I am bored of Soviet Russia joke.
I am bored of Soviet Russia joke. Make me laugh, funny lol builder man.
(Vladimir Putin)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption:
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In Soviet Russia, lol builds you!
“What mean ’smile’ mister funny picture taking man.”
Ironic FAIL !
also Fuhst !
well um… nevermind that “fuhst” thing.
blini!
What does “fuhst” mean anyway?
Depends on whether you’re English or not…
I’m American.. Does that count? ;o)
NO!
Hmmmm…. I wouldn’t know…
In America, do you viciously murder (or muhdeh) Rs (ahs) and then force the poor truncated words to rhyme with R-less words? And not only are Rs banished, sometimes they are cruelly forced to squeeze into words where there is no room for them. ( “I SAWR that.” “It’s the LAWR.”)
Ok, I admit that I am guilty of the glottal stop (particularly at the end of words) but so are some English. Their Rs AND their Ts!!! Truly barbaric.
*sniff*
Poor Rs…. And the unhappy, bereft words are forced to talk about 1966…
But I’m sure Americans don’t do that….
Or pronounce “ch” as “ck”……
We cant help it we took your language and made everyone understand it
You took the language and butchered it.
Colour, metre, tyre, mum.
That is how it should be done.
Hey, we’re speaking the King’s English, and that’s not how Elvis spells things!
Butchered it to you, but at least our english allows us to speak
spanish properly… Funniest thing Ive ever heard is my English
buddy ordering at a Mexican restaurant.
Wasn’t there a study a few years ago that found American English to be closer to Old English than Britain English?
You should go to Appalachia. They speak a really weird form of The King’s English (actual proper English) up in the mountains. It’s so far back in there that they have to pipe in sunshine, but being so sequestered has allowed them to keep a lot of the old traditions alive.
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Of course, if you go, take a banjo and some Vaseline.
That’s a case of different native accents, not different spellings. There are a dozen different accents in England alone, add that to the many in the rest of the UK, three in Australia, and many more around the rest of the natively English speaking world (that can spell correctly). And you will find some of us can fake Spanish accents to a workable level, while some will fail miserably.
.
And the US have about as many different accents as the UK, so not all of you will be able to speak Spanish as fluently as you personally might.
(Although I can only really distinguish three accents. Southern, Boston, and the rest.)
.
We also have less need to speak Spanish, because we don’t have millions jumping the border every year who can’t speak anything else.
don’t forget there are dialects too, above accents.
If you’re in Devon and Cornwall and call someone a ‘grackle’ they’y know you mean tourist. Go to Essex, call someone a ‘grackle’ and they’ll have no clue what you mean.
Where I was born, there were about three dialects in the same town, so, you could call someone a Grufty Teg for farting loundly and either be greeted with howling laughter, or a stunned silence while they tried to translate it.
@PiMan: Don’t forget Californian, (Like, I’m so trying to get in touch with my inner child, okay?)
California to me sounds like either southern, or the rest of the country, depending on who is speaking.
u lnow we never found out what fuhst even means
Is Digg.com making this site load really really crappily for anyone else besides me?
No, but I am annoyed with the “People that like this lol also liked…” thing.
Seconded.
Yeah, what’s up with that crap, anyway?
Same here. Mine keeps needing to close IE, and it’s really annoying me.
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PK Gods, little help over here?
Yeah my IE keeps blowing up as well.
Well there’s your problem. You’re using IE.
Don’t, and you fix everything.
*sigh* So I hear.
Chrome is free and out of beta. You can still keep IE and use it for some of your applications (like my banking site, which works better with IE). Whenever I failed to hold my tongue just right, I’d get that stupid “needs to close” message. I’ve never gotten anything near that from Chrome.
True, but I am at work. They frown upon me improving my computer without authorisation.
Get them to authorise Firefox. It is the second most popular browser, and one of the closest to web standards. (Safari and Opera are slightly closer, but I find them less usable. And I don’t have the experience with Chrome to comment.
It’s an ‘improvement’…
Absolutely!! My PC is having fits, ever since the Digg stuff was added.
This place is getting waaay too cluttery, imo.
I read your post, thought “Yes, it’s a bit much now”, when a thought struck me. I promptly tested if it was true, and it was, and ack, ack, ack, I hope people in general use Firefix+Adblock (or whatever the similar thing for IE could be).
.
There are ADS adding to this spamminess, for heaven’s sake!!11!!!!11!!
.
*is in shock*
And by “Firefix” I am not referring to any special, cool add-on, I am just typoing “Firefox”.
P
The sad part is, I’m using Firefox + Adblock, and it’s still slower than a tortoise. =(
Yeah, Adblock wouldn’t do anything for that. I was more talking about the visual clutteredness in response to rhorho’s message there…
/
.
But yesh, the horrible load time spikes seem to be digg. sux0r
Mine still loads fast enough (quelle surprise) but yes, too cluttered.
Let’s not ask for an overhaul, since they always screw up the
good stuff, never know what to leave the hell alone (not you, n8, I’m
sure, but what’s with that, do they never use the site themselves?).
Just a moratorium on adding new things. And while I’m at it,
Nostalgic Win = huge fail, booooring. Hm… how come while I’m
typing this, the last two words disappear out the right side of the
box? Please tell me this isn’t going to be one of those days.
I once wrote a message-board application in PHP, just for grins and to learn the language. It looked better than this, and you never lost sight of what you were typing.
If you use Explorer instead of Firefox, your text doesn’t disappear, and IMO the font is easier to read. (I have astigmatism, so YMMV.)
Nevermind. I just read your post recommending against IE.
Okay, not your post–I’m too sleepy!
*zzzzz*
Mine still loads fast enough
P
Mine does most of the time. It’s not a general sluggishness for me, more temporary hangups/lag spikes/whatchamacallits* that happen.
.
*)Yeah, I’m an IT professional.
Same, mine generally loads ok (in Firefox w/adblock) but occasionally on pages with a lot of comments, it takes a while and in that case, I have to be on that particular screen/tab for it to load. I’ve tried minimizing but I always come back to the same half blank screen.
It’s possible to block Digg with Adblock plus
( I do
Ah, look at that. That did improve things.
)
For people stuck using IE, I recommend Privoxy as an ad blocker. It functions as a proxy server, which you specify in your connection settings. Works great for IE, Google Chrome, Opera, whatever.
How does one get stuck using IE?
Yeah, Firefox has a free download.
I’m stuck by a work server that doesn’t think I am worthy of administrator access to install new software. Stupid werk server
)
*thinks ebil thoughts about Froo’s werk server*
Yeah, I’ve tried to convince them to give me administrator privileges before myself. (On my work server, not Froo’s…)
My laptop seems to get angry every time I try to download it. I’m going to have to bring it to school and get one of my friends to beat it into submission.
In your second sentence, were you still talking about your laptop? ;o)
Maybe. ; )
It’s quite common that you aren’t allowed to download, install or even run any “unapproved” software at work. I had a job at a large Swedish company owned by a large American company, where the rules, for security reasons, were very strict, and we had to use IE. Bitter sweet irony.
thats because ur in sweedish work, u dont do anything for us so y should we help u?
Oh yeah? One word.. Volvo!
Problem with Privoxy is that it can choke under high load, since it’s just a Mix server network
Yeah, I’m wondering if they actually pay a web design professional to do this stuff, or if they just got someone’s nephew to do it. This place could use an overhaul.
…and my rates are quite reasonable…
…All the Vodka you can drink? =D
I’m actually trying to scale down my alcohol intake… I’ll work for Xbox points, though.
*rummages through purse*
How about some Orbit teeth whitening gum, and a Walmart gift card (dunno how much is left on it)?
“a Walmart gift card”
Sorry, Rho, but you just lost fifty points of liberal cred.
I disagree…because she has no idea how much is on it, someone must have given it to her.
Rho is far too sweet not to kindly accept a gift….(well, I suppose there might be SOME gifts she won’t accept, but cards are fairly innocuous)
It was a door prize, and I practically ran to the front of the room to claim it. Deal!
Oops, this was an answer to PM. *You* are the nice one!
To n8 at 8:19AM:
I’ve seen a mention at the bottom of the home page re “jobs”
at C-brgr Network. Prapz they cd use yr skills. These sites are so
incredibly restorative and cheering to me yes, EVEN the HEAVY
SARCASM, that I’d hate to see this all crash under the tonnage of
its own popularity.
Is that what’s doing it?
I think so. I’m on my job’s computer, and it’s pretty darn fancypants. Speedy as hell, and whatnot. Not since the Digg.com stuff though, with this site anyway, and when it reaaaaally drags, it always says “Loading Digg.com” in the bottom bar.
You are not alone there. ROFLrazzi is particularly bad.
My SOH is borscht.
I made you a joke, but it was too ruskie.
No, no! It’s all wrong! In Soviet Russia, you bore jokes!
(I’ll go sit in the corner now and be ashamed of myself)
Putin on the breaks?
breaks. BRAKES. coffee. COFFEE.
*sets up IV with caffeine drip*
You’re latte! Where have you bean??
Pulling all the shots.
Yes, it’s back to the grind.
Riding in the espresso lane on the machine of life.
Mikey Corleone got shot… it was a capp-a-cino.
If Jane reads this, it will be grounds for divorce!
Thats ok, I enjoy the challenge of dragging her back in… with a tractor beam.
Why so hasty? I think you should percolate for a while yet.
He might want a whipping.
Yeah, he’s frothing and foaming at the mouth.
Hahaha is that like “Putin on the ritz”?
OMG! Now I’ve got that Taco song stuck in my head!!!! *reaches for brain bleach*
Brain bleach! ROFL!
I am liking his “come hither” look in his eyes. Very compelling, that.
If by “come hither” you mean the “I know where all the bodies are buried, and I can add yours too” look in his eyes…
Win.
Not to be confused with his “playful” look, or his “seductive” look, or his “figuring out a difficult math problem in his head” look, or his “annoyed” look, or his “mildly bored” look, or his “trying to remember when he last took his car in for an oil change” look…
`
Oh, wait; they’re all pretty much the same, aren’t they?
It’s like Steven Segal, with one more look (which gives him a total of two).
Putin’s looks are all pretty much the same? Putin is Zoolander? Who knew?
Hey, wait–You forgot the cute chicky-holding look. (link)
Aww! *heart melts*
<3 Vlad. I don’t know if I would come hither though… his judo is impressive.
…
)
So, do you always engage in judo with people who do the “come hither”-thing at you?
You wouldn’t by any chance often find that you mysteriously scare off potential relationshipmaterials?
…
He just looks like he’s going to kill someone… 98 percent of the time.
Otherwise he looks like he’s calling someone a noob.
When my BF does the come hither look I obey.
Ah. I think I failed in joking again. I do that quite often, so at least I am used to it.
)
P
.
The only thing I really meant was that it “worried” (jokingly worried) me that you would so quickly relate to judo when someone wrote about a “come hither”-look (that expression to me has always meant an erotically and/or sensually inviting look?)
.
Things often seem much funnier in my head than they do when they end up on screen. Or on paper. Or as spoken by my mouth.
He just seems like a shifty person.
He’d invite you in under the guise of erotic purposes then quickly
change to I KEEL YOU! I see him using his attractiveness against me.
Your post was funny, after I reread it! I posted before I read the first part.
I fail.
Ah yes. After your latest post I have a feeling we both understand each other better at least.
)
The other 2% of the time he’s just pissed off…
My judo is non-existent. He’d decimate me.
*hisses*
Decimate means to kill off 10% of a group.
It also means to destroy a great number of something.
I’m sure he’d destroy a great number of my limbs.
*sticks out tongue*
dec-i-mate [des-uh-meyt]
–verb (used with object), -mat -ed, -mat -ing.
1. to destroy a great number or proportion of: The population was decimated by a plague.
2. to select by lot and kill every tenth person of.
3. Obsolete. to take a tenth of or from.
He may have been thinking he would “decimate” only 1/10 of him. Vernacular, AC. Vernacular.
oooooh.
Foiled again!
I hates da stinkin vernacular….
*Shakes fist*
Ve shall meet again Captain Wow.
*pets cat and breathes through ventilator for added villain kudos*
Me FTW!
Nice. Can I have my cat back?
But ai likez it heer in teh dark side. Dey can has cookies!
Maggie get back here!!! You’ll freeze again!!! I have cookies too you know.
You have cookies?
Somebody said “cookies.” I *distinctly* heard it that time!
I think I did too. Cookies?
I do have cookies
Chocolate, chocolate chocolate chip, chocolate chip, peanut butter chocolate chip, chocolate peanut butter chocolate chip…
And Milk.
“Pliz to remove decadent capitalist clothing, Comrade Hotstuff.”
Tessie, FTW!
Do I have a second???
Late, but yes, seconded!
If you’re blue and you don’t know where to go to, why don’t you go where fashion sits.. Putin on the ritz.
vlad do you mean?
Oh you’re just putin on the moves.
(You’re so sweet, I’ll be putin on the pounds).
I’d hate to be russian you into anything…
Better to be russian into things than Stalin…
Ok, I’ll Lenin that one slide, be grad though.
Thanks, I have to go to the dry cleaners Andropov some shirts to be pressed.*cringes while typing*
Ivan to scold you for that Terrible comment.
You haven’t seen the really terrible ones nyet.
Great, the puns will just Peter out.
zzzzzzz….huh?….oh…sorry, I just woke up from the Anastasia….
I could probably keep Hammering you with Russian puns, but I’m getting Sickle of trying to come up with more…
Soviet veel vee talk about next?
Shoes and ships and ceiling wax?
I don’t know, Cosmonaut sure where the conversation would go…
Of borscht and czars
And why the Baltic is boiling hot.
Somebody needs to make a real men of genius ad.
Today we salute you Mr. Funny LOL Builder man.
*mr funny lol builder man!*
<3 those!
Agreed.
Ask and ye shall receive…
*intro music for Real Men of Genius*
Today, we salute you Mr. Funny Lol Builder Man.
*Mr. Funny Lol Builder man!*
Whether it be political, celebrity, or just the news, your jokes will be misinterpreted and reemed by hundreds of people who just dont get it.
*This lol is so racist!
Armed only with your keyboard, a cup of coffee, and wit so dull it couldnt cut through melted butter, you proudly post your regurtitated subject material with
pride
*Lol McCain is OOOOOOOld!*
So break out the advanced lol builder and slap on the captions oh great Czar of the Zingers, because we all know, we’re definately not laughing WITH you.
*Mr. Funny Lol builder maaaaan!*
And before anyone tries to say this sucked… try writing your own, its harder than it looks.
Also.. I totally murdered the word regurgitated… nice
Let’s see here. *pulls out calculator*
Missing one out of twelve letters…Wait, no. I never remember which one goes first…okay…that looks right…91.67% correct: A-, but your conduct grade pulls that up to a solid A, with A+ all over the rest!
Is there an opportunity for extra credit?
Of course!
*hands Steve a basket full of ironing*
Funny LOL Builder Man,
Sitting in LOL Builder Land,
Making all his Builder LOL’s
for Nobody.
(Isn’t he a bit like you and me?)
Hey, I thought it was kind of awesome. I could almost hear the backup-singer-voice, too. XD
I second the awesomeness.
Max FTW!
This gets funnier the more you stare at it.
Possibly because we are going insane from staring into his eyes. :O
But if you hold a mirror up to your screen, you’ll notice even his picture gives off no reflection…
I just loled so much coke came out of my nose. Thanks a lot mothergoose! Coke burns!
You shouldn’t be snorting it so close to your computer!!!
I tried to snort coke once; I inhaled an ice cube instead.
Ice is frozen water!
Just to clarify it was COCA COLA not COCAINE… okay? Guys?
*cops bust down my door*
Gotta go.
Cocaine *generally* doesn’t burn, but thanks for clarifying anyway. : )
Ehm… Well… It burns the same way a cigarette might.. It gets a little cherry and you can inhale it. This is not crack BTW.
I don’t know this from personal experience *whistles*
Oh, and as one of my friends liked to say “coke with the bubbles”.
When asked “coke” or “pepsi”, my dad responds “Coke. Ever try snorting pepsi?”
In capitalist America, joke becomes bored of you.
Is it odd that I read this with a Russian accent???
No?
Oh yeah. Definitely quoting this in a cheesy Russian accent tomorrow morning.
Just think of what we could’ve done in the horrornukewarfear yrs of the Cold War.
Khrushchev & his SHOE. Khrushchev throws a tantrum cuz they wouldn’t take him to Disneyland. If only we’d had Pundit Kitchen back then. *sighs*
If I don’t say it, someone else will so:
IN SOVIET RUSSIA, JOKE IS BORED OF YOU
tisk tisk tisk
its true this russian is bored