Fortunately…
Fortunately, the stocks rebounded off of Carl’s bald spot to stop the fall.
Who is that in the picture? Tell us in the Comments
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: Tim
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I thought that profit graphs were read from left to right…
sigh… “to stop the FALL”
so yes, the graph is read left to right. the line “bounced off his head” to stop the free falling…
There’s no use in trying to explain, you’ll get frustrated and just confuse poor Rofl even more.
Why’s his wedding band on his right hand? Or do my eyes deceive me?
Carl has had a confusing couple of weeks.
Having profits bounce off your head does that to a person.
I wish people would throw money at my head.
You and me both. I have Excedrin just in case I get a money based blunt force trauma. Instead I just use it to tolerate frustration on random days.
You use Excedrin for that? I use whiskey. Much tastier!
I avoid drinking but you have a point.
“I feel sorry for people who don’t drink because when they wake up in the morning, that’s the best they’re going to feel all day.” — Frank Sinatra
Actually, it was Dean Martin, but same family
Usually that’s something one does when their spouse dies, especially older folks who still know that tradition. It’s often also done by gay couples, though by his apparent age I’d guess the former. But could be either really.
Thanks for the clear-up, blah! Learn something new every day.
Also, some orthodox churches wear the band on the right hand.
Just a note.
CARL SAVES THE ECONOMY. Waiting for the McCain camp to start fapping off to “Carl the Investment Banker” in 3, 2, 1…
Meanwhile back at the Obama camp:
“OK, as plain old Liberal Democrats, what more can we do to screw up this nation before we have to quit pretending and come out as the true Socialists that we are?”
Who’s pretending? There is nothing wrong with socialism, I just wish it were for everyone, not just the rich.
Why Socialism DOES Suck – By x-bert:
When you’re living at home with your parents: You have a small job, but most things are paid for by them, you have to do everything they say.
Socialism: You have a job, but most things are paid for by them, you have to do everything they say.
Representative Democracy: You may or may not have a job, depending your your level of motivation, you pay for most things yourself, you get to vote for teh people who will be telling you what to do.
Conclusion: Socialism is like living with your parents, only your parents are the Government.
The End
P.S. Please excuse the ‘teh’. It was unintentional.
Bad analogy, because Socialism and Representative Democracy are not mutually exclusive. Socialism is defined by democratic control of the means of production. Socialism is not living with your parents, it’s living with kind roommates, where you pool your money to buy the economy pack of TP and save money over going it alone. Sure, there are the occasional arguments about the lazy guy who won’t do his dishes, but the solution is simple, kick him our or pile the dishes in his room. Capitalism is like living in a room in your nosy landlord’s house, where he keeps trying to screw you out of every penny by charging you per sheet of TP.
Ok, I’ll give you that – unfortunately when we’re talking governments, there is no ‘kicking out’ of the lazy guy or piling the dishes in his room…
Also, Socialism still sucks.
Also, I didn’t mention Capitalism.. I suppose I was talking more along the lines of governmental organization rather than economic theory.
Then your analysis is fatally flawed. Capitalism and Socialism are economic theories. Representative democracy is a political theory. You are comparing apples and oranges.
That’s what I just said.
And btw, Socialism sucks.
Good thing *you’re* not a moron, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to argue so eloquently like you do…
I don’t require eloquence, I’m not running for office.
Maybe I’ll put it more simply. Socialism isn’t a form of government.
But by applying the economic theory of Socialism TO government, you get BIG government.
… which sucks. IMO.
Which is why I wish you conservatives had stuck to your values. If you were really all about states rights and fiscal responsibility, we could focus on small scale socialism at the state and local level, in the states that wanted it, and we could have pure dog eat dog capitalism, for the states that wanted that. Then we could see which really worked better. People would all leave the states that failed and move to the ones that worked.
Nah- the socialists would figure out a way to force people to stay in the failed states. Just like Clinton tried to punish the rich for moving their companies overseas. Didn’t work, Comrade Seth !
Huh? You make no sense. I’m not talking about dissolving the union, and freedom to travel is enshrined in the constitution. I also mentioned that there would be capitalist states and socialist states. Now why would the capitalist states let the socialist states imprison their citizens. Your whole argument boils down to “Socialism BAD!!11!” And your analogy to Clinton is simply nonsensical, I can’t even begin to parse your meaning.
What you mean “you conservatives” ??
What guarantees the roomates are “kind”? You assume a lot. Why can’t there be any “kind” landlords? Capitalism allows people the chance to be the landlord if they chose it.
And socialism allow everyone to collectively be the landlords. There may be kind landlords under capitalism, but they get killed and eaten by the majority of the owning class with sociopathic tendencies.
Why do you assume the majority of the owning class have sociopathic tendencies? You have a very negative outlook on humanity. Some may be sociopathic but most aren’t. Anyway, socialism isn’t that all bad as long as it is limited, but freedom is always better.
What I’m saying is that our system rewards brutal, ruthless people. Those people can rise to the top more easily, unencumbered by morals empathy. So you get a lager than average number of sociopaths in the higher ranks of the business world.
–
And socialism is freedom. It helps guarantee that the owning class can’t use their money to economically enslave you. What use is ‘freedom’ if a cabal of rich asses can simply starve you to death for not agreeing to be a serf.
I’m sure there is a healthy balance of the two opposing forces somehow… But, I would like to have the opportunity to be wealthy, I own property and I am a landlord and I’m very very nice!
What I don’t want are rules that force me to accept renters that don’t pay, don’t respect my property, etc…
Then you should move to Northern Europe.
That’s where ingenuity and revolution come into play.
Oh, and also, capitalism provides a path for the working class to become the owning class if it’s regulated well. That path should always be protected. I don’t believe socialism provides that.
What the FUCK are you talking about??? Have you ever studied a socilaistic country? Say, like NORWAY? I wouldn’t exactly say you aren’t free here, the difference is that if you lose your job you won’t be screwed, and yet, if you work your ass off, you’ll climb to the top… Know what you are talking about or shut the FUCK up.
Ok, is there a borough in New York or LA named “Norway”, or are you just the most rude English-speaking Norwegian evar?
Sure it does. You think there aren’t rich people in Sweden? Socialism allows for private property, it isn’t communism. The path that capitalism
provides is not as certain. On average, it takes over five generations for a poor family to become middle class. Capitalism lets the rich erect barriers to keep the rest of us from becoming rich. The real wages of the middle class in America have been stagnant for decades, even as the rich got richer.
–
You want to see how a hybrid socialist/capitalist system works? Look up ‘Mondragon Collective.’ It’s in the Basque region of Spain. They have cooperative everything there. Want to start a small business? There is a coop business consultancy that will help you plan, a coop staffing and payroll to help you hire and pay your employees, coop banks to loan you money, and coop ad agencies to get the word out. They have a 20-1 income limit, you can never make more than 20 times what the poorest people make. It used to be a 5-1 limit, but people thought that was unfair and voted to raise the limit. Now no one complains.
Interesting… So, what would you do with sports stars? Or hollywood, or pop stars in a situation like that? Would you put a limit on how much they could earn? Do you think there is any incentive to innovate anything like the technology we have today? I’m not saying it’s entirely necessary to have more and better technology, but it is nice to have…
I am not really seeing that much innovation these days since we are all struggling.
As for sports stars, movie stars, pop stars… Do you honestly think they are worth millions of dollars? I wouldn’t pay millions of dollars for them and I like some of them.
Actually, I don’t either!
@whatcrap: Do you really think that people only do things for money? Look at the Open Source movement in software, people have given away billions of hours of work that everyone from poor Africans to rich corporations have found incredibly valuable. Why did they do it? If someone won’t try their hardest for a reasonably large amount of money, they don’t deserve it and I guarantee that somneone else will come along and do their job happily, and well.
–
In fact, studies have shown money destroys intrinsic motivation. People who do what they love as a hobby, and then get paid for it, do not love what they do as much, because the motivation is now external to the task.
The reason they do open source work is to pump up their reputations, which would translate into big salaries. I think you can find studies showing just about anything you want to illustrate, I have seen studies that show that money motivates poor school children to make better grades. There has to be that personal motivation, and it has to be something tangible.
Reminds me of my art. Once it became just another commodity and a competitive issue in art school, I just stopped.
That’s too bad… The art “industry” is dog eat dog, talk about competition! (I was married to an artist)
Oh yes, I went into media arts and animation just wanting to make games and do something I love. Then it became this high pressure issue where I needed to view my classmates as competitors instead of fellow artists. Just sucked the soul right out of it for me.
I still doodle from time to time but that is rare. I think my writing is way better anyway so maybe it is for the best.
Our system isn’t truely capitalist because of the socialist aspects
in it. In a truly capitalistic society we would rely on private
organizations to take care of any social supports. Secondly, by
bailing out the corporate ass-hats that made poor judgments, we
again veer from a capitalist docterine. The reason the greedy
sociopaths are greedy sociopaths has to do with the socialist tendency
to put the burden on everyone instead of expecting the ones that
made the poor decision to deal with their choice.
To say capitalism is bad based on our system is a text book
platitude that any jack ass in a corduroy suit could spew to his
class of disciples, but has no bearing in real life. Why could you
not rely on the general good nature of mankind to take care of
mankind? Freedom is better, and expecting someone else to be
responsible for anyone other than themselves(family) is ridiculous.
Wouldn’t that prevent him from excelling? If a few don’t excel we
are destined for mediocrity. Is that what you want?
Thanks. You made the point much better than I..
Socialism isn’t defined by lack of freedom. In fact, you can be more free in a socialist country when things are done right. You’re more free to keep tabs on publicly run institutions than on private ones who don’t have to tell you anything unless you can find a way to threaten their money supply… which is much more difficult when we’re all working at it separately.
Unless of course by “freedom” you mean the ability to do whatever you want no matter who it hurts. Socialism does call for more public responsibility than Capitalism.
Socialism is lack of freedom. Being able to do whatever you want as long as you do not interfere with another man’s pursuits of life , liberty, and happiness is the very essence of capitalism, true capitalism. Socialism, when it is a personal choice can be rewarding, but to require someone to participate in a socialist society is ludicrous. Explain the freedom in requiring someone to abide by doctrine in which they do not believe. Would you like it if someone told you what ideals were okay to have? Probably not.
No, capitalism means being able to interfere with other
people’s pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness. That is what the accumulation of capital is all about: controlling other people. Nobody is requiring anyone to participate in a socialist society, any more than you are requiring we participate in a capitalist one. However, if we have a socialist society, don’t think for a minute that you can reap the benefits of membership without contributing.
.. and who exactly enforces the notion that “he who does not work shall not eat?
Someone’s cheery…
In bed…
Idealism is a dangerous road Seth. I can prove this time.
I know what you mean. The idealism of the neo-cons nearly destroyed our country. The problem with ideologues is that they are SO convinced they are right, they will keep doing the wrong thing even when it has been proven wrong.
And the Libtoons are different how?
Nah, repubs have done a pretty good job screwing things up by going to war for questionable reasons, giving the finger to scientific education and research, applauding sending jobs overseas and otherwise making a mess out of the economy, and inspiring a culture of fear and fascism. You guys win!
Yeah! Can’t wait until Obama, who opposed the surge which won the conflict for us, gets in and he gets “tested”! I wonder which building(s) they will blow up in the first 6 months of our new untested leaders administration?
Won? Hear that everybody?!! We WON!!!
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
pretty much, yes…
Care to go over to Tikrit and relay this fact to my friend who has to dodge IED’s on a daily basis? I’m sure he’d love to hear the fact that we’ve won.
Yeah, usually when one side wins, both sides know it….. Failure to notify the opposition….!
US: Hey, we’re just calling to let you know – we won.
Them: What? wtf mate? How do you figure?
US: Didn’t you notice the surge?
Them: You mean that crappy “energy” drink thing?
US: NO – all our soldiers.. the extras…
Them: Oh.. well, .. kinda
US: They won, so WE won
Them: Crap… alright.. thanks for letting us know.
Ya, news to me!
Al Qaeda supports McCain, lol.
Hamas has endorsed Obama!
Your name suits you.
Thanks! I like it myself. So, instead of attacking my name, why not tell me what you have against anything I have said so far?
Let’s see.. what do I have against what you’ve said so far:
You’re a moron, for starters.
That’s nice.
Don’t take it too hard – it’s just an opinion.
Because they want McCain to win, and they hope that their endorsement will hurt Obama. A McCain win will give them a solid enemy, which helps with recruiting. It will also make the US look less legitimate in the world’s eyes, which helps their cause. Jeez, man, think! You really think a terrorist organization would come out and endorse the guy they actually want to win? Common sense says they wouldn’t.
But, they later withdrew it! I don’t think they’re that smart…
Smart enough to implement a plan that destroyed two buildings with the intent for more, killed thousands of people, and has America living in fear to this very day…
I don’t live in fear.
I know I’m supposed to (booga-booga-booga) because the terrorists hate our freedom (booga-booga-booga) but looking at their targets — WTC and the Pentagon — it becomes clear to those with a lucid thought path that the intent of the terrorist attacks was America’s military-industrial complex, its financial and militaristic influence in the world.
Had they wanted to attack our freedom, wouldn’t they have thought to strike a more pertinent symbol of said freedom, like the Statue of Liberty?
No, because probably not enough innocents would be killed and therefore no terror, they are terrorists after all. They aren’t interested in killing our symbolism, they want us weak or dead or under their submission. That’s also a good reason to attack our militaristic influence because we would be much easier to subdue. Sharia for all, that is the goal.
Eh I think a few malls would have been better for fear mongering.
Clearly they do like symbolism because they attacked on the 11th of September. I shouldn’t need to tell you this is represented in the date system used by North America as 9-11. And as I recall, 911 is the emergency services number for USA
We were talking about Hamas…
And I’m surprised you didn’t spell it “socialest”, lol.
that musta really stung! he’s wiping the tears away…
That’s gunna leave a bump!
BTW… THANKS CARL!
Looks like it hurt quite a bit. Heavy stocks falling from great height would do that..
What’s this? A funny, non-partisan image? =O
You, sir, are a winner.
Hear, hear.
Ha, NICE! And I agree with KC.
It had to come down at some point, they were artificially inflated anyway because of all the weird things they were doing on Wallstreet…
“…all the weird things they were doing on Wallstreet…”
Hmmmm, where do I sign up? I never get to do weird things!
[except shirk work and read and post stoopid comments]
Oh, I bet you do weird things all the time!!
Quick mimicing my life…
They were artificially inflated because when George W.’s shadow government – read: terrorists – flew planes into the WTC buildings – read: termite-laced buildings – W comes on TV and says “You wanna help America? Go buy something”.. and being the faithful idiots that they are, they did – on credit.
Here ya go – *hands tin foil hat to nutcase* Wear it with pride!!
I always did think that W would look good in a foil hat.
And.. LMFAO @ My typo you didn’t catch.. i meant tHermite, of course.. not TERMITE-laced.. LMAO!!!11
lol! I did wonder what you meant by that, poor starving termites, since they were steal buildings…
Oy.
Steel buildings, you mean.
(I still wonder how no other steel & concrete buildings have ever collapsed due to fire before or after…)
Oops! Well a few typos should be allowed in here anyway. I just started reading a book by the folks at Popular Mechanics debunking the 9/11 conspiracy myths… I’ll get back to you on that!
Debunk away.
Mythbusters “debunked” the moon landing myths too – which only proved how EASY it would have been to fake it.
I fear neither debauchery or debunkery.
… cuz they weren’t laced with thermite.
… or …. cuz they weren’t infested with termites… LOL
This was actually taken from sadguysontradingfloors.tumblr.com
Wow, I thought that would be a dead or inappropriate link, but its actually funny!
That’s a win.
If only Carl had stood on his toes, I might have saved tens of thousands. Otherwise, thanks Carl!!
… Carl, that slacker. Least he meant well.
Yeah really, what the hell Carl.
They need to give those guys step ladders…
This has to be one of the funniest things I’ve seen on these sites.
Boing!
Good job Carl. Give that guy a klondike bar!
No idea who that is, but the pic is taken at the German stock exchange in Frankfurt, pretty sure.
Anyone who wants to vote for McCain because he’s a “Fiscal Conservative” needs to click my name.
O live that in the finest Gary Larson tradition this guy is named Carl.
Unless he really is.
That should be “I LOVE”. Stupid fingers…