much into it,” how
about Le Petit Prince (French version,
of course)?
I just finished reading your link – people really took that book far more seriously that I’d have expected [Link back]…
I might see if I can hunt down a copy for my kids; they mainly get Kipling and Iggle-bloody-piggle from me…
O.M.G.
I haven’t read that since I was six!
Thank you so much! I have to go find that for a reread.
I *do* remember he has his own planet upon which he travels, a scene with a “mind’s eye” drawing, and what happened at the end (I cried. I was six, but I’ll probably cry again, anyway).
I’m going to stop at B&N and get this for my 11-year-old.
I just gave her “A Wrinkle in Time,” [LINK] and I’m going to re-read it, as well.
Thank you again!
Happy to jar your memory, and thank you
for reminding me of A Wrinkle in Time.
That was one of my “big girl” books–LOL!
There’s some things that we shouldn’t ever stop giving our kids.
Agreed, OhMyGoodness.
Unfortunately, my teenage son has inherited my propensity for trashy, pulp-fictionesque horror novels and thus I am constantly searching for my Stephen Kings and Deen Koontzes.
Don’t get me wrong, though, the kid quotes from Animal Farm and 1984 when he thinks I’m a little totalitarian in my dictates or that I am favaoring his sibs.
-
“All animals are equal, mother, but some are more equal than others, right?”
“Don’t forget, (sister), Napoleon is ALWAYS right.”
And my personal favorite.
“Yes, mother, I know why I’m in trouble. The object of torture is torture, and The object of power is power. I get it.”
ACK!
* Dean
@Literal: I’m glad that’s *your* kid. In the
face of such retorts, I would be too proud
and giggling too much to be an effective
disciplinarian…
@rhorho
I know! I have a lot of gas from swallowing my laughter. I can’t say anything about it, either, as I am the one who provided him with the literature in the first place! Talk about using your words against you … sheesh!
@Literal: Count your blessings: At least he’s
not using the Stephen King on you…
@rhoho
No joke, otherwise there’d be therapy, and lots of it.
@rhorho
Gotta give you an lol here:
Just walked in the door from work, (had an academic fair this morning and was yapping with y’all earlier while writing letters of rec for students).
Brought Pizza. Noticed chores didn’t get done, and started in on responsibilities, the nature of aforementioned, etc.
The tween bats her eyelashes, looks chagrined, and says “We love you Mommie Dearest! Please don’t hit us with those wire hangers, Mommie dearest!”
Yeah, discipline in my house makes me shake my head in shame.
Note: chores are getting done as I type this. No chores, no pizza. The tantalizing scent proves to be quite an incentive, indeed.
Behavior Modification, FTW!!
Thought you’d like that. I introduce them to classic literature and film, they use it to keep me in “line” and make me shake my head.
Best thing I’ve ever done, my lil’uns. They make me laugh, make me think, and make proud. I get compliments all the time regarding their demeanor in public venues (school, community and volunteer activities, church, etc.) I will reveal to all that they do attend a house of organized religion; even the ones in college come home for Christmas and Easter services. Please rest assured I’m not a religion crammer, they just appreciate it for the prospect in something beyond themselves. The irony is they attend with their father, as I am agnostic.
They’re good people, rho. Hope you have the same joy in your life.
*make me proud
Oops.
Oh hells. I didn’t mean that to sound as preachy as it came across.
Apologies.
And now, to make amends, Dick Cheney shot:
-
“I’m surprised Dick Cheney loves to hunt so much. The five times the government tried to give him a gun, he got a deferment.” –Jay Leno
@Literal: *sigh* Why are there no guys like that around here? The ones at my school are horribly rednecky. Your son sounds like fun, at least.
@Literal: You’re a great mom, and it shows!
That didn’t happen overnight, did it?
Thanks for the Jay Leno funny! I hadn’t heard
that one.
@Kuromisa
He’s a riot, actually. He got busted at school for wearing shirts that proclaimed “My Pen Is Mightier,” and, self-designed, a pic of a grain bag that said “Hey, why are you looking at my sack?” And I agree it’s his right to design and wear said attire.
But, alas, he is a farmboy, and, as such, is defined in a box as a redneck. He loves driving tractor and combine, but also loves challenging preconceived notions of who he actually *should* be. Outside the box he prefers actual literary challenges; on the surface you’d see him driving the pick-up with the “wide load” racks and cuss him for slowing you down; the reason he is doing so is he is flagging equipment for his father while reading Steinbeck’s “The Pearl.”
I know, I’ve caught him in the process of pissing off all the traffic behind him while he grins, drives 10 mph, and enjoys the classics. Yep, I’m lucky.
@rhorho
Thank you, yet again. I really appreciate your welcoming manner. This is an interesting medium, and I am very much enjoying interacting with you all. However, Uncle Fester is a bit of an enigma …
@Literal: Don’t sweat Unc. He’s an acquired
taste. If you can imagine Rowan Atkinson’s
Black Adder, Andy Kaufman and Christopher
Hitchins rolled into one, with a dash of creepy
and a pinch of kookie, you are headed in the
right direction.
It wouldn’t hurt to add some Malcolm
McDowell in there, either…
Oh, yes. Most importantly, he likes [LINK].
@Rho – I’ve been told ‘House, M.D.’ has a resemblance too…
Other than the fact I’m played by an Englishman, I’m nothing like as sunny and likeable as Gregory House….
Or is it the nagging feeling (that at least I can’t shake off), of the presence of something much more Bertie Woostery in there? ;p
… I mean I get the feeling when I watch House. A big fat “bah!” at my inability to ever include everything I need to include in my first posts.
What-Ho, Danbala, I’m off to the Drones!
You guys are hilarious. Nice eclectic mix, and very telling of UF’s personallly.
But now I have an earworm … the combination of “kookie” and “Uncle Fester”, and I’m hearing a particular theme song which I will not repeat here.
HEH.
Oh, THANKS!!
Handy hint with me… NEVER assume that I’m too serious about anything…
It’s pretty damned obvious when I am… since there isn’t a blink or a nor a backstep…
Except boobies. He’s very serious about boobies.
I’d probably go with The Lucifer Principle – yes, I know, some of the refernces are sketchy, but people would start to read it, and it would f*ck up their little world… >:D
Or “Grimm’s Fairy Tales,” perhaps?
The Butter Battle Book
Oh, I don’t know…. I’d probably just swear on an entire library…. but only if idiots hadn’t put stuff back on the shelves in ALL the wrong places… gah!
Enders Game
What? No one’s said it yet?
The last book of the Harry Potter series. Obviously.
“What book would you be sworn in by?”
`
Anything that isn’t My Pet Goat.
Just so we’re all clear, y’all DO know that, according to the Constitution, Obama legally became Prez at 12:00 noon that day, no matter what anyone said or swore, then or after.
Didn’t know that. (Still dont.) Source?
^don’t
They announced it on CNN at noon, which was a few minutes before his actual swearing-in.
Also,
“Because the ceremony ran slightly long, Mr. Obama did not recite the oath of office until just after noon, the moment when he officially became president.”
cited from [link]
Thank you!
US Constitution Amendment XX: Section 1. Ratified 1933.
The terms of the President and Vice President shall end at noon on the 20th day of January….
so, for a moment, there was no one in charge… we need more moments like that…
Wouldn’t you know it? Some people were actually freaking
out because Obama signed some executive orders before
he and Justice Roberts repeated the second go-round on
the Oath of Office?
Actually someone said that since Biden was good-to-go he was actually president for like a whole five minutes. That’s probably not technically true. Just puttin it out there
I don’t think there was any point in time that he could have been president, however he was VP under Bush briefly.
Bible: not required.
So help me god: also not required, not in Constitution.
Someone told me they’d been taught in school that on the stroke of noon, inauguration day, the new pres. was pres. for real, no matter who said what to who. m. Anyone know anything about this?
He’s president, technically, at noon, regardless. However, he’s not allowed to ACT as president until taking the oath – so, you know, take it however you will.
Great… Cosmic power, and you can’t use it… God, I love the law…
Source? I’m unfamiliar with that restriction.
-
Of course, Obama was acting more like the president from the moment he won the election than the sitting president did in either of his two terms.
It’s just petty enough to be true…
Source – an amalgam of reputable sites… I sort of took what I could find in a variety of locations and pieced it together into something that was somewhat consistent. It might not be fully accurate, but it’s more or less what I was able to gather.
If you want to find “reliable” information on it, try looking it up yourself… and good luck.
Thanks.
That’s one of the wonderful things about so many of our laws, they’re so obscure or so vague as to be either unknown or unclear. Lawyers love it. It’s what maintains our need for them.
-
I kind of figured that’s what you’d done since I’ve never heard that before. You may have been the first person in history to actually deduce that.
-
I’ll have a go at some point and see if I can verify.
Thanks
I agree with you on that one — before Roberts got the phrasing wrong, there was the initial bit where Obama jumped in and started repeating before Roberts was done with the phrase he was starting with; it’s possible that was what threw Roberts off a little. The whole thing made me like them both a little more….I said to my kids “See, that’s exactly what would happen to me if I ever had to take or give an oath like that in front of millions of people…”
Love the caption, though!
Most probably it was exactly how you described it. Roberts indeed did remember the oath! He corrected himself when he repeated it after Obama got stuck, but then again Obama went on with the first uncorrected version. Almost anything that can go wrong went wrong in that moment *gg*
So this could have become an awkward moment for both of them, but they reacted very well. Roberts helped Obama when he paused, and Obama saved the situation with a friendly smile. Finally, when I learned of the second oath without the bible, that whole situation turned from a potential fail into a definite win!
Now both believers as well as nonbelievers can decide whether their president swore on the bible or not – who would have considered that possible?
Great point, Lilith! Maybe the conspiracy theorists will say that was all planned?
*runs to get tin foil hat*
Achkh!!!!! I lost my tinfoil hat!!
I make tinfoil hats… three for five pounds…
I only have one head but I could stand to lose a few pounds….
That’s one each for home, office and car. He offers
different styles, too. I have the Viking helmet, the
sombrero, and, of course the Stetson…
I definitely need the viking helmet version!
Surely he had you in mind when he designed it!
I don’t have any pounds right now. How about 8 Kroner, one peso and I balance out the rest in dollars?
Or can I make the down payment in brownies?
Oh, dear! I couldn’t do without mine! You’ll
have to negotiate directly with Unc. I hear he
barters, though…
cool!
…or, maybe I should be scared?
Sign me up for one Tinfoil Panama!
I only have gilders.
Then you’re out of luck… the guilder stopped having any value in 2002, when the banks stopped taking them…
Naturally, I thought of your comment the other day as soon
as I saw this one. Is it one of your designs?
[LINK]
No… not me
I meant the hat, not the LOL.
Mine are less form fitting…
PS: Just to be absolutely precise, when Roberts repeated the oath, it wasn’t correct either, but it proves he had realized that he had mixed it up ^^
I think it was all Roberts. The phrasing should be: “I Barack Obama”, “do solemnly swear” (or affirm), “that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the united states”, etc. Roberts talked over the president when he repeated the first phrase.
You’re right! Not that I doubted you.
WARNING! GRAPHIC CONTENT!
-
[LINK BEHIND NAME]
What’s up with the vader sounds in the background?
I wondered that myself. Foreshadowing?
Cheney was in the stands
Rehnquist just realized that there were only so many words B*sh could keep in his head at once.
BTW, did you notice that Roberts has ditched the four gold stripes on the CJ’s robe? I always thought they were a suitably, ludicrously Gilbert and Sullivan touch when Rehnquist had them.
I guess it depends on where exactly he was supposed to stop for Obama to repeat what he said; which could logically be after “Obama” or after “swear”; I would think they would have run through it at least once to rehearse but mayb not! My perception watching it was that Roberts had planned on the send of the phrase being “swear” but Obama thought it was “Obama”….who knows!
To add, since the earlier swearing-in is now linked above, it does look like at least the last time they stopped after the name, but if I was giving an oath to Bush I’d feel like I needed to do it about two words at a time, too, just because of his tendency to have difficulty with language, etc.
*GRUMBLE*
-
You’re right. Here’s Kennedy’s. Hmmm….. LOL!
Wow, they’ve got a bunch of them there!
Oh wow. Here’s Clinton. No wonder everyone’s so confused about who bungled. There really isn’t a specific precedent regarding that first clause, it appears. What I can’t believe, however, is they didn’t practice how they wanted to handle the oath beforehand. I can’t fault anyone for making a mistake, but what gives on the lack of agreement?
-
[LINK]
Oops, there are a bunch at that link. Sorry about the one below.
:blush: Above. Sigh.
Well, hmmm. I have watched all the videos clear back to Kennedy, and guess what? Bush is the only one who had the oath broken up that way (for obviousical reasonilizations).
Sorry guys, looks like Barack popped this boner first.
[LINK TO OBAMA'S OATH]
[LINK] Full article
I see what you’re saying, rho, but I fail to see where Obama was prompted to begin speaking. Can you tell me what communication cue the Chief Justice gave that would indicate such? Seriously, I can’t see it. He goes right on to the word “do” without a pause, and granted, it’s not a loud “do”, but Obama speaks right over the top of him. I am a big “conversation cues” kind of a gal: actually studied some in college.
I have a co-worker who just farking doesn’t get conversational cues: I start speaking, she barrels over the top of me, I talk louder, she drops the sonic boom — drives me batty.
I’ll guess that both of them were nervous. I heard a pause
in there, though.
Wait. How did I *hear* a *pause*???
Ummm … yeah?!?
Nerves definitely explains it. Meh, we’ll all get over it, eventually.
*dramatic pause for effect*
Yep. That’s it!
More win for Laurence Tribe. I’m nearly convinced he’ll be Mr Justice Tribe within the year.
The linked Wiki article lists Kathleen Sullivan, Barack
Obama and, yes, John G. Roberts as Tribe’s notable
students.
And thanks for reminding me of Cass Sunstein – I have a book of his somewhere on my shelves. He’d be great too, and he’s about 13 years younger.
Whatever you say there, “GenreicName112.”
Or should we say — “Mr. Chief Justice?” Or maybe just “Your Honor?”
Obama does not make mistakes. He is our beloved leader. All is well, hail our Messiah.
Service Announcement – Frou bottle whipping needed on Aisle 10, I repeat, Frou, Special Bottle Whipping, Aisle 10, Messiah outbreak…
It’s a messiah job, but someone’s gotta do it.
Aisle help if you want.
Bottle complain the whole time.
That’ll be jarring.
It helps if you pitcher yourself on a boat on a river.
Can Lucy help? Sometimes it’s tough to container.
Yes, she always puts on a brave vase,
with her looking glass eyes.
Well, she certainly is an interesting vessel, what with those eyes and all.
Yes, her mug would be nothing special
without them – they shine like diamonds.
Yes, they are a cup-ala beauties, those.
Why do I have to use a bottle? Why can’t I use my Magic Broom ™ ?
Hmmm… a Texan who’s never seen a bottling… okay…
You use what you’re comfy with, lovely.
I see Obama has sent his flying monkeys after you.
Be gone, before someone drops a house on you, too.
Throw a bucket of water on it, see if it melts!
Actually, they’re more like the Rottweilers who protect young Damien in the Omen- very appropriate reference!
You know the rules HHNAF:
myspace citation or it isn’t true.
Damien…uh..Obama Hussein is our beloved leader and makes no mistakes! ( Have that chief justice executed for embarassing him!) All hail the Chosen One! (cue singing children and release the doves)
It’s like the intensely annoying little brother who always
picks up the extension when you talk with friends. Please,
Cheez and Tofu, can you get rid of this jerkoff?
Wiki: “Experienced participants in online forums know that the most effective way to discourage a troll is usually to ignore him or her, because responding tends to encourage trolls to continue disruptive posts — hence the often-seen warning: ‘Please do not feed the trolls.’ “
Yeah, yeah, I know. But *try* ignoring that
nasty little brother who heavy-breathes during
your convos. You finally run to Mom and Dad.
If not cell phones, then Super Glue…
(Back in my day it was duct tape and velcro,
but the ends justify whatever means…)
But sometimes it’s just so slow here, and then I get bored, and then it’s very hard not to throw some troll or other a tidbit, or least poke them in the arse with a long pointy stick, or …
<small voice> I’m sorry </small voice>
I think this one just has a Fester-fetish (some would say that that’s quite understandable) and then went nova on us. I tried stamping on its fingers some time ago, by PK ate.
It’s the trick, isn’t it? Some trolls are worth scratching under the chin, and some you end up wishing that they’d never been born.
But if PK gets rid of the jerkoffs, there would be no one left here! Including you!
There speak a true veteran…
*raises hand*
There have been dozens of Festerites. They
come and go, of course. This one has more
stamina than usual. Perhaps he’s exploring
why Unc’s ball gag references have such
strange appeal…
As we know, the guy is dumber than most.
Do you suppose he thinks his name spells
“Auntie” Fester?
Sure seems like he’s a little UF-curious!
The only other one I’ve heard about so far is called “evil pundit.”
I’m not sure EP wasn’t a ringer. He was the
best troll imo, but others would probably think
MegaBob was better. There were tons of
others, but I’ve forgotten most of the names.
I loved MegaBob’s last speech: “I haven’t been on in MONTHS, I just turned up just now and saw you accusing someone of being me…. Screw all you liberals -I’m moving to the Cayman Islands….”
That speech deserves the Uncle Fester Pink Flounce toaster of Joy!
[link]
In this case, Troll boy isn’t actually upsetting anyone, just making himself looks a dick…
Then why so many comments, assboy?
Assboy? Dude, that’s teh geh!
Maybe that’s why he’s not in the military –
Someone asked, he told!
Because I’m upsetting you and I’m actually finding it fun, the gods protect the tattered remnants of my blackened soul…
You try everything to make yourself somehow seem a lot better than you are, and with every comment you simply fail…
I’m enjoying watching you make an ever bigger fool of yourself…
Schadenfreude, thy name is Fester…
Still wrapping yourself in the honour fot he dead to give you gravitas…
‘Lest We Forget’?
You just spit on their graves, arse…
The one who uses the dead to justify his crass, empty posturing…
I’ll give you one thing… gall. You’re just a nauseating little retard…
Still pretending to be a Veteran? Nasty little tick on the underbelly of a the New World.
And you still refuse to list what military service you’ve done.
Answer- NONE. Coward.
ah the final recourse… coward… been called worse by more dangerous than you… means little…
Sad
Babbling
Little
Man
Why on earth would I want to compare notes with an idiot like you, who simply is loud, and urinates of the memory of people who DID give their all? hmm
Tell me that…
You’re probably claim to be a ‘veteran’ like my ex-husband did:
He was enlisted during Operation Enduring Freedom, but never left the country.
He was also discharged for not being able to get out of bed on time.
Yup, you two’d get along.
Yet there is no mystery why You’re not married anymore……
His fault, not mine…
You know that line about “forsaking all others”? Yeah, he didn’t.
SO, not content with trying to bully teen agers, you decide to try and pick on women in general… Is this really the kind of image the military want these days?
Sad
Babbling
Wannabe…
I’m just waiting for him to blame my ex’s infidelity on me.
Icing on top of the troll cake.
Ohh .. I want to do it first!
If you weren’t such a so and so ice princess … blahity blaberig blah bleahbloo!
Yeah, how dare I get pregnant! He had nothing to do with it!
And all that weight I gained… and I had no tolerance for his asshattery when I was in labor…
How double dare you, you insolent twat! Get behind me … where you belong!
I will now fornicate with your bff, you will watch, and you will LIKE IT!
NO ICE CREAM FOR YOU!!!!!
LOL!
You can have my ice cream…
WHEN YOU TAKE IT FROM MY COLD, DEAD HANDS!
Okay, now I AM ROFL.
Well played, ES, well played.
*steals cone and runs like hell*
I try.
*curtsies*
*runs after you with a spork*
Squee! Never been sporked!
*stands still*
*poke poke*
*snaps photo for LOL*
*proudly graces frontpage with ES based on a rho-captioned sporking*
Totally worth i!
Was it good for you, too?
*smokes cigarette*
*numbness and tingling gone*
Yup. Sure enuff.
I’m a miracle worker!
The Anne Sullivan of sporking …
Lol…I can’t believe I missed this.
*drinks coffee*
*considers having ice cream for breakfast*
Next hour… he won’t be able to help it…
there’ll be either a ‘fat’ or and ‘ugly’ comment… you can guarantee it…
He’s really pathetic and I should ignore him, bout the Teeth of Yahweh, he’s just too much fun… it’s like poking catfish in a bucket…
I’m not upset by it. I know a whole town that’ll tell you he traded down. *flpis hair*
Sometimes it’s fun to Poke The Bear.
Flip. I flipped my hair. *kicks comment box*
I like the ‘flpis’ word…
It’s a great word! Sounds norty, too…
*test*
“Get your hobo-humping flpis over here.”
Yep, works for me…
That’s it, rho, talk qwerty to me.
Hey, get off me!
I don’t want to see your uvula!
Maybe he wants to drive your Volvo.
As long as I don’t have to live on a
peninsula…
…with a practicing thespian?
As DWN would say…
with a pianist.
His approval ratings are comparable to those of Bush when he first came into office [LINK], yet no one mockingly called Bush the Messiah. (Eeeeeewww, I just wrote “Bush the Messiah”!) I wonder why Obama-haters whine about Bush-haters making fun of Bush? At least Bush earned his criticisms.
Butt hurt bad losers…
“Honestly I thought it was Obama’s screw up.”
“I think Obabma [sic] was just a bit too anxious and we got to see it in this instance.”
Who’s being too anxious? Can’t wait for the guy to screw up, can you?
The whole thing is a conspiracy by the republicans to find some way to get rid of Obama because he’s undoing all the stupid sh!t Bush did. XD
They actually did a second ceremony to get it right. I don’t think Roberts meant to screw it up, he just thought he was too good to use notecards. They ought to use him for advertising for index cards–”Don’t pull a Roberts! Use note cards!”
Maybe the Chief Justice can pick up some extra coin by doing commercials for Avery — “When accuracy matters, use Avery index and note cards!”
Or for ginseng –
(comment pending censor approval for f-word usage …)
You mean gingko biloba? I always forget which is which, too….
lol my bad.
That would probably make a good catch-line for gingko bilboa right there!
Gingko is the one that comes from the trees with the pretty fan-shaped leaves, and is supposed to help memory. Ginseng is a root that is dug out of the ground and is supposed to help bamp-chicka-bamp-bamp.
I think he got rattled by actually saying the name “hussein”. I loved that!
Giggleworthy lol.
Hahaha, great, love it.
Justice Roberts does have a ‘former frat boy’ quality to him…
“I, state your name, pledge allegiance to the frat…”
No such thing as ‘former’, unless you resigned or were expelled. Fraternity and sorority oaths are for life.
When you’re a Jet you’re a Jet all the way,
From your first cigarette, to your last dying day…
One the more nauseas things about American culture… Preppy Gangs.
lawl preppy gangs.
I just puked a little in my mouth.
The semi-secret-society subculture of the fraternity is not strictly American, silly Brit; they’re just more accessible to the lower and middle classes in US universities. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, maybe you went to the wrong schools.
Only ‘right’ schools I went to were if I was going to go to prison…
And the old school net work is just by being minted, not getting hazed and wearing colours… which owes more to gang ‘culture’ than anything else
In Belgium, all universities have tens of fraternities: faculty, regional, political,…
*Waves a small flag with the EU symbol on it*
Wait Fester, that’s your problem with Americans? You judge us by how we’re portrayed in ’60s musicals?
Do you really want to go there? *cough* Gilbert & Sullivan *cough*
[Link]
One of my favorite G&S-esque (from Family Guy)
I couldn’t find the actual clip, just the audio.
Actually posting the link might help [Link]
Mostly by the news and verbal descriptions…
At some point in time, sombody’s going to explain to me how the hell these fraternity / sorority things work – and why they’re so damn important, and why people throw half the Greek alphabet at them (Pratchett suggested Eta Beta Pi as a good name).
It’s a little bit more confusing than that, even. Some fraternities and
sororities have Greek letter names, but aren’t considered to be part of
the “Greek System,” and are thereby called “Independent.” Very
churchy, that…
Near as I can tell (having gone to Brandeis at the time when the Greeks were outlawed by University policy but existed as shadow organizations), the ones in the System have chapters at schools all over the country and are affiliated in a national (or international!) organization.
It’s because people don’t have enough personality to have their own identity at University…
I thought it was painfully obvious.
F/S membership is also billed as a great networking tool for the job
market later. It’s amazing that it sometimes works as such.
Blackmail comes to mind…
“Give me a job or I’ll bring the photos from … to your family/colleagues” etc. :p
LOL!! That’s probably more common than not.
In 1999, a colleague of mine was excited at the election
outcome, not because he was Republican, but because he
was a Delta Kappa Epsilon, though not from Yale. Strange.
Same ring, probably…
I made this awhile back … just for fun, y’all.
[LINK]
Did I mention I work as an academic advisor at a university, and see Greek system students in my program wash out all the time? Too many other commitments to go to their science and math labs.
I was a member of Gamma Sigma Sigma, one of
those do-gooder, non-Greek sororities. I would have
probably forgotten by now, if it weren’t for all of the
junk mail…
The Greeks had extreme grade problems, despite
rumors that each house had tests on file from most
classes and professors. The problem may have been
that the members memorized the answers given by
their drunken/hung-over peers, instead of looking
up the correct ones.
The phrase ‘Greek system’… maybe it’s my classical history colouring my view, but it sounds like a euphemism for pederasty…
OK, honi soit que mal y pense… but I mostly think evil, so nothing new there.
“Too many other commitments to go to their science and math labs.”
`
Although perhaps not the meth labs.
LOL–Obama doesn’t look very natural in that pic. It
looks as though the other guy is teaching him some-
thing. He’s aces at basketball, body surfing, etc., but
imo his gang signs are up there with his bowling cred.
I dusted off the linked TLL, if you like that sort of thing.
I know this. My bad.
Maybe I meant ‘former’ as in he’s supposed to have given up the beer-bong days.
You make Chief Justice Roberts sound like Caroline Kennedy. “I, y’know, do, like, um, solemnly, y’know, swear…”
Now we can harangue our teenagers and say, ‘Do your homework! Do your prep! You want to be like that judge, totally unprepared for the big day?’.
Or pretend that all of America ISN’T watching you so that you aren’t as nervous.
Well, they are used to playing to an empty stage … most of their appeals and hearings are closed to the general public, I believe — can anyone help me out here?
From supremecourtus.org:
Rule 4. Sessions and Quorum
1. Open sessions of the Court are held beginning at 10 a.m.
on the first Monday in October of each year, and thereafter
as announced by the Court. Unless it orders otherwise, the
Court sits to hear arguments from 10 a.m. until noon and
from 1 p.m. until 3 p.m.
I’m assuming open sessions means open to an audience. Only thing I could find…
Dunno if that helps.
Hah hah! Obama’s dumb!!!!!
Remove the ‘chi’ from your name. It’d be more accurate.
Japanese FAIL!
Posting FAIL.
Fishing Pail
lol
Milking pail…
Bilking snail.
U.S. Mail
Over dale.
… dusty trail…
Third rail
Under shale.
rusty nail..
looking pale
Busty male?
kitten tail
Chopped meat sale.
Mopped seat male.
Soft leaf kale.
ginger ale
Nagging hangnail.
fish’s scale
Heavy bale
Baggy tail
Beluga whale
garlic snail
roasted quail
hirsute Christian Bale
Salivating female
Batman’s… tail.
Friar with a leather flail
Read by braille.
Salad with Kale
Go to jail …
travel with sail
Drink some ale
bread gone stale
Seek the grail
Windy gale
Hey you all I gotta bail
Read those kids a children’s tale!
Way too frail
Hey, don’t assail!
Rain, sleet and hail
Ridden out on a rail
Gopher tail
Like Bush and Quayle
‘twould be to no avail …
Like drinking Champale
WJC did not inhale!
GWB is full of fail
BHO is feelin’ hale
Here, have an ale!
Kegger at Yale …
Miss Abigail
sex in a hay bale
hex in a bay sale
T. Rex drinking ale
…festival, is Doug the Subway Fugitive Not a Slave to Fashion Bongo Boy Berman.
Our ombudsman is Heywood Yabuzzoff, our Russian chauffeur service si Pickop Andropov, our anger management counselor is Kirsten Hollard, and as ever legal representation is provided by Atty. Hugh Lewis Dewey of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe.
LOVE Click n Clack!
I swear I’m going to make a macro of that to post a derail whenever one of these rhyme threads gets out of hand!
What the hell…..?
Dammit, Dale!
Gargamel
Lol. Even Bush didn’t screw that up. *Omen loading*
Finally got your own name?
I’m glad that I’m enough of a threat to you liberals that I deserve the “Palin/McCain” treatment. You are a typical Liberal- liar, whiner, truth twisters and childish taunters- I’m so glad you elected the perfect person to represent you !
Actually no, you’re an object of mockery and derision… we simply invoke you since we know your tiny, little, ego, and your great, big, inadequacy problem, will bring you out of the woodwork every time…
So, tell us more of your ‘dead friends’… retard.
OH, and I’m a Limey. Nyarlathotep ain’t my headache, he’s yours… andyou’re just a LOSER.
You know, it’s always people like you that take the brush of character and paint a much more gruesome painting of typically good people, just to portray them in a way that fits *your* view of the world.
I’m a center-left. I voted for Obama. Does that make me any of those things?
Eat your words, dark doppleganger of Fester.
DARK?!? I resent that. The descriptive pronoun you were searching for was ‘Milquetoast’…
xD *can’t think of a response*
“Yes, you’re quite right!”
would have been wholly acceptable…
“Schmucky doppelganger” just doesn’t sound quite right.
So you are John?
Sock fail…
Yeah, the one and only thing he got right is what allowed him to get everything else so wrong. Go figure… And you’re proud of this?
okay, leave the poor Reverend alone. it was a little mistake. it´s not that big of deal. move on!
But it was funny…
Yes, thank you. We’ve now all seen the error of our ways.
PunditKitchen! You need to close up shop now, Kelly has spoken.
Cue the LEAVE BRITNEY ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE troll, hehe.
Um, Kelly? That wasn’t a Reverend. I’m pretty sure Chief Justice Roberts is not a man of the cloth as well…! Identification fail, I’m afraid!
Guessing that a Republican appointed Justice has some tuppenny-ha’penny religious qualification isn’t THAT left field…
Obama Bin Laden!
Is this some sort of “Where’s Wally?” pastiche? OBL is airbrushed into the crowd and we have to find him?
Where’s Waldo. But it would be neat if there was like a “Where’s Wall-E”. I love Wall-E.
I really just needed an excuse to talk about Wall-E, Unc. Nothing against you know you’re a Brit.
It’s Wally in the Old Country…
You don’t have Wall-E across the pond?
Of course… I was referring to Waldo… which to me, means a remote
control replacement for a human…
Oh, you mean like the Chief Justice?
“I pledge allegience.
To Obama
And the Socialist States of America.
And to the Democratic Party
Who annointed HIM,
A Divided Nation,
Under Allah,
With higher taxes for all.”
Ah, a new cretin… Having said that, Bush made it clear that, when push comes to shove, Socialism is the underpinning of those who whore the Austrian School
As to the Allah comments… oh, you retard… you complete and utter retard…
I was kinda hoping this new one would just get ignored by everyone. I’m guessing it’s actually NOBama08 hiding behind the new name. The wit is about the same.
We got a good reaction from dear old AF, so maybe he’s the Nobama chappie…
I like playing with their tiny minds… I’m still waiting for Liberal trolls worth the steel…
Except AF seems to have a thing for you personally. I don’t think NOBama can see anything else through his seething rage for our new President and those of us who aren’t butt-buddies to the bushes. (I love alliteration when it just falls into place)
I’ll see your Bush butt-buddy and raise you a snickering,
sniveling, snot-nose…
Aggravating, angry, Adirondack
Bouncing, balloonlike boobies…
Am I supposed to be taking that personally rho??
Only if I get tired of raising the snot-nose, and pack him off
to live with you…
He can be my chum (when searching for sharks that is).
  
Who are we talking about anyway?
LOL!! It was a play on the words, “I’ll *raise* you a
snickering, sniveling, snot-nose…”
Get it? If not, trust me: It’s brilliant!
OIC
Not quite time-travel quality wit, but ok. (ie your ‘will have been washing my hair then’)
I guess my ‘chum’ pun fit right in with your pun then.
It certainly did. And, to be fair, few jokes
survive explanation…
I’ve got more entertaining people wanting my hide than him…
I’ve been waiting for a liberal troll, too. Where the hell are they?
*shrug* who can say?
I’ve been waiting for a liberal troll
One with a sharp tongue and a head that will roll
All of the old ones were pathetically droll
So now I’m still waiting, and I’m losing control
Hopelessly waiting…for a liberal…troll!
Ah, a new idiot… Having said that, Bush made it clear that, when push comes to shove, Socialism is the underpinning of those who whore the Austrian School
As to the Allah comments… oh, you retard… you complete and utter retard…
Ah, a new idiot…
Dull. very, very dull… Socialist? Please… cretin
and the Allah comment… well, that establishes you as simply subnormal….
Interesting… PK delayed those… I wonder what the key words are…
Allah?
Appears to be. That got delayed for a while.
interesting…
So, has the Anti Fester finally found his own name?
somehow, I doubt it… even if he did, he’d be easily identified…
As many posts as you put on here everyday, it’s obvious that you do not have a job, do you? Or, you have a government job…
So what’s your excuse? Did you rob a library to get the computer you post from?
It’s shift change at Burger King…
Me? well, I can just do this. since I made mods since I ‘retired’[link]
however, let’s see what type of SH1-T that AntiF is talking today? [link]
Funny!! It never loses its comedic value, does it?
The Bristol School of Enterology Stool Form Scale – the gift that just gives and gives…
A must-have for everyone who doesn’t know sh1t.
Even if it was a bit muffed, all of the words he spoke were actual english words, so that’s already a step up from the last administration.
I hope to inspire everyone to speak in four-five word spurts at a time.
I believe in hope………hope for all Americans…….If you believe in hope……
you too can give hope……hope for the middle class……that is the working class……I have beliefs that you…..that you can believe in……hope that you can…..that you can hope for…..and by looking back….back at the past….we can look forward….forward to the future.
Thank you,
Imperator Obama
You forgot the ‘uh’ and ‘er’ and other pauses that he takes five at a time every other sentence group.
that’s to add a frission of uncertainty to the rubes, dear…
It’s due to the short attention span, both of the speaker and the audience… only thing that makes him a suitable ruler is that he can think in 7 word sentences, not 5…