I’m either going to shake your hand…
I’m either going to shake your hand or grab her ass, and as you know, I don’t always make the best decisions.
(George Bush, Laura Bush, Michelle Obama, Barack Obama)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: fastfood
First?
Plus I lol’d for truth.
isn’t it obvious that he goes for a handshake with obama? he’s facing him, too…
No, it isn’t obvious. It’s funny because of perspective and that it looks like he will be grabbing her.
Kinda dumb caption but I LOVE those shoes!!! Nice dress, too.
Bush: “I don’t know whether to shake hands or grab ass…I never did understand black people.”
Kara, sounds like yet another disgruntled gun-toting, non-caucasian hating Republican to me..
I lol’d my butt off at this one.
Can I grab it when you’re done lolling?
No, because he lol’d it off.
I am a she….not a he
Well that changes everything.
Sorry Hammy! I didn’t know…
It’s rather difficult to tell on here sometimes. I have to admit I found it strange that the person who was attempting to grab my butt had no way of knowing what my gender was either. I guess they are an equal opportunity butt grabber.
You are more than welcome to try and grab it. I, however, cannot be held responsible for any injuries resulting in the attempt.
That’s why i laughed, michelle is no Misty May, she would so kick his tail. Hey what would the SS do, do you think the details would duke it out protecting their primaries, or just sit back and watch Pres Bush get hammered.
Second, and I loled for justice and the american way!
Your name fits you in this instance. ;D
so does yours
He’s just got a little time left to make some real bad mistakes. He’s got to jump on that!
I see him dressed in a Santa suit, making a list of Naughty and Nice. The Nice ones get wrist watches, and the Naughty ones get pardons.
“PS: rorho followed with another devastating joke at Bush’s expense! The paramedics who brought me around were awfully concerned, but ultimately I convinced them I would quit reading PunditKitchen and therefor would be all right for the rest of the evening.
PPS: I lied to them
*Pops some fresh popcorn for Portland Mark*
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Uh, I don’t know how to break this to you. Are you sitting down? I’m a left-wing nut job. It’s totally consistent for me to make fun of Bush. I suspect Ema was just throwing us all a bone. Hope the revelation doesn’t make your head asplode.
ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND….she’s from Tejas!
*faints*
*waves herbal smelling salts for slanagat*
Wow–this herbal stuff doesn’t work. He’s still out cold.
*waves jigger of whiskey under slanagat’s nose*
lmao- I guess I have you confused with someone else
It’s okay. If I didn’t have a mirror, I would probably do the same.
“Dear Diary: today, ema made a very funny joke at Bush’s expense. I cleaned up the blood from where the vein burst in my forehead, then threw out the popcorn I was eating. I’m pretty sure I won’t need a new keyboard.”
You started this ya know! It was that poem of Bushisms from the Ovular lol, I was sick from laughing. Good thing I work at home.
LOL! No, wait–pain is bad…
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I found another Bushism. I don’t think it has been mentioned yet:
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“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”
“The real question is, is our children learning?”
I actually kind of feel sorry for Bush. He’s not too bright, but you can tell he really cares about Americans and wants to help us put food on our families.
LOL–and help us practice our love…
“.. and wants to help us put food on our families.”
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I love a good food fight! Reminds me of Animal House.
Bush is a funny guy, sometimes he’s just asking for it! (Sorry about your popcorn PM)
Okay, this got a LOL.
Now my inner shopper wants to know where she got that kick butt dress…..
I would too, but I’d never be able to pull it off and then it’d depress me. Best just to not know. I saw a girl in the halls at school where I work and I was mentally like, “cute outfit, now if only I were ten years younger and thirty pounds lighter!”
I love the fact that the skirt isn’t half way up the thigh. It seems there are two lengths right now : “Granny” (floor length) and “Nobody needs to see that!” Add in heinous fabrics, with HUGE patterns (I’m pretty sure my mother’s curtains had flowers that size) and it looks like I may need to start brushing off my sewing machine.
IOW, I think I’m getting too old for what’s “In”.
It doesn’t hurt that she has nice long legs too… She can wear that length.
That’s true, my cousin is a couple inches shorter than me and it makes a HUGE difference when she tries on my skirts.
Have you noticed that all four new people are taller than their counterparts? I wonder if conservatism stunts your growth… How tall are you, btw?
I’m 5′7″ so it hasn’t stunted mine!
6′1″
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Not stunted either..
Yeah, I’m a 6′ 3″ linebacker-shaped liberal. To be fair though, I thought I was a conservative till I was about 22
Wow, thanks for being brave. Did you experiment with liberal ideas in school, then come out later, or did it all come crashing down on you one day?
It pretty much all happened in the last year and a half under Bush I. Between going to war to restore a king to his throne, and watching cops beating young girls at a demonstration against Bush just because they were at the back of a crowd that was trying to comply with police instructions to clear the street, I kind of lost my faith in the system over a period of about 9 months.
Wow.
I lost faith as well, to a degree. But I’m still a ModRep at heart! I thank God daily that I’m not a flaming right-wing nutjob.
Wait a minute. Maybe you’re secretly a liberal… *eyes suspiciously* Do you now, or have you ever had a liberal notion?
Wait a minute. Maybe you’re secretly a liberal… *eyes suspiciously* Do you now, or have you ever had a liberal notion?
Hey, wait. I’m 5′ 7″. Does that mean I’m supposed to be a conservative? *whimpers, hugs tie-dye shirt, sucks thumb*
i’m with you, there are some seriously butt ugly prints out there right now!
Too old? I’m still in college, and I can’t find too much that’s flattering in the way of bottoms. For someone of my body type, the choices are:
- Long peasant skirt
- Skirt that barely covers the hips
- Daisy Dukes
- Pants that fit my thighs, but are falling off my hips
- Something hideously ugly–either it looked cute on the rack, or it’s so hideous I’m not even going to bother trying it on
Maybe 2% of what I see in stores fits and flatters. So no, it definitely isn’t just you.
Not sure I agree with your overly modest assessment, Jane. It’s true that the shade of fire engine red of that particular dress isn’t flattering to everyone, but most women look well in some shade of red. The hemline length can be easily modified to wherever you wish in any alterations shop.
Well, I was thinking more of the way the dress is cut. I’m an hourglass (if not for the double D’s on my girls I’d be a pear) and I carry my weight in my hips and thighs. That dress would cling something terrible. The color would actually be the only benefit, with my coloring I look good in red, not so much the yellow though.
At the risk of losing my ‘Guy Card’… I like her shoes too. Elegant heels.
Those heels are killer, although just because I agree with you doesn’t mean your guy card doesn’t get revoked.
I think its rather nice to see a guy notice a woman’s shoes, after all a good pair
of shoes can turn the tide on how a dress looks on you, depending on how it makes the legs look
I think her heels rawk, but it’s also a killer look to wear red high heels with a black dress.
[why yes, I am a hussy, thank you]
In a more general sense, (and I know this might sound both weird and a little presumptuous), I think Michelle Obama has a beautiful, elegant, and understated “Jackie O” thing going on that I love.
I like that about her too, especially when she does the “flip” thing with her hair. I hate to be so picky, but did you notice her shoes are blue-tone red, and her dress is orange-tone red? Red’s a hard color to match, and the outdoor full sun is unforgiving, but the color difference still bugs me. I can haz therapeez?
It’s all right, society needs nuts like you too
No, btw, I didn’t notice. I’m very much a guy that way: red is red is red to me.
Agree with you here. I noticed it, too. The dress is an orangy tomato soup red, and the shoes are a bluish burgundy red. It’s not at all uncommon to get an item of clothing home and find out it doesn’t match at all, or matches in the flourescent store light but not outdoors, etc., so I tend to play it safe and aim for something that “goes with” rather than trying to match an exact shade.
Whew! I’m the same way you are, especially with shoes and purses. Call it a birth defect, but I don’t have a closet full of shoes. Still, nothing says “I’m dressed up” like that monochrome look, and the odder the color, the better! I’m too spartan to do it, but I appreciate the look.
No no, thank *you*….
Real men notice well-turned ankles. Your taste seems to have improved vastly overnight, thankfully!
while we’re kaffeklatching on fashion, can I say that it bugs the ever-lovong hell out of me that Obama seems to always tie his ties way too long? The tip should touch, but not exceed, the top of the belt.
The one that bugs me more, though, are guys that tie their ties too short, so that it looks as elegant as a lobster bib.
Oh, you mean the Oliver Hardy look! I have mentally kicked people for tying a tie like that.
That’s okay, if you have the leg room. Finger-pinching their heads off is good in tighter quarters.
Wow, questionly my masculinity already… I didn’t notice her shoes and her dress didn’t do anything for me. Then again, I usually expect a red dress to have more flair. Eh, I am very neutral about her look in that outfit but I can’t deny that her shoes are elegant… Now that I have noticed them.
And in my defense, I didn’t really notice her ass either. She doesn’t have one. I see a patch of red with a hand going through it. *blinks*
Oh DWN my friend… Michelle Obama DOES have an ass. Im very to sorry
to be a piggy in this respect but when it comes to the rear end Michelle could
“redistribute the wealth” and still have some left over. And before I get hounded
that’s not an insult… I likes me a woman with a butt.
Good thing we’re getting married then.
I thought we were already married? You remember? I stole you away from
your father? Arranged our marriage? We got married at the lovely ceremony
as my legions of doom launched their final attack to usurp the rest of civilization
under my evil maniacal grasp?
Although… after this little talk I think a second honeymoon is order….
MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Oh that’s right! I’m sorry, most evil overlords wait for my agreement to marry them and I get “rescued” by the hero. I’m soooooo glad you’re a more efficient evil warlord. I know my lips said no but my eyes said yes! *packs for second honeymoon*
If you are an evil overlord, or looking to become one, you really need to click on my name for a list of helpful tips.
Oh, and in case I never told you, the carpet of fawning peasents made for a truely memorable bridal procession. It was a little bumpy, but walking on their prostrate forms made my train look FABULOUS!
Go ahead guys… be jealous…. I gots me a winnAr!
I wasn’t invited? *pout* Pictures??
Well… in this case, if the little lady doesnt object you can come
along with the video camera and we can show washington what
TRUE bipartisanship looks like….
Hmmm.. I think this is the first time an evil overlord has stated
this but… I think Im gonna stop being bad now
Wow, Max. Whipped much?
At the risk of killing all the fun, just remember, I’m RANGER qualified.
Yeah, but Max is an evil overlord. And mom wants grandchildren she can see on a regular basis. All she has to do is visit us in the Fortress of Doom.
I have obviously overestimated Jane’s opinions..
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(just kiddin’, really! Jane’s opinions are invaluable, which I’m sure you will agree with.. )
As one of your fawning peasants, I’m pleased to have added to the flow of your train. That said, did ya just *have* to wear spike heels???
Im sorry… but your New Competent Overlord demanded them…
blame me, not her!
O_o…
Fester, your “Guy Card” is officially suspended. I showed this picture to several of my male friends and they agreed: If your eyes made it all the way down to the shoes, and that’s what you liked most…card suspended until you prove yourself again!
I don’t know if I agree with that–those shoes are way cool. And ‘yank on a males hormones’ red, as well!
Unc was hot after the woman in the McCain banner dress yesterday, so we’re encouraging him for getting better. *whispers* Baby steps, k?
Second! (LMFAO!)
The shoes are perfect, not to high of a heel either.
I’m a guy, my eyes don’t travel down that far..
Aw cmon Eddie, its ok to go down that far, as long as you take another long
gaze back up
hmm, all this attention on her butt, and I’m thinking,
secret service surprise buttsex in 3… 2… 1…
Thorry, the thighs the limit.. yuk yuk
I enjoy how perfectly honest this one is. Good show!
Ooh God..that was so funny! U guys here at pundikitchen got jokes…come on guys…Oooh poor Bush, we gonna miss him when he’s gone…of course, for good reasons!
peace2all
Yeah, ask Angela Merkel!
*rubs Tessie’s shoulders*
And I see “Barry” will be resigning his senate seat Sunday so he can avoid committing to anything during the lame duck session.
Nice work! Let’s hope he is a bit more than “present” when he assumes the office on 1/20.
It would be a little unfair for him to vote on something and then sign it, wouldn’t it? Besides, he has work to do, and his state has to get their new senator in and up to speed for the regular session of congress.
Being an Illinoisian, I hope that he vacates soon so that someone else can get in and keep the status quo, if not move forward. We’re in bad-enough shape we don’t need to be forgotten until the third week of January.
No, it would instead show commitment to something beyond vague campaign rhetoric.
He must make a stand as President and the work he has to do is an outgrowth o
f the lame duck session which this time around has extreme significance.
So, you think his limited time and attention would be better spent acting as junior senator than preparing to be president?
Personally, I hope the next president of the United States spends every second between now and January 20th preparing to take the reins. That’s just me, I likes the smart, prepared leaders
Wow, “Barry,” “avoid committing,” sarcastic “nice work,” and “voting ‘present’” all in the same post. That’s a lot of work to put a negative spin on a guy who’s got to hit the ground running in 68 days. Congress is in a lame duck session, which is the perfect time for the new Senator to get ready for his job, too. But, of course this is all so very sinister!
It’s nice to have a president and first lady that know how to wear their clothes well.
Also I thought she had a bigger booty.
Yeah, but still she has enough to make booty-quake at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
If it was Bill Clinton it would probably be both.
Lol! Clinton is a horndog!
*slaps knee* That was a good one! Whew–let me catch my breath!
Slick Willy Strikes Again
Great. The country is on the verge of the worst situation in 80 years and you yabbos prattle on about the presidential wardrobe. That’s it, I’m turning this dam’ thing off and going to the bar.
Yabbo-yay!
Ummmmm, what part of, “I’m on a political HUMOR site” did you not understand? Or, should I say humour for our UK friends?
The guy’s name IS Schmoe after all…
He’s an insult to all Schmoes the world over.*
.
*except UK, Canada and Australia, where they are “Schmoues.”
UK… would that United Kingdoum?
I’m an American, so I don’t know. I can get the answer, tho. Plug your ears, k?
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UNCLE FESTER!!!
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There. We’ll be properly sorted out in short order, chap!
Oi! Bloody hell, I was being facetious!
So was I, Love.
You can always turn to an American living in Australia. I have had to learn how to talk and write so that others will know what the heck I’m saying.. *sigh*
I would *love* to have that trouble, Eds!
Yeah, but with the good comes the bad.. always the bad..
If you start singing “Every rose has it thorn,” I promise that I will haul back and put something on you so bad, you’ll need Ajax to get it off!
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Just sayin’.
LOL! Thanks for the heads up.. Don’t want to have to scour with Ajax.
Canada and Australia also thank you for spelling that correctly
On behalf of all of us Americans, you’re welcome, Canada and Australia. In turn, we’re gratified that we could colour our prose in your favourite way.
Here’s a though as you leave.. don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out..
Strange eddie… I always envisioned you as “Dont let the door hit ya… where the
good lord split ya!” kinda guy!
I thought of him more as a “Are you still here?” kinda guy.
Either/or.. the phrase I chose was one of my dad’s favoUrites..
He sounds like a coloUrful guy.
bloody oath he was.. My favoUrite was “Son, you would just soon sandpaper a bobcats butt in a telephone booth then piss me off.”
Was he from Texas?
How’d you know that?!?!
Because I’m from Texas, and it sounds like something my dad would say.
I wonder why no one has seized on this little gem yet:
NEW YORK (AP) — Lindsay Lohan referred to President-elect Barack Obama as the country’s “first colored president” in an interview on “Access Hollywood.” Describing her experience on Election Day, Lohan said: “It was really exciting. It’s an amazing feeling. It’s our first colored president.”
To be fair, she thought he was colored pink. Those drugs are some REALLY good sh*t.
LOL!!
Or maybe paisley?
That would certainly cover all the bases!
Oh Lindsay… when will she learn to keep her legs AND mouth shut…
Maybe when she decides whether she’s gay or bi, because she sure doesn’t know at the moment. But at least she keeps the tabloids interesting. I find her trainwreck life far more entertaining than finding out who Jennifer Aniston is boffing this week, or what Zac Efron’s hair is doing.
Yeah, me too… NO! WAIT! I deny reading the celebrity gossip on MSN!
I would just like to say
Tequila for all!
…or Rum. We *did* have the Captain Morgan LOL up today. It would be patriotic to get into the spirit(s).
Hey yeah, good point. I am good friends with the captain.
LOL! I’m more of a bat juice type, but they don’t ever do anything cool. Having said that, is it any accident that you never see Captain Morgan in the same room with Burger King?
They do one thing that is cool–they support the work of bat conservation international!
Me and Jose Cuervo always go on like a house on fire..
I’m so glad I’m not the only one who saw that! When I was watching the news, I was like “Ass grab incoming!” and my husband gave me a weird look.
Gotta love the 2-D perspective, it makes one huge ass look like he’s grabbing another.
Win.
Where would you like your new Internet shipped?
Good one
Thats a total no win situation.