If I knew how to work a computer machine…
If I knew how to work a computer machine, I might be inclined to take offense to all of your degrading photo captions.
(John McCain)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: Akmed
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Enough old McCain jokes. D: Seriously.
Actually this joke is about his being willfully ignorant. There are plenty of people older than him who have chosen to learn to use computers, but for some reason he’s chosen not to bother.
Either that, or he’s too stupid to learn to use one.
Neither of these are positive traits in a man who wants to lead the free world in the 21st Century.
Actually you’re the ignorant one. McCain knows perfectly well how to use the computer, he just gets someone to help him with the typing because he’s physically unable to do it for very long.
Wanna know why? He was tortured in Vietnam while fighting for your freedom to be an ignorant jerk.
He lost… does that mean that freedom is gone? God I am happy that the election will be over soon. Otherwise I will rip the next moronically militaristic guy’s head off.
I served but never fought an enemy face to face. Does that mean I didn’t defend our freedoms? Try keeping your idiotic ad hominem insults off of the honorable service of our nation’s veterans
Who are you talking to? IPG did not insult veterans, he was making a sarcastic reply to Scott’s comment. I respect your service, and i am sure Master X does as well.
“He was tortured in Vietnam while fighting for your freedom to be an ignorant jerk.”
Then people should carry on being ignorant jerks, otherwise it was just a waste, don’t ya think?
You Betch Ya!
That made me uncomfortable about him possibly getting elected. What if it
had done something to his mind? I pretty sure PTSD can emerge years after the traumatic event. If not, I still don’t think he could have escaped without
SOME psychological scaring.
That’s odd, I gave Harpuia as my name, Why did it call me Common Sense?
Oh, wait… that comment was posted earlier than I thought… I thought that it was the one I had just posted…
seriously, this site/the captions are so liberal its disgusting…i love how nobody bashes obama, yet everyone picks on McCain….I honestly hate them both, but whoever makes the captions needs to get their heads out of their you-know-whats and try maybe making some more unbiased comments….
that’s because Obama doesn’t have any tics, weird family, doesn’t screw up when he talks, isn’t stupid, doesn’t have a pregnant daughter, isn’t corrupt, doesn’t stick out his tongue….. Obama isn’t funny.
i agree…. but this one is pretty funny!!!!! ROLF!!!
I loled!
Or at least, snickered.
“Ahoy hoy?”
Eeeeexcellent.
Methinks PK’s trying to persuade voters for today. ;D
Oh no, we’ve been found out! *presses red button and runs*
LOL!
I mean – OH NOES!! RUN!!
What’s different?
Let me get this straight.
The plural of chad is . . . chad?
McCain can’t use a computer much because of his wounds. He can’t type without pain. So this is just mean, not funny.
In before all the “then he shouldn’t be running a country!”. Why not say that to FDR, eh?
copying my reply from below to Master-Of-Puppets who said almost the exact same inane comment that you (Someone not Phaelin) did:
/quote
have you never heard of a desk where the keyboard tray can be lowered to a comfortable height? i work for a cheap-a$$ company and even i’ve got one of those.
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his arms aren’t the issue. at all. so quit saying it.
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he can’t work a computer because he grew up in a time when they didn’t need them. once computers came into relevance he was past the time when he really gave two sh*ts about learning to use one.
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my grandmother is younger than him. her arms are fully functional and she only uses a computer for solitaire because she’s afraid she’ll “break it” because she has no clue what she’s doing.
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just for clarification i’m voting for him. i’m not a lefty nut-job jumping on you because you’re “defending” mccain. i’m jumping on you because you’re a moron.
/endquote
Not to start an argument, but keyboard height isn’t the only reason a person couldn’t type.
There are many, many bones, ligaments, tendons, and muscles that control the fingers and the wrists. An injury to almost any one of those could cause problems when typing.
I’m not saying that he does know a computer, but I’m just saying that what he said about his injuries might actually be true.
also not arguing… just being the devils advocate:
based on the picture above and his ability to point his finger at something, he can at least hunt and peck type.
i’m just sayin…..
He wouldn’t be able to use the computer much anyway, as everything he types, emails, or saves could be subpoenaed (sp?) later. See also: George W. Bush and his email habits while Gov vs. his email habits as POTUS.
Grr. Sneaky bastards.
and that is why Palin conducted state business on … YAHOO … what an airhead.
It is true. His arms were broken so many times that he has a very limited range of motion.
Give it a rest. For fuck’s sake.
X rated version.
Give it a rest, for heaven’s sake (see comments below).
G rated version.
No, no, not funny at all.
It’s effing hilarious. In some laces McCain wouldn’t be able to vote and he wants us to vote for him? FUN-NY.
So you’re saying it’s funny when handicapped people can’t vote?
you insensitive jackass, he can’t work a computer/type because he can’t raise his hands high enough because of the injuries he suffered in vietnam!
have you never heard of a desk where the keyboard tray can be lowered to a comfortable height? i work for a cheap-a$$ company and even i’ve got one of those.
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his arms aren’t the issue. at all. so quit saying it.
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he can’t work a computer because he grew up in a time when they didn’t need them. once computers came into relevance he was past the time when he really gave two sh*ts about learning to use one.
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my grandmother is younger than him. her arms are fully functional and she only uses a computer for solitaire because she’s afraid she’ll “break it” because she has no clue what she’s doing.
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just for clarification i’m voting for him. i’m not a lefty nut-job jumping on you because you’re “defending” mccain. i’m jumping on you because you’re a moron.
the_original_shortright, you have just restored my faith in the American Sense of Humor.
thanks fjaradvax. you have restored my faith in user names i can’t pronounce even if i was completely and totally trashed!
wait…. were you really complimenting Master-Of-Puppets and mocking me? i need to not try to pop in here for 30 seconds during the work day when i’m suprt busy… because that’s when i miss sarcasm and such.
*dunce hat at the ready in case i was being mocked*
No, my comment wasn’t intended ironically; the dunce hat is unnecessary unless of course we’re both wrong and master-of-puppets got in there with a stealthy pre-emptive ‘pretending not to know the difference between a naff disability gag and an actual joke’ attack. -_-
*throws dunce hat back in the attic*
yay!
Steven Hawking can work a computer.
Zing!!!!
How many words a minute can he type?
Enough to change the course of cosmic research worldwide!
Yep, and now he can even vote independently with his sip/puff machine!
He also had a wheel chair designed for his needs.
And all John McCain needs is to lower his keyboard a little.
For the record, I’m not trying to be an asshole about this. I just like to display my random knowledge when the opportunity arises. Call it a hobby.
Stephen Hawking’s voicebox is, technically, a computer. He can, of course, use it. But when he is writing or doing anything else involving a PC, he dictates everything to his assistant (usually a grad student), or, at home, to his wife.
But enough about Hawking. Let’s talk McCain. Injuries or no, he has openly said that he rarely uses email. However, I have read that he was able to program a universal remote for his family to use at home. As there are endless modifications for people with various injuries to help them use computers more comfortably (which I’m sure he can afford), his remote programming skills lead me to believe that if he felt he needed to, he could pick up basic computer skills fairly quickly. He is obviously doing just fine without those abilities; hell, he’s been in politics for quite some time now and it hasn’t caused him any problems.
Oh, for goodness sake………. I’m older than McCain and I’ve been operating my own computer for years prior to whiuch I was a data input operator for many additional years. The position of the keyboard is essential for both comfort and convenience but it can be placed in most any position needed. I have a quadraplegic friend who uses a mouth-held plastic pointer to operate his keyboard and he even creates home designs for the handicapped on his computer to earn his living. So, age and physical disabilities are only a matter of ‘want’. Evidently McCain has never wanted to learn something new. His loss……. in his attempts to keep up with the ever-changing world we live in. But, I don’t think being a senator or even president requires computer literacy. So don’t knock his lack of skills or make excuses for him either.
You do have a point, but it does matter what the disability is.
Granted, he might not have the “want” to learn how to use a computer, but that may have been caused by the injury causing pain while trying to learn to use it the “proper way”.
Using a computer keyboard or mouse does require a certain amount of dexterity, and if he has suffered injuries to his arms, wrists, or fingers, it could be extremely difficult and frustrating to learn a new way to type that is effective.
Besides, why do it yourself when you could have a secretary type for you?
Good grief……. I made a spelling boo-boo. Will definitely have to file my fingernails a bit shorter so I won’t be hitting two keys at the same time. Sorry about my error…….. I have never been accused of being perfect.
The internet is a series of tubes.
I like this one, it’s not even as biased.
I laughed aloud.
Ha ha ha!
Yet McCain can fly a plane, which takes more skill flying a plane or operating a computer? Exactly, there’s a reason why you’ve never seen obama drive or fly anything.
Yes repetitive movements of his harm causes pain in McCain’s shoulders due to the torture he suffered at the hands of PK’s buddies the north Vietnamese (being as they’re both againt free speech and pro mccain torture). He knows how to use the internet, he usually has his wife dictate his emails for him and he himself visits drudge and a few other sites. The fact that McCain’s 2000 campaign spearheaded the use of the internet for political fundraising seems lost on the Obamatons.
he also crashed three planes.
Three crashes that didn’t have to happen, you know, if the pilot had been competent.
Crash #1: Stalled his own plane and knocked himself unconscious.
Crash #2: Flew too low to the ground to view casinos in Rio and severed power lines. This was during the gambling addiction years.
Crash #3: Stalled his own plane again on his way home from a date, ejected himself, lost the plane.
Pesky facts and their pesky truth!
Exactly how many missions did he fly total?
23 and he lost a plane on 2 of those. That’s 5 planes total. I hold nothing against the guy for his time in the war, I just wish he would stop acting like going to war makes you somehow qualified for the presidency. If that’s the case, then there are a lot of GED toting infantry flunkies who want their turn in the oval office.
I linked a site that has more details than I can give you, from people who should know. It’s called “Vietnam Veterans Against John McCain” and details his highly rewarded, less than stellar military career. (Sidenote: He used to be pretty cute!)
Name one thing that Obama accomplished as a legislator.
So roughly an 80% success rate at flying a high speed plane at night onto an aircraft carrier during a war. Ok. Yeah, I see where that might be an issue *rolls eyes*
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And I’m sorry to do this, but in order for me to actually believe you, you’re going to have to back up your claims with some evidence that isn’t from a blog. Yes, I can go get that evidence on my own, but you’re the one who started making claims, so you’re the one who needs to back them up.
It isn’t that going to war qualifies him for being president. It shows that he has a better understanding of not only war tactics, but what the soldiers are going through.
(As an aside, I’m a Democrat. And yes, I voted for Obama.)
Anyway, the war experience is far from him only qualification.
And who really cares if a nominee, or even a President, can fly a plane.
(Flashback: “Mission Accomplished”, photos of Bush in his flight suit. Haha, there’s a story for the kids.)
Hey, did you guise know we are friends with the North Vietnamese?
*waves*
And I can see North Vietnam from my house!
You do realise north vietnam is Not a country.
You do realise i Am sarah palin.
LOL @ “Obamaton” — even better than Obamacommie
I’m gonna be honest with you (from someone in the (ch)Air Force)…. It doesn’t take too much skill to fly a plane. Some, but not a whole lot… Which is why he crashed 3.. or 4? times.
Hell, I voted for the guy and I thought it was funny. I’m sure he manages well enough to get what he needs to do done anyway; running the White House IT department is not part of the job description.
*John McCain could land his A-4E on a surging carrier deck at night, but Obama has the audacity to run campaign ads saying McCain is “out of touch because he could not use a computer.”
THIS
How’s that audacious, exactly?
Without so much as glancing at a recipe, I can make lasagna from scratch that would make you think you died and went to heaven, but my neighbot has the audacity to say that I can’t park for s#!t because I blocked her driveway.
Should be “neighbor”; I’m pretty sure she’s not a robot.
How about I break your fingers, hands, wrist, arms, and shoulders for years and then you can make fun of war injerys
war injuries
nobody’s making fun of his injuries. They are only pointing out that they do not prevent him from using email.
Several hours later I am still laughing at this lolz.
Aside from “his” use of the term “computer machine” (like snow machine), the phrase, “I might be inclined to take offense,” almost makes him sound like Clint Eastwood in a cowboy movie which makes it even more funny. He was hilarious to make fun of, absolutely never of the most honored service he has given the USA, but a lot of the more obvious problematic political concepts he has been associated with which just opens him up to be considered a 300 year old in need of a new source of life, etc. Anyway, if you look at all the horrid lolz I’ve made of him and his party, seeing this lolz just completely has cracked me into pieces. I still must admit, he has despite the harsh campaigning, to his credit enhanced the honor of respecting his fellow candidate very graciously. For that I have acquired a considerable amount of new-found respect and admiration for him aside from the military service under which he came as close to the ultimate sacrifice one can come to. Despite that and separately from it, as well as other honorable actions he has taken, there was humor to be had.
STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! McCain can’t use a computer b.c of his hands and arms!!! he was POW for heavens sake ppl! the tissue etc in his hands and arms was so extensivly damaged that he is phsycally unable to sit down and use a computer!! so stop it with the degrading insults about McCain and computers!!
QQ moar.
Handicapped people use computers on a daily basis and quite well.
He refuses to learn, period.
But he can sit and write? If he is dextrous enough to write and speak with his hands (which he generally does), he can type. He’s old and stubborn and confused by the internets.
Come on people! Whoever captioned this has no clue about John McCain and his history. It’s not that he doesn’t know HOW to work a computer, it’s that he physically CAN’T! He was tortured for 5 1/2 years in Vietnam, his arms and fingers were broken repeatedly. He can’t lift his arms up enough or use his fingers well enough to type.
Political views aside, this is just plain rude and uncalled for.
Anyone notice that the caption reads that if he, “knew” not, if he “could”. If I was in his position I probably wouldn’t waste my time learning some computer machine anyway especially if I could afford 7 houses and a staff to record my dictations and read emails to me so I didn’t even have to look at them. I think the issue of whether he can or not use a computer or wants to or not is moot and not brought into question by this lol. What I think is humorous in this lolz is the fact that he has been made fun of by NUMEROUS lolz and it’s as if he’s saying something about it. I think primarily the humor behind knowing how to use a computer is more about his privileged status being too high for such lowly things and then saying something about it like an old man scolding kids making noise outside his house in the street. It’s funny, especially since he LOST! That’s probably the real reason people are complaining is because they are sore losers, siding with his party.
I agree. You guys need to get it into your heads that this site is intended to be humorous. I mean, we’ve made Bush look far more retarded than he hopefully is on numerous occasions.
And those of you complaining about PK being too liberal? Get out there and caption some pictures. Add a little of your conservative humor. Make fun of us! I doubt many of us will take offense. And those who do will just comment and probably make you guys laugh a little with their comebacks. This site is run fairly democratically. If you have a problem with it, change things.
…unless, of course, you enjoy complaining. In which case, go for it, haha.